Give Her Some Credit
by kmwhyte
Summary: Edward leaves Bella, like in New Moon, after they have sex. Bella gets pregnant and has Renesmee. Twenty Years Later, The Cullens start school at the same school as Renesmee. It's Complete! Sequel Up!
1. I'll Love You Forever, But Now It's Over

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything Twilight-related. Wish I did, but I don't. Oh well.**

**Story Summary: Edward leaves Bella, like in New Moon, after they have sex. Bella gets pregnant and has Renesmee. Twenty Years Later, The Cullens start school at the same school as Renesmee. First Fanfic, gonna try and make it long!**

**BPOV**

He just left.

He just told me he didn't want me and left me behind.

I knew things would be different, I knew that four nights ago. He told me he loved me then and I wore down his self-control. It was magic, amazing magic. He seemed content, happy even, but it must not have been what he thought it would be.

The next night was my birthday party, there's an event I would like to go back in time to change. Maybe I could have rearranged the order of events, cake first, or maybe Edward could have unwrapped the presents like he did in my room. Pointless I'm sure, Danger Magnet would probably stab herself with a fork.

That's where it all went wrong, the combination I'm sure. He saw how "frail" I am, a stupid human and realized I wasn't worthy of him. I've know that for months, I wish he could have figured that out before the sex. It just makes it worse, knowing how much we shared. How much I gave him only to watch him leave me behind.

Oh who am I kidding? I wouldn't trade that night for anything. It was perfect. All of the Cullens had left to hunt before my party, a whole lot of good that did. Edward spent the night with me, like always. Charlie was working the overnight shift. I never thought Edward would bend his rules, let alone break them, but he did. Those rules crashed and burned that night, so did my rocking chair.

It was beautiful, it was perfect.

And the more I think about it… it makes me sick, literally.

He said he didn't love me, that he didn't want me. I really wish I could feel the same, instead of this broken person I feel like. Not broken, shattered. I'll never be put back together, I know it.

Everything feels numb now. Like the world is covered in Jello, it doesn't seem real. I can't seem to close my window, just hoping he'll hop though it and tell me it was some elaborate joke that

Emmett forced him to play. But that's not gonna happen.

He's gone.

He's not coming back. None of them are.

I'm on my own.

God, it makes me sick.


	2. You're in Ruins

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or the characters. I know, I'm sad too :(**

**BPOV**

It's been about a week since_ he_ left. I can't think his name, let alone say it. Luckily, Charlie figured that one out fairly quickly. He's given me my space, which has consisted of me spending the last five days in my room. I've only left my sanctuary to get food or go to the bathroom. But I needed to go to school today.

It's not like I was behind in school or anything. I had pretty good grades actually, all thanks to my "tutoring sessions" with _him_ _before he left_. And Angela had dropped off all my homework from the past week. But Charlie was starting to hover, something I never thought I'd see. I must look worse than I thought.

Charlie had already called Renee to give her a heads up about my "state." I didn't need to deal with both of them right now. Actually I am certain I can't deal with them both right now.

I went to the bathroom to brush my teeth and ended up throwing up for the sixth day in a row. That's what I get for thinking of _him_; I really need to stop that. I brushed my teeth again and pulled my hair back in a ponytail. I should've washed it, but honestly… who am I trying to impress?

I took off my old sweatshirt I was sleeping in and put on a bra. I grabbed an old flannel shirt and buttoned it down. I grabbed a pair of jeans and pulled them on while staring out my now locked window.

_What the hell?_ They wouldn't close. Okay weird, they fit perfectly the last time I wore them. If anything they should fit looser since I've been so sick the last few days. Lord knows I wasn't keeping much down. I figured I would need a belt if anything.

I couldn't seem to find it in me to care too much after the initial shock wore off; I probably just shrunk them in the laundry or something. I grabbed a pair of jogging pants. I think they matched my shirt; but again, who was I trying to impress?

After grabbing a granola bar and my jacket, I got into my truck and drove to school. Charlie was more than relieved.

I stumbled out of my truck. _Why does the door have to get stuck today? Tomorrow after the gossip is down a bit would have been better._ I'm not that lucky. I could feel all the stares, glares, and curious glances.

They all knew. They all knew _he_ left. They all knew _he_ broke up with me. They all knew I got lost in the woods trying to find _him_. They all knew I was pathetic.

"There she is, I told you she couldn't skip for too long." Big surprise; Jessica.

"Well truancy is a crime and her dad is the chief, she can't be above the law!" Of course Lauren was right on the "Bash Bella" train.

"Guys, give her a break… she's probably having a hard time." I really need to put an effort into being more appreciative of Angela.

Of course, Jess and Lauren just kept going. "I heard she was on suicide watch after the incident in the woods." "Well that's stupid, he broke up with her. She should have seen it coming," _I guess that's the truth._ "True, this is Edward Cullen were talking about. He never even paid attention to anyone till she came along… and she's just an average girl." "Average, please. She's plain. She's a klutz and she was so not worthy of him. She can't blame him for finally figuring that out. I heard he left after his family, he probably would have stayed if she was good enough." _So they all knew I wasn't worthy either… why was _he_ the last to figure that one out? And why the hell couldn't he figure that out before we had sex? That just makes it harder right now._

"Guys, STOP!" Both Jess and Lauren just stared at Angela. "She's going through a tough time, I'm sure. But she is a good person and she loved him. If you have to gossip, find a bathroom or something. And give her some credit, Bella would never consider suicide!"

I was not the only one stunned. Jess and Lauren looked completely shocked by her proclamation. Honestly, I wasn't just stunned, I was touched. No one stuck up for me like that except for _him_, or at least _he used to_. And seriously, suicide… no way! Life sucks now without _him_ and all but there is NO way I would EVER consider that as an option.

I walked into the first class; I don't remember what my teacher talked about. Actually I don't remember which teacher or class it was. All my classes that morning went by in a haze. I was there, but not mentally. Mentally, I was still in my room lying across my bed thinking about all the things I wouldn't do again because they reminded me of _him_.

I came out of my personal bubble to realize I was headed to lunch. Routine was too inertly grounded within me, I wouldn't have noticed except for the fact that I ran into two people waiting in the lunch line. Immediately I wanted to just die.

I would need to eat something but that wasn't what I was dreading. I would have to sit somewhere. And the stares I was already getting from my usual lunch table was unnerving. Mike looked wary, but excited. If he makes a move, I may stab him… or fall apart. All the girls, except Angela were there, gossiping.

I was trying to think of excuses to not be here, but it was raining hard and there were other classes going on. There was no where to hide. That's when my stomach felt like it was being twisted into a gourmet pretzel. I lurched out of line and walked briskly, but carefully to the bathroom.

Once in there, I ran to the handicapped bathroom and threw up yet again. I barely had time to shut the door before I was positioned in front of the toilet for the next five minutes.

_What is this; it can't just be _him_, can it?_ I thought about the last week's events, minus _him_. That's when it hit me. _I should have started my period at least three days ago, but… no, NO!_

It wasn't possible, I couldn't be… there was no way I could possible be… It's just a coincidence. My hand flew to my stomach without my permission and there was a bump. A bump I couldn't remember having, I wasn't even sure if it was there this morning or not.

I felt a nudge from the bump, and slid down the door I was leaning against. Rationality kicked in telling me even if I was pregnant there was no way I could feel it kick. I was maybe a few weeks at the most. There was no way. My brain starting going through other possibilities.

_Alien abduction? _Doubtful, although vampires do exist. _Parasite?_ From where? The woods, that wouldn't make my stomach move on its own. _Cancer?_ I wasn't that lucky, I knew what this was. I just had no idea how it was possible.

It's _his_ baby. Vampire speed has something to do with his, I'm sure. Damn vampires.

The main door to the girls' room opened then. "Bella, you in here?" Angela questioned.

"Yeah, I'm… here," I replied as I opened the door. Sure I was here, but where was here again. I was having trouble understanding what was happening within my own body let alone outside it.

"Oh, you look… not good. Are you sick? Maybe you should go home for the day and try again tomorrow."

All I heard was go home. Home was where I needed to go. I could breakdown there, and hopefully figure out what was going on here. Charlie was at work till seven, he would find out I left but I didn't care. He still wouldn't be home till late, that gave me several hours to come to some conclusions.

Angela walked me to my truck. She offered me a ride but I didn't want to leave my truck or leave her stranded. Besides I needed to pick up a few things… one thing at least. Angela offered to bring my homework again but I told her I'd catch up tomorrow.

"Okay, well call if you need anything Bella. I'm sorry for the others…" I just mouthed thanks and drove away. I knew my destination; a small gas station about one mile from the county line. Charlie had no friends that worked there, or even shopped there. I walked in and got what I was after; a pregnancy test, a thirty dollar pregnancy test. I guess it was worth it for the insurance that Charlie wouldn't know.

I had been sitting on my bathroom floor for about three minutes now. Two more minutes and I would know for sure… maybe. I mean, there's always a chance that these things are wrong, right? And if I am pregnant, it's a vampire's child. What are the odds that a pregnancy test designed for humans would detect that kind of pregnancy?

That's when I realized it didn't matter. I knew I was pregnant. I could feel the nudging coming from my stomach as I was thinking. I keep finding myself stroking my bump absentmindedly. I stood up, looked at the test. Well, you learn something new everyday. Apparently, pregnancy tests, at least this one, could detect a vampire pregnancy. Super.

I walked to my room, with the evidence to hide, and walked to the old rocking chair. Somehow it seemed fitting to rock for a bit. I began stroking my bump again. It was hard, hard as concrete. Stupid vampires. This baby was growing fast, who knew when I'd give birth. Who knew how this baby would get out of me. Who knew how fast it would grow once it was out. Who knew if I would be around after it "clawed" its way out of me.

Oh my god. I can't tell Charlie, Renee, anyone.

I've got to leave. But how?

**A/N: Thank you so much to everyone who has favorited this story and signed up for alerts. Also thank you to msfrannyblack and Rebecca_Cullen_1991 for reviewing. I didn't expect any of this. I just had the story in my head, or at least pieces of the story, and wanted to write it down. The first chapter was so short; I didn't expect anyone to even read it. **

**But this chapter came too easily, I was shocked. There are several parts of the story I can't wait to write, although the next part, I'm not too excited about. Getting her away from Charlie is hard, but it will happen, I promise. I don't know when the next chapter will be up but I promise it will be up by Friday.**

**Thanks again, kmwhyte!**


	3. World Spins Madly On

**Disclaimer: I own nothing when it comes to Twilight. I know… I'm sad too!**

**BPOV**

Two hours, one bowl of Banana Nut Cheerios, and one trip to the bathroom to throw up my Cheerios and I still had no idea what to do.

There is no way I could stay with Charlie like this. He's not blind and since _he_ left, he's actually become more observant. Just because I didn't notice the bump doesn't mean that he won't. He solves crimes for crying out loud; granted they're small town crimes where teens steal a pack of cigarettes from the gas station or people scrap a car while parking and then drive away. But still, he's not slow.

I figured no matter the events that came from this pregnancy, I still only had three possible outcomes as best.

Outcome one; I died. I wasn't really sure I could actually live through this birth, let alone without Carlisle.

Outcome two; I give birth to super baby. This thing is growing so fast, so quick; there was practically no chance that he or she would be normal. Just look at the father. This baby had to be gifted.

Outcome three; I, somehow, had to become… immortal. _How?_ I have no idea. It's not like I could call a vampire for help anymore. But still, I knew I ultimately needed to be special to take care of my baby.

_My_ baby.

This baby was mine. I hadn't thought of that yet. I kept referring to it as _his_ baby, or a vampire baby. But it was just as much mine as it was _his_. Maybe even more so, since I would being take care of him or her. I rubbed small circles over my bump. Every few moments I feel a nudge letting me know that this baby cared for me too. I already loved it. I did from the moment I found out; that must have been why I was stroking my bump all afternoon.

I started thinking about my possible outcomes again; I didn't have a whole lot of time before Charlie would come home. I realized outcome two wasn't really a possibility, it was an absolute. My baby was special, just like its _daddy_. Calling _him,_ daddy make my heart not want to break as much.

So I was left with two possible outcomes, either I died or I lived forever. Surviving the birth human just didn't seem like a possibility.

I decided I couldn't think of that right now. I had more pressing matters.

_How am I going to leave Charlie?_ There was no way I could stay, and the one other place I could go was Renee's. Again, that wasn't an option. I couldn't go to her, for the same reasons I couldn't stay with Charlie.

I really couldn't picture Charlie letting my go anywhere with how I had been lately. Depressed daughter leaves to go live across the country, alone? Sure, I'm sure he'd go for that. Plus I'm still in school, not that that would last for much longer, but I needed a way for him not to know that.

_Maybe a boarding school would serve as a cover?_ It seemed perfect… too perfect. I mean school and housing built into one, all concerns would be halted right there. There had to be flaw. And unfortunately there were several.

For one, boarding schools have tuition. A police chief in Forks cannot afford one and technically I wouldn't actually need one. since I wouldn't actually be attending. Even a scholarship wouldn't ease that lie. Also, middle of the semester… like I said Charlie's not stupid.

Honestly the only place Charlie would let me go is Renee's. I knew he felt he was in over his head with my mental state right now; he'd probably welcome that conclusion. But I couldn't actually go there. Charlie would be able to relinquish control though. And I could probably have at least a good six months before he figured out I wasn't with her, if I told my lies correctly.

I would also have to convince Renee that I was fine, that she didn't need to check up on me, or call Charlie for answers.

I walked down the stairs and got some fish out of the freezer… and then put it back before slamming the door. That smell could not be allowed to linger in this house and it would if I cooked it. My stomach calmed and I decided meatloaf was safer. Charlie was a fan and it would definitely make him more agreeable tonight. I was going to have to lie a lot. Fantastic, I wasn't exactly worthy of awards when it came to acting.

***

Seven fifteen on the dot and I heard the cruiser pull up. _Here we go. Crap_. The little nudger pushed at me as the door opened.

"I know… I'm scared too." I whispered so soft Charlie couldn't have heard.

"Bell, are you here?"

"Yeah, I'm here. Dinner should be ready in about five minutes." I called.

He came in and just stared at me for a bit. I kept working, but it was making me more anxious and I didn't want to lose my nerve.

"Dad, what are staring at? Did you not want meatloaf, I thought-" He held up a hand to cut me off and opened his mouth to speak.

"No, no. I love meatloaf and it smells great! I just… I just didn't think you'd be up to cooking, I was gonna order pizza or something…"

"Thanks okay, I wanted to cook." He was already suspicious. I was going to have to really play along for awhile.

I set the table and then pulled out the meatloaf and vegetables I cooked. Charlie just sat there staring. My little nudger pushed me again and I really had to try NOT to rub my bump in response.

"Dad, the food's gonna get cold…"

"How was your day Bells? When I drove by the school, I didn't see your truck." Great, he checked up on me. I had no idea when he would have driven by so I couldn't really lie. If he caught the lie now, I would lose my confidence. And _we_ needed to leave.

"School was school. I got really sick during lunch; I think I might have eaten something bad or something. Angela suggested I go home. I figured that was probably best."

"You didn't sign out; I got a call from Ms. Cope."

Figures, I knew I forgot something. But in my defense I was a bit distracted by the thing growing inside of me. Yet, I couldn't claim that as an excuse. "I forgot, sorry."

"Well please don't let it happen again, ever since… last week it makes me nervous when I don't know where you are."

"Okay, I am sorry Dad. But I actually started thinking when I got home…" I paused, I was terrified of his reaction but it was now or never. "I think I'm gonna move back with Mom and Phil for a while."

He blinked a few times and his face turned whiter before he decided to speak. "Well… Bell if that's what you think you should do, I guess… I can understand that. Are you sure you don't wanna wait till school is over or do you really need to leave after this semester." I didn't miss the presumption. He was hoping I would stay till winter break. Crap.

"Actually Dad. I was gonna leave sooner, like tomorrow. They have a few days off this week because of build-in hurricane days and I just figured this way I wouldn't miss too much."

"Why so soon though, Bell? I'm really gonna miss you. Why don't you think about it for a while?"

"I have thought about it Dad. And I'm gonna miss you too, more than you know. I can't even thank you enough for letting me live here." He started to open his mouth but I stopped him. I needed to say all this if I wasn't going to see him anytime soon, maybe even ever. "I don't want to leave you, but I just need a different place for a while, to get away from all… this stuff. I'll call, I promise!"

He sat there for several minutes just thinking and staring. I was getting so nervous. _He didn't buy it. He's not going to let me leave. He'll call Renee and then I'm screwed-_

Charlie interrupted my internal freak-out with a calm voice. "Okay Bells, I guess since you're going to your mom's, its okay. I'm really going to miss you though, the food is going to suck without you, but I'll survive. When exactly are you leaving?"

"Uh, tomorrow morning, the school is off till Monday, so it gives me enough time to drive there." I couldn't believe he bought it, thank goodness for my research on the Jacksonville school district website. Hurricane days, who knew? Then I saw his face… uh oh.

"You're gonna drive, your truck, to Jacksonville?!" I guess that was unrealistic, but I couldn't back-out now. I would need my truck to go anywhere.

"I'm going to try; if it breaks down, I'll fly the rest of the way. I really love my truck. Plus you gave it to me; I don't want to leave it…" He simply nodded. I played the mushy card and he just let it rest. Thank goodness.

I cleaned up the kitchen and went upstairs to pack. I also needed to call Renee.

***

"Bella? Oh my, honey, how are you? I was actually expecting Charlie to call." I could tell she was hesitant to say anything else.

"Yeah, well I figured it has been long enough since I called you last. How are you and Phil doing?" I didn't want to arouse suspicion by jumping the gun and telling her I was totally fine. But she wasn't having any of it.

"Oh we're fine… a little worried about you. How are you doing baby?"

"I'm… doing a lot better" Truthfully I was. I was still in pain over _him_, but I suddenly had something more important to think about. I started rubbing circles over my bump again as I continued. "I can't really spend any more time dwelling on it now. Besides, my girlfriends are being really great." She had no idea how much that wasn't true. She still thought Jess was one of my best friends. Although, in truth Angela had been great; she was just the only one.

"Oh honey, that's good! I'm glad; you seem to sound worlds better. I had a feeling Charlie was overreacting." Good she brought it. Although I wasn't exactly sure if I was happy about that. Part of me wanted my mom to know that I was having a baby, I could have really used her help, but that wasn't an option.

We continued to talk about school and friends, but not _him_. I truly believe she was convinced. So after we hung up I started packing. Mostly I just packed clothes and books. I had no desire for my music but I did grab a few CDs and my CD player. I also took my letters from my mom and all my other necessities.

I loaded my truck in the middle of the night while Charlie slept. I couldn't sleep, and I didn't want to waste time. It was going to be hard enough tomorrow morning when I had to say goodbye to him.

**A/N: I really didn't think I was going to finish this chapter that quickly. Mainly because I had no clue how to get Bella to leave Charlie, but once I figured that out, it just wrote itself. **

**In my original notes, I actually had Bella doing more which consisted of what she does next, after she leaves Charlie but the chapter was long enough, so I'll save that for chapter 4. It should be long too. And again, it's one of those events I have seen from the beginning and can't wait to write, so it should be up in a few days. Sorry to spoil you all with daily updates, that can't last any longer, sorry!**

**Thanks for all the reviews, especially from Rexanne. You all can thank her for my nearly-instant update. Her praise really inspired me to update so soon.**

**Till next time, Read and Review! - kmwhyte**


	4. Wish You Were

**Disclaimer: I own nothing when it comes to Twilight. I know… I'm sad too!**

**APOV (Alice)**

_I am NOT happy, Edward Cullen!_

"Neither am I, Alice," Edward stated simply as he walked out the back door.

I heard him start to run off towards Montreal. We were living in a small town in Vermont called Richfort, but our house was so close to the border, it wouldn't take more than about fifteen minutes for Edward to reach Canada and begin the hunt he was determined to distract himself with.

I swear my brother could be so stupid and masochistic. He didn't want to leave Bella, and he never should have. I know it's killing him. Idiot!

I sat there on our white couch, it was so similar to the one we had in Forks, you'd think it was the same one. But we just bought new stuff when we got here. We didn't have time to really pack much, since Edward had rushed us to move so forcefully and we just couldn't change our preferences in décor.

I had been sitting here for the past four hours with my legs crossed and arms folding glaring anytime Edward walked by. I had no intention to let him think he did the right thing by Bella, unlike the rest of them. It's not that they agreed with him but they were willing to just ignore the fact for Edward's sake. Not me, I was fully intent on letting him know he was a complete dumbass for leaving her.

Jasper could feel my conviction and came to sit by me. He knew I was not going to listen to whatever he had to say, but still, he felt better to sit by me than to busy himself with the rest of the family. Now that Edward had left, the rest of them had let their thoughts and emotions drift to Bella.

Poor Jasper, all the grief and guilt was killing him. Even Rosalie was feeling bad for Bella, although she was also feeling an obscene amount of relief for both Bella and our family. I swear, I may have to rip her arm off and beat her with it if she tells Edward he did the right one more time…

Jasper tensed around me then, he knew I was having a vision and that I wouldn't respond so he just tightened his grip on my shoulder to let me know he was there.

I was seeing Bella, she was reading the note I left for her. She said my name and dropped the note suddenly… and then it was all gone.

Bella had become so blurry after her birthday and I had no idea why. Now it seemed I wasn't getting a clear read on her as well, just glimpses. I rarely saw anything except her face anymore.

I had had two visions of her before Edward had us leave and I am not thinking about them because of anticipation of his reactions. I saw he wouldn't take it well. He would hate the fact that I left a note for Bella; in fact, he would probably try to get the note back before she could find it. I can't let him do that. Bella needs what I left her… I don't why, but she does. Damn visions.

**BPOV**

Charlie had to leave for work by nine. I figured I would give myself a head start since I really didn't know where I was going. I made us breakfast and packed some food for myself for the road. I still couldn't keep anything down, but I also didn't know when I would be able to eat either.

I was ready to go by 8:30. Charlie tried to stall me.

"Why don't you leave this afternoon, I heard you working last night. You probably didn't enough sleep. And I don't want you falling asleep at the wheel."

If he thought that was my biggest problem…

"I'll be fine Dad. Don't worry, I have a list of hotels along the way and the first is only about seven hours from here. I'll call you in a couple days and let you know how the truck is holding up." Lying was starting to come out a lot easier.

I was wearing lose clothes, since nothing fit, and my bulky jacket. When I went to hug Charlie goodbye, I held my stomach back. He would definitely notice the concrete rock growing inside me.

"Bye Bells, Drive safely, I'll miss you!" Charlie called after me as I waved from the front cab.

I started headed Northeast, not really paying attention. I still had no idea where to go, so it didn't really matter. I was just trying to head out of Forks. I passed the Calawah River; I can't remember the last time I drove by that without it raining. I barely noticed the houses I passed.

I didn't even notice where I was at first, but I knew the truck had stopped. I didn't remember turning into the ferns. I didn't remember turning down the winding road. I do remember that went I came to a stop; I got nudged from my sidekick. Apparently, I needed to use a bathroom.

The house looked exactly the same. No overgrown trees or brushes and no paint flakes falling off the front door like I imagined. It looked just as pristine as the last time I was here.

There really was no stopping me when it came to going inside. Mostly because it wasn't my decision, I needed their bathroom, and I knew where Esme used to hide an extra key.

It wasn't under the welcome mat, or the eave, or even under a potted plant. Way too human for them. No, Esme hid the key in a bush, her now-dormant poinsettia plant. Tied to the base, inside of all the branches, was the house key. I unlocked the door and ran to the bathroom right behind the kitchen.

I took my time washing my hands; this was not a place I really wanted to be. I wasn't even sure why I was here. I walked out slowly. The house looked too much the same. Only a few pieces were gone that I noticed while walking around the first floor. Some empty spots were on the wall, where artwork and pictures used to hang. I noticed the dining room table, they never used, was gone as well. But other than a few other antique pieces that I knew Esme loved, everything was the same, except for the plastic sheets covering ever piece of cloth furniture.

_So they really didn't need this stuff. They had no problem leaving it behind… just like me._ Before I knew it I was headed to second floor. I stopped myself before I reached the next flight of stairs. I couldn't go to _his_ room, not now. Instead I wandered into Alice and Jasper's room.

I never actually spent any time in here. I think I felt awkward since it was their shared room. I probably wouldn't have cared if it was just Alice's. Besides, we rarely left the living room, or _his_ room, when I was around.

I was surprised how different the room was compared to how I had envisioned it. I imagined something similar to _his_. Basic colors; maybe browns, blacks, and whites. I obviously, pictured a bed; just because they didn't sleep, didn't mean they didn't have a use for it. I figured there would be fashion magazines and civil war memorabilia scattered everywhere. Possibly a computer desk, since Alice always had something to plan.

But it was bright, full of happy colors; reds, and blues, and greens. There was a bed, and it had the most beautiful soft green bedspread on it. There were a dozen oversized pillows that took up half the bed at least. There was a bed side table on each side. It was obvious which side was which. Alice's had a picture of the family, including me, and a copy of the Teen Vogue's prom issue. There was also a notebook full of sketches. Jasper's side was spotless except for the picture of Alice in a frame I'm sure she picked out. Gold with tiny hearts all over it wasn't exactly his style. Still, I'm sure he loved it.

The room was practically bare besides the bed and tables. That's when I saw it, Double doors, cracked barely an inch apart.

_Alice's holy grail, ha ha._ Her closet. It stretched out in front of me and was probably the size of two of her bedrooms. _Actually, it probably was another bedroom, she must have made Esme demolish the wall_. Even though it was obvious that she had taken clothes with her when they left, she still left the closet more than half full. I walked by touching all the fabric, reveling in the scent of my lost sister.

In the last section of her closet near a window was something I didn't expect. _Closets don't have windows; she must have turned into a closet from a bedroom._ There was a huge trunk, not that unusual, with an envelope on top addressed to me, that's unusual.

_It's her handwriting. But why would she leave me a note here. I didn't know I was coming her till I drove up. I don't know if I want to read this…_

If it had been from _him_, I probably would have turned around and left. Maybe. I 'm sure I wouldn't want to hear that _he_ didn't want me, but who am I kidding, I am a curious person. How else would you explain me following _him_ around when he kept telling me he was dangerous.

I never had a reason to not trust Alice, and I'm sure she only left without a goodbye because of _him_. So what do I have to lose? I opened the letter and began to read.

_Bella,_

_I'm so sorry that my brother can be such an idiot. Scratch that, he's a complete dumbass for leaving you. Believe me when I tell you, he will regret it. In fact, he already does, he just won't admit it yet._

_I'm not sure if you'll find this note. I'm about 86% positive you will. I know, uncertainty is a rarity for me. But I'm having difficulty seeing you now. I have no idea why and I'm not allowed to talk, or think, about you right now so I can't discuss the possible reasons._

_But I am seeing glimpses. Very confusing for me, mind you. First I see that we will meet again. But I have no idea when or where._

_Second, I see that you need my help. Or rather, you need things I can provide. I don't know why you need this stuff, but you know I'd do anything for you. So here is you're big box of goodies!_

_I know you'll need money too so I left some petty cash at the bottom. But in case you get into real trouble, there's a credit card too. I know you will never use it. I don't need my visions to tell me that. But if you ever get into trouble or need me, use it! I'll find you, I promise. And don't worry; he doesn't know any of this. None of then do._

_I don't know why you'll need this stuff but I know you'll be okay somehow. I'm sorry I didn't say goodbye. Remember you ARE my sister._

_Alice_

_By the way, blood's in the fridge. Why you need that, I'll never know!_

"Oh, Alice." I felt my nudger push against me again and dropped the note. I almost forgot about him. How could I? "It's okay, we're okay. Auntie Alice is gonna help, I guess." I laughed as I lifted the lid of the trunk. _Why would I need blood?_

The trunk was completely stuffed. On top were countless pairs of lounge pants and jogging suits. I'm surprised she actually approved of this. She would never let me wear this stuff before. I pulled out each piece and examined it. At least I could make due with this stuff; I was running out of pants that fit me. Under the pants, was a copy of Romero and Juliet. _Why would I need this, I have a copy._ I opened it up and saw my name in the left corner right next to the binding. _It was my copy_. I must have left it here one day. Under that was a CD. It looked like _his_, like the one _he_ gave me and then took back. I pushed it to the side, I couldn't think of that right now.

I saw the credit card and pulled it out next. _She's right, I'll never use this_. But it was nice to have the option to see Alice again. There was a folder standing on the inside of the trunk. When I opened it, I was shocked. _So this is how they live in the world._ There were several blank legal documents, along with several copies of each. Passports, licenses, birth certificate, death certificates; they were all there, just waiting for a picture and some personal information. _Does she really not know why I would need this stuff? Cause I'm drawing a blank here…_

I saw a couple of keys on the bottom as well. One was antique looking, like one you would find to open a castle. It had curves and circles throughout the top. I had no idea what it was for, but then again, I wasn't sure what a lot of this was for. The other key was easy identifiable. It was a car key with the logo of BMW on it. _Okay, I don't think I'm using this key._

I saved the cash for last; I knew it wasn't going to be a small amount. And from the looks of it, I wasn't wrong. I picked up the bundle only to realize, it was twice the size I thought it was. And the majority of it was large bills. I was hoping for ones and fives, not hundreds. I counted it twice, I had to be wrong. _Oh my god! Seriously?_ Three hundred and fifty thousand dollars. _Three hundred and fifty thousand dollars?_ _This is not petty cash! Then again, I guess anything less than five hundred thousand was nothing to the Cullens. _I put everything back in the box and flipped the latch to close it. _Oh my god…_

**A/N: Thank you all again for reviewing and adding me to your favorites. It's way too flattering. I'm sorry this chapter didn't make an appearance yesterday. It was done but I'm a little stuck for the next one. I know what I want to happen; I'm just not sure how to make it be.**

**With that said, I want to clear up a few things that I'm not sure I have conveyed yet in the POVs. Normally I'd keep you guessing, but I don't want anyone to hate a character without all the facts.**

**First, Alice doesn't know Bella is pregnant, she doesn't even know her and Edward had sex. Impulse decision and all, plus she can't see the baby.**

**Second, Edward doesn't know Bella is pregnant. Hopefully you got that. I really don't believe he would have left if he knew. **

**Also, I'm sorry but it will be at least Monday or Tuesday before Chapter 5 comes out. I'll be out of town, but I will be taking notes to get it out ASAP. Okay, I think that's it for now. Any questions, ask and I'll try and answer. Please Review, I wanna know what you all like :)**

**~kmwhyte**


	5. Nothing Ever Hurt Like You

**Disclaimer: I own nothing when it comes to Twilight. I know… I'm sad too!**

**BPOV **

I woke up surrounded by soft green pillows. _I guess the "few minutes to think" turned into a nap… whoops._ I looked for a clock but there was nothing in the room of the sort. _Vampires probably don't need them… either that or they just wear watches_. I pulled out my cell phone and saw it was 1:23 am.

_Oh, not a nap, more like a coma…_

The baby must have decided it was time for me to awake, because my stomach was getting nudged about every minute. After I went to bathroom, I started to descend the stairs.

I was really getting hungry since I hadn't eaten anything since I left Charlie's; that already felt like a lifetime ago. But I wasn't in a regular home where people eat food all the time to survive. I was at the Cullen's, and they weren't even here to fake being human with their props.

I still headed to the kitchen, at the very least I could get a drink of water. My throat was feeling dry. I don't remember the last time it felt like that; like I hadn't drunken anything in days.

After four glasses, my throat still felt unquenched, but I really didn't want to keep drinking. I would have to make multiple stops to the restroom now anyways.

I started opening up cabinets and drawers, mainly out of curiosity. I figured it was impolite to snoop, but they were gone. They left me, why should I care about common courtesy now? All the dishes and silverware were accounted for. _I guess that makes sense, they don't use them anyways._

I walked over to the pantry and opened the door._ Holy crow! FOOD!_ The entire pantry was full of food. Cereal, canned soup, cake mixes, bread, peanut butter and jelly, canned vegetables. It was full of all the instant food I loved for when I used to come over so Ed-

So _he _didn't have to take me home for meals. _Damn, that was close; almost thought his name._

I grabbed a can of chicken noodle. Comfort food sounded good right about now. I watched it heat in the microwave. I had no patience for the stove right now, _quick and radioactive please_.

I started remembering the letter and what Alice wrote, "_Blood's in the fridge. Why you need that, I'll never know._" _And she expected me to know?_ I opened the fridge and there was a ton of blood in plastic bags, the kind hospitals use. There had to be about thirty or forty bags. It completely filled the fridge, except for the one tiny spot in the door that had a half gallon of milk that was expiring in a few days. _What could I use that much blood for?! Alice has lost it this time._

I shut the fridge door and went to retrieve my soup. After the first few bites, my belly stopped doing flips. I hadn't even realized it was so constant till it stopped. _Hungry too, huh?_ I rubbed my bump while I ate my soup. Afterwards, I washed the bowl and spoon with water. I figured it was too late to actually go anywhere… plus I had no idea where to go.

I knew I couldn't stay here forever, but a few days couldn't hurt, right? I mean it was only my heart that would break when I actually left this place, when I left the rest of _him_ behind. But my heartache wasn't as devastating since I realized I was pregnant. It was like I had a reason to keep going now. I was still miserable, and I missed _him_. But I couldn't hate _him_ when _he_gave me my little nudger, could I? I needed to be strong for this baby. I would love _him_ and our baby forever, whether _he_ wanted me or not.

I hadn't even realized I was walking, let alone walking up the stairs. I was standing in front of _his_ door, and I was absolutely frozen.

_I… I don't know. Do I wanna see what it looks like now? Would it be better or worse if everything was the same?_

I couldn't answer my own question because I had no idea. It would hurt if everything had vanished, because then it would be like _he_ really was gone, and never coming back. But if everything was there, then it was like _he_ didn't want the stuff, just like _he _didn't want me._ But I wanted _him_… I still want _him_. _He_ should be here…_

And _he_ should. _He_ should know he's a father. Just because you're not in love with the mother, doesn't make you uninvolved.

But _he_ had no clue I was a mother, just like _he_ didn't know _he_ was father. I couldn't blame _him_ for not knowing, could I?

_Go in or not?_ That was the question. All my stalling was really changing it. A nudge put my hand on the doorknob. _Okay, we'll go in…_

It was exactly the same.

All the books, CDs… they were all there. The couch and carpet looked like they were just waiting for _him_ to come home and need comfort. It was like _he_ never left.

Of course, that wasn't true.

I sat on that couch for at least a few hours, but it felt like days. I just stared around the room. There were no gaps in the shelves. Every CD and book was there. He_ didn't need, or want, any of them?! _He_ loved music and _he_ loved _his_ books._ I was dumbfounded.

I couldn't sit there anymore. It was just too painful. I wandered around the house some more and found myself in front of Rose and Emmett's room. Another room I did not frequent, but for a completely different set of reasons. For one, Rose hated me; and I wasn't to keen on her either since she didn't attempt to hide her feelings. Second, I had no desire to accidentally witness their activities. The jokes Emmett told were about all I could take on the subject. And third, why would I spend time with them in here, when I had _him_?

All of those reasons were stupid. Especially the third. At least now…

I walked inside, politeness be damned, what was Rosalie gonna do to me now?

The room looked like how I expected Alice's room to look. The colors varied in whites and browns with some blue pillows on the bed to add some color. The color scheme was very simple and pure. I should have been surprised, but I wasn't. Somehow I always figured that Rose liked simple things when it came right down to it. She just lived up to people's expectations, hence the flashy clothes and car.

The only things left in the room were a bed and a metal trash can, which was filled with crumbled pieces of paper and something else. It looked like a frame, so I went to pick it up. It was a family photo, the same one that was in Alice's room. _She had a family photo, with me, in her room? Why?_ There were no mustaches or black eyes drawn over me, like I would have expected.

I put the frame back in the trash can. Searching their house was only leading to more questions.

I went down the hall to Carlisle's study. His room was the one with the most missing pieces. The art work was gone, which wasn't surprising since it was basically his history. His desk was gone too; it was antique so he probably couldn't bear to part with it. The only thing left was a wide filing cabinet. It was styled in the same way his desk used to be but obviously more modern. _Probably custom made to match the desk…_ I walked over to the piece of furniture. When I tried to open it, it wouldn't budge, and then I noticed the keyhole. It looked familiar… _the key!_

I ran to Alice's room and pulled everything out of the trunk looking for the antique-looking key she left. Once I found it, I ran back to Carlisle's study. I wasn't sure what I was hoping to find, Alice certainly wasn't giving me much to work with. But I had faith that something would come from being here, in their house, that would let me know what to do.

I inserted the key. _I knew it!_ It was absolutely for the filing cabinet. I turned the key and opened the first drawer. There were just empty files with random names, none of which I recognized. The second drawer had medical supplies, scalpels, needles, IVs, and a lot of stuff I didn't recognize.

The last drawer was next and I suddenly felt a nudge. _I know, we'll eat soon…_ I opened the drawer and saw several metal syringes. _What the hell?_ I picked one up and saw the titanium imprint. _That seems unnecessary. _I turned the syringe over so I could read the label; _Jasper._

I picked up the next one;_ Rosalie_. They all had their names on them. _Alice, Emmett, Esme, Carlisle … him. What are these?_

There was a sticky note under the forth syringe, it simply said one word; _Venom_. _As in their venom? As in what spreads when they bite you?_ _Oh my god._ That was it, that was my answer.

But still, it only led to more questions…

**A/N: Thank you to all those of you who reviewed. I've been on cloud nine with all the reviews and favorite alerts being sent for my story. I decided to post this early since I found an internet connection, YAY!**

**I hope you all enjoy this chapter. I know it's a bit boring with no dialogue or interaction with other characters, but it will change soon, I just need to get to a certain point. I hate unanswered questions and that would be what I would leave you all with if I don't write chapters like this. I have the next fifteen chapters planned with VERY vague notes, so don't worry I do have a plan.**

**BTW, a lot of you are really hoping for Alice to come back and help Bella some more. I love that idea, but I do have another one. I would change it, but I love where I'm taking the story and part of that is what I'm having Alice do. So relax, you'll see her again. In fact I may add another Alice POV. I love writing for her.**

**Have Questions – Ask and as always, Review. I love to know what you like or dislike.**

**~kmwhyte**


	6. What Can I Say

**Disclaimer: I own nothing when it comes to Twilight. I know… I'm sad too!**

**BPOV (**_**3 weeks later**_**)**

_Why isn't this grossing me out?_ I was finishing my second blood bag of the morning. I had been drinking blood for the past week and a half and I was barely thinking about it anymore.

At first, I was horrified that the red liquid looked… tempting. I wasn't sure why Alice left me blood, I was actually starting to think that maybe it was there in case I lost too much blood giving birth; but did she think I'd be able to handle that myself?

***Flashback***

I spend twenty minutes staring at the first bag I took out of the fridge just contemplating the reasons the blood was alluring to my senses. It smelled… tasty. It still had the smell of salt and rust but it didn't turn my stomach as much. But it still looked like blood. I felt a nudge. _Oh, this is what you need...? Do I have too?_ Another nudge._ Okay, hint taken._

I poured it into a blue ceramic mug, large enough to hold an entire can of soup. But the baby didn't want soup. The baby didn't want any "human" food. In fact, the baby was pretty stubborn about that; anytime I even had one bite of human food, I threw up.

I thought about heating the blood up… but that just seemed way too weird. _Does it really matter? Either way, I'm drinking _blood_. But… if it will help the baby…_

I took one sip, if you can call it that, and then followed with a large gulp. It didn't taste bad, maybe a little salty. I held my nose, so I couldn't smell it and that seemed to really help. I drank the whole mug in ten minutes and felt my baby doing twists and flips in my stomach. "I think we need to learn to communicate better; we could have saved some time if I had known that all you wanted was blood."

***End Flashback***

I really didn't care about the smell anymore. It was like the baby was in charge of my senses, overpowering them so I could get him or her what he or she needed.

I had gained quite a belly in the past three weeks. I probably looked like I was in my eighth or ninth month. I knew the baby would be coming soon and I had a plan.

Unfortunately, I needed help with my plan. I was pretty confident that I could take care of myself but I wouldn't be able to take care of my little nudger during that time.

I had been going threw my options over the last two days.

Charlie and Renee weren't even on my list to be considered. I had been talking to them about every three or four days to keep them from becoming suspicious. But beyond my phone communication, I really couldn't contact them anymore, probably ever.

Jacob Black was a good kid but I didn't really know him too well. Plus, he would definitely get suspicious since he was fully aware of the legends concerning the Cullens. Whether he believed them or not probably wouldn't matter when he saw me drinking blood. He would probably just end up telling Billy, and then Charlie would know too. He wasn't an option.

My friends from Forks were human and needed to be left in the dark for their own safety. _And it's not like Jessica Stanley can be trusted with a secret._

I could use the credit card that Alice gave me. I knew she would come back and help, she promised to. But…

_I don't think I want her to know._ She'd tell _him_. Even if she didn't want to, she couldn't keep it from _him_ for long with _his stupid power_. No, there has to be someone else…

I started going through my cell phone menu.

Black, Billy – _He's practically the chief of the tribe, not a choice._

Black, Jacob – _I don't know him well enough._

Cheney, Ben – _Definitely don't know him well enough._

Clearwater's –_ Charlie's friends, yeah right._

Crowley, Tyler – _No way._

Dwyer, Phil – _Nope._

Dwyer, Renee – _Like I said, no._

Cullen Home – _Well, I'm here already and I'm the only one here, so that's no help._

Forks Home – _Charlie, that's a no._

Forks Police Station – _Again, Charlie can't know._

Jacksonville Home –_ Mom, no._

Mallory, Lauren – _Ha!_

Newton, Mike – _He'd never leave, I'd be stuck with him forever._

Stanley, Jess – _The whole town would know before the baby was even out._

Swan, Charlie – _No Charlie._

Weber, Angela - …

I didn't even get to the last name, Eric Yorkie. _Angela is my only option._

_She would never tell anyone. She could take care of my baby for a few days, she has siblings. But can I ask that of her? _

I didn't have a whole lot of other options, in fact, she was it. _I could at least ask._

***

_Ring._

_Ring._

_Ring._

"Hello?" Angela's quiet voice was tentative; she probably didn't expect to hear from me.

"Angela, hey, it's Bella."

"Wow, hey Bella. How… are you?" _This is going to be difficult, she's already suspicious._

"I'm… pretty okay. Um, I hate to call just to ask you something but… I need a favor."

"…"

"Angela?" _Did I lose her? Or did she hang up on me?_

"…I'm here. I just… I don't know how I can help you, you moved to Florida right?"

"Not exactly, I'm still in Forks, kinda." The Cullens' house was technically out of Forks' city limits. "Could you meet me somewhere?"

"Okay, where do you want to meet?" _Thank god!_

"Do you remember where the Cullens' lived?" She gasped; I guess that was worth a gasp. I was still a little stumped myself.

"Yeah. When do you want me to come?"

"The sooner the better. And Angela can you… not tell anyone. Especially Lauren and Jess." I guess I was just asking for favor after favor now.

"Sure, I wouldn't tell them anyways. I'll come by in about an hour, okay?"

"That's great, thanks Angela."

"Bye Bella."

"Bye."

***

I sat on the white couch waiting for Angela to come. I had taken off the plastic sheets awhile ago. I was wearing a pair of lime green drawstring pants and a large Arizona sweatshirt that hid my belly a bit with its baggy-ness.

I was so anxious; I just kept picturing Angela seeing my belly and running away screaming. Maybe she would have the reaction _he_ was so sure that I should have had when I learned the truth about vampires. But I wasn't going to tell her anything about vampires. I didn't want to put her life in danger or fill her mind with fear. If I could have called anyone else, I would have. I didn't want-.

_Knock – knock._

I felt the baby jump from the sound, just like me. _Okay, now or never…_

"Bella?" She seemed hesitant and maybe… curious. _Oh, just wait…_

"Come on in Angela."

She walked in and sat on the other side of the couch. She couldn't see me belly with the angle I was sitting at; plus I had a pillow on my lap.

"Bella, you still look a little sick, are you okay?"

"Actually, I'm a little more than sick, Angela. Please… please hear me out and… don't freak, okay?"

"Okay…" I stood up and she was already widening her eyes. I lifted up my sweatshirt so she could see my belly. She gasped once; I'm sure because she realized I was pregnant. Then she gasped again; I had a lot of bruises from the baby kicking and nudging me, she was probably concerned. The third gasp signaled that she was putting it all together. "… Bella, you're… you're… oh my…"

I sat back down covering my belly with my sweatshirt again. "Yeah, I'm pregnant."

"Wow, but I just saw you like three weeks ago… You didn't have _that_ then!"

"Not the belly, no. But I was pregnant; I just didn't know it yet. Well, actually I figured it out that day but…" I was getting distracted and I needed to focus. "I know this is a lot, and I wouldn't have dragged you in this if I had anyone else, but I need your help."

"No one knows? Not even your dad?"

"No, I… I can't tell him."

"How are you _this_ pregnant?"

"I can't really explain that to you. I'm not too clear on that myself. I think it's better if you don't know everything though. I didn't want to bring you into this world, but I don't have anyone else…"

"Is it… I mean… it's… it's _his_, right?"

_Do I look like a girl who is going to sleep around?_ "Yeah, it's _his_." I started rubbing my belly; it had become habit that anytime I was thinking of _him_, I would start stroking my belly.

"Does _he_… does _he_ know?" She seemed a little mad. She was probably accusing him of ditching when he found out.

"No, I didn't know until after _he_ left."

"Wow." She was in shock, but at least she wasn't running. "What… what can I do?" Relief washed over my entire body as I relaxed at her question.

"Thank you Angela. I know I'm going to have this baby soon, real soon. And I'm going to be… going through some things for a few days. I can't take care of the baby during that time. I was hoping, that maybe, you could just watch him or her for a few days for me. I promise I wouldn't ask if I had any other options-" I was beginning to panic when Angela shook her head yes.

"Sure. I can do that."

"Thank you!" I leaned over to hug her. It was probably the first time I had ever hugged Angela but I didn't care. "You have no idea how much this means to me, how much this helps me."

"Its fine Bella, don't worry. I'll take care of- Is it a boy or girl?"

"I'm not sure. I can't really go to a doctor." We both laughed without humor for that comment. "Sometimes I think it's a girl but then I think it's a boy other times. I guess I'll find out soon enough, but it definitely has a LOT of personality."

"… Any ideas for names? I don't really wanna call it "baby" or "little one" for a few days if you got an alternative." She was taking it well, but I could see the panic in her eyes. She was probably processing the supernatural possibilities since I seemed to full-term after only three weeks. All her words were choppy, like her brain was on a time delay, but still she wasn't running away. She was trying to help.

"I'm not sure. I was thinking of Renesmee for a girl. It's a combination of my mother's name and _his_ mother's name."

"That's really pretty. What about for a boy?"

"That, I'm having a bit of a hard time with. I'm split between naming him after his _father_ or my father. I'm not sure. I just don't know if I can bear to call the name, Edward, for his entire life." _Especially if my baby is going to live forever!_ I added in my head. I was having an easier time saying _his_ name, especially if it was associated with the baby, but still. _His_ name would always remind me of _him_.

"So, 'Charlie' or 'Edward'? They're both good names…"

"Yeah, they are… Maybe I can use them both, middle names or some- Ahhhh!" _Oh my god!_ I felt tearing to a degree that rivaled vampire venom in my system.

"Bella?!"

**A/N: THANK YOU to EVERYONE who has reviewed and favorited. I had over sixty alerts within twelve hours of posting Chapter Five. I was SUPER excited!**

**Also, FYI, I changed a few of the chapter titles because I wanted to name them after songs. Clearly, I have too much time on my hands. I put references on my profile in case you're interested.**

**Now, here are a few of the questions that I got asked that I will try to answer.**

**Why did Alice think to leave the Venom? **_**Alice didn't know about the venom per say. She knew Bella needed the key to the cabinet but didn't know why. She saw what she needed, but not why she needed it. Hope that helps :)**_

**Will I name Renesmee after Alice? **_**That's a good idea, but I don't know.**_

**In what chapter will the Cullen's meet Renesmee? **_**I don't have an absolute answer but it should happen in about four or five chapters. I keep adding more content which delays the meeting, but I think the new stuff is worth it (at least I hope you see it that way)**_

**How dumb are they to leave venom there with Bella? **_**I wouldn't say dumb, just forgetful, ha-ha. Only Carlisle knows that it was kept there. He was also hoping that they would come back someday. Plus he didn't know Alice was giving Bella a key. What can I say, Alice is sneaky!**_

**Will I continue the story?**_** Yes!!!**_

**Will Edward find out about Renesmee?**_** Yes, but I won't say when… sorry I have to keep some things to myself.**_

**Keep reading and reviewing, and asking questions if you want! I hope you like the new development! I had my doubts at first too, but once I wrote it, it just seemed perfect.**

**~kmwhyte**


	7. Lightning Crashes

**Disclaimer: I own nothing when it comes to Twilight. I know… I'm sad too!**

**BPOV**

"Bella?!" Angela's voice was full of panic but I couldn't concentrate on anything but the pain I was feeling and the fear I had for my baby.

"Ahhhhh!" _No, it's too soon, Angela doesn't know enough…_

"Bella, what's going on? What can I do?"

"The baby… he's coming. Ahh! I need to get up to… Carlisle's… Ahh… study!" The pain was piercing, no tearing. It felt like my body was being taken apart.; all of my muscles and joints were being severed from my bones and tendons. I thought I would just burst into pieces at any moment.

"Okay, let's go!" Angela grabbed my arm and draped it over her shoulders and took me up the stairs. I pointed to the door and she helped me inside. I had laid down a large sheet, from Rosalie's bed, a few days ago. I figured it was the best location to go through my transformation with the supplies so close.

Angela must have assumed from the sight that that was what I had planned, so she helped me to lay down on the sheet.

I was clutching my belly, which felt like it would break apart from my body any moment now.

"The syringes! Put them here. Ahhh!" I had laid out two of the syringes on top of the cabinet. I knew it was my only chance, but I needed to wait till the baby was out. After that, I wasn't sure how much time I would have.

"Bella! What can I do?!" There was so much I hadn't told her, but my thoughts were barely lining up at this point.

"Take the… baby when she's out! There's… stuff in the… green room. Angela?!"

"Yeah?!"

"Don't come back into the room, just stay in the house. Ahhh! There's a pitcher in the fridge… it looks gross… but that's for the baby. He needs to eat it." I just hoped that she didn't question the blood too much, most people would…

"Ahhh!"

**APOV (Angela)**

"Ahhh!" _Oh my god, she's going to die. They're both going to die. What am I supposed to do? I don't know what to do!!!_

"Bella!?" Her head fell back and her stomach twitched. I had no clue how to help her but I just started to do compressions on her heart. I felt her heartbeat but it was faint. I went to breathe for her but as I was leaning in I saw her mouth full of blood. I tipped her head to the side and watched as the blood poured out. I blew three quick breathes into her mouth and went back to continue the compressions when I saw her stomach.

Her belly was split down the center covered in bloody gore and there was a tiny baby sitting up against the wall of her torso. She was covered in blood, but she was beautiful. Her eyes caught mine and she looked scared and… worried. She looked past me to Bella and I started compressions again. Her heartbeat was barely there and I was panicking.

I looked around for anything to help when I saw the syringes. She never said what they were for but they had to help somehow. I certainly didn't see how they could harm the situation any more than this.

I grabbed on the syringes and shot it right into her left thigh like an epi-pen. After a second, Bella's eyes opened and she coughed up more blood. Then she looked from me to her baby. Her baby girl. Renesmee.

**BPOV**

I was swimming in the darkness trying to fight my way out. _This wasn't part of the plan. I had a job to do! I had a responsibility to my baby!_

I felt a pinch followed by a shot of pure fire coursing through my leg. I opened my eyes and coughed up blood to see a scared-to-death Angela holding one of the syringes to my thigh. I looked around; _I needed to wait till the baby was out before I took the venom. That was the plan!_

That's when my eyes caught it; a little, wonderful baby sitting up in my open belly. I would have passed out from the sight if not for the perfect little girl staring at me. Her eyes were wide with concern.

"It's okay, we'll be okay…" I whispered for her and she smiled but concern still shined in her eyes. "Take her Angela! I'll be fine!" I yelled more forcefully.

Angela picked her up and ran from the room. She must have been terrified. I took the next syringe and plunged it straight into my heart. I had no idea if that place was any better or worse, but instinct took over. In some way, I was hoping it would all be over with that shot. That I would just cease to exist and the pain would end.

But it didn't. And the largest part of me, my heart and soul, begged me to fight back. To fight for her; for my Renesmee. She needed me; she looked so worried and scared watching me go through this pain. I needed to be strong for her.

The fire intensified and spread throughout my entire body. I felt like I was strapped to a pyre. I screamed once, letting everything come out. _I will NOT scream again!_ I swore to myself. I couldn't do that to them. They were scared enough. I needed to protect my baby and Angela from this. They couldn't know this pain.

***

It felt like hours, but it was probably closer to mere minutes. The fire burned every layer of my being and I just wanted to cry out in pain more, but I was determined not to. I could feel my fingers twitching. I needed a distraction so I ran my fingers over my belly; it was still split but the opening felt smaller than I remembered it. I slide my fingers up to my heart and felt the wet stickiness but no indentation from the venom shot.

I slid my fingers back to my stomach and the opening was nearly half the size it was merely a few seconds ago.

_It's working. I'm healing. I'm changing._

Reality was beginning to mix with my hallucinations, caused by the pain and fire I was experiencing. I was only sure they were hallucinations because of what they contained.

Edward. He was there talking to me.

"_Be strong Bella! Hold on for me, for our daughter! I know it's bad, it's horrendous! I'm so sorry. Please. Just hold on! Please, forgive me for this! I love you."_

It was stupid to believe. He told me everything to negate that last statement before he left. But it was all I had, so I listened. I tried to believe. I focused on his voice to get me through it. He followed me though the pain, even into the darkness that I was entering.

**APOV**

I shut the door to the study and looked into my arms. Bella's baby was staring at me. Every emotion on her face looked out of place on a small child, let alone on a newborn. She was obviously special, but it was more than that. There was some paranormal aspect to these circumstances. Bella was pregnant for maybe four weeks and her daughter looked a few months old already after a few minutes.

Someone here wasn't "normal" and my money was on Edward. His family screamed "not normal." Everyone figured they were just plastic surgery addicts or testing some special drugs that made you gorgeous beyond human expectations.

Apparently, everyone was headed in the wrong direction. It was something mystical. Something otherworldly. _Maybe Bella fell in love with an angel…_

I walked down the hall, looking for the green room as she called it. I shuddered when I heard Bella scream out but I kept walking. I promised to take care of her daughter and she asked me not to return to that room.

I needed to take care of her baby.

I walked into the first room by the stairs and saw a green bedspread. It had to be it. There was a stack of blankets, sheets, and old clothes on the bed. I figured she didn't have diapers and it appeared I was correct. _Some of the sheets could be turned into cloth diapers, I guess_. My parents had used them for the twins for a few months before it overwhelmed them and they went straight to disposables.

I walked into the adjoining bathroom to clean Renesmee up. She was still staring up at me but now she looked… tempted; like she wanted to try something but was truly thinking it out. I figured she was just scared. This was traumatic, but I wouldn't think a newborn would recognize that.

I looked down at her. "It's okay little girl, it's okay. You're momma is gonna be fine. She promised me she would be. I'm Angela, I'm gonna take care of you till she's feeling better. Let's clean you up." She had no idea was I was saying but it seemed that my tone relaxed her. She shifted closer to my chest as I walked to the counter top. I pulled a couple of towels from the shower rod and laid them on the counter.

I grabbed a washcloth and laid her down to start rinsing her off. "See, we'll get you cleaned up so you'll be all ready for when your momma comes back. She'll be so excited to see you again, Renesmee." She locked eyes with me and stared. _Wow, she's so expressive._ Her face was defined, almost like a toddler's. She moved her arms and hands and seemed to point at me and then smiled. I shook my head; _too weird, just a coincidence._

I continued to rub the dried blood from her body and then lifted her with one arm under the faucet to rinse her hair out. She shivered at first and then relaxed in my arm again.

She had natural, beautiful curls, but as the water washed the red out, I saw her natural color. Bronze; just like Edward. She certainly did resemble him. "You do look like your parents…"

I wrapped her in a towel and continued to dry her hair. I placed her on the bed and tore one of the sheets to make a more reasonably sized cloth diaper. I wrapped it around her and fastened it with a safety pin that was holding up one of my belt loops. I didn't have time to mend it before I left the house this morning.

I looked through the clothes on the bed. They looked like they were for a person about the size of Alice Cullen. I figured anything was better than letting this poor angel-baby freeze.

I found the smallest shirt I could find which was a red, short-sleeved top probably meant for sleeping or lounging around the house, because of its tight, skimpy fit. I held it over Renesmee as she tried to grab the material. "Well, it's definitely too big, but it looks like your arms and legs will be free in it… What do ya think?"

Again, she seemed to smile at me. _Okay, now I'm sure I saw that._ I pulled the shirt over her head and tucked her into a blanket.

"There, all clean and cozy…" I picked Renesmee up and cradled her in my arms as I walked down the stairs to the kitchen. _She is such a beautiful baby, an angel…_

I walked into the kitchen and saw the pantry door open. There was a ton food, mostly soup, but at least it appeared I would be able to eat while I was here.

_Crap!_ Bella said she'd be a few days. What was I supposed to tell my parents? It was Friday and I had been to school before Bella called so that was fine, but a few days without returning home…

I pulled out my cell phone and gently rocked Renesmee in my arms to keep her calm. I hit dial and waited for Mom or Dad to answer.

"Hello?" It was Joshua, great; he brought anything I told him.

"Josh, can you tell Mom and Dad that I'm spending the weekend at Jess'. She's wants to go shopping and I promised I-"

He cut me off before I had a chance to add more back story. "Okay, okay. I'll tell them. I don't care though, I don't need to know your plans." He was getting into that pre-teen annoying stage lately. _Yay for me_.

"Okay, tell them I got clothes and I'll go to school with Jess on Monday, she needs a ride." My parents couldn't stand Jessica, there was no way they'd call her to check and Jess had already mentioned going to Seattle for the weekend with Lauren.

"Fine, Bye" Joshua hung up before I could respond.

I put my cell phone back in my pocket and looked down at Renesmee. "Well that was easy. Now what can we get for you; you must be hungry. Your mom said something about a pitcher…" I opened up the door and saw two large pitchers containing what looked to be fruit punch. _Thick fruit punch…_

I pulled one of the pitchers out and looked for a bottle. _No diapers, probably no bottles either…_ I was right but I did find a smaller cup and some straws. _This will do I guess._

I turned the pitcher's lid so I could pour and gasped at the smell. _That smells like… blood!_ _She wants me to feed her baby _blood_! Is she insane?!_

"Blood?" I whispered as I looked at Renesmee who appeared to be sniffing the air deliberately.

I trusted that Bella knew what she was talking about, but _this_… Giving blood to her baby… to eat?! Maybe "angel" was wrong. Maybe I was dealing with something else…

_Vamp_-

No… not a possibility. _Right_?

I looked to Renesmee, who seemed to be reaching for the pitcher. _Maybe?_ I pushed the thought away and decided that I would continue to follow Bella's instructions; it was her baby after all. I poured about a pint of blood into the small cup and placed a straw into it. _Gross._ I held the straw to Renesmee lips and she sniffed again and then immediately starting sipping without restraint. _Really gross._

**A/N: Okay, Renesmee is HERE! It makes me so excited. Lots of you had concerns about Angela being with her (that maybe she'd bite her) and that maybe she'd figure out the whole vampire thing. Hopefully you're getting a bit of that cleared up, but the next chapter should really make it come together.**

**BTW, Renesmee definitely smells Angela, but she also understands more than your average baby. She knows that Angela is there to take care of her, not for her to feast on. That will be explained more in the next chapter too. **

**Also, I want to say that it's going to be a little more than four or five chapters before the Cullens meet Renesmee, right now it will happen in about seven or eight chapters. Sorry! But I worked it out last night and created a timeline and it just worked out that way. But you will get to see more of the Cullens before that, I promise!**

**Thanks again for all the review and favorites. The alerts made me so happy, I decided to update sooner. I haven't started the next chapter and don't plan to till tomorrow, at the soonest, so there probably won't be an update tomorrow. But as you can see I have a problem when it comes to having you all wait for new chapters. Keep reviewing and asking questions if you have them!**

**~kmwhyte**


	8. Pack up, I'm a Stray

**Disclaimer: I own nothing when it comes to Twilight. I know… I'm sad too!**

**BPOV (Early Monday Morning)**

I had been running for miles… although it was probably more like tens of miles. My legs were quite a bit faster now.

I wasn't sure what I was looking for, I knew hunting was a priority but it wasn't in the forefront of my mind at the moment. I was still holding my breath; I had been, since I jumped out of the two-story window. Normally, the height would have scared me but my senses were so alert that I just jumped without thinking. The minute I hit the ground, I took off like a newborn vamp outta hell.

I slowed down a bit; I was probably in Canada by now.

The smells from the house were still sizzling in my memory. I had smelled blood and it smelled… delicious. I knew it was human and then I realized it was a human I knew; or at least one I was friends with and one that I desperately wanted to meet again, without the gore.

I didn't want to hurt them; I didn't want to hurt anyone. I opened up my senses and smelled the air around me. _No humans, but something…_ It had to be some animal, it smelled like an animal. It didn't smell delicious, maybe… a little bland. Still it smelled like food, smelled like blood.

I knew hunting would reduce the bloodlust that was creeping up into the front position in my mind. But I had no idea how to hunt. I always figured one of _them_ would be here to help me, but they weren't anymore. I had to do it on my own.

They never let me tag along during their hunting trips. _He_ always said it was 'too dangerous' and that it was 'pure suicide.' _Whatever, here I am, not knowing what to do, and it's all _his_ fault._

Emmett was the only one who actually ever talked about hunting with me. I think he only did at first because it ticked _him_ off.

***Flashback***

"It's so cool Bella, hunting's awesome. You'll find out someday… I wouldn't bet against Alice." Emmett whispered the last part while watching Alice and Edward fight over some vision she had had. I couldn't help but laugh. I felt bad for Alice, she didn't choose her visions, but Edward didn't care; he always wanted to change them, at least lately. They continued to argue but took it outside away from "human ears;" everyone else could hear them even if they left the property.

"You really think I'll actually become one of you someday with him so… determined against it?" I certainly was having doubts.

"Totally! Alice sees it. Besides you absolutely have to come hunting with us, I'll teach you how to take down a bear." I laughed at his enthusiasm. I really wanted to see them hunting. I could picture them gracefully pouncing on animals left and right before draining the blood. I'm sure it was frightening, but I also imagined that it was beautiful. I couldn't think of anything they could ever do as unbeautiful.

"What's it like? Hunting, I mean." I knew Edward would get furious that I asked and probably even more furious if Emmett answered. But I honestly wanted to know, especially if I would be hunting myself someday.

Emmett cracked a huge smile. "You know I'm not supposed to tell you about that."

"I won't tell him."

"He won't need you to tell him, he'll know because of his freaking mindreading."

"So you won't tell me?"

"I didn't say that…" Emmett's smile grew all the way to his ears. "He'll be mad but I'm used to broody Edward, that doesn't bother me. You have a right to know."

I nodded, encouraging him to continue.

"When we hunt, get give into our instincts. It's animalistic but it's what we need to do to survive. That's why I try to make it fun. You know, make bets about who can catch the most animals or try and fight a bear… or four." He laughed and I couldn't help but join in. Imagining Emmett fighting a bear, or even four bears, made me laugh. Most people would probably be scared to death, either for him or the bears, but after seeing him so eager to fight anyone and anything, I figured it was probably an interesting sight.

"How do you know what to do?" I didn't really think my question out, but I was curious.

"Well… I said that your instincts take over, or rather, your vampire instincts. It's how we're build… made… created, whatever. You've seen our strength, our speed, and our senses, but you've only seen a fraction of what we can do." I tried to interrupt, tried to explain what Edward had shown me that day when he was trying to convince me that he was dangerous, but Emmett just nodded and continued. "I know what Edward has showed you, and trust me, that's just the tipping point. We have more power in our bodies than we actually need.

"When we leave to hunt, it's because we tune everything else out. We can barely differentiate between animal and human blood when we're in that… zone. That's why we go to secluded locations where humans won't go. When we get a whiff of the blood, we kinda go into like a trance. It's crazy; I can barely notice Rose when I smell a bear near me." We both laughed and I could tell he was trying to lighten the mood.

"We feel the draw to our prey, like we're getting pulled to it. You don't even need to think about it Bella, it just happens. The impulse comes over you and you just… bite and drink. It just happens."

"Like it's… involuntary?"

"Yeah, that's a good description. Yeah, it just makes sense and your body needs it so you just do it." Emmett started laughing, probably at the phrase 'do it.' Then his laughter intensified when he saw my blush. "Jeez Bella, you're such a crackup!"

I desperately was trying to change the subject back. "So is that why Edward won't let me go, because he's afraid no one will… stop?"

"Yeah, he has a point though. You. Out there. With all of us. It really isn't safe. But soon you'll be one of us and then you can whoop his ass if he tries to stop you. I can't wait to see that." He burst out in another round of laughter.

Edward came back in, looking quite frustrated. Obviously Alice said more of the things he didn't like to hear. He put his arms around me and then glared at Emmett.

I put my hand on his cheek to make him look at me. "Don't be mad. I asked." He face softened but he still wouldn't smile.

"I'll take you home."

"Okay." I knew I didn't really have a choice.

"I'll talk to you later, Emmett." He said it so softly, I barely heard. I grabbed Edward's hand and put my hand back to his cheek.

"Stop. Don't be mad at him. Or Alice. Just… be here, with me, happy."

He smiled then and I knew he was listening. "Sorry. I am happy here with you, you have no idea."

***End Flashback***

I felt my stomach tighten over nothing but the memory. I hadn't meant to remember so much. I ignored the emotions I was feeling and thought about what Emmett had told me before.

_Follow instincts… I can do that._

I sniffed the air and smelled the aroma again. It definitely wasn't human, so I figured it was safe to "let go," so to speak.

I took off into the direction that called to me. I got about ten feet from the smell and saw what the scent was representing. A deer; _how anticlimactic._ I ran and pounced on the doe before she even knew what was happening. I snapped her neck, eager to end her pain and fear. I sunk in my teeth right next to her major artery and sucked in the warm liquid. It soothed my throat that I hadn't even realized was on fire. I drank till I was only drinking in air.

_Emmett was right; I just knew what to do. Thanks big brother._

I took down two more deer quickly. I didn't think about it at all. As I laid the bodied down into a natural ditch to decompose back into the earth, I thought about Angela and Renesmee.

My throat didn't burn at all but I wasn't sure that would continue when I was face to face with my friend and my baby. _There's really only one way to find out… I'll just take it slow._ I ran, following my own scent to lead me back to the house. It felt like mere seconds had passed before I saw the break in the trees followed by the massive white house.

I could see ever paint stroke along the outside walls and every fingerprint on the wall of glass. I could also hear every sigh and heartbeat. I took a deep, completely unnecessary, breath to settle my nerves.

I ran up the side of the house and jumped through the window to Carlisle's study. I could smell the blood again and my throat ached a bit but I could push it away. I saw the sheet I had borrowed from Rose's room, covered in my blood. I went to the filing cabinet and took out a bio-hazard bag and put the sheet inside. It didn't appeal to me, but it was still potent. I looked back to the spot. The spot where I had Renesmee. The spot where she bit her way out of me. The spot where I turned into a vampire.

I saw the syringes lying on the floor, both empty. I hadn't intended to use both, it was just a precaution that I took out two incase I didn't think it was working. I wasn't sure the amount I would need or the condition I'd be in. _I really didn't intend for both of them to be in me._ I looked to the first syringe. It was the one Angela put in me.

_Well, that's the one I wanted._ I looked at the other one; I didn't even look at the name. I knew which ones I had pulled out. Why I pulled that one, I still didn't know. I should have pulled Carlisle's. _I really didn't want this venom coursing through me for eternity._ I felt like crying, but knew from observation that the tears would never come.

I placed the syringes into the bio-hazard bag and tied it shut. It was over and done with. I couldn't dwell.

I looked around the room; I had stashed some clothes in the closet, so I decided to change. My body was back to its normal size but far from it normal surface or temperature. I was cold, hard, and although I hadn't seen it yet, sparkly. I hoped I'd be beautiful, but I wasn't concerned about it at the moment.

I could hear two heartbeats. One sounded like it was coming from the living room. The body wasn't moving and the heartbeat was a bit faster than I remembered them being. _Renesmee_. I was positive. _She must be on the couch._

I listened for another heartbeat_. Angela._ It sounded like she was in the kitchen and she was moving around, humming to herself. I could smell her blood and the potency but I felt able to resist. Then I smelled more. _Did she hurt herself?_ I heard pouring._ Oh, she must be fixing Renesmee a bottle- bottles, damn!_ I didn't have bottles, I didn't have anything. I was hoping Angela could get me some stuff before I went into labor._ Oh well, I guess she figured something out._

I listened as I heard Angela walk back into the living room with Renesmee's "food." She stopped and signed. "Well I guess it can wait till she's done with her nap." _She naps? She sleeps? Oh my gosh!_ My baby sleeps; I don't way but I was shocked. I guess I figured the vampire part wouldn't make that possible.

I went to the door. I wanted to see her, especially if she was sleeping. I wanted to hold her. I wanted to thank Angela for taking care of her; for sacrificing her weekend… and her perfect attendance, to help me. I opened the door and the smell assaulted my senses. I closed it as quietly as I could but it still made a definite bang.

"Bella?" I heard Angela gasp. I couldn't risk her coming up. I couldn't risk the proximity. I could handle it when there was a whole story plus a door between us, but I wasn't sure about any less than that.

I bounded out of the window in less than a second and stood in front of the wall of glass. I saw Angela standing at the foot of the stairs contemplating whether she should go upstairs or not. I tapped the glass as lightly as I could and saw Angela jump and spin around to face me.

"Bella?" She looked so confused and shocked. I looked at my reflection and saw myself for the first time. I looked different, more… enhanced. But it still looked like me, just more defined. Then I saw my eyes. They were dark crimson. _I should have grabbed some sunglasses._ I held my hand in front of my eyes and waved her over.

"On my god, Bella. What…?" She couldn't finish her question and I knew I couldn't really answer it.

"I can't explain Angela. You don't know how much I wish I could, but its best you don't know anything. I can't risk something happening to you because of me… and her." I looked to Renesmee on the couch. Her head was turned away from me. She looked so perfect with her curls falling off the edge of the cushion.

"Bella… I don't need to know. I have an idea but I don't need it confirmed." She made a nervous laugh and I wondered how much she figured out. Obviously it wasn't enough to make her leave. "I'm glad I could help and I promise, I _won't_ tell _anyone_. Ever." She looked back to Renesmee. "She's really special, and smart. She's absolutely perfect. And she missed you. I swear, I couldn't sworn that she even… never mind."

"She what?" I was concerned. _What _did_ she do? What_ could _she do?_

"It's nothing, I think I'm just a little tired and overwhelmed."

"I'm sorry." I didn't know what else to say.

She looked at Renesmee and back to me after a few minutes. "You're leaving aren't you?"

"Yeah. I have to. I have to protect her. I can't really be seen like this either." I moved my hand and saw her gasp. She collected herself quickly, but vampire reflexes let me catch it.

"I hope you two will be safe. I'll miss you. And I'm really going to miss Renesmee; she's such an extraordinary baby." I could tell she meant it, she fell for Renesmee. I couldn't blame her, I was already missing her and she was just on the other side of the wall. "Are you sure you'll be okay?" She looked nervous and I wondered again how much she figured out.

"Yeah, we'll be good. I wouldn't let anything happen to my baby."

She smiled at me. "I know. Goodbye Bella."

"Goodbye Angela. _Thank you_." She smiled and grabbed her bag. She could probably go to school for the rest of the day.

I held my breath as she walked outside and got into her car to drive away. Then I took a deep breath. I could smell Renesmee, but she didn't smell like a "regular" human. She smelled floral, like freesia, _like me;_ like I used to. And somewhat icy. She smelled perfect.

I opened the door and the bloodlust was the last thing on my mind. I didn't crave her in that way, I craved her company. I sped to her side and picked her up as gently as I could manage so not to wake her. She felt feather-light; like there was nothing in my arms at all. I giggled not knowing if it was my vampire aspect or hers that made it feel like that.

She yawned and opened her eyes. Her mouth opened and then turned into a giant smile. "Hi."

I couldn't think of what to say so I just stared down at her and continued to smile. I already loved her more than anything in the world. More than anyone in the world.

Renesmee shifted and lifted a hand up to my chin. I gasped as a saw a vision of myself covered in sweat with my face enveloped in pain trying to say soothing words to her. Then it flashed to a vision of me holding her, the reflection from the window wall we stood in front of.

The vision disappeared and I looked into her eyes, she looked… proud. "Did you do that?" She lifted her hand to my cheek and showed me a vision of her doing the same to Angela, showing her a vision of me. She was asking Angela where I was. "Oh, you did do that… that's a special gift Renesmee." I was so dumbfounded. I couldn't believe she used her power around Angela, but she wouldn't have known not to. She sensed that I trusted her and so she did too.

I stood there thinking about Angela. She must have been so freaked out. _That must have been what she was about to tell me but she was so unsure she couldn't accept it._ I walked over to the window wall trying to process what to do. Renesmee signed in my arms and then reached up to me again. This time she showed me a vision of Angela. She wanted to know where she went. She loved Angela too. "She went home, she can't stay with us." She showed me the vision again. Her tone was forceful as she mentally asked 'why.'

"Angela isn't like us. But hopefully we'll see her again someday." I wasn't sure if we ever would, or even could. But I couldn't bring myself to tell her that we'd never see her again. I couldn't break her heart.

"Why don't you show me what I missed while I was away?" Renesmee smiled and showed me everything I had missed.

She showed me Angela washing her up and dressing her in one of Alice's shirts. She showed me Angela being confused about the blood, but again choosing to just ignore her concerns. She showed me Angela rocking her and humming some acoustic version of "Use Somebody" by Kings of Leon. She showed me Angela telling her stories about me, mostly from school and never mentioning _him_.

She showed me Angela taking her for walk around the house and her being amazed by the tall green trees; she wanted to touch them but was afraid to ask since Angela didn't respond to her first request.

"You can show or ask me anything Renesmee. We just have to be careful; you can't do _this_ to others, okay?" She showed me myself telling her the statement along with her silent 'yes.' She then showed me Angela again but this time she remembered her smell. She showed me how Angela's blood made her thirsty.

_Oh no, she didn't, did she?_ "I know, I smelled it too, but we don't hurt people, especially Angela. You love her, remember?" Her silent confirmation made me relax. She wouldn't hurt her, I should have known that.

Renesmee yawned again and closed her eyes. A few minutes later, I was sure she was asleep. I didn't want to put her down but I needed to get us ready to leave. I walked up to Alice's room and laid her on the bed. I tucked a blanket around her and started packing a bag of clothes for myself along with some of Alice's shirts for Renesmee. They would have to do till I could go into a store and buy some baby clothes. I put my bags into the back of my truck along with the trunk from Alice. I took some pillows from Alice's bed and created a makeshift bed in my truck for Renesmee.

I decided to take the opportunity to call Charlie and Renee so they wouldn't suspect anything. They both had brought into my stories so I could relax and just worry about where I was headed with my daughter.

As I watched Renesmee sleep I wondered where we would go and what we would do now. I didn't have much confidence in myself, but Renesmee had confidence in me. She wasn't worried or scared. She was relieved and happy that I was here with her.

**A/N: Okay, LONGEST chapter yet. I couldn't seem to stop writing. I just really wanted to wrap up the Angela stuff and I couldn't let go of the flashback with Emmett. Come on, who doesn't love Emmett?!**

**I can't tell you all how great I'm feeling about the reviews! I got like 53 e-mails within an hour and then like ten more while I was going through those. I am literally on cloud nine!**

**I hope you all like this chapter. I wanted to give everyone a good taste of Bella and Renesmee because they won't be in the next chapter… sorry. I'm already missing them. But I'm excited for who's coming back. I'll give you a hint; there will be a few guys and possibly a pixie…**

**Till next time, Read, Review, and Ask!!!**

**~kmwhyte**


	9. Closer

****

Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own anything concerning Twilight except for my copies of the books... and a poster!

EPOV (Edward) (Middle of March, Six months after he left Bella)

I have been sitting in this tree for hours; staring at the house for hours.

I was sure it was probably four in the morning by now. But I couldn't leave. I couldn't do it again. I would never be able to leave _her_ again; I don't know how I did it in the first place.

I was afraid to approach _her_ window. _What if she doesn't want me? What if she's still mad?_ She accepted it in the woods, that I didn't want _her_, and it took all my strength not to grab her by the shoulders and tell her otherwise. I couldn't understand how she believed me so quickly. I still don't.

What if… what if she really believed me?

How could she believe me; believe that I didn't love her, didn't _want_ her?

It's impossible!

It was physically, emotionally, spiritually, and mentally impossible for me _not_ to love _her_ with all of my heart. Just because my heart didn't beat, didn't mean it didn't belong to _her_. I left my heart here with _her_.

I clung to the branch with all of my strength and tried not to rip it off the innocent tree.

I wanted to sneak into _her_ room. I wanted to see _her_ sleep. I wanted to hear _her_ speak in her sleep. I wanted to wake _her_ and apologize. I wanted to kiss_ her_. I wanted to feel _her_ back in my arms.

_How could I have left her like that?_

Not only did I leave her after her birthday party from hell, but I left after I finally gave myself to her, and her to me. It was never my intent to go so far. I never thought we had that possibly. I had planned on it never happening, whether she agreed or not.

I thought I would be dangerous, that I would kill her. Why not just take her hunting with the whole family… I'd probably get the same result.

I fell even more in love with her that night.

She trusted me _not_ to hurt her; _which was exactly what I did in the end_. She loved me back wholeheartedly and we both experienced something that would change us forever.

I couldn't help imagining what would have been if I hadn't left, if her birthday party never went the way it did. We would have stayed together. I would have continued to love her immensely and we could have continued to let our relationship develop, emotionally and physically.

I could see it; what would have happened if I had never left.

We would have stayed together and been happy. Maybe we would have been engaged by now. I certainly would have asked. I sat next to her every night while she slept just thinking about being with her forever. But I could only ask her for a lifetime.

The sun was beginning to rise and I still was in the same position that I had bounded into when I arrived here. She would be turning on her lights any minute now to get ready for school. _I'll wait for her… I'll let her go to school and I'll be waiting when she comes home._

I didn't want to keep her from her life and I felt like I needed a lifetime to apologize to her, not five minutes in between her shower and getting breakfast.

I waited.

I wanted to watch her get ready for the day. I wanted to listen to _her_ heartbeat as she woke up and realized that it was morning. _Her_ heartbeat was the single most important sound in the world and I had missed it for far too long. I vowed to never be away from it again; for any reason, or any amount of time.

I listened.

I heard Charlie's shuffled steps to the bathroom and down the hall. I heard his groans that signaled his back was aching from staying on the couch too late the night before. I heard the water running as he filled the coffee pot. I heard his heartbeat, but not _hers_.

_Where was she? Was she okay?_

I looked around the house for any clues that I may have missed last night. _Her truck_. Her truck was gone. _Where would she have gone? A friend's?_ I couldn't have missed her, I would have noticed if her scent had passed me during the night. She had been gone all night. _A sleepover then. Maybe with Angela or Jess._

I tried not to think of alternatives. I had asked her to move on; _what if she did?_ I knew Charlie was stern, but she lied to him frequently for me. _What if she was lying for another boy?_

I felt jealous for a split second and then I felt ashamed. _I asked her to forget me; I asked her to move on. I can't be like this, but I have to know._ I didn't even know if it was true. My mind had become a loose wanderer the last six months and it continued so. I knew only seeing her again would cease the problem. I just needed to see _her_.

***

I hid in the trees as all the kids filed into Forks High. I could see the mundane drama unfolding between students I remembered, but didn't actually miss.

Mike Newton and Jessica Stanley were apparently breaking up for the 3rd, no 4th, time this school year.

"Just admit that you did it! I know you cheated, just admit it!" Newton was screaming at her from the parking lot as she was walking away from him with Lauren Mallory, who was looking amused.

_"Of course, I cheated! But I'm not telling him that."_ Jessica was trying to think of another excuse for breaking up with him this time. "Oh please, Mike. I'm sick of competing for your attention!"

"What is that supposed to mean?!" _"I swear if she brings up Bella again, I'll smash in her taillights!"_

_Bella? Bella and Mike? No, God please I can't take that one; please anyone else._

"It means exactly what it always means. You are obsessed with Bella Swan! She's not even here anymore. She's been gone for months, get over her! She never wanted you anyways!" Jessica walked into building three for her first class leaving Newton outside.

_Bella's gone? Where'd she go?_ I listened to Mike's thoughts, hoping he would think about where she went.

_"Ugh! I swear this is the last time I ever talk to Jess, I'm over it! I can't believe she brought up Bella. She's been gone for six months, I can't hold out for that…"_

_Six months? She's been gone for six months?_ That means she left shortly after I did. "Where could she have gone?" I whispered in desperation.

_Beep, beep._

A text message.

_-I don't know where she is, but I know you're 2 late. She's long gone. You suck.-_

Alice.

It wasn't the first wasn't the first message she had sent me. She was the one to push me to come here. I would've come sooner or later but she kept going on about how I needed to make up my mind for her own sanity.

I flipped my phone close. _Annoying, psychic pixie._

I headed back to her house. I needed to see that she was really gone for myself. I couldn't bring myself to trust the minds of Newton and Jessica Stanley to know the truth.

I slipped up the side of the house and opened her window. The lock was stiff but I was able to use enough force to break it in half._ Fantastic, I'm breaking into the Police Chief's house. And I don't even have a person telling me its okay anymore. _

_Beep, beep_

_-Nice Edward. Just break in, I'm sure that will help.-_

_Ugh!_ I could hear the sarcasm but I didn't care_._

_Her _room looked the same. She didn't take much when she left. Her computer was still there along with her bed and all the clothes she ever brought with Alice. She had taken most of her books and CDs but there were some still here that she hadn't been partial to. It looked like she only took what she absolutely wanted or needed.

I could smell _her _scent and it nearly took me to my knees.

I couldn't smell Charlie in the room at all. I'm sure he was devastated when she left; he probably couldn't bring himself to even opening the door.

Without thinking, I pulled out my phone and dialed the Police Department's number.

_Ring._

_Ring._

_Ring._

_Ring._

_Ring._

_Only in Forks would you have to wait more than two rings for the police to answer a damn phone!_

_Ring._

"Forks Police Station. Chief Swan speaking. What's this concerning?"

"Chief Swan, it's…" I couldn't say it was me. He'd kill me. I'm positive. "Mike Newton."

"Well hey, Mike. What seems to be the problem?"_ At least I'll be able to get Mike into some trouble for calling without an emergency, although I didn't call 911 for that exact reason._

"Well, I don't really have an emergency but I have a favor to ask. I'm trying to get a hold of Bella and I was wondering if you remembered where she went." _God, that's stupid. Of course he knew where she went!_

"Mike, you shouldn't call here unless you need the police. But… you know Bella moved back to Florida with her mom. You saw her before she left, she needed the change." _She needed a change?_

"What do you mean Cha- Chief Swan?"

"Mike, you remember how bad she was, but she's better now. You want her number?"

"Yes. Yes, please."

Charlie gave me her number but I knew I needed to actually see her. I couldn't say what I needed to say over the phone.

I bent down to the floorboards and pulled up the one that I used to hide her gifts. They were all there, she hadn't found them. The plane tickets, the CD, along with the pictures. I wanted to cry when I saw the pictures. _Why did I take these from her?_ I put the contents into my jacket pockets and pulled the board back over.

I leapt out of the window and headed to the airport to catch the next flight to Jacksonville.

****

_APOV (Alice)_

_Good God, he couldn't have realized his brainless mistake back in September._ I knew he wouldn't find her. She was long gone and I didn't have the slightest idea where she went. All I knew was he wasn't finding her with the decisions that he was making.

I texted Edward again as I saw him reach Bella's mom's house_. _

_-She's not there either, idiot.-_

Ten seconds later my phone rang. I just pushed the green button; I knew he was getting frustrated with me texting him throughout his search. _Oh well, it's my right since he left my sister and forced me to as well._

"Hello Edward, how are you doing today?"

I heard him growling as he fought for control of his temper. "Where is she Alice? I need to find her…" His tone was desperate at the end.

"I know you_ need_ her Edward, but you left her. Besides, I don't know where she is." _I wish I did though…_

"How is that possible Alice, you see the damn future. Look for her! Tell me where she is!"

"Control your temper Edward. I will hang up on you." I had had my fill of his broodiness and pent up rage for the last six months. It had put a strain on my own relationship since Jazz was feeling all of it too.

"Fine… I'm _sorry. _But why can't you see her, why won't you tell me?" He was desperate again and I decided to take pity._ It's not like I have anything useful to tell him, but stuff he should know none the less._

"You broke her, Edward. I have barely seen any visions of her since you decided that we needed to leave her be, to live a _normal, human_ life. And in those visions, she's miserable and confused and just… broken!" I had seen her smiling a few times too but he didn't need to know that. Besides, they were short and blurry and I couldn't be sure of the truth in them. "I can't see where she is or who she's with. I almost never see her entire body; just her face displaying those painful emotions. I don't know where she is or where she would go; if I did I would find her myself!

"You shouldn't have waited so long to go find her. I swear; I'm not even sure if…"

"Sure if, what?" He tone was depressed; he knew what I was getting at but he needed me to confirm it.

"I'm not sure if… if you'll find her. I saw us all seeing her again before we left but now… I haven't seen that vision for months now."

"So, I might never find her. I might never she her again." They weren't questions.

"I don't know. I hope _I _get to see her again." I wished that everyday, that I could see Bella again. I missed my sister.

"I can't accept that Alice. I _will_ find Bella!" _I hope you do…_ He hung up on me.

"Alice?" Jasper came in and walked over to me. "Edward?"

"Yeah. He won't find her. I can't even see her now." I wanted him to find her but I just knew he wouldn't. And in all honesty, I'm not sure it would be good for her if he did.

"He won't give up, Alice. He finally sees his mistake."

"It doesn't matter Jazz. I can see it. He'll search for years… he still won't find her. I wish I was wrong…" Jasper rubbed my shoulders in comfort but I was too far into my own thoughts to let him sooth me.

****

EPOV

Alice was wrong, I'll find her. I have to.

I reached Renee's house just after sunset._ Damn Florida sunshine kept me away for hours._

I looked in the windows and saw no sign of her. I knew I wouldn't, but I still hoped that Alice was wrong.

I had nothing to lose. I pulled out my phone and dialed Renee's number.

_Ring._

_Ring._

"Hello?" Renee picked up the phone quickly and I could hear that she hoped it was Bella. She hadn't heard from her in about a week, but she wasn't worried.

"Hello, is this Bella's mom?" I was keeping up the Mike impersonation and knew he'd ask something stupid like that._ Granted he wouldn't be seeing her and would actually have a reason to ask that. Ugh!_

"Yes, why?" _"Oh my god, is she okay? Did something happen?"_

I tried to ease her panic. "My name is Mike. I'm a friend from Forks and I was wondering if she was there?" I just wanted to hear her thoughts so I would know where to search next.

"Why would she be here, Mike? Bella is in Forks with her father…"_ "Is Bella not with Charlie?_

"Oh, I'm sorry… that's right." She lied to them. She told them both that she was living with the other. My statement didn't alleviate Renee's concern; she decided to call Charlie as soon as I hung up._ Crap, I didn't mean to get her in trouble._

_"_Is Bella not there, Mike?" There was nothing I could say to sway her from calling.

"I haven't seen her." It was a stupid response, but I was pretending to be Newton.

"Goodbye Mike, I need to make a call." She hung up quickly.

Her mind was panicked and she had to redial several times before she had Charlie's number right.

"Where's Bella?!" Renee screamed into the phone as soon as Charlie answered.

"Renee? How am I supposed to know, she lives with you. Why don't you know?"

"She sure as hell doesn't live with me. She has been with you for over a year now!"

"No, she was with me until she moved back with you in September." Charlie's tone was placating and Renee was getting angrier by the second.

"She did not move back here in September! She's been gone since September?!"

"…Yes." Charlie was nervous but without hearing his thoughts I wasn't sure if it was because he was worried about Bella or fearful of Renee's reaction.

"How could you not call me?!"

"I didn't think she would lie to me, about that…"

"Well she did!" Renee hung up on Charlie then and quickly dialed Bella's cell phone number.

_Ring._

_Ring._

_Ring._

"Your call has been forwarded to an automated voicemail. After the beep please leave a message for: Bella. Beep."

"Isabella Marie, you will call me as soon as you get this! You will call me and tell me where the hell you are and why you lied to me and your father about living with us! You better have an explanation Bella! And you better call me tonight or I will call the FBI, CIA, secret service, and whoever else I need to call to find you!"

I was honestly a bit afraid of Renee at that point. I waited outside her house all night with no calls from Bella.

Renee called and left three more messages to the same effect as the first, along with one that was purely pleading her to call and tell her she was safe. I was praying she would listen to that one. I was getting more anxious listening to Renee's thoughts.

Renee had also called Charlie back to apologize and exchange everything they knew. Charlie had left several messages for Bella as well and while he said they were kinder and merely asked her to call and say she was okay, I had my doubts.

The sun was coming up and I needed to find shelter from the sun._ Sparkly vampire sightings never help anything._

I continued to come back to Renee's house for the next three nights but Bella never called. She did however send an e-mail.

_Mom and Dad,_

_I am writing both of you so you don't panic or think I'm hiding anything from one of you._

_I'm fine. I traveled on my own for bit and now I'm taking classes online to get my GED._

_I'm sorry I lied; I just needed to be on my own. And I'm sorry, but I'm still not going to tell you where I am. I'll call you both soon, but I have a feeling that I need to let you both cool down. I will call you soon and don't worry, I really am doing well._

_Love Bella_

I left Renee's. I knew Bella wasn't going to tell her where she was. She would have done it already if that was her intention. There was nothing to go on, so I just started searching state by state.

****

A/N: This chapter was hard to write for some reason. I had a ton of ideas and most ended up being crossed out of my notebook. Some didn't work for the timeline and some didn't work for the character's personalities. Although I am happy with the chapter, I am surprised at how different it is from what I thought it would be. My favorite part had to be Alice telling Edward off. I've waited for that for too long!

I hope you all enjoyed seeing Edward, Mike, and Charlie again, along with Jess and Renee. Next chapter is all Bella and Renesmee and will be set two years from the start of the story. I'm SO excited for that chapter, I've been thinking about it since I thought of the plot. I'm hoping it will be up tomorrow but if it's not, it'll be up Tuesday because I'll be gone for Labor Day weekend (Universal Studios, Orlando!!!).

As always, Read, Review, and Ask! I love your comments, keep them coming!

~kmwhyte


	10. Give Me Back my Point of View

**Disclaimer: I own nothing when it comes to Twilight or the songs that I make reference to. I know… I'm sad too!**

**BPOV **

I walked into Renesmee's room to tuck her in and read her a story. It was our nightly ritual that both of us loved. During that time, it didn't matter that we were all the other had or that we were staying in abandoned houses or that we didn't venture out into the real world more than what was necessary.

When it was just her and me and the story we were reading… I felt at home, and I knew she did too. Granted it was all she knew, but she still loved our life. I could tell. It made me so happy that even though I couldn't give her everything she should have, she still had a happy childhood.

"Momma? Can you tell me a story tonight, instead of reading one?"

"Sure, what kind of story did you want to hear, baby?" I couldn't say no to her unless she was in danger. Those chocolate brown eyes made me melt every time. If that was all she ever had of me in her, I would be thrilled.

"… A story about Daddy?" She was hesitant; her tone indicated that.

And I was frozen. We didn't talk about her father, ever, and this was the first time she ever asked me about him. She was nearly two but she looked like a five or six year old. Still in two years, she never asked about him. And I wasn't exactly giving out any information.

"I do have a daddy, right? You have a daddy; Grandpa Charlie." She had never met Charlie. or Renee, but she had seen pictures. They knew nothing about her. She knew we didn't tell the both of them for protection, both for us and for them. But she still loved her grandparents just as much as I did.

"Yeah, honey… you have a daddy. Of course you do."

"What's his name?" I couldn't believe I had never mentioned it.

"Edward, your father's name is Edward." It had been a while since I voluntarily thought, or said, his name, but it wasn't painful anymore. I still loved him, but not in the same hopeless way I used to as a teenager. He gave me Renesmee, how could I not love him for that?

"Edward, I like that name! Where is he, why don't we see him?" I didn't want to lie to her, but what was I supposed to say? _Your daddy left me because he didn't love me anymore, but don't worry he didn't know about you. I'm sure he wouldn't have left if he knew._ No, I couldn't say that. It's not that I doubted he would be in her life, if he knew, but I had no idea where he was… I didn't want her heart to break, since we would most likely never see him.

"Well, your daddy had to move away before you were born. I didn't get a chance to tell him about you before he left. Otherwise, I'm sure he would visit you. I'm sure your daddy would love you very much."

"Why'd he move?"

"He needed to go be with his family." It wasn't really a lie, as far as I knew, the Cullens were all still together. Together and happy, without me. _Bitterness shows its ugly face._

"He has family, so… I have more family?" All three of her dimples showed when she broke out into the biggest smile to show her excitement.

"Yes, you have two uncles, two aunts, and another set of grandparents." I had no reason not to tell her. She should know about them. If anything ever happened to me, I would hope they would take care of her. I still had the credit card from Alice and told Renesmee to use if I ever disappeared or was hurt.

"Really? What are their names? What are they like?" This direction of the conversation was better for me; I had no problem telling her about my former family.

"Well, you're grandparents are named Carlisle and Esme-"

She gasped. "Esme, I understand now! Renee and Esme. Renesmee. Me! You named me after both my grandmas."

"Yes, I did."

"That's neat, Momma. What are Carlisle and Esme like?"

"Well, your Grandpa is a doctor and very friendly and understanding. And your Grandma is extremely sweet; you would love her. And I know she would adore you." Esme _would _adore her; I was certain of that. It made my heart sink a bit to know that Esme may never meet her. I knew she would love seeing her grow up.

"What about my uncles?"

"You have an Uncle Jasper. He loves history and understands people really well, especially their emotions. And you have an Uncle Emmett. He's a bit scary looking but he's a big teddy bear. He acts like a kid most of the time. You would love them both." I laughed as I thought of Emmett's antics. He was such a goofball.

"They sound nice. What about my aunts?"

"You have an Aunt Rosalie-"

"That's a pretty name!"

"Yes, it is a pretty name and she is very pretty, too. She's married to your Uncle Emmett. And then Uncle Jasper is married to your Aunt Alice."

"You've said that name before… she's the one who helped us, right?"

"Yes, your Aunt Alice helped us a lot. We owe her a lot. She's loves to shop and is a little hyper, but she's special. She can see the future, that's how she knew to help us."

"Wow. Did she see me coming?"

"I don't know… she never said, but she knew the stuff I would need to help me take care of you. But I don't think she knew about you." I would hope that if she knew, she would have come to visit by down. I desperately wanted Alice to know Renesmee and vise versa. Without Alice, neither of us would be here.

"That's nice. I wish I could meet her; I want to meet all of them. Do we have to stay away from them too?"

"No, we don't have to stay away. They're like us. Maybe someday we'll see them. You're Aunt Alice did say I would see her again someday, and if I do… I'll make sure you two meet."

"Was Aunt Alice your friend?"

"Yes, how'd you know?" She was so perceptive, sometimes it worried me. There were many things I wasn't in a hurry for her to discover.

"Because you started crying when you started talking about her." I wasn't really crying since vampires can't cry; but Renesmee knew what it looked like. She had seen me cry before a few times. She always tried to comfort me when I did and this time was no different as she rubbed my wrist with her thumb.

"You're Auntie Alice was my best friend and I miss her. I miss all of them."

"I'm sorry, Momma. Do you miss Daddy, too?"

"Yes, I miss your Daddy, too." I'll always miss him.

"Do you love Daddy?"

"Yes, I'll always love your Daddy, he gave me you!"

"Good, I love Daddy, too!" That broke my heart. I wasn't lying. I still loved Edward. I was pretty sure I'd be in love with him till the end of time, which still would come too soon. But I also knew I wasn't going to be with him either. And I didn't think she would get to meet him.

We lived on our own. We had lived in seven towns in the past two years, moving to different vacant houses. I hadn't used much of the money Alice had left for us; just enough to get by. The only things I brought were things for Renesmee. I didn't need anything, not as long as I had her.

"Momma? Do you have any pictures of Daddy and his family?"

"No honey, I'm sorry I don't." That was the truth; he took all my pictures of him and I hadn't stolen any pictures when we were still in Forks. I didn't appreciate his actions and refused to mimic them.

"I wish you did, I want to know what he looks like. What they all look like."

"I'm sorry, baby." I hugged her closer.

"Was Daddy pretty?"

I laughed. Even with her advanced personality and intellect, she was still just a little girl. She still thought everyone was either; pretty or ugly, no variations or shades of gray. "Yes, your Daddy was very _handsome_."

"Do I look like him, like I look like you?"

"Yes, your hair color is just like his and you have his nose. Actually, you're entire face, besides my lips and eye color, looks like him."

"Really?"

"Yes. You look like your Daddy very much." She did look like Edward. Probably more than I like to admit. I saw it everyday, but surprisingly, it only made me happy. It was fitting. Even without pictures and things he had given me, I had a reminder; a reminder that was worth everything to me. I loved her more than my own life.

"Momma?"

"Yes, Renesmee?"

"Do you know where Daddy is now?"

"No, I don't."

"Do you know where my aunts and uncles are? Or where my grandparents are?"

"No. I wish I did though, honey." I knew what she was getting at, she wanted to meet them. They were her only family, besides myself, that she could actually meet and talk to and be honest with. She knew she could never tell anyone about vampires or drinking blood or anything else we could do. But she wouldn't have to hide anything from the Cullens.

Fortunately, she never really got a chance to be tempted to tell anyone. She never really got a chance to interact with anyone much either. We only traveled into town for shopping needs. We tended to attract attention, what with both of us being very beautiful. Renesmee looked more human with a natural blush on her cheeks and the color of her eyes, but she also grew extremely fast.

We moved every few months so nobody looked too closely at our situation. _Single, striking, teenage mother with a gorgeous toddler that could form grammar-correct sentences living outside of town in a house that was supposed to be empty._ Yeah, that tended to draw attention and I was already a bit paranoid.

Renesmee looked up to me then and her eyes looked sad. My heart broke when they looked like this. Her eyes were on the verge of tears and so far the only things that ever made her cry were when we moved, or if we talked about Angela.

She still remembered Angela and wanted to see her again desperately.

"Oh honey, don't cry. How 'bout I tell you a story about them. Would that make you feel better?"

"Okay." She wasn't enthusiastic, but I could tell she wanted to hear it. The trouble was; I was trying to think of a _happy_ story that involved_ all of them_ that I could actually tell her, and my vampire mind had started to blur my human memories. I thought back to a casual night where everyone was home, but not necessarily all involved in the action.

"Okay, well one time, I was at your Daddy's house and the whole family was there. We weren't doing anything special; it was just a night in. Your Aunt Alice and Uncle Jasper were there-"

"What about Uncle Emmett and Aunt Rosalie?"

"Yes, they were there, too. And we-"

"What about Grandma and Grandpa?" She didn't want to leave anyone out.

"Umm, your Grandpa was at the hospital; he got called in because another doctor was sick. And your Grandma… was in the kitchen. She was fixing me dinner. I still ate food then." She giggled; I had told her that I used to be different, like other people; human. She thought it was silly that I used to eat human food because she couldn't stand the smells. "Anyways, me and your Daddy were sitting on the couch talking to your Aunt Alice about what we should do that weekend. Aunt Rosalie and Uncle Emmett were going hunting with your Grandma and Grandpa, so the four of us would stick together.

"Your Aunt Alice wanted me to go shopping with her but, as you know, I don't like to shop and your Daddy wasn't helping me at all. Every time, I looked to him for help, he was glancing in the other direction, having a silent conversation with your Uncle Jasper."

"Huh?" _Of course, I hadn't told her about his ability._

"Right. Your Daddy has a power, kinda like you. He can read minds."

"What?"

It was old news to me so I laughed at her shocked expression. "Your Daddy can read minds. He just hears what people are thinking whether they want him to or not."

"That sounds… awful. What if you don't want him to hear you?"

"You don't really have a choice, baby. He can't control it, he just hears… everything. He doesn't do it on purpose, or to make you uncomfortable. He just does it, it's who he is." I don't why I was defending him. It didn't matter; we would probably never see him. But I didn't want her to be afraid of Edward, or think he was a bad person. I wanted her to love him, even if she never met him.

"Did it bother you when he read your mind?" _Oh boy…_

"Well, your Daddy couldn't read my mind."

"Why not?" I still had no clue. _I wonder if he still can't, now that I'm a vampire, too._

"I'm not sure. I guess my brain just worked differently and he couldn't read it." I could tell by her expression, I wasn't making any sense to her. As much as she seemed to be on the same cognitive level, sometimes… she just wasn't there. "I really don't know, baby."

"Hmmm… what was Daddy and Uncle Jasper talking about in their minds?" Now that she understood, at least partially, she just wanted to hear more about them.

"I didn't know at the time, but they were betting on who would win; Alice or me?"

"What would you win?" Again, sometimes she _was_ her age, or at least what age she appeared to be.

"Well, if I won; I got to stay home with your Daddy and spend some time reading and listening to music with him. But if your Aunt Alice won; then I had to go shopping with her and probably would be there from sun-up to sun-down for both Saturday and Sunday."

"They both sound like fun, Momma." Of course they did. She loved to shop for new clothes even if we rarely did so.

"I'm sure they do to _you_, but remember _I'm_ the one who would have to go shopping." She giggled again while she let out a long yawn. I knew I needed to wrap up the story. She needed to sleep.

"So who won, Momma? You or Auntie Alice?" _Alice would love that name…_

"Well, when I saw your Daddy smiling, I realized why. He was smiling because he saw who would win at the same time your Aunt Alice saw the future and what we would end up doing that weekend. So I asked your Daddy who would win."

"What did he say?"

"He said, 'Bella wins, you're both stubborn but Bella wants it more.'"

"So you won, Momma?"

"Yeah, I won and I got to spend time reading and listening to music and spending time with your Daddy, Aunt Alice, and Uncle Jasper that weekend." Actually I only spend time with Edward that weekend, but I didn't want her to know. If I had my way, she would never be alone with a boy, _ever._

Renesmee giggled again, showing all three of her dimples. "Now it's time for _you_ to go to bed. You need sleep. Goodnight sweet girl, dream happy dreams."

"Goodnight Momma, I love you."

"I love you too, more than my own life." I kissed her cheek and tucked her blanket around her shoulders.

I turned off the light to her room and headed towards the living room on the other side of the house. I could hear here tossing, she always needed to toss and turn before actually falling asleep. I smiled as I thought about my beautiful daughter.

Then I began to think about Edward and the rest of the Cullens. I really did miss them, _all of them_. Even _him._

I felt guilty.

I felt guilty that he didn't know about Renesmee, or me. I felt guilty that I wasn't seeking him out. I felt guilty that Renesmee wouldn't know him, because of me. And I felt guilty because I didn't want that to change.

She was turning two years old next Wednesday; in four days, my, our little girl would be two years old. She didn't want anything for her birthday. I had gotten her a locket last year, but this year I was completely stumped. I didn't want to spoil her, but I wanted to get her something.

There was one thing I could get her… I could try to find _him_.

I could use Alice's credit card and she would find us, and then we'd find him.

The option had always been there… and it always would be there. But I couldn't do it.

_I'm not ready._ I had no problem dealing with the fact that we may run into each other someday; I mean Alice said we would, but I wasn't ready to seek him, or the rest of them, out. As selfish as it was, I wanted my daughter to myself right now.

She was growing so quickly; I didn't know when it would stop, or even if it would stop.

But…

I could give her something else. I knew where there were pictures of Edward and his family; in Forks.

We could go there, we were close enough, and we could get one of the pictures from the house and she could have a picture, maybe even a few, of her other family.

We needed to move anyways. We had lived in Odessa, Washington for about four months now, and I didn't have to be a vampire to hear those whispers.

_Okay, tomorrow… we'll pack up. I think I'll wait to tell her._ I didn't want to get hopes up and then something happens that prevents us from stopping, or finding the pictures.

_Yeah, I surprise her. Forks. I'm really going back to Forks… and I can't even see anyone…_

**A/N: Okay, this is my favorite chapter! I can't even express to you all how much I love it. I have been thinking about it and going over the questions Renesmee would ask since I thought up the plot. I think it's so sweet and really shows Bella being a mom.**

**The next chapter won't come out till at least Tuesday because I'm leaving early tomorrow and won't be back till late Monday night. I know what's going to happen in the next chapter (to an extent) but haven't started it and I am not intending to till Tuesday morning. Sorry, I'm gonna miss you all just as much as I'll miss the characters.**

**With that said, READ, REVIEW, and ASK questions if you have them. You know I love the comments!**

**~kmwhyte**


	11. Walking with a Ghost

**Disclaimer: I own nothing when it comes to Twilight or the songs I make reference to. I know… I'm sad too!**

**BPOV**

I rethought my decision over and over again. It had started to become a question in my mind, instead of a conclusion.

_Should I really go back to Forks? There's nothing left there for me. _

I couldn't see Charlie, although I'm sure he would love to see me. I couldn't visit any of my friends, although I'm sure Angela would love to see Renesmee again. I couldn't decide if she would freak out or just be unfazed by Renesmee's growth. I guess, I couldn't really decide how I felt about her growth either.

I had started packing up the possessions that we had, which wasn't much. Clothes, some books and music, and then things that Renesmee needed were about all we really had. Everything else we ever needed we either brought, when we had to, or just borrowed from the abandoned houses we lived in.

I had been sending e-mails to Charlie and Renee from libraries, so I didn't need a computer. I called them as well, but e-mails were easier since I didn't have to worry about unexpected questions, or Renesmee saying something to me. _Nothing would freak them out more than if Renesmee called me 'momma' too close to the receiver._

She knew not to talk while I was on the phone with them, but she also loved to listen and insisted on being in my lap when we talked so she could hear them.

Both Charlie and Renee thought I was in Alaska. Somehow they figured out that I lied to them and that I had basically "ran away," as they had put it. I hadn't planned on telling them for a few more months. I figured best case scenario, I would tell them I moved out before they discovered my lie. But that wasn't the case.

I told them that I moved to Alaska and was taking virtual online courses to earn my GED and then I was going to start taking a few classes a semester for college, University of Alaska. I was surprised that neither of them even thought of asking about what I was doing for money.

Yet, they certainly had enough other things to grill me about. _How could lie to us? Does this have to do with _that _boy? Where are you living? Are you alone? Who are you with? Can't you come back? Can I come see you, see how you're doing? Are you staying healthy? _The questions ranged from my personal safety, to my mental well-being, to my vacation schedule.

There was no way that either of them would actually be able to visit me. Renee would hate the weather in Alaska and Charlie wouldn't be able to get that much time off. Then there was the added point that I wasn't actually in Alaska. I had stayed there for a few months in a town called Gambell. It was on one of the islands off the coast. We only stayed three months because Renesmee grew so quickly, but it was gorgeous.

I liked Gambell and so did Renesmee. Moving from there was the first time I had ever seen her cry. My heart shattered when she cried then and I figured she'd cry today when we left Odessa. She liked Odessa but was actually more fascinated with the snow and forests surrounding the area than the town itself.

_Maybe, we'll stay for a while longer. Forks will always be there…_

I had everything packed but I just wasn't sure what to do next. I stared at the bags warring with myself whether to pack up Renesmee's things or to unpack my own.

I stood for a long time until I felt a warm, little hand on my hip.

"Why are you up?" I thought about the "disapproving mother-tone" I was using and tried to not laugh at myself.

"Nighttime's over, it's seven." I looked at my watch and it was. _Holy crow, I've been standing here for hours. _"What are you doing, Momma? Are we moving again?"

I reached down and embraced Renesmee into my arms. "Yeah. We're moving." I couldn't really deny it. The people were getting suspicious and I knew she would want the pictures that were in Forks. The whole reason for going to Forks wasn't for me, it was for her. And I'd do anything for her.

"Why?" She looked down and I saw the tears starting to gather in her eyes.

"Oh honey. You know we can't stay too long anywhere. It's time for us to move somewhere new. I promise someday we will stay in a place a lot longer; just not yet."

"Okay. Are we leaving today?"

"No, we're leaving tonight, so today we can do whatever you want to do." She smiled at me then.

It was seven hours to Forks from Odessa and it would only take me about four in my Audi. I had to leave my truck in Oregon when it finally died on us about seven months back. We found a house about ten miles away in Portland to stay at for a few days while I looked for another car. I didn't want to use Alice's money but I didn't really have a choice.

I went to six different car dealerships and couldn't get over the prices. I started looking into the car ads and found a 2003 midnight blue Audi A4 Cabriolet Compact that some soccer mom wanted to sell because her son kept getting speeding tickets.

Apparently the boy's father brought it for him when they divorced and now the mother had the pleasure of paying all the additional expenses. She couldn't deal with the insurance, maintenance, and the forty two speeding tickets he had accumulated so she decided to sell it to teach her son a lesson. I ended up paying her ten-thousand cash for the car. She only wanted enough to pay the bills but I felt bad, so I gave her more. I couldn't believe that both her ex-husband and son were making her deal with this. I hadn't planned on spending that much but for a fast car, I figured why not. I had grown accustomed to "fast things" since becoming a vampire.

Renesmee decided she wanted to wander through the forest and enjoy the snow with me. I told her we could enjoy the snow where we were going next but she wouldn't hear of it.

"The snow is different here, Momma. It's whiter and more fluffy."

"Okay, honey." I drove up Highway 21 and then turned off onto a maintenance road. I got out at vampire speed, since I didn't have to worry about anyone seeing, and grabbed Renesmee from the car.

"Do you want ride or run?" She wasn't as fast me but she was still faster than a human. If I slowed a bit, she kept up perfectly.

"I'll ride." I lifted up and she gripped onto my back. I never could decide if she was just extremely light or if it was the vampire strength, because I could barely feel back there.

I ran for about ten minutes before I stopped. I asked her if she wanted to keep going, but she said she wanted to explore a little. I watched her as she took bouncing steps through the snow. Her shoes barely made an imprint because she was so quick to move. We ended up in a clearing that we usually visited after hunts or on sunny days when we wanted to stay out of our little house.

She didn't sparkle like I did; just glowed. I would imagine if it was dark, she'd make a pretty good night-light, but in the daytime it was just faint enough that it looked liked she had gotten into some body shimmer.

She went to sit in the middle of the clearing in her little jogging suit. If she wasn't a few degrees warmer than humans, I would have protested. But she had never even been sick and never got cold. I had a brought a change of clothes anyways since the jogging suit would end up getting soaked from the snow.

"Where are we going Momma?"

"Where we're going is surprise, but after we go there, we're moving to Bainbridge Island." I had seen it on a map and loved the location, and I couldn't bring myself to leave the state just yet.

"Where's Bainbridge Island?"

"It's in Washington, too. You'll like it."

"Why are we leaving at night this time, we always leave early in the morning?" The truth was that we were leaving at night because we needed to arrive at night. I didn't want to risk Charlie being on duty driving around or one of my old friends spotting us.

"Because I'm taking you somewhere special, and it's a surprise. We'll get there in time for you to wake up; you can sleep in the car."

We continued to talk for while. She asked me more about Bainbridge Island and subtly tried to get hints about the surprise. After a while she figured out it was a birthday surprise and got very excited. We stayed in the woods for a while and decided to hunt. She was a fierce little predator taking down a large female deer, while I took down the buck that was there also. I tried to joke with her that I would get her a cake this year for her birthday and was rewarded with a very loud "ewww."

I had gotten her a cake last year, if only for the occasion and tradition. She had tried it but the minute the icing touched her tongue she spit it out.

When we got back to the house, I changed her into her pajamas and started loading the car while she was taking pictures of the house.

The only thing I ever for myself with Alice's money, besides my new car, was a camera. I was determined to document Renesmee's life, if only for my benefit, but I knew if I ever met the Cullens again, they'd be curious to see how she was as a baby and a child. Lately she had been attached to the camera like it was another appendage. She took a picture of me loading the car and then decided we needed a picture of both of us. We set the camera on top of the car and stood in front of the house. With vampire speed, we were waiting with smiles for the auto function to go off.

***

It had only taken three hours and forty seven minutes for us to reach the Forks welcome sign. It was just after midnight and the town was silent as I passed the few houses near the hidden drive. I opened my window a bit so I could smell.

I had no reason to worry but I also had no desire to risk anything. I couldn't smell anything except trees and dirt and ferns. I took the turns in the drive with a little more force, just to experience it like I used too. Unfortunately, I woke Renesmee up with my sudden turns.

"Momma?" She lifted her head and let out a yawn. "Where are we?"

I didn't say anything. I wasn't quite sure how to explain where we were just yet. As I crossed through the final turn the large white house came into view. It looked a little worse for wear but still very majestic. Renesmee gasped when she saw it and I knew she recognized it.

"We've been here before." It wasn't a question, but I didn't think she actually knew when we were here last.

"Yes baby, we were here for a little while when you were born. I promise you can explore tomorrow, but you need sleep. Come on." I stopped the car, got out and pulled her into my arms with her blankets all within five seconds.

"But… Momma, I want-"

"No. Sleep. I promise we'll stay a bit and in the morning you can do whatever you want."

I got the spare key from the same I had left it before and flew up the stairs to Alice's old room. I had placed one of the plastic sheets back over it so time wouldn't disturb the trimness of her bedspread. I smashed a few of the oversized pillows down and tucked Renesmee in.

"Goodnight sweet girl, dream happy dreams for me." She yawned again and I knew she was losing the fight with herself to stay up. I hummed a bit and watched her eyes close. Her lips opened to form a perfect "o" and I left her be.

***

_There's more dust…_

I had walked around the outside of the house three times before I brought in our stuff from the car. After I set our things down, I had started walking around. It was the same except for the dust. _Esme would be horrified._ I couldn't help but laugh.

I ended up in Carlisle's study. His room seemed to hold a lot of significance for me since I burned here. You could still faintly smell my human blood. I spent a few hours there just looking and seeing.

Sometime around five, I ended up in the living room, removing the plastic sheets so Renesmee could sit when she woke up. I didn't have to wait long; she was up by six fifteen.

"Momma?" I heard her call from upstairs but she hadn't moved from the bed. I ran up the stairs, just out of habit to be with her.

"Good morning baby! How'd you sleep?" She scurried into my lap and yawned a "good." We sat there for a few minutes while I ran my fingers threw her hair.

"Momma, why are we here?"

"We're here… because this used to be your Daddy's house. And I thought you'd like to see it now that you can appreciate it. Happy Birthday Renesmee."

"But my birthday isn't for a few more days…" She giggled and I knew she wanted to just run around the house and explore, but she wanted to gauge my reaction as well.

"Doesn't matter. Guess whose room we're in?" I figured she would guess Edward's, but she did tend to surprise me. She looked around at the colors and pillows and sighed.

"I don't know… it's not Daddy's." I nodded my head to encourage her to guess. "Is it Aunt Alice's or Aunt Rosalie's?"

"It's your Aunt Alice and Uncle Jasper's room, yes. And look over there; see the picture." She was off my lap before I even finished the sentence and back in my arms with the picture.

"It's them, all of them, isn't it?" I nodded again, her excitement made my heart grow twice its size. "It's you, you just look… different." She pointed to me in the picture and I explained that that's what I used to look like.

"You still look pretty, Momma. Which one's Daddy?"

"Guess." I knew she could do it from what I had told her about him. _Emmett and Jasper certainly didn't have her hair color._

"Hmmm, this one. That's Daddy!" She pointed to Edward and I smiled back at her. I pointed and named the rest of the Cullens for her. She stared at the picture for a long time noting each facial flaw; although they were anything but flawed. She commented on how the couples went together, and that I was right to say Rosalie was very pretty and that Emmett was a little scary looking. But she wasn't scared of him.

"I bet he gives good hugs."

"Yes, he does." I thought about Emmett hugging me. He always squeezed the breath out of me, but now it wouldn't matter. _I'd kill for an Emmett hug._

After about an hour of staring at the picture, Renesmee looked up at me. "Can I… Is it okay… if I take this?"

"Yes baby, that's why I brought you here. You can have whatever you want. I figured a picture would be best since you could see them everyday then." She squeezed the picture and hugged me tightly. I sighed knowing that a picture may be the closest she would come to them anytime soon. _At least she can see them all happy._

***

Renesmee had spent the day in the house going from room to room. She took all the family pictures she could find and insisted on taking a few of Edward's books and CDs as well. I told her we could stay through her birthday and then we'd move to Bainbridge Island. She was really excited.

That night, I decided to go off while she slept. She was perfectly safe there. I wandered around through the woods till I reached the meadow. It was serene, a little over grown but the snow had taken it to a completely different level of beautiful.

I thought about going to see Charlie, even if I just was going to see him sleeping. I decided I couldn't. If I saw him… I would want to hug him and apologize and explain; and I couldn't.

I thought about going to see Angela. I even came as close to going to her house. Her car was gone and there were no new cars. _She probably moved; college for something… maybe she got married…_

I smiled for Angela, but I was heartbroken for myself. I couldn't go to college. Sure I had enough time to do so; I had forever. But I refused to use Alice's money for myself.

And, if she was married_… I'd never be married_. There was no one else for me and I'd never be with him. He didn't want me.

I ran back to the house and laid next to Renesmee. I didn't have the desire to explore without her now. I'd rather watch her see everything for the first time.

The next day I let her explore the meadow and told her stories of my time there. The next day we celebrated her birthday.

We didn't leave the house during the day because I didn't want to risk coming across anyone, but we played games and I read her one of Edward's books. She picked it out and as I read to her, she sighed and giggled and whispered things that she didn't mean for me hear. She wanted to meet him so badly and was truly sad he didn't still live here. I read till she fell asleep and then loaded up the car. When she woke up we left for Bainbridge Island. She cried the whole car ride, and I felt like I wanted to as well.

**A/N: Sorry it took a little longer than I said to update but I had a lot of things to get done yesterday. For some reason it also took longer than I thought to write the chapter. It was kind of a set-up but also had Bella and Renesmee back in Forks for bit. I hoped you all liked it.**

**Next chapter should be up by Friday, sorry I have a full day tomorrow but should start writing soon. Next chapter will be another time-jump, we're getting closer to the 20 year mark! **

**As always, Read, Review, and Ask! I love your comments, keep them coming!**

**~kmwhyte**


	12. Clouds with that Sweet Silver Lining

**Disclaimer: I own nothing when it comes to Twilight or the songs I make reference to. I know… I'm sad too!**

**A/N: Okay readers and friends, I got a good news/bad news situation here. The bad news is that I had a hard time figuring out when I wanted the chapter to take place (I wanted it to come in the middle between Renesmee being two and twenty. Just to be a quick taste of their life before the Cullens reemerge.) With that being said, I ended up cutting it. I just couldn't make up my mind, sorry. **

**But here's the good news, I still have a chapter that explains Renesmee and Bella's life before the Cullens come in play. Plus, it means the Cullens come back earlier, YAY!**

**Okay, this chapter takes place twenty years from the start of the story (Renesmee is 20yrs old :)) **

**RPOV (Renesmee)**

I hit play on my iPod and started singing along.

"_Pink. It's my new obsession. Pink. It's not even a question…"_

I started pulling out my clothes from the boxes to hang up in my closet. I had twice the amount of clothes as mom; and the only reason she had so much was because I was in charge of her wardrobe; she just couldn't admit it to herself.

We had moved to Englewood, a small town in Ohio, about a week ago. Mom actually decided to rent a house this time since we had some money saved up. She had been working part-time jobs during the summers since I turned ten. She was crazy independent and was determined not to spend anymore of Aunt Alice's money. She had even put a lot of the money she had spent back into the "cookie jar fund" that Alice had left us.

Mom had left about an hour ago to explore the town and register us for school. She wanted me to come but I wanted to decorate; and she had no desire to _nest_.

We had created a pretty believable back story over the years. It worked a lot better after I stopped aging. Now that we looked the same age, we actually looked like sisters.

We had created papers that said we were emancipated because our mother died two years ago and our father was in no state to care for us. We used the last name Swan; even though I used the last name Cullen whenever possible.

We made up fake names for 'our parents' on the emancipation forms; we couldn't use Charlie or Renee's incase someone tried to contact them. Both of them thought Mom was traveling in Canada as a low-budget reporter for a newspaper that we made up. They were used to not seeing her anymore and didn't put up much of a fight. At least, that's what she told me.

Our mother's name on the forms was Karen and our father was Mark. I got to choose the names; they were former neighbors when we lived in Bainbridge Island when I was two. They were really nice to me when we passed them on the street and really liked Mom. They always brought food over because they felt bad for the "single mother." We ended up throwing a lot of food away.

I looked over my closet; I had color-coded it out of habit. _I should do Mom's… she'd have a fit._ I laughed as I thought about rearranging her closet. She would only notice _if_ it was color-coded. She wasn't a fashionable person or into clothes, although she didn't dress ugly; just casual, way _too_ casual.

When we were driving to Englewood, I was asking about the potential shopping possibilities. She was smiling to herself as she mumbled 'mini-Alice' over and over again. Apparently whenever I would finally meet my Aunt Alice, we would get along great because of my shopping habits. _I can't wait!_

"_Wicked little girls, kiss the boys and make 'em cry…"_ I continued to sing along with my iPod while looking around my room. It was girly; it killed Mom how girly I was. I loved clothes and fashion, but I also loved being outdoors and could hold my own whenever some stupid guy would practically "stalk" me at school. It happened at least once in every town.

The first few times, Mom scared them completely shitless. It made me feel so embarrassed to have my mom fight my battles, especially since she was pretending to be my sister.

One day she was too far away when this guy, Matt, tried to flirt with me at my locker. I looked at him twice making sure he was who I thought he was. He had a girlfriend, actually, he had two; they just didn't know. I told him I wasn't interested but he was relentless. Finally, I leaned in and whispered in his ear that I would tear him apart, and not in a good way. He looked up confident and then saw my eyes. He walked away quickly. Apparently I inherited the "vampire-stare."

Mom didn't worry as much after that but she also rarely left me alone in public either.

I walked over to my nightstand to get a drink. I had started trying human food about ten years ago and even though I still didn't care for it; there were a few things I would eat or drink. Sprite for one was my favorite beverage, _ever_. I liked it even more than blood. I could drink it forever and probably never get enough of it.

I liked sweet things in general, like cookies and candy. I wasn't fond of spicy or hot foods, so Mexican was completely out. I barely ate meat; it was just a bit of a let down when there was no blood to accompany it. I ate lots of fruits for the most part. _I'm a picky eater…_

I placed the drink back down and looked at the pictures on my nightstand. There were three. One was of me and Mom from when we leaved in Odessa. I had taken it before we left to visit Forks. I had wanted a picture of us with the house. Mom held me close to her chest and smiled more to me than the camera. I loved that picture, it was sweet.

The second was one I got from Aunt Alice's room in Forks. It was of the whole family, minus me; since I wasn't around yet. All the couples were standing together. Grandma and Grandpa held each other's shoulders smiling beautifully. Uncle Emmett had his arms around Aunt Rosalie waist while her head was on his chest. She had a weaker smile than the rest, but still looked happy and content. Aunt Alice was leaning into Uncle Jasper while holding Mom's hand. Dad had his arms around Mom; they both looked so happy.

The last picture was one that I hid from Mom till we left Forks. She had said I could take anything I wanted but I was afraid she might change her mind for some reason. It was a picture I had found in Dad's room. It was of Dad looking at Mom while she slept on his lap. I could tell it was taken on the couch in the Forks house. Mom looked peaceful. Dad looked… grateful.

When Mom found the picture in one of the boxes she didn't say much. She looked at me and smiled but then put it in the box and walked away. I wasn't sure why. I figured she must really miss him.

She never mentioned that photo again and just looked past it whenever she saw it in my room.

"_The spaceman can't get high; I'm coming back to my girl by July…"_

I got lost in the music again and ended up in the living room of the house. I had to put away all of our books and music. It was a task all in it self. _Mom could have done this in no time…_ She was fast, vampire fast. I could run swiftly but I didn't have the ability to move like she did.

We had taken a set of shelves from a house we found abandoned in Syracuse. It held all of our CDs and books; even the educational ones.

Mom had started homeschooling me when I was three since I was so curious. She had me learning everything to the Arizona State Standards in Education. Everything that seniors in high school knew, I knew by the time I was seven. I picked up quickly and started to stump Mom with my questions.

***FLASHBACK***

When I was eight she realized that I wasn't aging anymore. She decided we could enroll in high school from that point on, but we needed good back stories and documents so we never got questioned too much. She had fished out the folder from Aunt Alice and started doing research to be prepared.

After she left to go to the library to e-mail Grandma Renee about her "grad school experience," I went back to the trunk. I had seen it before but never looked inside; Mom didn't open it much. I sat next to it and pulled out the keys. _Did she have another car?_ I laughed and pushed them to the side.

I pulled out a copy of Romero and Juliet. I had read it before and liked the story. When I had asked Mom if she read it, she had changed the subject. I opened it and her name was written inside. _She has it, but hasn't read it? Sure… why'd she lie?_ I couldn't quite place it but I figured she had a reason.

I pulled out a CD next, it wasn't labeled but for some reason I figured I could listen, at least, to part of it before she caught me snooping. I put it into her old CD player and put on the headphones. It was classical, maybe something originally written, but not endorsed for publication. I continued to listen while I shifted the old clothes in the trunk. I felt a piece of paper under a pair of shorts. It was a letter from Aunt Alice… to my Mom.

_Bella,_

_I'm so sorry that my brother can be such an idiot. Scratch that, he's a complete dumbass for leaving you. Believe me when I tell you, he will regret it. In fact, he already does, he just won't admit it yet._

_I'm not sure if you'll find this note. I'm about 86% positive you will. I know, uncertainty is a rarity for me. But I'm having difficulty seeing you now. I have no idea why and I'm not allowed to talk, or think, about you right now so I can't discuss the possible reasons._

_But I am seeing glimpses. Very confusing for me, mind you. First I see that we will meet again. But I have no idea when or where._

_Second, I see that you need my help. Or rather, you need things I can provide. I don't know why you need this stuff, but you know I'd do anything for you. So here is you're big box of goodies!_

_I know you'll need money too so I left some petty cash at the bottom. But in case you get into real trouble, there's a credit card too. I know you will never use it. I don't need my visions to tell me that. But if you ever get into trouble or need me, use it! I'll find you, I promise. And don't worry; he doesn't know any of this. None of then do._

_I don't know why you'll need this stuff but I know you'll be okay somehow. I'm sorry I didn't say goodbye. Remember you ARE my sister._

_Alice_

_By the way, blood's in the fridge. Why you need that, I'll never know!_

I knew Aunt Alice helped us and I knew she left the credit card and money for Mom but… _Dad left Mom when he had a choice? Why?_ It was obvious that Aunt Alice didn't like what he did; but he must have had a reason. Mom said he needed to go because Grandpa had to move for work.

It didn't make sense. And I knew I couldn't ask Mom about it. If this was true, she probably didn't want to talk about it. I had so many questions and decided they were for Aunt Alice. She wouldn't lie to me, I don't why I thought that, but I was certain.

***END FLASHBACK***

I thought a lot about my Dad and family over the years but above all. I wondered if they'd like me. If they'd accept me. If Dad would be a dad. Mom always said they would love me but I just wanted to know for sure. I would've sought them out if I could, but I couldn't leave Mom. She was my rock and I was her everything.

"_I've got a funny little feeling; my arms are shaking like a lightning rod, yeah! I'll cannonball right through the ceiling, and sink my teeth in till the feelings gone, yeah!"_

I kept thinking about Dad, while I cleaned up the empty boxes and took them out to the curb. As I was walking back inside, Mom's Audi pulled up.

"Hey honey! Done unpacking?"

"Yup, everything's put away."

She walked up and put an arm around my shoulder while I wrapped my ear buds around my iPod and put it into my pocket.

"So are we registered?" I knew we were but I figured I'd ask anyways.

"Yes, Renesmee. We're registered and school starts next Monday." She wasn't a huge fan of school, especially high school, either but public school was cheap and we couldn't afford college on her unpredictable, part-time salary; so we just started over every three years and moved to a new town.

"Did you get our schedules?" She always tried to have all my classes with me, but over the years, my interests started to sway away from hers and I wanted to be more independent.

"Yes, we only have two classes together but we have lunch too." She looked disappointed, probably because she couldn't spend time with me while she was bored. I smiled at her.

"We'll deal. Wanna hunt?" I wasn't really hungry but I was tired of being in the house. And I wanted some "Mommy time" with her. I knew she would want the same thing.

"Sure, we can hunt and explore. I'm dying to see the forests around her."

"I'll bet." We ran into the woods that lined the back of our house and started going at full speed as soon as the trees blended behind us.

**A/N: So yeah, it's not a long chapter and I'm sorry for that. I just wanted to set-up Bella and Nes' life after twenty years together a bit. I hope I made everything clear but if I didn't, please let me know. I'm like ten chapters ahead in my head and might miss something. **

**I promise more action is coming! The Cullens are coming next chapter… hehe!**

**Here's a few things that I think might need to be cleared up as well:**

** Jacob may or may not be mentioned in the story. Lots of people have asked and I'm considering mentioning him soon but he won't be involved, unless I totally change my mind or come up with a fantastic idea :)**

** Alice is seeing flashes of Bella but has no idea where she is because she's rarely away from Renesmee. Renesmee is pretty much completely blocking her power.**

** Venom secret will be revealed in the story later, promise :)**

** Renesmee's intelligence was nurtured by Bella. She homeschooled her and taught her things even before that.**

**Okay, I think that's it… BTW THANK YOU to EVERYONE who has reviewed. I have 270 right now and I'm stunned in a fantastic way!**

**As always, Read, Review, and Ask! I love your comments, keep them coming!**

**~kmwhyte**


	13. Can't Breathe Without You, But I Have To

**Disclaimer: I own nothing when it comes to Twilight or the songs I make reference to. I know… I'm sad too!**

**A/N: This chapter takes place about one month after the previous chapter (sometime in late September). Don't freak, you didn't miss anything that you wanted to see.**

**APOV (Alice, is BACK!)**

"Two centimeters higher on the left."

Jasper was hanging one of the newest art pieces that Esme had purchased when she and Carlisle went to Berlin this summer. She had gotten it for Rosalie's room, but I convinced her to give it over to me.

He adjusted the frame in a second and came to stand by me to see his handiwork. "Looks good, what do ya think?"

"I love it, thank you." I kissed his cheek and then lingered wrapping my arms around him. We stood for a few minutes before I felt him stiffen.

"Edward?"

"Edward." _Damnit._ "Alice…" I struggled to control my emotions for Jasper, but Edward was wearing on my last nerve. Every time he came in the house Jasper would feel his despair, guilt, or loneliness and then I would end up with the same emotions. Whether he meant to or not, he was taking my husband away from me.

"I'm really, _really_ getting tired of this." It was an understatement; I was surprised, I hadn't assaulted him yet.

"Alice, he can't control his emotions anymore. It's not just the guilt over Bella; it's the guilt of what he's doing to everyone else, including you."

I breathed deeply, while I glared at Jasper. He wanted me to apologize. I didn't _want_ to apologize. I _wanted _to continue to yell at him. He was being brainless, and now it didn't even matter. Twenty years had gone and passed; it was too late for my vision to come true now.

"Alice, I know you love Bella, but you also love Edward. I know you want to defend her and punish him for her, but that's not what she would want… and you know that."

"I do_ not_ know that." I was trying to push away the calm, forgiving waves he was sending me. "Don't _do_ that!"

"I'm sorry. But you know that Bella would want you to forgive your brother and help him be okay. It's been twenty years; she has to have moved on by now. Let him off the hook." He smiled at me and squeezed my shoulders. "I think it will help. Please, for me?"

I glared at him for several minutes and thought about what he was asking. "You're lucky I love you." I didn't attempt to smile but I knew he felt my acceptance to his plea.

"I know, I'm lucky."

***

I walked out of mine and Jasper's room and walked downstairs to Edward's. Edward was on the first floor while the rest of us were on the second; it worked out for the best the past few years like this. We decided to continue the pattern in Englewood for the next few years as well.

I knocked on his door. "Alice."

_What, no 'come on in Alice' or 'glad to see you, please come in and talk with me?'_ I knew he heard my thoughts and mentally apologized. That's what I came to do after all.

"Can I talk to you, Edward?"

"Why?" We hadn't talked in a while, basically because every time he moped, I purposefully brought up Bella. I was making Rosalie look like the saint of sisterly love.

_About you. And me. And me being a bit of a bitch._

He turned from the window, for the first time looking in my direction. He lifted an eyebrow but he eyes were still unfocused.

_Fine, about me being a huge bitch, happy?_

"Not at all. Go ahead." Short, few word sentences. I was really getting stick of that, too.

"I'm sorry. I'm not saying that I take back anything I ever said or did, but I am sorry that I held out for so long. And I'm sorry you didn't find her." _I'm _really_ sorry about that._

He looked at me but said nothing.

"You're my brother and I'm sorry your suffering but, and I don't mean this to be insensitive, but you looked for her for fourteen years and you never found anything. She… she had to have moved on by now." _That's what you wanted, right?_ I wasn't trying to be cruel. I felt bad that she probably had a life away from him. A life, probably with a husband and kids. But that was what he wanted for her.

"I made a mistake." He looked back to the window and I felt my emotions stray to anger.

_Good God Edward. I swear._

I felt a wave of calm from Jasper; he was in the living room waiting for me. "I'm sorry; I really am but Edward…"

"I know Alice; I have to live with it. Just like I have to live with the fact that I killed people. I have to live with both of those regrets for eternity; among many others"

He was feeling even sorrier for himself now. _Super job, Alice. Fantastic._

"Edward, what can I do?" I was sincere; I really didn't want him to suffer. He deserved to move on as she must have.

"You can't see her anymore, Alice."

"I get glimpses but its weird… she looks the same." I showed him my latest glimpse of Bella. She was sitting in a room with a shabby couch reading a biology book. She looked bored, practically to tears. It was blurry and short, barely worth mentioning.

"That's old; Bella wouldn't look like that anymore."

"I know, but I don't see the past." _I don't understand it either, Edward. I just see what I see._

"She looked beautiful, even more than I remember…"

"Edward." _I may hate it, but you did what you thought was best, and… it was._

"You don't believe that."

"No, I don't. Sorry."

"It's okay, I don't believe it either. I don't know why I did."

"I do, you wanted her to have a normal, human life."

"That was dense."

"Yup." _Sorry…_ My sympatric side had been dormant for a long time.

I stood there staring out the same window Edward was for a few minutes when Edward finally spoke.

"I'm sorry Alice."

"What?" I was confused; I was the one who was apologizing and I wasn't even doing a good job.

"I'm sorry I took her away from you, too; from everyone."

_Thank you, Edward._ It didn't change anything but I appreciated it none the less.

"We need you back, Edward."

"I'll try Alice, just give me the night. I'll really try tomorrow."

"Okay." What else could I say? I couldn't demand he start being the old Edward this very minute. He smirked for a tenth of a second at my comment and then looked back out the window.

"Tell Jasper: I'm sorry and thanks." He knew what made me come to talk to him, but I didn't need Jasper to tell me he didn't care. He wanted to repair what he did, he just didn't know how do to without her, without making it right with her first.

I walked out of Edward's room, shutting the door, and walked over to Jasper sitting on the white couch. _Maybe we should change our preferences next time; I'm a little tired of white. _I sat next to Jasper and put my legs across his lap as I leaned back against the oversized arm of the couch.

"Thank you, Alice."

"Did it actually do any good?" I couldn't imagine it helping in the least. I had snapped at him. I hadn't taken back anything I said. And I pretty much made him apologize to me.

"It helped. He still feels all the emotions for Bella, but not for you. Turns out that was a good chunk of it." Jasper smiled as he rubbed up and down my shins.

"I love you, Alice."

"I love you, too" We sat there for the next few hours while Jasper asked me questions about what I could see about the first day of school. Mainly we talked about our classes and how the students acted towards us. He was nervous every time we started out new, but he wouldn't have any problems with his control here.

***

"Are we ready?" Rosalie called from the front door. She was dressed in tight jeans and a black silk top. I had laid out everyone's clothes for the first day. I couldn't help it; we needed to make good impressions, especially since we were starting after the beginning of the semester.

We decided at the last minute to start the school routine, again. We hadn't done it since Richfort and after Edward left to search for Bella, we merely finished up high school and then just waited. We waited for him to either bring her back with him or for him to tell us to return to Forks; but he never found her. He searched for fourteen years and after that, we merely settled in the most uninhabited places for him.

Most of us traveled as couples. Always having at least two people there to keep him company; not that he wanted it. We just didn't want him running off to the Volturi or something like that.

"I think so, babe." Emmett looked around seeing everyone but Edward. "Well, almost…" It was weird to see Emmett down, but without Edward to tease or banter with, he was losing some of his edge. Rosalie wasn't taking that part very well.

_Edward, please. _I just wanted him to try.

Edward walked out of his room. He was dressed in what I picked out. He had a few notebooks clutched to his chest and pencils stuck into a side pocket in his dark wash jeans. His hair was unruly, which wasn't unusual since he didn't care much for appearance anymore; although it looked the same when he actually used to tame it. He had his car keys hanging from his index finger and swung them every few seconds.

Everyone was gaping at him; trying to lock their jaws so they wouldn't hit the floor.

"Ready?" He wasn't happy, or even Edward-happy, but he was putting in the effort.

_Thanks, Edward._

He nodded his head and walked past us all to get into his new silver Volvo C30. It was a slightly different model than the one he had in Forks. Carlisle and Esme got it before we moved; hoping Edward would get out more.

He got into the driver's seat and put the key into the ignition. He looked at the steering wheel for a few minutes before looking back at all of us; still trying to regain control of our mouths.

"Oh, for the love of… just get in the damn car, before I go back inside." We all ran at vampire speed to the car. We were driving down our driveway within the next ten seconds.

***

We had a lot of overlapping classes this time around, especially Rosalie and Emmett. Every single class they had was together; from auto-shop to independent study at the end of the day. We all had gym together during 3rd period. Jasper and I had four classes together in total.

After 4th period, we all went to lunch and sat at the farthest table away; _just like always._ We all had our props in front of us and made a show the first day of actually eating some. Humans tended to lose interest after a few days of staring at us.

"Guys… I don't mean to be paranoid, but is it just me, or… is no one actually paying attention to us?" Emmett's tone was concerned as he held Rosalie's hand.

I looked around discretely, and too quick for anyone to actually notice. They did seem kind of… otherwise involved.

"I think you're right, Em." I told him, it was a bit creepy.

"There's a first." Jasper muttered under his breath, but Emmett was too concerned to care.

"Edward, what do you hear?" I asked him, although he seemed content to just stare at his pepperoni, 'poison' pizza.

"They aren't thinking of us. One girl, off in the corner, noted we were beautiful. She suspects were relatives."

"Well, yeah. We enrolled as a family." Emmett stated the obvious.

The bell rang and everyone went off in their own direction. Jasper walked me to biology on the way to study hall.

Two feet from the door, I froze. Jasper walked in front of me and pretended to hug me while hiding me during my vision.

I saw Edward. He was talking to a girl. Brown hair, long brown hair. They were outside the school. The girl turned to walk away from Edward and I saw her face.

"Oh my god. It's Bella."

Jasper released his grip and looked at me. "What?"

"It's Bella!" I jumped into his arms, hugging him for dear life. _She's back._

**A/N: Please don't kill me! I'm begging you. I know I promised Cullens but I never promised a Bella/Cullen or Renesmee/Cullen reunion in this chapter. Please, have mercy; I did deliver what I promised.**

**However, I do promise an interaction in the next chapter. Someone meets someone. Please no hate reviews. I promise to deliver.**

**With that said, sorry it's shorter, I just couldn't keep going or we would have stopped at an even worse part. Yeah, it's possible. LOL! Thank you to all of you who reviewed. I reached 300 reviews today which is why you get an early update.**

**As always, Read, Review, and Ask! I love your comments, keep them coming!**

**~kmwhyte**


	14. Stay

**Disclaimer: I own nothing when it comes to Twilight or the songs I make reference to. I know… I'm sad too!**

**A/N: Quick wrap-up since I got a ton of question: Bella and Renesmee started school at the beginning of the year with the rest of the students. About a month later, the Cullens start at the same school. The 'human students' don't really pay attention to the Cullens in the lunchroom and Alice DID get a vision of Bella talking to Edward outside the school. **

**Enjoy Chapter Fourteen!**

**EPOV (Edward)**

I walked to my sophomore English class in a haze. I could hear people's thoughts as I passed, but I didn't pay much attention; they seemed so trivial and I didn't have my siblings around so I didn't need to put on the show that I had this morning.

"_Dang, there's more of them… and the guys are just as hot, wow."_

Trivial, hormone-raged humans were all the same. They were predictable and even more boring now with _her_.

I walked up to the door of Mr. Haschal's English class and looked through the window. The bell had rung, but no one was paying attention, and it seemed that he didn't care much. His thoughts were focused on the concert he was taking his wife to that weekend. _He has interesting taste in music._ Most middle-aged men didn't care for hard, death rock concerts.

I opened the door and heard the usual drivel that accompanied the first day at any new school for any one of us.

"_Holy, man of god!"_

"_Oh, this class just got _so_ much better."_

"_Damn, why can't I have an open seat next to me?"_

"_Wow."_

I pushed my feet forward to teacher's desk and handed him my slip. He read it while looking through his briefcase for a syllabus. "Here's a syllabus and I'll get you an English book tomorrow. You can share with your neighbor for today. Why don't you sit next to…" There weren't many open seats; just one. "Renesmee? Please, raise your hand Renesmee. Have a seat Mr. Cullen."

I looked at the girl he had called Renesmee and she looked like she had gone into shock. Her face was stiff and her mouth was wide open. Her mind was silent for a moment before I heard her start processing her own reaction.

'_Holy crow! That's… no, no. Thoughts, gotta block my thoughts." _How'd she know to block her thoughts?

"_Betty won't stop listening to modern rock, how she hates to be alone. I try to compensate her lack of love with coffee cake, ice cream and a bottle of ten dollar wine she says hey, I rock the Haro sport. I rock the cow girl blues. I rock too fast for love I'm footloose in my Velcro shoes. What's up with Will and Grace? I don't get drum and bass. The future freaks me out…"_

She was singing _The Future Freaks Me Out_ over and over in her mind before she slipped. Five minutes had passed when she finally looked at me and our eyes met.

"_Crap, she's gonna kill me, the eyes… The future freaks me out…"_

_Her _eyes! I knew that color better than any other color on the planet. I had only ever seen those eyes in one person; and her father, of course. Those eyes were Bella's. I sniffed the air, but didn't smell anything familiar; but I also did not smell a human sitting next to me. She had similarities to humans, sure, but it wasn't absolute.

"Who are you?" I breathed just low enough for her to hear.

"_I can't tell you."_ She simply thought her answer and went right back to singing the song in her head.

"What are you?" I hissed my question this time and she jumped next to me.

"_I… can't tell you." _She was hesitant this time. _"After class, _please." She was pleading me to drop it, and I was suddenly aware that we were in class with nineteen other students and clueless teacher that was trying to think about Shakespeare's prose, instead of the rap songs he had listened to in his car this morning.

I watched the clock tick away the seconds, while I listened to the same song over and over in this Renesmee's head. I had been called on twice during class. It wasn't difficult to pick out the right answers from Mr. Haschal's head, but I couldn't keep focus much longer.

_Who is she? Why does she not smell 'human?' Why Bella's eyes? Does she know her?_

My mind was coming to conclusions that made no sense. I instantly thought they were related because of the eyes. Even their lips looked similar, but I couldn't be sure anymore. I hadn't seen her in so long.

The bell rang and I grabbed Renesmee's hand in case she considered fleeing.

"I said, I'd tell you. Let's go."

I escorted her out of the first building and into the second looking for somewhere to talk without prying human thoughts or eyes. She quickly grabbed my wrist and took me back outside. She was thinking something about privacy and then ducked into the back door of the cafeteria. The entire room was empty which made it seem three times as large. All the counters where covered with metal windows; there would be no one observing the conversation.

Renesmee looked at me, still singing the same song, and smiled. She sat down and leaned her head so that I would sit as well. I wasn't sure what to expect. She seemed calmer now but still afraid to reveal her thoughts.

"It's complicated. I shouldn't tell you without talking to her. But…" She was still carefully masking her thoughts.

"Who are you?"

"My name is… Renesmee-"

"Yes, I know that." I was becoming frustrated with her not revealing her thoughts, and then on top of that, she wanted to tell me things that I already knew.

"_Calm down."_ She thought and then opened her mouth to finish her sentence since I had interrupted her. "My name is Renesmee Swan, at least it is here." She gestured around the room, but I could barely process anything after she uttered her last name.

"Hello?" She waved her hand in front of my face several times as I tried to regain my control over my mouth.

"You're… you are… you're her…" I couldn't form the words. She _did_ move on, just liked I 'wanted' her to.

"Yeah, I'm Bella's daughter… and yours." She smiled again but this time it was as wide as her face.

I stared at her blankly. I had no words for what I was thinking.

"_Hi Daddy."_ She thought to me, and all I could think was: impossible.

"That's impossible." I couldn't help by state the obvious.

She giggled. "Nothing's impossible. Come on, you should know that. I can show you, but you can't freak out."

"What, how?"

"Look at my hair, it's yours. Can you just trust me and let me show you?" She ran her hand through her extremely long hair showing me her shiny bronze curls. It was a perfect match for my hair color; the curls, I assumed were inherited from Charlie, were perfect.

"Okay." I was nervous and had no idea what to expect. That feeling only intensified when she put her hand on my cheek. She kept thinking the word 'relax' over and over in her mind. Once her hand was flush with my cheek, I saw what she wanted me to.

I saw her and Bella reading books for school; sitting in a shabby living room. Bella was talking about their classes and asked how she was enjoying her English class. I laughed when she said it was boring because she didn't have anyone to talk to.

"Keep watching, Dad." Renesmee whispered as she moved onto another moment from her memories and I just nodded.

She showed me herself as a little girl, maybe five or six years old, and she was asking Bella about me, her Daddy. Bella looked sad, but told her about me and the family. When Bella's eyes changed from talking about Alice, I removed Renesmee's hand.

"Sorry." She looked down after speaking and I could tell she was afraid I was mad or was upset because she showed me those images.

I placed my index finger under her chin and lifted gently. "No, that's not what I meant. That was… incredible. I just didn't want to see your mom cry; even though she can't." She nodded and I could tell she was relieved. I continued on. "I just don't understand. Not about your power, although I am curious Renesmee. But when… how?" I couldn't form my questions correctly; I simply had too many. Renesmee smiled at me and I saw the smile that was absolutely Bella's.

"A vampire and vampire can't have children, but, Mom figures that a vampire man and human woman can. At least, it worked for you two. I don't really wanna think about it, but yeah." She was pleading in her head for me to ask a different question. _My daughter_ was feeling awkward. I savored in the absurdity of the moment.

"Your mother's here?"

"Yeah, we've been here for about a month. You do realize what she is now, right?" How could I not. She hasn't aged since the last time I saw her and it's been twenty years.

"Yes, I know; but you… What exactly… are you, my lovely girl?" She smiled at the affection in my voice.

"I like to think of myself as a half-breed; Mom doesn't like the term, she prefers hybrid. But basically, I'm half and half. I have blood in my veins, a heart beat, and can eat actual food; but I also drink blood and am immortal."

"You're immortal?" I was so relieved; I had missed twenty years, I didn't want to lose her in the next fifty.

"Yup, you can't get rid of me. I'm almost twenty years old; a few weeks, give or take. But I've been this age for about… thirteen years. The image where I'm asking Mom about you; I was actually two."

I couldn't help but laugh, I had no other reaction. It was glorious, and sad, and overwhelming, and completely ridiculous that she existed, but I couldn't have been more thrilled.

"You okay, Dad?"

"I'm perfect. And as much as I want you to call me Dad." Her whole face lit up. "You should probably call me Edward here." I gestured to the room around us, meaning the school and she nodded, smiling.

"So, the whole family's here, right _Edward_? Aunt Alice and Uncle Emmett and everyone?"

"Yeah, they'll all here. They are going to be shocked." She bit her lip in a completely Bella way.

I suddenly realized twenty minutes had passed and I was keeping her from her next class. I was also missing mine, but I couldn't seem to care. "Your mother would want you in class, I'm sure."

"Probably, but that's not gonna happen. Besides, I got technology, which is a piece of cake, and then World History. I'm willing to ditch. What did you have?" I thought for a minute but couldn't remember. I couldn't remember anything from this morning. I pulled out my schedule and Renesmee immediately took it from me to study. She laughed a nervous laugh and looked at me.

"You're gonna want to go to class now." _"She's in your biology class."_

"Your mother." I hadn't asked it as a question. I was certain I knew who she meant, but I couldn't seem to decide which person I'd rather spend time with right now. I only clarified to buy some time.

"Yeah, she has biology with Mr. Graham too." She looked at me for a long time before speaking again. "Go. I'm gonna ditch the rest of the day. I have a feeling, it gonna be… interesting. Tell her, I'm taking the car."

"You shouldn't ditch." I found myself easing right into the disapproving father tone.

"Oh please." She giggled. "Like you don't ditch. Believe me; I know more than the teacher does."

I laughed as she hugged me. "I've wanted to hug you, Dad, for years. Don't go anywhere, okay?" I held her tighter when she said the last part. She had felt abandoned, I didn't need Jasper to tell me that.

"I promise." She leaned back and then kissed me on the cheek.

"Get to class." She waved goodbye as she snuck out another door and headed to the parking lot.

***

I walked back into the second building, now understanding why Renesmee pulled me back out, to my biology class. _With Bella._

I could see her through the window and she looked… perfect. She just looked simply striking, and not because she was a vampire. _God, I missed her._

I stood just out of sight behind the door and tried to listen for her voice. I heard everyone's mental processing, but not hers. Nearly every student was actually focusing on the lesson, but most were also complaining, internally of course, that it was incredibly boring.

_Now or never, Cullen._ I walked into the classroom and heard the thoughts ranging from shock and fascination to sexual frustration. _Gotta give it up to the teenage girls, they all had one track minds_. I heard Bella gasp behind me and made the effort to not turn around but to go straight to the teacher instead.

He took my slip. "Well, well Mr. Cullen, late the first day when you already have missed so much; what an impression." Mr. Graham frowned disapprovingly and I had to bite my lip so I didn't smirk. I would have missed every class if I could have spent more time with _my daughter_.

"Go ahead and take a seat in the back." There were three seats in the back available and one was directly behind Bella. She stared at me while I walked back to the seat and she shifted slightly when she realized I hadn't continued on to the other seats.

"Bella." I breathed it so no one would hear. She let go of a breath that she probably was holding since I first walked into the classroom. I didn't know where to start. Should I admit I knew about Renesmee? That I was sorry that she had to care for her alone? Or should I continue with the speech that I had practiced time and time again when I was searching for her; it was the speech that I hoped would win her back.

"Not now, Edward." She nearly hissed the comment and I was taken aback. "After class."

There was only fifteen minutes of class left in the hour since I had been so wrapped up with staring at her through the door.

Once the bell rang, I waited for her to move. She sat completely still as all the students rushed out for their final classes. I gathered my stuff and walked to her desk. Her eyes were closed and, if I hadn't known any better, I would have thought she was sleeping.

"Bella?" Students began coming in for 7th period biology.

"Miss Swan, Mister Cullen, please go to your next class." Mr. Graham looked annoyed with me already._ He's not going to like me at all._ And just like he read my own mind, he thought "_God, I already hate that kid."_

Bella gathered her stuff and placed her books into her bag. She walked out the back door of the building and rounded the corner of the gym. I kept up easily, even though her speed started to appear the closer she got to the gym.

We were away from all of the students, standing where some woods bordered the back of Northmont High School. She was wearing clothes very similar to her original style. The only difference was they may have been higher quality.

After what felt like hours of silence, Bella took a deep breath and spoke very quietly. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm receiving an education." It was sarcastic but I couldn't understand her question; well, actually I couldn't understand why she asked it. I thought there were more pressing matters to discuss, for example: us and our daughter. But still I remained silent.

"You don't seem that surprised to see me." It wasn't a question and I could tell she had a theory.

"I am surprised. But a little bird told me to expect it."

"Alice?" She knew it wasn't Alice, I could tell by her tone.

"No."

She stared for a long time, although it was probably only a few seconds. "Renesmee." Again, it wasn't a question, she knew the answer.

"Yes. Why didn't you tell me?"

Her eyes flashed for a second and I knew she was trying to control her thoughts. She wasn't sure if I hearing them or not. After a moment without a reaction from me, she relaxed. She was obviously relieved that she was still immune to my power.

"You _left_ me. Excuse me, if I didn't tell you you're a father."

"I didn't mean it like that." I dropped my head. This wasn't what I wanted. I wanted to hold her. I wanted to tell her I loved her and that I was sorry. "I can explain."

"Please do." Her words were polite but her tone was anything but.

"I lied."

"What?"

"I lied to you. I lied when I told you I didn't want you. I lied when I told you I didn't love you. I want you. I love you. I always have."

"What?" Her face was cold and looked confused. I started stepping closer to her but she took a few steps back in return to mine.

"I lied because I wanted to protect you from my world."

She laughed. _Why is she laughing? This can't be good._

"You lied to protect me from _your_ world. You told me you didn't love me and that you didn't want me because you wanted to protect me from _your_ world. Well that plan worked out _fabulously_, Edward." The sarcasm was thick.

"Bella-"

"No." She held up a hand and I immediately froze. "Don't even say anything right now." She was growling. _Bella _was_ growling_. "I don't care about what you want to say right now. Yes, we have a daughter, but that is all we have together." My heart broke. "Be a father to her and I will deal with it but beyond that… we're done. We've been done for twenty years."

She turned away from me and ran into the woods. I wanted to call after her. I wanted to run after her. But my feet were cemented to the cold ground.

**A/N: Did I deliver or what? LOL! **

**Okay, I am updating early because I felt so bad about teasing everyone, plus all of you took it really well and only one person threatened me; with rotten tomatoes no less, ;) **

**I'm gonna try to update ASAP but I think I'm done writing for the day. So enjoy!**

**BTW, I was really inspired to write this part by the song "Stay" by SafetySuit. The lyrics explain it all: ****"Something must have made you say that; what did I do, to make you say that to me. Something must have made you so mad; what can I do, to make you say come back to me."**

**As always, Read, Review, and Ask! I love your comments, keep them coming!**

**~kmwhyte**


	15. You Can Be The Light

**Disclaimer: I own nothing when it comes to Twilight or the songs I make reference to. I know… I'm sad too!**

**RPOV (Renesmee)**

I had been home for just over six hours now. I was practically bouncing out of the armchair. I had cleaned my room, the living room, the kitchen, Mom's room, and the bathroom; not that the last one really mattered, he wouldn't be using it. I cleaned everything I could trying to make a good impression.

6:03pm. _Only 57 minutes._

I couldn't think of anything else to get done, so I just sat… and waited.

6:05pm. _Only 55 minutes._

***Flashback***

I got back to school just as Mom was running into the trees. _Where is she going?_

Dad turned around to look at me. I smiled as I got out of Mom's car and walked over to him.

"Where'd she go? Why'd she leave?"

"I think… I think I startled her. She was surprised to see me and I think she needs some time to herself."

"What'd she say?"

"…Just that she was surprised… I thought you were ditching?" He changed the subject and although he fully knew I was suspecting something might have happened, he didn't mention it.

"I got all the way home and decided I didn't want to wait till tomorrow to see you. I was wondering if you wanted to come over for dinner." The minute I said it, I knew how stupid I sounded. He was a vampire, and so was Mom, and I wasn't exactly a normal human being either; we don't eat 'dinner.' We hunt and drink blood. I may be able to eat human food but that didn't mean that I wanted to all the time…

I kept going on and on with my own little tangent when Dad finally stopped me and laughed. "I would love to come over and have 'dinner,' Renesmee. But I think we can just visit and talk some more."

"Okay." _Thanks._

"No thanks necessary, I want to spend time with you."

I smiled hugely; I knew my cheeks were dimpling but I didn't care. "Seven?"

"Sounds good. Wanna tell me where you live so I don't have to track you and your mother?"

I laughed as I held my hand up to his cheek. He barely reacted and simply watched me show him my drive home from school. He laughed again when I retracted my hand. "Okay, I'll see you at seven."

I said goodbye and kissed him on the cheek. He laughed as he waved to me while I pulled away from the school.

***End Flashback***

I heard Mom walking up to the door muttering to herself, but I couldn't understand her words.

"Renesmee?" She called when she opened the door. I knew that tone. That was the "what did you do" tone. _Crap, what _did_ I do? Besides meet Dad and invite him over for "dinner."_

"Hey Mom, what's up? Did you go hunting?" I called to her and she replied with a short "yes" before entering the living room.

I smiled at her, but her glare told me to explain what had happened before she lost her control. "I'm guessing you're wondering why Dad knew about me." She nodded. "And you're probably wondering why I didn't come to you first." Again, she nodded. "Plus you're probably pretty curious what I told him; I'm just guessing."

She nodded but then she decided to talk as well. "I'm very confused, Renesmee. I didn't expect to see your father when he walked into my biology class. He was not surprised though. What happened?" She was calm, but it was that crazy-calm mood that she gets in when I have some serious explaining to do. For instance, I got this exact reaction after I snuck out of the house on a sunny day to go to school, without her. She wasn't really mad, but was more… focused; focused on why in the world I would do that and how she felt about it.

"Well, I was in English and he walked in. I panicked when I saw him, and he heard my thoughts. I tried to hide them, but he got suspicious."

"Of course." She wasn't being sarcastic; she actually looked a little frustrated.

"He tried to ask me questions but I told him to wait till after class. We went to the lunchroom during 6th period and I just… I had to tell him. Mom, it's Dad. I had to tell him. I know I should've told you first, but I just wanted him to know who I was."

She looked at me for a few minutes. Her mouth was moving but I wasn't getting anything of consequence with her rapid, vampire speech. Finally, she talked normally. "I know honey. I understand. I just really wish… I hadn't been surprised. I was _really _surprised to see him."

"I know, me too, but isn't it great! He's here, he's back; they're all back. I can't wait to see them all. I can't wait for Dad to come over." I looked at the clock; 6:54pm. _Six minutes!_

"What do you mean, come over?" She looked like she was trying to stay calm; trying not to overreact.

"I um, I invited him over for dinner, tonight." _Oh crap, I didn't think she'd mind._

"What!? Renesmee, none of us even eat dinner."

"Well, I could if I liked it." The mom glare was back.

"That's not what I mean, Renesmee. Why didn't you ask me?"

"I… I didn't think you'd mind, and you ran away when I went to ask him so I just… wait, Mom, why did you run away from him?" I had completely forgotten that I wanted to ask her about that. I always thought she'd be thrilled when we found him. She always told me she loved him. _I always thought she'd be so happy but maybe I misunderstood, maybe the letter was something I should have asked about. Maybe I didn't know some things; maybe I didn't have the full story._

"…I was in shock, Renesmee. I didn't know what to say to him; what did he say?"

"Nothing, he said he caught you off guard and that you needed time. Why do you need time?"

"Twenty years is a long time not to see someone, Renesmee." It wasn't an answer, and I knew she was avoiding the question. I didn't want to push, but…

"Mom, what's-"

_Knock-knock._

"Dad! I'm coming!" I ran to the door and opened it to see _my_ Dad standing outside, looking kind of… nervous. _Hi Dad!_ I thought as I hugged him.

"Hi Renesmee." He relaxed and laughed.

"Come in, come in." He walked into the foyer and stopped at the entryway to the living room. His eyes met Mom's and he stiffened. But as soon as my thoughts registered it; he relaxed again.

"Hello, Bella."

"Hi, Edward." _Weird._ They were being formal and didn't make any move to get closer. I could see Dad was trying to think fast for something to say but he was simply stuck. Again, he registered my thoughts, but instead this time he looked at me and smiled.

"Okay, I'm gonna go upstairs and work on my story for creative writing. Why don't you visit with your Dad, Renesmee? Just call me if you need something." She started to walk away but I caught her arm.

"Wait, Mom, don't you wanna-"

"No, I have to finish that story. It's due tomorrow and I wasn't in class today to work on it so I'm gonna get it done now. Just visit with your Dad, honey."

Unless she had another story due, she was lying. The _only _story that was assigned in her creative writing class was due next Tuesday, and she was already finished with it. She wrote about a single mother moving all over the country by herself; she wasn't really one to come up with original ideas, but she could embellish like no one else.

Mom walked up the stairs at a human pace while I looked back at Dad. "Sorry, I didn't know she had a story due."

He just nodded and while I guessed that he was well aware of my confusion, he didn't acknowledge it.

"Come on, I want to show you my room." I took his hand and dragged him through the kitchen and into my bedroom.

"Wow. You certainly are girly, Renesmee." I laughed. I had become obsessed with stars over the past few years and I had stars of every color all over my sheets, comforter, and furniture. The majority of them were of the pink and purple variety.

"Yeah, a bit."

"And you like clothes." He said taking in my overflowing, color-coded closet. "Alice is gonna love you."

"I hope so. Mom makes fun that I'm just a 'mini-Alice.' She said that I would be her new favorite shopping buddy whenever we met." _I'm guessing she really had to force Mom to go with her._

"Yes, she wasn't a fan of shopping, but she did love spending time with Alice." He looked past my closet to my nightstand. "I haven't seen that picture in… in so long. Where'd you get it?" He lifted up the picture of him with Mom sleeping in his lap.

"From your room, in Forks. We went back for my second birthday and Mom said I could have anything I wanted. I found that in your room, in one of the drawers."

"You were in Forks?" He looked at me quickly.

"Yeah, we were only there a few days. Why?"

"I… I just can't believe you went back there. I wouldn't have thought she'd go back after she left." He put the picture back down on the nightstand and looked at the other two pictures there.

"I took that one from Aunt Alice's room." I pointed to the family photo, minus me, and he nodded. "And that's one of me and Mom at one of the abandoned houses we stayed at in Odessa, when I was about two." He picked up the photo and lightly brushed my face and Mom's with his finger.

"Abandoned houses?" He kept looking at the picture while he asked.

"Yeah, Mom didn't want to spend Aunt Alice's money if she could help it, and we always found somewhere where we could stay for a while before we needed to move."

"Wait, Alice left you money?" He looked up suddenly.

"No, she left Mom money. Before I was born. She saw that Mom would need it."

He put the picture back down and started muttering to himself. I could barely understand a word of it, but I was able to pick up "stupid, vampire pixie."

_Dad? What's wrong?_

"Nothing, I just didn't know. I'm wondering how much Alice knew that she didn't tell me." He was mad; or at the very least, very frustrated. "Its fine, I'll talk to her later tonight. I'm sure she'll be waiting."

"Did you tell them you were coming?"

"No, I didn't go home with them and I left the keys to my car for Alice in her locker."

_Why didn't you tell them?_ I was scared that he didn't want me to meet them; that he thought they wouldn't like me.

"Renesmee, no, silly girl." he placed his hands on my shoulders. "_Your_ family is going to love you. Everyone will be excited to meet you, maybe a little confused, but very excited; I'm positive. It's just that I have only known you for all of seven hours now and I don't want to share you yet. I've missed twenty years; I've missed you growing up. Whether I knew or not does not make this any less emotionally-demanding. As soon as you meet them, you won't want to spend time with me and I'm afraid I'm going to be selfish tonight." He smiled at me, hoping, I'm sure, that I would understand.

_I'm good with that. _I wanted to cry, _my_ Dad wanted to spend time with me. _My _Dad loved me and didn't want to lose anymore time with me. I could stand to wait a little bit to meet the rest of my family. They weren't going anywhere and then I'd just get more introductions after I've had some "daddy" time with him.

"Of course I love you, Renesmee. And I absolutely want 'daddy' time with you." He pulled me in for another hug and I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes.

I stood back from him and wiped my eyes hastily. _Wanna see some pictures?_

"I would love to."

We walked back into the living room and I pointed to the couch for him to sit while I went to get a photo album. I grabbed the blue suede scrapbook and sat next to him.

"You scrapbook?" He questioned, lifting an eyebrow.

"No, I just like the pretty paper. I stick the photos to it." I laughed. I had no patience for the cropping, embossing, and, all-together, creativeness of scrapbooking but I loved the designs that were on the various papers.

He laughed and then helped me flip open the cover. "You look beautiful honey. When is this?"

_First day of school; high school. But it was my first day of school all together. I couldn't really go when I was aging so quickly._

"So how old were you?"

"Eight."

"Wow. So you've looked like _this _since then?" He looked genuinely stunned. I had to admit, it was weird.

"Yeah. Actually, since I was about seven and a half. It scared Mom that I was growing so fast, but she tried to not mention it to me. She never admitted how scared she was till I stopped growing. Then she was good; more relaxed." I laughed; she had been more than good, she was freaking overjoyed. She said she was about ready to bite me, but she wasn't sure what it would do to me.

"Wow." I turned the page. The album wasn't in order at all. I had actually made this album from pictures that I just loved. I had intended it for myself as just a reminder of my favorite photos, but now it was more for Dad and his family so they could know me. I wanted them, desperately, to know me. I also wanted to know them just as much. "What about this one, you look about twelve?"

"Yeah, I look twelve, but I was almost five. We were in Florida for the summer. We stayed inside a lot, but it rained so much that we got to go out quite a bit. We just couldn't go very far in case the sun decided to show. Mom wanted me to see a beach, so we went at night. It's hard to see, but you can see the waves here." I pointed to that dark picture. The flash didn't light anything, except for me and I actually looked a little neon because of my skin.

"You were in Florida?"

"Yeah, we went to Cape Coral and went to Sanibel Island to go to the beach. The sand was so white; I wish I could have seen it during the day. It probably reflected forever."

Dad sighed and turned the page again.

We looked at all the pictures and I showed him a few of my memories from different times to fill in the blanks for him. We talked till about ten thirty before I started yawning, very conspicuously.

"You're tired, I'm keeping you up."

"No, I just had a long day; meeting you and all. I'm good." I tried to shrug it off, but he seemed to see right through it. _Damn, I almost forget that you can read my thoughts._

"Yeah." He nodded; then pressed on. "I should go and let you sleep."

"I don't want you to go, Dad. I just got you."

"I'm not going anywhere, besides back to my house, but I'll see you tomorrow; I promise." He said it forcefully like he was making a promise to himself instead of me.

_Can you stay and talk to me before I fall asleep?_ I didn't want to lose him yet and was looking for any reason to keep him with me just a little bit longer.

"Sure. Go get ready and I'll put this back." I ran to my room, while he put the photo album away, and changed into my flannel star pajamas; they matched my bed sheets perfectly.

_Ready._

He walked into my room and laughed as he pulled the blankets over my arms and sat at the edge of my bed. "What's so funny?"

"I just never imagined I would be tucking in my daughter; that I had a daughter." I smiled back at him. "So what do you want me to talk about? Since you need to sleep, I should probably do all the talking."

"Hmm, why don't you tell me about Mom when she was human. I can't imagine it. How was she different?"

He sighed and then got comfortable leaning against my headboard. "Your Mom was just as beautiful as she is now. She had more color in her face and blushed constantly, but she was still the most beautiful person in the world."

_You really loved her._

"I have, and will, always love your mother. She is one of the kindest people I know. She was nice to everyone she met; even the people that took an extraordinary amount of patience. She took care of people and expected nothing in return. She didn't care about people's flaws and accepted them for who they were. She used to hate Forks, you know? She thought it was rainy and cold and far too green, but she moved there for her parents and never regretted her decision because it was best for them. She was selfless…"

He continued to tell me all the qualities about Mom from when she was human. Most things I knew were still true. He told me about the way she looked and her human quirks; who would have known she was a huge klutz? It made sense though; she would go out of her way to help people like that and now I knew why. It didn't take long for me to fall asleep. His voice was so peaceful; I couldn't keep my eyes open.

**A/N: Okay this is just part one of this night. Aren't you just in love with Renesmee? I really hope you liked the chapter. I don't have much to say, except I stayed up to 2am (which is sooo late for me) just to write this chapter. 400 reviews really got me inspired.**

**FYI, I promised at least one person in one of my review-reply that there would be a BPOV in this chapter. I'm sorry the chapter was going to be double the length and I didn't want to overshadow Renesmee so that will be the next chapter. I'm already working on it.**

**As always; Read, Review and Ask Questions if you have them. :)**

**~Kmwhyte**


	16. I'm Sure That You Had Your Reasons

**Disclaimer: I own nothing when it comes to Twilight or the songs I make reference to. I know… I'm sad too!**

**I'm spoiling you all with my constant updates, don't get used to it ;)**

**BPOV**

I stayed in my room the entire evening. My story for creative writing was done; it had been done for the last three days. I tried to think of another excuse to avoid Edward but I was drawing a blank with such short notice. _Renesmee…_

From the moment I ran into the woods to get away from him at school I had been asking myself the same question. _Why did I just say that to him?_

Did I mean it? _Absolutely._ Did I believe what I said?_ Hell yeah._ Should I have said it? _…_

Yeah, there was the problem. I couldn't decide if I should have said what I really felt; especially that harshly and right when I first say him again. I was pissed; don't get me wrong, I was beyond pissed. He lied to protect me from _his _world and here I was a vampire with _his_ child because of _him_. I didn't regret it; I never, _ever_ regretted anything that led to Renesmee. I would do it all over again to get her and be exactly where we are now, but… damn.

I ran straight through the woods up to Cuyahoga Valley National Park in Cleveland. It would take about an hour and a half to get there and then the same for when I decided to go back. I didn't care though, I needed to hunt. I needed to let go of some of the rage I was feeling and simply be alone with my thoughts.

I had prepared myself to meet him again someday. I was prepared to explain about Renesmee and how I came to be a vampire. I was prepared for seeing him again everyday after that. Hell, I had even prepared myself to see him with a wife; a mate. But I was nowhere near prepared for him to tell me he was still in love with me; that he never stopped loving me. I was just not prepared for _that_.

_Damn him!_

The minute he said he still loved me, I was livid. And I wasn't just livid at him; I was livid at myself because at that moment I knew how much I wanted him to be telling me that. I wanted him to love me and want me and say those things to me. It made me so god damn angry though. He had no right to leave and then twenty years later, come back and have me take him back like nothing happened. It was just too easy, for him. He got to go off and have a limitless lifetime of good times and then find me eternally eighteen, and then just decide that we should get back together. It's not like he actually looked for me or came back for me. I knew it was ridiculous but I didn't care, I was simply furious with him.

I took down a hefty buck. I drained in less than a minute. I smashed the carcass into the ground after I finished and then repeated the process with two other adult deer. All of a sudden, I smelled a more delicious scent. _Coyote. _They were protected here and I never went after them, but damn I was tempted. I ended up shattering a large maple tree that I could barely wrap my arms around before I fled home. I aptly named the tree Edward; it was the closest I would get to inflicting physical pain on him.

I stewed upstairs in my freshly cleaned room for a long time listening to Renesmee tell Edward stories about our life over the years. I could tell he was listening to her thoughts because there were many unasked questions being answered between them. _Thank God he can't hear me; thank God!_ I thought for certain he would be able to decipher my mental silence now that I was a vampire and I was more than pleasantly surprised when I found him having no reaction to the names I was shouting at him during our brief encounter at school. I wanted to remain a mental mute, especially with him.

I heard Renesmee get into bed and Edward telling her stories of me as a human. _Seriously?_ He was telling her how great I was and that I had all these 'amazing' qualities as a human. I had been mean and then avoided him all night, and he was regaling our daughter with how wonderful I was when he met me.

_Damn him._

I walked downstairs and heard Renesmee's heavy breathing. She was fast asleep but I could still smell Edward's… delectable scent strongly coming from her room. When I walked to in, I saw Edward standing in the middle of the floor watching her. _He must have been leaving and then lost himself in her like I always did._ She was so easy to love. It was like you couldn't help it. I had a feeling that even if she wasn't my daughter I would feel a pull to her; to love her and protect her from anything that would cause her harm.

I watched him for a few minutes; he had to know that I was there, but he just didn't want to look away from her. It was hard for me to imagine what this must be like for him. He found out, only mere hours ago, that he had a twenty year old daughter with his high school, human girlfriend. As mad as I was, I felt sympathy for the loss I'm sure he felt.

"She hates to be watched while she sleeping. She claims it creeps her out."

"Sorry, I uh… I just can't believe I haven't known her for twenty years. I just want to know her. I want to know everything about her." He was genuine and I gave right into it, for her.

"She's a girly-girl. She loves fashion. She's totally a 'mini-Alice.' But she loves the outdoors and always comes with me to hunt when she knows I'm going, even though she doesn't go as often since she can live off of human food. She just loves to see the nature of it all." He nodded.

"Her favorite color is russet brown, but she claims its fuchsia because it's girly and brown isn't." She tended to buy me more brown tops than any other color since she knew I would wear them, but she would always end up 'borrowing' them from me later. "Till she was three, the only human food she would even attempt to eat was bananas; it's still her favorite food." He nodded again; encouraging more information from me, so I continued.

"She is obsessed with music, and even though she loves all the popular, top 40 hits; she actually prefers to discover the music that nobody likes yet. She has quite a variety of taste ranging from rock to country, classical to alternative. She even likes rap and R & B. She found a CD with your compositions on it, and she listens to one before she goes to bed almost every night." I knew it was the CD that Alice left in the trunk, but I wasn't ready to have that conversation with him. He started to speak, but I pressed on.

"Since she was four, she has believed in all things mythical. She claims that if vampires exist, then so do mermaids, ghosts, fairies, and werewolves." He laughed but I couldn't find it in me to ask why.

"She reads mysteries and science fiction for fun, although she has read all of the classics because I love them. She claimed they were too 'old' for her, but her favorite book is actually Romero and Juliet. She declares she finds the classic Shakespeare language _interesting_, but she once said it's all about the love story; that it reminds her of you and me."

I hadn't meant to go that far. I just wanted to tell him things that a parent should know; things that she wouldn't think to share with him. Things that he would have to learn over time, but the time had already passed.

He turned around to speak but I started first.

"You should go." I didn't mean it to be mean and I said it as flatly as I could. I just knew he should.

I walked out of Renesmee's room and to the foyer to see him out. As he approached, I opened the door; he stopped though.

"Bella…"

"Don't. I'm sorry I went off. I was just…"

"I know, I was shocked too. But you didn't have any warning like I did."

"No, I didn't." We stood there for a few minutes. We impersonated statues very well.

"Bella, I'm sorry. I had no idea the mistake I was making when I left. There's no excuse but I have to say it. I love-"

"Please, don't." I had to make it clear. I had to tell him there was no 'us.' I needed him to know I was glad he was here, but for Renesmee. "I am sorry I yelled at you today."

"I would have used the verb, growled, but okay." He joked. _Seriously, he was joking right now?_

"Fine, I'm sorry I growled at you today. But, I am glad you're here. Renesmee has been obsessed with meeting you for the last… eighteen years, and I'm sorry you didn't know about her. I don't know how I could have changed that, or even if I would, but I am sorry. And I'm sorry because I wanted her to myself and just never felt the desire to change that. It was selfish.

"She's the most important thing in my world and she always comes first. That's why I'm glad you're here; why I'm glad you all are here. For her. I have missed you all too, but Edward… there's no us. It's just too late."

"Bella-"

"Please." I needed him to accept it. "Please, be her Daddy, she's wanted that for _so long_. We're her parents and I want to be your friend. I have missed you, but we're not _us_ anymore."

I opened the door further, hoping he would take my subtle hint and go home. "I'll see you Wednesday, Edward."

"Wednesday?"

"Yeah, tomorrow's a sunny day. I don't know about you, but we were planning on ditching tomorrow." I tried to lighten the mood and also hint that I wanted him to leave by opening the door further still.

"I guess I would have known that if I had talked to Alice." He looked at his phone and I could see the flashing screen. _82 unread messages, 14 new voicemails._ "Joy. She must be dying to get a hold of me."

I reached to my back pocket and pulled out my wallet. "Here, you told Renesmee you wanted time with her before she met your family. I'm sure Alice is going out of her mind with questions. Why don't you show her a photo?" I handed him a pretty recent picture of Renesmee.

"Thank you, you mind if I keep it; till I can get a few pictures of my own?" His eyes were so dazzling I was having a hard time concentrating.

_Damn him._

"Sure, keep it. I got others."

He nodded and then looked up at me with a gigantic smile plastered to his face. "Why don't you and her come over tomorrow? She can meet everyone and you can see them all again. I'm guessing you didn't see any of your family today. I can come and pick you two up." I didn't miss the 'your family' when he spoke it, but I certainly wasn't going to use it.

"No, I didn't see _your_ family today. I'm sure Renesmee would love to meet them though. Why don't you come pick her up around ten; she should be up by then?" I knew he would pick it up that I wasn't intending to join them, but he didn't mention it. I'm sure he was planning something, but I couldn't seem to care. He said 'goodnight' and headed to his car; but not before managing an admiring glance as my own car.

_Damn him._

**A/N: Okay, I know it's a little shorter, but again this is only part two of this particular night and there is still a part three. Bet you're dying to know who's in that one, huh?**

**Thank to everyone who reviewed, I'm glad everyone is liking the story!**

**Here's your homework: Send me questions! (PMs, if possible) I want questions that the Cullens should ask Renesmee and Bella when they all meet. I know what's going to happen but I don't want to miss something important and then hate my chapter, and it will probably be a VERY long chapter as it is (Ch18). Please and Thank You!**

**And as if you care, I must say that I had a horrible time choosing a chapter title. Several songs worked and here are the alternates; Under Control by Parachute, Not Ready to Make Nice by The Dixie Chicks, White Horse by Taylor Swift and Already Gone by Kelly Clarkson. If you care, let me know which one you liked or if This Boy by James Morrison works since Bella and Edward are both represented. Otherwise disregard my internal struggles, :) **

**As always, Read, Review, and Ask! I love your comments, keep them coming!**

**~kmwhyte**


	17. Missing You

**Disclaimer: I own nothing when it comes to Twilight or the songs I make reference to. I know… I'm sad too!**

**APOV**

I read Edward's note, again.

_I'm sure you saw something. Just let me have some time to deal with it. Don't tell anyone about her. I'll explain what I can when I get home. It's complicated._

_Edward_

_Of course, it's complicated!_ Bella is back; then she disappears from my visions, like she always does. Then on top of that, I get this damn note with his car keys. And then he disappears shortly after. _I'm going out of my mind here!_

"Alice, what's going on?" I pocketed the note and looked up from the front steps I was sitting on to see Jasper leaning in the doorframe. "You're tense and frustrated; I'm guessing Edward is lying about something."

"No, not lying; he's just flat-out not telling me anything at all." I looked back to the ground and slumped down; in a very human way.

"Is it about… you know who?" I had already explained that we couldn't say anything to the rest of the family yet, per Edward's request, so we weren't mentioning Bella's name anywhere near the property.

"Yes, I think he's with her, but I can't _see_. And he's not answering my messages!"

"Just calm down, _please_?" I heard the need in his voice.

Between my emotions, the family's confusion, and his own sympathy for me; it was draining him.

"Okay… oh! It's about time!" Just as I tried to relax, I saw Edward driving up the street in _my_ car. He swiped it from the house while I was in my World History class; I nearly screamed his name when I saw it happening. "I'll be back, promise; but I want to catch him before he gets too close." I kissed his cheek and ran to meet Edward.

***

_Do you _not_ know how to answer a call or text message?!_

He pulled the car over and I got into_ my own car_ to talk to him. "Sorry Alice, I was preoccupied."

_I'll bet._

"You saw her." He knew I had, so he didn't even bother to form it as a question.

"Of course, I saw her. Although, now I _can't_. As soon as she walked away from you, I lost her. Then I saw her hunting; I was going to go after her, but I didn't recognize the place; we haven't been here long enough to venture far to hunt yet. Then I couldn't see either of you the entire night; what's going on?"

"Wait, you haven't seen me at all tonight?"

_No! That's what I just said!_

"You didn't see Renesmee either?" His brow furrowed and he looked confused.

"Who is Renesmee?" _What is a 'Renesmee?'_

He quirked a smile and looked at me. "Renesmee… is my daughter; me and Bella's daughter."

_What? Vampires don't have kids. Vampires _can't_ have kids. And even if they did, you need to have sex to have a kid. And Bella and Edward never… I mean, I would have seen; even though I wouldn't have wanted too. Still, I would have seen it happen, or at least progress to that… _

_No, it doesn't matter, even if they did, vampires can _not_ have children, they just can't. We would have known this. Carlisle would have known; Rosalie and Esme would have jumped at the chance…_

"Alice."

_No, it's impossible. Vampires cannot reproduce, it's a physical impossibility. Bella and Edward couldn't have a daughter. _I sat there for several minutes arguing the fact that Edward and Bella couldn't have a child to myself when Edward finally knocked me out of my reverie.

"Alice! We have a daughter. I wouldn't have believed it either… but… we do. Just trust me on it. She was conceived the typical way, okay? The night before Bella's birthday. I don't know why you didn't see it, but I'm rather glad you didn't. Hopefully Carlisle can figure out how exactly it is possible, but Bella believes that the whole 'female human' fact was the key to that question. But honestly, I haven't had time to consider it."

_You really have a daughter?_

He smiled; that smile was the largest one he's produced since we left Forks. "Yes." He shifted in his seat to pull out a picture. He handed it to me. "She's stunning, isn't she?"

_Oh my…_

I looked at the girl in the picture. She looked about seventeen years old. Her hair was in ringlets; colored bronze just like Edward. Her eyes were the beautiful chocolate brown that we all loved; just like Bella's used to be when she was human. Her lips were full, especially her bottom lip. She looked so much like Bella. If not for the bronze curls, they could have passed for twins. Their size and built were nearly identical. _She has your nose._

"Yeah, I noticed to; I'm not sure that is a good thing though."

"No, it fits her face perfectly. She's prefect. There is no way she could ever be conceived as anything but."

He nodded and smiled a very proud smile. He was truly overjoyed that he was hers; it was obvious.

"So when do I get to meet her? You're not gonna make me wait months like when you first met Bella, are you?"

He laughed. "No, I don't think she would put up with that. She's already so excited to mean all of you; especially you."

_Me? She's excited to meet me?_

"Yeah, Bella told her about your shopping habits and she's eager to go with you. She's quite the girly-girl." He laughed again.

"Oh, that will absolutely be happening. Oh, I love her already; and she has good taste in clothes." I said as I handed him back the picture. "So, when do we get to meet her?"

"Tomorrow; I'm picking her up, but you can't tell them yet. I want them to see her when they hear about her. She seems almost impossible till you see her yourself. And she can explain herself better than I can."

"What do you mean, she can explain better? You're hiding something from me." I was already annoyed that I couldn't see her. Add the fact that he was keeping things from me and I may rip his head off. He can spend the next week trying to find it in the woods and then figuring out how to reattach it.

"Let some things be a surprise, Alice." He said calmly while looking out the window.

"Her whole existence is a surprise to me, Edward!" He laughed and I decided to let him reveal his own daughter in his own time frame. He nodded a silent 'thank you.'

"Okay, so Bella and Renesmee are coming here tomorrow. I suppose I can keep a secret for that long." I bounced in my seat; up until I saw Edward looking down at his lap.

_What?_

"I don't think Bella is coming. She… she made it sound like she wasn't." He was frowning, I didn't understand. I saw in my vision that she looked upset, but that was probably just the shock of seeing him again after twenty years. She loves him.

"Why wouldn't she come, Edward?"

"She's not happy with me. She's really upset with me… She doesn't love me."

"Of course she does, she's just mad because you behaved like an ass. You left her, pregnant and alone; she's pissed. You can't blame her for that." _I won't let you blame her for that, Edward._ I scowled at him with disapproval.

"I don't blame her, Alice, but she made it perfectly clear that she doesn't want me. She just wants me to be there for Renesmee. She said that we could be friends." Edward was morose, again, as he laughed without humor at the last statement.

_Damn it, I was just starting to get used to happy-Edward._

"You two can not be friends. It's impossible; you two are in love. Twenty years can't change that; hell, an eternity can't change that."

"I don't know." He was sulking. I needed to talk to Bella about this. I saw her pain in my vision, but I also saw the love. She loves him, I know it. A love like theirs doesn't change. It was nearly tangible to Jasper. If anything, her becoming a vampire should have solidified it from every changing or diminishing.

"What did you say to her? You told her you love her and that you made a mistake, right?"

He nodded.

"And you told her you lied that day?"

He nodded again.

"And you told her you came back and searched for her for fourteen years, right?"

He was perfectly still. _You told her that, right?_ He shook his head.

"Damn it, Edward! You need to tell her."

"I couldn't, she wouldn't let me."

"Oh shut up, she's Bella. Make her listen." I watched his face. _You know you need to talk; both of you have things to say._ He started the car and we began driving closer to home.

"Just promise me that you'll keep it to yourself till tomorrow, Alice. I'll talk to her soon, I promise, but tomorrow I want Renesmee to meet everyone. Tomorrow, it's about her."

_Fine._ I started disguising my thoughts from Edward so I could prepare for my own talk with Bella. _I wanna, I wanna, I wanna touch you. You wanna touch me too. Everyday, but all I have is time. Our love's the perfect crime. I wanna, I wanna, I wanna touch you. You wanna touch me too. Every way and when they set me free. Just put your hands on me.  
_

**BPOV**

I had had time to think about the day's events during the night while Renesmee slept. She started talking in her sleep at about 4am though. She was telling Edward about our beach trip in her dream. She was saying how pretty it was and how she wanted the three of us to go someday.

_Super. I practically had kicked him out and here she was thinking we're going to be a happy family. I suck._

I knew that Edward and I weren't going to work anything out soon; if ever. But we needed to be friends for her now. I needed to put in an effort to be friends, and I certainly didn't do that yesterday.

***

About eight thirty, Renesmee came out to the living room. I had been reading Romero and Juliet; feeling a little guilty still from the night before.

"Hey Mom, why didn't you wake me up?" She yawned and sank down into the couch next to me, putting her head on my shoulder.

I kissed the top of her head. "Sunny day." I didn't need to say anymore as she looked out the front window.

"Oh, got cha. So what are we doing today? Dad promised he would see me today, but since there's no school..." She looked to me and I saw the disappointment in her face.

"Your Dad has plans for you today. You need to be ready by ten; he's picking you up." Her face light up. "You're gonna meet your family today." She jumped off of the couch and ran to her room to start getting ready. All I heard as she left was; 'yes, finally.'

***

I walked into Renesmee's room to see her studying herself in the mirror. She held her hair up in a ponytail and smiled. Then she let it down and smiled. She repeated the sequence twice before I piped in.

"They'll love you no matter what, Renesmee."

"I know, but this is the first time they'll see me. What if they remember me in an ugly shirt or with bed hair?"

I laughed; she was such a 'mini-Alice.'

"Wear it down; that's more you anyway, and they will love you." I hugged her shoulders and then spread her hair out.

"Mom, aren't you going to get ready? It's 9:30." _Crap._

"No, this is about you, your Dad, and your family. I'll see them some other time." I couldn't wait to see them, especially Alice and Esme, but I wanted her to have their full undivided attention. She deserved it.

"Mom, please? I want you there. I need you there. What if I say the wrong thing or something?" She was beginning to get anxious and I heard her, already fast, heartbeat pick up.

"Honey, you couldn't say anything wrong to them. And your Dad will be there with you."

"Please, Momma. I need you there." She won then, and she knew it. Before I even thought of another excuse; an excuse that would fail to accomplish my argument anyway, she smiled.

"Fine. You win. I'll go get ready."

"Okay, I'll go pick you out something to wear. Go take a shower." _Ugh._

***

9:57am.

"Renesmee, I look fine. I'm not changing. I don't even like the silk top." I was losing my temper with her. Our fight over which top I was going to wear had been going on for the last seven minutes.

"But mommmmm."

"No." I put my foot down. She had convinced me to go with her. I let her pick out my jeans and shoes, but I was not budging on the top. I was wearing a simple green boat neck top. She had brought it for me, so I knew she approved. She just wanted me to dress up with the blue silk top she had snatched from her own closet.

"Fine!" She stormed out of my room.

I heard a car pulling into the driveway. Renesmee ran to her room and then met me at the foot of the stairs before she opened the door. Edward was already waiting.

"Hey Dad." She jumped up and hugged him.

"Hi Renemsee, honey." He was already acting like a dad. "Hi Bella." His smile shifted a bit but didn't disappear. Apparently I had made an effect last night because he could barely meet my eyes. _Yup, I suck._

"Hello Edward."

"Are you coming with us?" He looked hopefully between Renesmee and me.

"Yes, your daughter can be _quite_ persuasive." I looked at Renesmee and she simply beamed.

"I've noticed. Are you two ready?" He looked happy but I still knew I had hurt him yesterday.

"Yup, we're ready, Dad." Renesmee responded; she grabbed my wrist and pulled me through the doorway.

I closed and locked the door and then looked to the car he had driven over. "I thought you had a yellow car last night." I was positive it was yellow; it's not like I had trouble with my eyesight. And I was almost positive it was a Porsche, but I wasn't sure about that fact.

"That was Alice's car. She had mine; so I borrowed hers." Of course, it was a bit flashy for him. I walked around the back of the car.

_Volvo._

_Oh, you've got to be kidding me._ He had a new car, but it was still a shiny silver Volvo. I froze at the sight of the emblem.

"Mom, get in." I looked at Renesmee in the front seat. _Too much. _It was just… too much.

"Actually, I forgot to do something, how about you two go and I'll come by later?"

"Mom," Renesmee said as she got out of the car and walked over to me. She whispered slightly even though Edward would be able to hear us no matter what. "What's the matter?"

"I just forgot, I promised to call Renee this week; she thinks I'm heading towards Montreal this week on a job. I'll call her and then come over. Okay, honey?" It was complete bullshit and I saw Edward's face when I said my mother's name; he was suspicious, but I couldn't be sure if it was due to my lying abilities or me still being in contact with my mother.

"Mom, you have to come, please? I can't do this without you."

"I'll be there, I promise."

"Don't worry, I'll get her there." I looked up. _Oh my god!_ I ran to her at full speed, nearly knocking both of us to the ground.

**APOV**

I wanted to make sure Bella actually came to the house, but I also knew we needed to talk. Or at the very least; I had questions to ask and she probably needed to talk through some things for her own benefit.

As I walked up from the trees, I saw her telling Edward and Renesmee to go ahead without her. My poor niece looked so crushed that she wasn't going with them. In fact, she looked afraid that she wouldn't come at all. I felt so bad; I had to speak up.

"Don't worry, I'll get her there."

Bella's head turned and she flew to me. She hit me with more force than I expected and we almost fell to the ground.

"You have _no idea_ how much I missed you." Bella whispered as she held a vice-like grip on me, somewhat resembling a hug.

"I think I have a fairly good idea. I missed you, too."

"Thank you." I knew she was talking about the letter and all of the trunk's contents. It made so much more sense now. She needed to take care of my niece with all of those things. They were important for their survival. I understood the money, documents, and even the clothes, but I was still guessing about the rest of the contents I had included.

"I know." I didn't need to say anything more. We were sisters after all; we didn't need to say everything we felt. _Get out of my head, Edward. _I thought it calmly but I saw his head snap. _I'll bring her soon, but I need to talk to her first._

I released Bella but still hung onto her hand. "So, do I get to meet my niece?" I smiled at Bella and she smiled back brightly.

"Of course! Renesmee." She called her over and I could tell she was excited. She was wearing an exaggerated smile and was slightly bobbing up and down with excitement. "Alice, this is your niece. Renesmee, _this_ is your Aunt Alice."

Renesmee squealed and jumped at me. I was more prepared for her than Bella and was easily able to keep us more stable."I hear she calls you a 'mini-me.'" I pulled back to smile at her. "I believe I owe you a shopping trip."

"I can't wait, Aunt Alice. I'm so excited; I can't put it into words." She jumped up in the air a few times and then stood next to Bella. _Oh, Jasper is going to love her emotional personality!_ Edward nodded his head smiling.

"I'm so glad to _finally_ meet you." I looked at Bella and she frowned slightly. "But you need to go and meet everyone else with Edward. They'll all making Jasper very anxious." Edward nodded. Renesmee looked at Bella. "Don't worry, I'll bring her soon. I just want to talk to her first. She can call Renee first if she wants to." I looked at Edward. _I'm not going to think about what I want to talk about till you leave; stay out of my head._

Edward looked at me quickly before speaking. "Yeah, let's go Renesmee; Alice won't be long, she can't stand to miss the fun." I smiled at Edward while locking my arms with Bella.

"Okay." Renesmee walked to the car and got in. Both Bella and I smiled and waved as they pulled away.

While we watched them pull out onto the main street, I asked, "So, do you want the hard questions or the easy questions first?" Bella looked down and pulled me into the house. "Don't get me wrong, I'm thrilled to see you and I'm not mad at all, but I'm more than a little curious."

It was an understatement. I wanted to know everything. I had more questions than I could comprehend. _Where has she been? How is she a vampire? How do I have a niece? How did she manage alone? How is she so controlled? How long has she been so controlled? How did my gifts play into her survival? What is my niece like?_

But those questions were ones that everyone would want to know the answers too. I had just two questions that I needed to decipher before we went to meet the rest of the family. But if she wants the easy questions, I don't mind humoring her for a bit.

"Go for the tough questions, Alice. I need to be able to answer them anyways." She smiled at me, but I could tell she was insanely nervous._ Thank God!_

"Why didn't you use my damn credit card?" I smiled so she knew I wasn't mad and she let out a breath.

"I came so close to using it; on more than one occasion. But… I just never could." I nodded for her to continue. "At first, I wanted to use it when I figured out I was pregnant, but I was afraid of everyone's reactions. I knew you'd all try to help me, but I was more afraid that you couldn't. I mean what if you all came back just to watch me and her die? I couldn't do it."

"I get that, but you're wrong as hell you know. We wouldn't have let you two die." She nodded.

"The next time was after Renesmee asked me about Edward for the first time. I wasn't ready to see him, but I thought that if she meant you then she'd be okay for a while till I was stronger. But I just didn't know how long it would take me to get 'stronger' and I didn't want to break up your family just so I could keep her a secret from him." She looked down; she was ashamed.

"I understand Bella, but you know I would do anything for you. I told you that. And after spending no more than five minutes with my _niece_, I know I would do anything for her, too. And besides, _you are family._ No matter what happens, you're my sister." She smiled and nodded her head again. "Anyways, are you 'stronger' now?" She shook her head. "See, timing wouldn't have mattered much."

She continued on. "Most of the time it was like that; she would ask about Edward or some other member of the family and I would consider contacting you and then I'd back out because I was scared, or selfish, or stupid… or whatever."

"Bella, you get the right to be all of those things, especially selfish. You earned that and I'm not mad at you in the slightest. But… you're my sister. I missed you and I wanted you to contact me. I just wish you had."

"I'm so sorry, Alice." Her eyes were crying unshed tears and I knew she was seeing the same emotion in me.

"Okay, now the really tough question." She took a deep breath and nodded her head for me to continue. "Do you still love Edward?"

Bella stood up then. She started pacing around her living room at vampire speed. It was surreal to see. I always knew she'd end up this way, even when we left, but I never thought I'd see her use the abilities so absentmindedly.

She finally stopped and looked back to me. "He lied, he left, and he just ended up finding me yesterday. It's not like he was actively looking for me because he realized he made a mistake. He just got lucky and found us, and then decided he wanted me back."

_Oh, you have no idea, Bella. _I knew Edward needed to tell her this. He needed to be the one to tell her that he waited six months and completely feel apart. He needed to tell her that he searched for fourteen years for her; that he went to every family member she had, some of which she had never met, just hoping she would end up there one day. He searched every state in America and then went to Canada and Mexico hoping that she would go there. He may not have been searching recently, but I knew it was only a matter of time before he started his search all over again. It wouldn't matter if he found her 80 years old and senile; he still would have loved her.

"Oh Bella, you need to talk to Edward. I thought I could get into this, but I don't think I can." I took an exasperated breath and looked at her.

"Why? I said something; there's something I don't know, isn't there?" She glared at me for clarification and I quickly nodded.

"I can't Bella; he needs to be the one to tell you."

"You _see_ that he will; that he _has_ to be the one?" _No, I can't see a damn thing! Your beautiful daughter is interfering with my sight for some unknown reason._ I looked at her for several minutes before answering.

"Bella, it's not my place to say. We need to talk about this, but you have to know that piece of information before then, and he has to tell you." She looked frustrated; I could tell she didn't like that I was keeping secrets from her. "Come on; let's not leave your daughter alone with my crazy family for too long. Emmett will probably squeeze her too tight and damage her beautiful clothes."

Bella glared for another moment and then nodded.

**A/N: Okay, hopefully a long chapter will make everyone happy since I waited so long to update. I'm sorry; I started writing this chapter and absolutely hated what I wrote. But I'm pretty happy with what I got now.**

**I'm up to over 500 reviews, which totally amazes me. I got so many reviews this time and was surprised by the reactions. You all feel so strongly about the story and I'm a little nervous about writing it now. I feel like I really owe you all something special. **

**Most people are happy with Bella's actions, but many aren't. But all I can say is that I have a plan; that there's a happy ending although it will take time. Please keep in mind; Bella always was stubborn and that being a vampire gave her a temper. I hope you all continue to read and review :)**

**As always, Read, Review, and Ask! I love your comments, keep them coming!**

**~kmwhyte**

**_A/N 9/19: I fixed as much of the grammar mistakes as I could find :)_**


	18. How Did We Get Here?

**Disclaimer: I own nothing when it comes to Twilight or the songs I make reference to. I know… I'm sad too!**

**EPOV**

It only took about ten minutes for me to get to my house from Bella's. I drove slower than normal; although it was still well above the speed limit.

As we pulled into the driveway, I began hearing my family's thoughts. They had no idea why I wanted them all here waiting for me; and some of them were very curious, while others were just a bit irritated that I was keeping secrets.

I heard Rosalie the most clearly; she must have been at a window. "_Finally. Who's that with him?"_

I shut out her thoughts quickly. I was eager for them to meet Renesmee, but I was also somewhat anxious for their reaction. I had no doubt that they would love her, but I wasn't so sure how they'd act towards me.

I shut off the car and flew to Renesmee's door. When I opened it, she was just sitting there staring out the windshield. She hadn't said much in the car and anytime I heard her thinking she was worrying about whether Bella was okay or not.

"Renesmee, we're here." I held out my hand to help her out of the car and to give her a little emotional support.

"I'm scared, Dad." She didn't look at me or say anything more, but her thoughts were many. _"What if they don't like me? What if they don't want to know me? I wish Mom was here…"_

I bent down so our eyes were on the same level, now that she was looking at me. "Renesmee, they _will_ love you. Trust me. They're curious and anxious, but only because I haven't told them anything. So I'll need to explain and they'll be shocked, but once that wears off… they probably won't let you leave for days. Trust me, honey, they'll love you." I said it as fiercely as I could. I was certain of the truth in my words.

"You still didn't tell them anything, but Aunt Alice…" She took my hand and I helped her out of the car.

"Alice kind of got it out of me last night, but no one else knows. I thought it would be easier to believe if they saw you. You're not exactly a common occurrence, Renesmee."

I shut her door and held my arm over her shoulders as she nodded. We walked up the front steps and stopped in front of the door. "You ready? They are all in the living room. Rosalie told them I was back."

She took a deep breath. "_I'm ready, Dad. Just don't let go."_ She took my hand in hers and I opened the door.

Carlisle and Esme were sitting on the sofa while Jasper was in one of the armchairs farthest from the door. Rosalie and Emmett were standing near the staircase. All their thoughts hit me at once.

Emmett. _"What the hell? He brought a human; oh crap, Rose is gonna freak."_

Rosalie. _"A human! What is he thinking? I'm gonna kill him."_ Rose took a step forward but Emmett held her back by her shoulders.

Carlisle. _"Oh Edward… What did you do?"_

Esme. _"She's lovely but… She's looks so much like…"_ Esme forced a smile, but I could see her looking to Carlisle for his leadership.

Jasper. _"That's not Bella, although she looks similar. Alice said it was Bella. Oh, Rose is pissed." _Jasper looked at Rose then, as did everyone.

Renesmee tightened her grip on my hand. She was stronger than a human, but it couldn't hurt me. I squeezed her hand back and then stepped forward into the living room.

When we were about five feet from the sofa, I looked at Renesmee and then back to my family.

"I'm not sure how to correctly introduce this information so I'm just going to say this. Please," I looked to Rosalie. "Stay calm. This is Renesmee. She is my daughter."

It was silent for nearly five minutes; and there were nearly no thoughts to be heard for nearly two. Slowly, the thoughts became known; some with a vengeance.

Emmett. _"Holy shit, Edward! You've got to be kidding me? When the hell did you lose your 'virtue?'"_ Leave it Emmett to get under my skin with this kind of news.

Rosalie. "_Daughter? Edward has a child… I'll kill him!"_ Rosalie's mind was so irate, I couldn't pinpoint the exact reason for her anger, but I had a feeling it had to do with the fact that I had the one thing that she had always wanted.

Carlisle. _"…daughter? She looks about seventeen… this is impossible. I need more information, Edward."_ He was calm, but still completely shell-shocked.

Esme. "_Oh my. I don't know how this is possible. I don't understand. How does he have a daughter? How is that possible? Who is the mother?"_ Esme's mind was going a million miles a minute trying to grasp the situation, yet she seemed to believe the declaration the most.

Jasper. _"Wow. I think I understand, but this still doesn't make any sense. Please explain, Edward; their confusion is deafening."_

I nodded at Jasper and walked closer. I led Renesmee to the second sofa that sat across from Esme and Carlisle. She sat, but still refused to let go of my hand so I decided to sit as well.

"I know this is a lot. There's a lot to explain and a lot of questions being asked, but I don't know how to answer them all in some speech or monolouge. This isn't something I expected because I had no idea she existed until yesterday." I looked at Renesmee again and she seemed to relax.

"_I'd feel better if one of them would talk; are they okay?" _Renesmee asked silently and I nodded to her.

"Edward." I looked to Carlisle as he spoke. "I think I speak for everyone when I say we are simply… shocked. I don't believe there is a better word to fit this situation. But, I'm sure I'm not the only wondering; how?" Everyone else seemed to nod, although Rosalie glared at the same time.

"I don't know all the details of how it's possible. But I do know how it happened. Bella and I were intimate before her birthday and … we conceived Renesmee." I didn't want to have this conversation with my entire family. I had no problem telling Carlisle, or even Esme, but I certainly didn't want Emmett to make any comments about it. Unfortunately, I wasn't lucky in that area.

"So Bella, huh? Wow, always knew she could take on a monster." He laughed, but quickly silenced himself when Esme shot him a glare.

Esme asked the next question, which was already being thought by everyone, except Jasper. "Where is Bella?" She looked hopeful, but her thoughts were scared.

"Mom's okay. She's with Aunt Alice at home. She said she'd be here soon." Renesmee responded before I could. Everyone was shocked that she spoke, but instantly felt relieved to know that Bella was well.

Everyone continued to stare at Renesmee. _"Dad, did I do something wrong?"_ I heard her thoughts followed by Jasper acknowledging that she was getting anxious and scared.

I squeezed her hand. "No, they're happy that your mom is fine and they're just a little shocked that you're here. It's fine." She nodded, but still was frightened that she made a bad impression.

Esme stood up then. "Renesmee, right?" Renesmee nodded. "I'm sorry we're talking like you're not here. Like Edward said, we are shocked. But… I am _so_ glad to meet you." Esme walked closer when Renesmee smiled at her.

"_Edward, is it okay if I go closer? I don't want to frighten her, but I want to hug her."_ I nodded to Esme,but decided it best to give Renesmee some warning as well.

"Renesmee, Esme really wants to hug you." She laughed, but then got up to meet Esme halfway.

"You are so beautiful dear. I'm so glad you're here." Esme cooed to her while she hugged her lightly.

"Me too. I've wanted to meet you for a while, Grandma." Esme gasped, which caused Renesmee to lean back. "Is that okay? I can call you Esme if you want. That's just what I always called you when Mom and I talked about you."

Esme caressed Renesmee's cheek. "I would love for you to call me Grandma, Renesmee." They took each other's hands and Renesmee led her back to the sofa where I was sitting. She smiled as she sat between her grandmother and me.

"Well, it seems that we have a lot of questions to cover and a lot of time to make up for. But maybe we should save the big questions until your mother comes." Carlisle suggested and I agreed. I didn't want to overwhelm her.

"That sounds good. I probably don't know everything." Renesmee replied, but mentally she was fearful that she might say something that Bella didn't want to share.

"Okay, that's settled. Can I assume though that you are not a vampire?"

"Not fully. I'm a half-breed; a hybrid. I have a heartbeat and can eat food to live, but I also drink blood. And I'm immortal." Renesmee laughed at her classification.

"You're immortal?" Emmett said while ushering Rosalie to the sofa. He wanted to get closer, as did she.

"Yeah, I've been this age for about twelve years. It's weird." Renesmee looked down, but Esme lifted her chin up and kissed her cheek.

"You have looked like a high school student since you were… eight?" Rosalie was finding the knowledge baffling, but was at least losing some of her rage towards me.

"Yeah, I grew really fast and then I just stopped." Renesmee looked to me and I nodded. "I can show you, but I need to touch your face. And I can only show one or two of you at a time."

"Two?" I questioned.

"Yeah, two hands." She held up her hands and smiled.

"Well, I want to see." Renesmee turned and held a hand to Esme's cheek.

She began to show her memories of herself looking in a mirror. "Here's me after I was born, with Mom." Bella was holding her, smiling, in front of a glass window. _The Forks house…_ "Here's me when I was about three." She showed Esme a vision of her trying on a shirt of Bella's, I assumed. She nearly fit. "Here's me when I was six." She looked about fifteen. "And here's me when I was ten." She was fully grown and looked nearly identical to what she looks like now ,except for her hair being slightly longer; maybe two inches.

"Amazing." Esme was completely fascinated.

Renesmee looked over to Carlisle. "Yes, please Renesmee. I would love to see." She smiled and walked over to the other sofa. She held a hand out to Carlisle.

"Me too, little girl!" Emmett laughed as Renesmee blushed. "Oh man, I hope your mom still does that."

Renesmee proceeded to show both Carlisle and Emmett the same memories that she showed Esme.

"Incredible, that is a remarkable gift; simply amazing." Carlisle smiled during the entire event and was astounded with what he saw. I could hear the questions crossing his mind, only to be followed by more. He was in doctor mode with his curiosity, but was also so enthralled with Renesmee that he was hoping she would call him 'grandpa.'

"That is crazy. You turned into a knockout in eight years." Always the respectful gentlemen; Emmett. I glared, but Renesmee simply giggled at the comment.

"Do you want to see Aunt Rosalie?" Renesmee was slightly worried since she hadn't said much. She was afraid that she didn't like her because of the fierce looks she had been shooting my way.

"Of course, Renesmee. I absolutely want to see." Rosalie smiled at her and I could hear the fear in her own thoughts. She was fearful that Renesmee wouldn't want to show her. She was afraid that Bella had said awful things about her and that Renesmee would hate her. But she didn't have to worry; I knew Bella would never talk badly about the family. She hadn't even told Renesmee the horrible things that I had done to her.

"Uncle Jasper?" Jasper looked to me. His thoughts clear.

"_I won't hurt her. Even if she smelled like a human, I would never hurt my niece. I promise, Edward."_ I nodded as he stood to move to the arm of the sofa next to Rosalie.

Renesmee played the memories for a third time.

"That was… I don't think there are words for that.,." Jasper looked to me. _"She's… unbelievable, Edward._

"You were a beautiful little girl, Renesmee. You still are." Rosalie stood up and made a move to hug Renesmee, but stopped short; afraid that Renesmee would not welcome the gesture. But Renesmee just nodded her head and moved her arms around Rosalie herself.

"Thanks. You're more beautiful than the pictures. Mom was right." Renesmee whispered, but we all heard.

Rosalie pulled back, but kept her hands on Renesmee's shoulders. "About what?" She was happy that Renesmee had taken to her, but was still scared that Bella may have held a grudge.

"That you're pretty; just like your name." Renesmee laughed and then showed her the memory of Bella explaining who Rosalie was. I could only assume that she was describing everyone, but she only showed the part about Rosalie.

Rosalie smiled and relaxed back down into Emmett's waiting arms.

Renesmee walked back to the sofa and sat in between Esme and me, again. But she jumped up only a second later when Alice and Bella opened the door.

"Bella!" A chorus from the family greeted her as she walked in. I'm sure that if she could have, she would have blushed.

Emmett. _"Damn, no more blushes. At least Renesmee will fill that void." _He laughed at his own thoughts.

Esme walked over to Bella and Alice let go of her hand to go sit on Jasper's lap after she kissed Renesmee's cheek on her way.

"Bella, it is so good to see you, although I wish we could have been together all this time. You look lovely. And your daughter is precious." Esme hugged Bella tightly.

"Thank you, Esme. You know, I named her after you and my mom?" Bella pulled back to look into her eyes.

"Thank you." Esme couldn't say anything else at the sentiment; she was simply overcome, and so she settled for another fierce hug.

Carlisle walked over to them and Renesmee sat on the arm of the sofa next to me. "Bella."

Bella approached Carlisle and then flew into his waiting arms. _She didn't have that reaction to me…_ "Hi Carlisle, I've missed you."

"We've missed you and apparently, we've missed a great deal of events as well." He looked to Renesmee and smiled.

"I know, I can explain-"

Carlisle cut her off. "It's fine. We have questions, of course, but right now we just want to welcome you back."

"Thank you."

"_She's perfectly at ease now. She was so anxious before, I thought she might bolt." _Jasper commented mentally.

"Hey little sis, when'd you stop breathing?" Emmett stood up and picked Bella up off the floor in a hug. "Now I can squeeze all I want and you won't break." They both laughed. Bella squeezed him as well and giggled when he gasped at her strength. "Damn, you're stronger than I thought." She wasn't a match for him though.

"Hi Jasper, Rosalie." Jasper waved at Bella and said hello. He was nervous of her response to him if he should approach. Rosalie smiled and considered approaching her but decided she would save the conversation she wanted to have with her till she didn't have an audience.

"Sit, please Bella." Carlisle held a hand out, leading her to the sofa where Renesmee and I sat. Esme followed Carlisle back to the sofa, taking his seat while he leaned behind her.

I moved to the other end and Renesmee sat next to me to make room for Bella.

I could hear Esme's mind working. _"A family… who would have guessed? I'm so happy for both of them."_ She hadn't realized that it wasn't what she thought.

We were quiet for several minutes before I heard Renesmee's thoughts. _"Dad, say something. I'm freaking out here."_ I placed my hand over Renesmee's and nodded to Carlisle to begin. He had been thinking of questions but was unsure if the time was right.

"Bella, we're so curious to how Renesmee and you are here." Bella nodded. "When did you find out you were pregnant?" Bella let out a breath; probably relieved that he didn't ask how she was conceived. Thankfully, I had seemed to taken that bullet for her; with less of a conversation than I had expected.

"I figured it out almost a week after you all left. I was really sick, but I didn't put it together at first. After I figured it out, it was kind of obvious. I already had a baby bump and everything."

"So soon?" Carlisle wasn't surprised, especially after seeing Renesmee's growth.

"Yeah, I was only pregnant for about a month."

"How'd you survive?" Esme asked.

"I had help." Bella paused and looked to Renesmee, who took her hand and squeezed. "I left Charlie's house and ended up staying at yours. After a few weeks, I knew I wasn't going to be able to take care of Renesmee afterwards right away so I called Angela."

_What? She called Angela?_ The whole family was shocked and worried that something happened to a human because of us; because of me. Alice was the one who spoke though. "You called Angela, but you didn't call me?" Alice looked hurt and I knew I had missed something.

"I'm sorry, Alice. I didn't know what to do. I just knew I needed someone to stay with her while I was transforming." Bella was pleading for Alice to understand. Alice nodded, but I heard her decide to talk to her later about it.

"You transformed during birth?" Everyone was shocked that Rosalie had asked, but relieved that the question was out there.

"Alice left me a key to a filing cabinet." Carlisle gasped and I instantly knew what she found when she opened it. Venom. "There was venom in metal syringes. All of yours. I knew I wouldn't survive giving birth. My girl here has some sharp teeth." Bella combed her fingers through Renesmee's hair lovingly. "So I decided to use the venom after she was born. I wasn't sure if it was going to work, but it was the only idea I had."

I looked to Carlisle. I was angry because he knew he left them there, but also completely thankful that he had saved her indirectly. "I had taken everyone's venom because I wanted to be prepared. I knew Edward didn't want to change you, but I also knew how strongly you felt about it, Bella. I figured that we could use a shot and pain medication if we ever needed to change you. I had everyone's in case one wasn't powerful enough. When we left, I didn't think I'd need them. I'm glad I did." Esme turned and ran her hand over his arm.

"I'm glad too, Carlisle. I wouldn't have survived without it. Angela wasn't with me twenty minutes and I went into labor. I passed out, but woke up after Renesmee bit her way through my stomach." Renesmee frowned and I heard her hoping that the family wouldn't rescind their feelings for her. "I had just enough time to inject it."

"Whose did you use?" Emmett asked and everyone eyed him. They all assumed she used my venom, but Emmett wanted to ask anyways. I, on the other hand, wasn't so sure.

Bella paused and then looked to Alice. "I used Alice's."

I looked to the floor hearing everyone's thoughts.

Alice. _"Oh my god."_

Rosalie. _"Not Edward's? Wow."_

Carlisle. _"Interesting, I wouldn't have guessed that."_

Esme. _"Uh oh."_

Jasper. _"She's feeling remorse. I would have bet anything that she used Edward's."_

Emmett._ "Wow, _so_ did not see that backfiring."_

Everyone mentally agreed to let that little fact drop upon seeing my reaction, while Bella shifted in her seat. Renesmee was the only one that seemed at ease. _"What's the big deal?"_

"How was your transformation, Bella? I'm sure it was painful, but did it last long?" Carlisle asked to avoid the topic of venom.

"It hurt like hell, but a thousand times worse. But it didn't take too long. Three days, give or take a few hours. I thought it would take longer with all of the damage." Bella relaxed during her response and leaned back into the sofa.

"And you said that she bit her way out of you to be born?" Carlisle was curious beyond all measure. He didn't see Renesmee look back to the floor as the comments about her hurting Bella came to the forefront again.

"_I never wanted to hurt Mom. I didn't know what else to do. It was dark and it hurt. I was so scared when I saw her like that…"_ I saw the memory of when Renesmee saw Bella for the first time. She looked up from the open stomach she was sitting in to see Bella whispering comforting words. But it was obvious that Bella was dying and was in a world of pain. I hugged Renesmee to me with one arm.

"It's okay, you're both fine. It's okay, I know you would never hurt her. Everyone knows that." I whispered in her ear, but I was fully aware that everyone heard the exchange.

Bella leaned over to Renesmee's ear that was now next to my cheek since she had buried her face into my neck. "Baby, it was the only way. You did what you knew to. You couldn't have helped it. I'm fine and so are you. I would do it all over again, even if I didn't survive. Don't upset yourself, Renesmee." She rubbed her back.

"Oh Renesmee, I'm so sorry. I never intended to assert that you meant your mother harm. Of course you didn't, we all know that." Carlisle was frantic to apologize. Renesmee lifted her head slightly to look at me.

"_Dad, I'm sorry I got upset. I think I'm gonna go outside. I'll be around, but I don't want to listen to this, if that's okay."_

"Of course, you can go outside. There are some benches out in the backyard." I didn't want her to be by herself, but she was truly upset and I needed to hear what Bella went through as well.

"Do you want me to come, sweetheart?" Bella looked like she wanted to flee as well.

"No, I just don't want to hear about it. I know what I need to know. I'll come back in a bit." Renesmee leaned down to kiss Bella's cheek and Bella nodded, somewhat defeated.

"May I join you Renesmee?" Rosalie stood up and looked directly at her. "I can hear the story from Emmett anytime. I'd rather make sure you're okay." Rosalie then looked to Bella. Bella nodded in silent approval but Renesmee didn't see.

"Yeah, I'd like that." Renesmee smiled and they walked out the back sliding glass doors.

**A/N: I know you all are probably sad I stopped there, but it was just going on too long. And it was also very hard with so many characters interacting. I have tons of respect for Stephanie Meyer, because those were always my favorite moments in the books.**

**This will continue on to the next chapter and possibly another chapter after that. I want to break it up into smaller groups as the questions become more personal. I am definitely planning for an Alice/Bella conversation and a Bella/Edward conversation within the next two chapters depending on how the length goes.**

**Thank you to all of you who have reviewed. I'm nearly at 600 reviews and I'm simply ecstatic. I'm planning to write the next chapter very soon, but it will be a few days because I just got a job :) Good for me, not so much for the readers, sorry. I also want to thank Emerald Star73 for fixing so many of my mistakes. She totally rocks and everyone should read her story! THANKS!!**

**As always, Read, Review, and Ask! I love your comments, keep them coming!**

**~kmwhyte**


	19. Caught in the Middle of Crossfire

**Disclaimer: I own nothing when it comes to Twilight or the songs I make reference to. I know… I'm sad too!**

**A/N: FYI; this chapter changes POV a few times, but it picks up right where it left off so it shouldn't be too confusing. Enjoy!**

**CPOV (Carlisle)**

We all watched as Renesmee and Rosalie left to go outside. I had not intended on making it sound like Renesmee had deliberately hurt Bella. She was the purest person I had meant since Bella herself. _I made my granddaughter feel guilty. I made her think that we all thought she had hurt her mother on purpose._

"Bella, I am so sorry. I never meant to hurt either of you. I didn't think of the emotional reaction that she would have; I was merely curious from a medical standpoint. This is something I have no knowledge of. I am fairly certain that there is no one in the world like her, and the fact that you both are here today… it's just incredibly interesting to me. I'm sorry, Bella."

Bella held up her hand. "Its fine, Carlisle. I understand. And she does too, she just… she hates to think about it. We don't talk about it much. She doesn't like to think that I came so close to dying. She thinks it's her fault, but it's not."

"Of course not, it's nobody's fault." Esme smiled at Bella in reassurance.

"Still, Bella, I am sorry. It's just I have so many questions. You know my fascination; but still, I should have thought about the emotional ramifications versus my own interest."

"Honestly Carlisle, it's fine." Bella was hesitant, but continued. "I know you all have questions. I knew that I would have to answer them. So… go ahead. Shoot."

Everyone looked around the room; waiting for anyone to start off the inquisition. After several seconds, everyone's eyes, including Bella's, landed on myself.

"I guess we should start at the beginning. Bella, what happened after we left?" I looked to Edward.

_I'm sorry, but that's where it all started for her, Edward._ He nodded slightly and looked to Bella.

Bella looked down at her lap and fidgeted with her hands; she almost seemed human again with the mannerism. "I was sick, and after a few days I went back to school. I ended up getting really sick there. That's when it clicked. I knew I was only feeling the symptoms so soon because of the supernatural stuff, but it made sense; at least… as much as it could." She laughed without humor and continued. "I, uh, went and got a pregnancy test, not really expecting for it to tell me anything, but it was positive. I already had a bump in my belly and I knew I needed to leave. I couldn't deal with it with Charlie there, so I lied and told him I was going to Renee's and I ended up at your house."

I was speechless. Within a week of conception, she was physically sick and had a distended stomach from the fetus. From her description, she was exhibiting signs of being three months pregnant; give or take.

"Charlie let you leave?" Esme pulled me out of my reverie. I was so concerned with the science; I was forgetting the emotional consequences again.

"He put up a little bit of a fight, but he was just hoping that I'd be happier there." Everyone nodded. We were all fully aware that she was miserable when we all left. Alice had described her state to us many times; trying to convince us to return. I was sure that Charlie was just hoping that Renee would be able to help Bella when he couldn't.

"Why'd you go to our house, Bella?" Emmett asked. It was an obvious enough question; I'm surprised no had beaten him to the punch.

"I didn't really intend to go there. I was just trying to drive away from Forks. I guess I was kinda lost in my own thoughts, but when I realized where I was… I don't know, I figured it was a place to stay for the day at least. But, I ended up finding Alice's note and all the stuff she left, so I stayed." Everyone's heads whipped around to stare at Alice. Even Jasper was stunned. Although, Edward looked extremely upset at the revelation.

**APOV (Alice)**

Sweet, she blew the secret!

Not that it really mattered anymore. They can't fault me for helping my sister and niece survive while my brother was behaving like a dumbass, but I was really hoping we could just bypass that set of details.

Edward glared in my direction and I meant his eyes. "You what?"

"Okay, everybody calm down." I held up my hands in surrender; I knew an explanation was in order, but still. "I was having a lot of visions when Edward decided we needed to leave for Bella's own good." Bella looked down; as did Edward. Neither of them seemed to like those points being brought up into the family discussion. _Oh well._ "None of which was very clear. I had seen several times that she would end up at our house and I had seen things that I was apparently leaving her, but I had no idea why. I decided it was best to just chance it and leave the stuff I saw she needed. I wrote her a note explaining all of this."

"Yeah, you said in the note that you weren't sure if I would even find it." She nodded as she spoke.

"What did you leave her, Alice?" I turned to face Jasper.

"I left her the key to Carlisle's filing cabinet, the key to Esme's BMW we left behind, some blank documents, a few things she had left around the house, clothes, and some cash. And some blood. I still don't know what you needed that for." I looked to Bella. I had a theory, now that I had seen Renesmee, but I wanted it to be confirmed without me voicing my guess.

"Oh, I, uh, that was the only thing I could really keep down through the pregnancy and the only thing Renesmee would eat." Bella looked down, embarrassed, and I knew we all were missing her blush at that moment.

"So, you drank blood as a human? Dude, I told you she was meant to be a vampire!" Emmett pointed at Edward while he laughed. Esme slapped his arm down before Bella looked up from her lap.

"Bella, how did you know what to do? Did the blood… call to you?" Carlisle was clearly curious. He was sitting on the edge of the couch trying to formulate the questions into coherent sentences.

Bella looked up. "Kinda. I was eating regular food, but I couldn't keep anything down. I had opened the fridge and saw the obscene amount of blood Alice left. I couldn't think of any reason why I would need that much." _Neither could I, at the time._ Edward looked at me, clearly questioning whether I actually knew or not."I pulled one of the bags out and … I don't know… it smelled good. Like food. Once I started drinking it; it wasn't a big deal. I knew it was the baby, but it didn't bother me either. The smell was different some how."

"Amazing." Carlisle continued to stare at Bella while she shifted in her seat. She still wasn't comfortable with the focus being solely on her.

"What about Angela? How did she come into this? Is she okay?" Esme was hesitant in asking, clearly fearing what we all feared; that Angela had become a meal, or at least been harmed, or maybe scared to death by what she saw.

Bella crossed her legs, seeming to get more comfortable. I saw Edward lift his arm to drape it over her shoulders, but he stopped before she noticed and dropped it back into his lap. _Give her time, Edward._

"I knew I wasn't going to survive without changing into a vampire and I knew I needed someone to take care of her till I could." Bella looked out the back sliding glass doors to Renesmee and Rosalie. "I didn't know who to call. I'm sorry didn't contact you, Alice. I just didn't want you to come back that way… please understand." I nodded, although there was still a conversation to be had over the topic. I still wasn't happy over her choice, but I didn't want her to defend her actions to the entire family; and none of them knew how easy it would have been for her to contact me with the credit card. Edward's head popped up. _Don't start… later. _"I knew Angela was my only hope. I called her and asked her to come over. She freaked out a bit, but still decided to help me."

Jasper shifted next to me. "What did you tell her?"

"Not much. She knew it was supernatural and she knew Edward was the father, but she never asked for details and I just told her it was better if she didn't know what was going on."

"She just agreed to help you?" Jasper was clearly confused. As a rule, humans ask questions and get scared. But Bella was describing Angela as if she hadn't been frightened at all. As if she had acted like Bella herself.

"I asked her if she could take care of the baby and she agreed, but before I even got any further into our conversation… I was in pain… I was in labor. Angela helped me upstairs and once Renesmee was out, she took her. I told her about the blood, although I didn't call it blood, in the fridge. I had put it in a pitcher and told her it was for Renesmee. Once she left, I injected the venom into my heart and I started to change."

"Your heart? That's… that would definitely speed up the process." Carlisle was reverting into the doctor mode yet again. "You said it took three days; how did Angela care for Renesmee for that time?"

"Um, she fed her blood. She figured out what it was, but she didn't deviate from it. Renesmee has showed me all of the memories she has with Angela. She loved Angela; she misses her sometimes, still."

"She never bit her?" Esme asked.

"No. She acknowledged that she smelled good, but she's always been incredibly bright. Astoundingly so! She knew Angela was there to take care of her and that she shouldn't hurt her. She's never bitten anyone; even me."

"What about you, Bella? You seem so… controlled?" Carlisle inquired, rather hesitantly.

"Angela was hard to resist. I ended up jumping out of your window to go hunt for the first time. Animals. You actually helped me a lot, Emmett." She smiled at him.

"Me? How?"

"You told me what it was like to hunt once. That your senses take over. That it isn't even really you; it's the animalistic side. I was terrified up until I remembered what you said." Emmett and Bella both smiled at each other. "After I drained quite a few deer; I came back, but I still didn't trust myself so I spoke to Angela threw the glass window. She didn't ask any questions, but they were all written on her face. She left and that night, Renesmee and I left Forks for good."

Jasper was astonished by her control. "You weren't tempted by Renesmee?"

"No. She smelled great, but not in a food way."

Jasper nodded.

"Do you have a gift? Or is Renesmee the only special one?" Emmett laughed.

"No, I don't think so. Twenty years hasn't exactly shown any clues."

"Maybe you're power isn't superficial, maybe it's something else." Carlisle theorized and then looked to Edward, asking a silent question.

Edward answered. "No, I still don't know what she's thinking."

"Well then, maybe…" Everyone looked to Carlisle. A chorus of 'what' sounded before he continued. "I've had twenty years to contemplate it and I think you might be some sort of shield, Bella; maybe a mental one."

Emmett laughed. "She's mental, well if the doctor says it…"

Edward spoke, completely ignoring Emmett. "That makes sense. It would explain everything."

Bella looked between both Carlisle and Edward silently begging for an explanation; much like the rest of us.

"I'm sorry; let me explain. Shielding, as a power, deflects attacks on one's self. Most shields are physical; they create barriers around themselves to which no one gets close enough to harm them. But you, I believe, are a mental shield. Your power protects your mind, to the point where no one can harm you that way."

"But then why can Alice see me? And Jasper can sense my emotions, right?" It was true, but even I knew why that didn't matter if she was truly a mental shield.

"Bella, I can see outcomes of the future. They're based on your decisions, but I don't actually see the decisions. Your brain plays no part in my power, so the shield doesn't ward me off."

Jasper chimed in. "And I can sense and manipulate your emotions, but I have no clue to why you feel them. If you feel remorse, I could only guess to why." Bella nodded.

"That makes sense… I just… I didn't know I had a power."

"It's quite an unusual and strong gift, Bella. I've never met a mental shield; in fact, I've only heard of a few. It's quite rare for anyone to have that power. And now that you know, you may be able to alter it."

"How?"

"Maybe project it over others. Or maybe even relinquish it so that it doesn't protect you all the time. It would take time and an awful lot of effort." Bella nodded again.

**EPOV (Edward)**

If she could relinquish it, then I could hear her thoughts. _Oh, what I couldn't give for that._

But she would never do that with me present. She always loved the fact that I couldn't hear her thoughts and she had more reason to feel that way now.

"So why didn't we see you yesterday at school?" Emmett asked the question, but as soon as he did, everyone nodded. I was quite curious why we hadn't seen her, or Renesmee, prior to me meeting them, as well.

"I don't know. I never knew you were there, until Edward walked into my Biology class."

"_Biology, how fitting."_ Alice smirked to herself over the thought.

Emmett continued to wonder. "Still, we should have seen you at lunch, even if none of us eat."

"We skipped lunch. We normally do since neither of us like to eat. We were in the car." Bella just shook her head dismissively.

"Well, that explains that, but I have a more pressing question." Alice looked from Bella and me to Carlisle. "I can't see a damn thing anymore and I think it has to do with my beautiful niece."

"What do you mean, Alice?" Esme's face lined with worry.

"I mean I had no idea she existed and I still have not received one vision containing her. Plus, I can't see anyone when they're with her. Right now, I can barely see five seconds into the future since she's so close and is probably considering when to come back inside."

Carlisle thought for a moment, as did everyone. "Maybe… maybe she's immune to your power."

"Like a shield, too?" Bella asked.

"No, I don't think so. Alice can see most things or events that are going to happen, but she always she's those with vampires best, correct?" Alice nodded her head. "And you can see humans well, but not as well as vampires, correct?" Again, Alice nodded. "Well… you've been human and you are a vampire… but… you've never been the combination. Maybe that's the key. Renesmee is unique, incredibly so; maybe a vision cannot hold her."

"Well, that's disappointing." Alice folded her arms over her chest and began to pout. _"You mean I'll never be able to see what's coming from her? Damn."_

I laughed, which only earned a glare from Alice.

"Okay, I gotta ask, where the hell have you been all this time, Bella?" Always the blunt one; Emmett.

"Um, lots of places. I'm assuming you all know that she grew at a really fast rate?" Everyone nodded. Considering the show she put on, I'm surprised they only nodded. "Yeah, well, we couldn't stay in one place very long so we moved a lot. We lived in various cities in Oregon, Washington, Colorado, Montana, South Dakota, Alaska, and even Vancouver for a bit."

I heard Emmett think it. I saw Alice see it. But I reacted too late.

"I can't believe Edward never found you in all those years. Dude, where were you looking?" Emmett looked to me, but I was waiting for Bella's reaction.

Her jaw dropped and she appeared to not be breathing. She looked down at her hands.

Esme. _"She didn't know?"_

Carlisle. _"You didn't tell her, Edward?"_

Jasper._ "Shock; she's completely shocked."_

Alice. _"I told you to tell her, Edward. Damnit! Ugh!"_

Emmett._ "Uh oh, what'd I say?"_

Carlisle was the first to speak, trying to alleviate the silence. "I should be getting to the hospital about now. I'm going to go say goodbye to Renesmee on the way out." He walked over to Bella and me. "Bella, I'll see you again soon. There's so much to catch up on." She stood and he embraced her.

"I'll see you soon, Carlisle." She spoke in a whisper; still completely shocked at Emmett's announcement.

Esme stood and followed Carlisle. "I'll walk you out."

After a few minutes, Bella looked to me. I was still sitting on the sofa trying to form words to explain myself. "Can I speak with you, alone?" She, again, whispered the statement.

"Of course." I led her up the stairs. I could hear the rest of their thoughts as we ascended.

Jasper. _"She's confused and shocked. She wants answers, obviously."_

Emmett._ "Tell her everything... Sorry."_

Alice._ "Tell her the truth, Edward. She needs to know you looked for her. She needs to know you looked for her for fourteen years. She needs to know everything and she needs to tell you some things, too. This is the conversation you two need to have."_

Alice didn't think about the conversation; giving me no hints to how Bella would respond. _Okay, just tell her the truth._

**A/N: So, there it is! I know it's too short and I know it took too long to get updated but I have been told to no longer apologize for having a life, so… yeah, it is what it is.**

**There's still a whole lot more coming. Next chapter will start off with Rosalie and Renesmee; gotta know what they're talking about out there, right? And then… we'll see, hehe. I got the B/E conversation all planned out and I got tons of ideas for the B/A conversation. I think I'm even gonna throw in some Jasper into that one.**

**As always, Read, Review, and Ask! I love your comments, keep them coming!**

**~kmwhyte**


	20. Everything's Gonna be A'Okay, A'Okay

**Disclaimer: I own nothing when it comes to Twilight or the songs I make reference to. I know… I'm sad too!**

**A/N: Starts when Rosalie and Renesmee went outside, just in case that's not clear.**

**RPOV (Rosalie)**

I walked behind Renesmee over towards the set of benches by the edge of the trees. I could hear Carlisle starting to apologize to Bella, but I quickly tuned it out. I didn't want to split my focus from Renesmee.

She was so obviously Edward and Bella's daughter and I was trying so hard not to be jealous. I really was. Bella got exactly what she wanted, plus what I always wanted. Even with all of my beauty and luck in finding Emmett, I still found myself envying Bella. It was utterly ridiculous.

But… she got a baby. She got a daughter and she is beautiful and immortal.

_Maybe you only get a few breaks in your lifetime and she got luckier than me._

She didn't even want children. She just wanted Edward. It was truly unbelievable that she, of all people, should get all the things she wanted, plus what I wanted. Fate was truly unfair.

And it wasn't just the fact that she got a baby; it was the fact that Renesmee wasn't a baby anymore. She was full-grown, nothing short of an eternal teenager, and I missed it. We all missed her growing up. We missed the cute baby stage and the terrifying toddler stage and all the other childhood experiences that would have passed too quickly, even if they weren't accelerated. I could take some solace in the fact that Edward missed all of these moments as well, but the fact that I missed them because he decided to leave her seemed to rattle my temper.

_I'm going to kill him._

"I'm really okay, Aunt Rosalie."

Okay, I'm not as mad now. She called me 'Aunt Rosalie.' She thought of me as her aunt and while it was true in our completely crazy vampire coven/family unit thing, it still made me feel completely thrilled that she thought of me that way after only knowing me for a few hours.

"They didn't mean to infer that you intended to hurt Bella. They know it wasn't like that. I _know _it wasn't like that. As completely foreign as this is to us, we know that it was the only way for you to be born; to survive." I sat next to Renesmee and rubbed her back trying to soothe her.

She sniffled and looked into the trees. "I know. Mom always said that you all would be curious as to how I existed. I just… I don't want them to think badly of me, or you to think badly of me."

I lifted her chin up so I could look into her beautiful eyes. "Renesmee, we do _not_ think badly of you; not at all. We… are completely surprised that you exist, absolutely. But there is _no way_ that any of us think that you are anything short of extraordinary. I can already tell that Carlisle and Jasper are insanely curious and delighted to meet you. Emmett is about ready to tackle you into a hug. Esme can barely contain her motherly excitement and I'm assuming that you already know that Alice is excited since you met her earlier." She nodded with a smile. "And I… I'm just so happy you're here and that you seem to like us so much."

Honestly, I was just happy she liked me. There was no reason for her not to like everyone else; but me…?

If Bella ever had a chance to get revenge for me making her life with us anything but easy, then she could easily tell Renesmee all about how I acted towards her. She could easily make Renesmee hate me if she wanted to.

"Of course, I like you all. I love you all! I've wanted to meet you all for nearly sixteen years. I have a picture of you all by my bed. I've gotten Mom to tell me things about all of you since I realized you all existed."

"And what did your Mom say about all of us?" Again, all I really wanted to know was what she said about me. I couldn't picture her saying anything negative about anyone else, even Edward and Jasper. But me? Yeah, I wasn't convinced.

"She said that Grandpa's a doctor and that he's one of the most compassionate people she's ever met. She said that he risks everything to help people and that he's more human than most of her former friends."

That sounded like Carlisle. It was a pretty accurate description, actually. I nodded for her to continue.

"She said Grandma would love me instantly and that she was one of the most motherly people on the planet. Whenever we watched those old Nick at Nite TV shows where the moms are homemakers and cook constantly, she would compare them to her. She said Grandma made them look negligent."

I laughed at her comparison. I could imagine Esme giving June Clever a run for her money. And I could absolutely see how Bella saw her that way. Esme always liked taking care of Bella when she was around. Bella was the only one she could cook for and actually be a mom for; the rest of us were grown and had been that way for years.

"She said Uncle Emmett is a jokester. That he loves to play pranks and tell bad jokes and that he is just a big kid."

"Yes, my husband is that." Her description put it mildly. Emmett lived to play pranks and he told horrendous jokes, usually at others' expense and about their sexual habits. He was also the biggest man-child that I had ever met and it just made me love him even more. He knew how to keep me calm with his humor when I would otherwise try to kill him. It was honestly a wonder I had never ripped his arm off for making some of the comments he did.

"She also said that he gives the best hugs. And that because he's so scary looking people never bother you or try to push their luck around you. She said that he's a protector and the best big brother that she could ever want."

It was obvious that Bella missed Emmett from her description. _Just as he missed her_.

"She said that Uncle Jasper is quiet and reserved, but that once you get to know him, you know he's just as playful as Emmett and as smart Dad. Mom said that he reads emotions and can change them if he wants; that it's his power. She said that it makes him more in tune with people though. That he is more caring and personable because of it. She said he thinks he's the weak link, but he's more like the backbone because he supports everyone emotionally; whether he uses his power or not."

_Wow, Bella didn't tell her did she?_ I was fairly certain that Bella hadn't told Renesmee that Jasper had attacked her and while I totally understood why she wouldn't, I was just as shocked that she didn't. I would understand if she wanted them to not be around each other. I mean Renesmee had blood in her veins and although she didn't smell like our prey, she so obviously could be. I wouldn't hold it against her, but then again, this was Bella. Bella never saw us for the monsters we were. She never blamed Jasper and she was probably the only one who didn't.

"Mom likes to call me 'mini-Alice.'"

"Really?" I said laughing.

"Yeah, she says I'm just like her. I'm totally into clothes and fashion. I _love_ shopping and if I could get my Mom to go more often, I totally would go everyday. She says I meddle, too; that both Aunt Alice and I can't keep ourselves out of other's business. She never gets mad at me, probably because it reminds her of Alice and I know she misses her, but still, I get scolded."

"How do you meddle?"

She took a deep breath. "Usually, I just end up interacting with kids at school; trying to set up people or give them advice, but Mom usually only scolds me when it has to do with her. Like this morning, she got a little irritated with me." She laughed. "I wanted her to wear a nicer top, but she refused. If Dad hadn't shown up, I was going to suggest a different top to try and sway her, but I got too excited, and ultimately distracted."

_Yup, she definitely took after Alice_. It was ironic since she had never met her till today, but still.

I wasn't blonde enough to not realize who was next; me.

I was a tiny bit nervous that she wouldn't have anything nice to say, or maybe only say the same thing about my beauty and name that she had said before. Maybe Bella didn't have anything else nice to say about me; if anything at all.

Renesmee grabbed my hand and held it. "Mom says you're fiercely loyal and protective over the family; that you would do anything to guard them from someone learning their secret."

_Here it comes…_ I braced myself for the horror.

"She says that you don't show it to everyone, but you care more about them than even they realize. That you pretend to be strong and cold sometimes because that's how people see you and you just go along with it to protect your heart. She said that you are completely different from Uncle Emmett. That when he's child-like and goofy, you're mature and serious; that you compliment each other. She said that you two are crazier than Alice and Jasper and that you're really entertaining."

I thought back to the times that Bella had spent with our family. I had maybe said ten words to her all that time and most of it was in stale greetings. I never liked her, but not because it was her, but because she was putting herself in danger and wanted to give up her perfectly great human life for something she knew nothing about. She had no idea what kind of life this was. Sure, we had each other and that made it significantly better but it was still not a life I would wish for. I couldn't understand why she did.

I couldn't believe she wouldn't say anything negative about me; how I had acted towards her. I wouldn't have been so kind. But, again, this was Bella; Bella was kind.

I sat there grasping Renesmee's hand looking at her with, what I was sure was, shock all over my face. "You okay, Aunt Rose?"

It took me a few seconds, but I recovered. "Yes, yes, I'm perfectly fine. I'm just… kind of touched that your mother would speak so highly of all of us; especially me."

"Why?"

I was fairly sure that she had not told Renesmee about Jasper, which led me to believe she probably hadn't told her about Edward leaving her as well. At least, not to the extent. That he clearly broke her heart.

I couldn't bring myself to say anything negative about Bella, or anyone else, when she had done me the courtesy of keeping my horrible behavior a secret.

"I wasn't close to your Mom before. She was always kind to me, but I just didn't… befriend her as I should have. She was more deserving than I knew; more than me."

Renesmee squeezed my hand. "I'm sure that's not true."

"Oh, it is." I laughed. "But its okay, it'll be okay." I needed to speak with Bella. I needed to apologize. It wouldn't be easy, especially for me, but I also needed to thank her. I didn't deserve a sister like her. I had always thought of her as a sister, she was Edward's mate after all, but still, she was far too kind to me.

Carlisle walked up to us with Esme following close behind. "Renesmee." He called as he approached.

Renesmee turned and smiled. "Hey."

"Renesmee, I wanted to apologize for insinuating that you meant your mother harm. That was not my intent, and far from my belief. I'm sorry."

"It's okay, Grandpa. I know; its fine." She was amazing and we could all see it.

Carlisle sighed and looked from Esme back to her. "I _do_ like that name." Renesmee smiled as she blushed. "And as much as I hate to leave, I need to be getting to the hospital. My shift starts in about an hour and I need to finish some paperwork that I put off from last night. I can't wait to spend some more time with you." Renesmee stood up to hug him.

"Me too."

"I'll see you soon." After Carlisle kissed her on the cheek, he took off for the garage.

Esme looked happily from me to Renesmee. "Well, Renesmee, I know you don't have to eat, but do you?"

Renesmee laughed. "I do, but I'm kinda picky, don't take offense, please?"

"Of course not, but still, I hope that you will spend a lot of time here and I want to be prepared. So what do you like?" Esme put her arm around Renesmee's shoulders and looked to me as we proceeded back towards the house.

We walked through the living room and gained Emmett, as Alice and Jasper headed upstairs. The four of us headed into the kitchen while Renesmee told us about the certain types of food and drink she would actually consume versus blood, if given the opportunity.

**A/N: Don't say it! I know it's short, lol! I tried to make it long. I really did, but there really isn't much to say. I wanted to show why Rose freaked a little and how she feels about Renesmee and Bella and that doesn't require it's own novel.**

**With that said, here's the deal. I've had a CRAZY week and I got totally sidetracked this weekend while trying to find a fanfic I read before I had an amount (so I never favorited it). It was a really good one and I can't get the story out of my head. I can't remember much except that Edward runs into Bella after a few years (New Moon) and they believe each other has moved on. They go to a concert and Bella gets drunk when she sees Tanya flirting with Edward. He takes her back to the hotel, but she thinks it's Alice. She strips to her underwear to sleep and Edward breaks a chair. **

**It sounds good, right? If you know it, send it too me!!! I'm dying. I spend all weekend searching for it and found like fifty stories I want to read and then continued to read about fifteen of them.**

**Okay, enough excuses… Next chapter is the B/E convo. The conversation is written but I'm gonna add it as a dual-POV. (Thank you Emerald Star73 for the idea :)) Hopefully, it will be up in the next few days. Thanks for sticking with me!**

**As always, Read, Review, and Ask! I love your comments, keep them coming!**

**~kmwhyte**


	21. Already Gone

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or the songs I make reference to. If I did own Twilight, this story would be sold in stores everywhere with less grammar/spelling mistakes and I'd be rich… Damn :(**

**A/N: Okay, this time the author's note is prior to the chapter because… well because I have a feeling you all will be a little distracted and won't read it afterwards :)**

**First off, that fanfiction I described is called Rebirth by pdotkin. I got a story alert because she just updated (Thank god, you all tried, but no one found it). Many people asked what it was; it's in my favorites too. In fact, check out all my favorites; they're awesome!**

**Second, this chapter is my newest baby; I haven't loved a chapter so much since the one where Renesmee asked Bella about Edward. And I edited it like crazy; I even printed it out and went over it with a red pen (I am a teacher…). With that said, I WANT COMMENTS! Please? I love everyone's reviews and I know you'll all have some interesting comments (since you may love it or hate it). Keep an open mind for both of them, please, everything happens for a reason! **

**Thanks, Read, Review! ~ kmwhyte**

**EPOV (Edward)**

I walked up the stairs in silence with Bella following close behind me. I led her down the second floor hallway to my room. I held the door open for her and closed it after she walked across to the double-paned window overlooking the backyard.

I leaned against the door, not quite sure how to start the conversation. We were quiet for several minutes before Bella finally spoke.

"How long?"

She didn't look at me; she just continued to stare out the window. "Fourteen years; give or take a few months." I knew that I had spent exactly fourteen years, two months and six days before going back to my family, but I didn't see how that was going to help.

Bella took a deep breath and spoke again. "… When?"

"About six months after I left." Again, I knew it was exactly five months and twenty two days, but I wasn't going to admit that. It shouldn't have taken me that long, not when it came to Bella.

She folded her arms across her chest while still facing away from me. "… W-Where?"

_Everywhere, Bella. I went everywhere looking for you!_ I ran my fingers through my hair. "Everywhere. I went back to Forks first and when I couldn't find you; I called Charlie."

"He never mentioned that…" She whispered.

"I didn't tell him that it was me…" No, Charlie had no idea that it was me; he thought I was  
Mike 'shameless flirt' Newton. I would have never found out anything if I had told him the truth, and he probably would have tried to shoot me if he knew I had been calling from outside his house.

"After that I went to Jacksonville. When I called your mom, she didn't know where you were either-"

"You're the one who blew my cover; you told my parents that I wasn't with the other one," she interrupted.

"I'm sorry about that; it wasn't my intention to cause any problems-"

Bella raised her head and held up a hand without turning around. "No, that wasn't your fault; it was mine." _Oh, thank god, she's not getting any angrier at me…_

"Yes, well, either way… I went to every state after that; searching nearly every city and town I could think of. I must have checked every state at least three times during then. I tracked down every relative I could find of yours. I found cousins you've never even heard of. When you told your parents you were attending University of Alaska I went there. I broke into the dean's office and searched through their files, but never found anyone with the last name Swan. I spend a week tracking down every other Isabella, or Bella, at that school. There were twenty three of them at the time. None of them were you." None even compared to her.

"I never actually went there," she breathed.

"Yes, I figured that one out. After that, I continued to search. I went south, which took twice as long since I couldn't go out into the sun. I went to Mexico, but didn't search there long. I never thought you would actually go there." Bella liked the heat, but she didn't speak Spanish and she wouldn't have traveled that far out of her comfort zone. "After that I headed to Canada. I looked everywhere I could think of, Bella." _I swear._

"Why'd you stop?" She began fiddling with the hem of top.

"At about the ten year mark, I started trying to convince myself that you didn't want to be found. That you had moved on; that you had a life. That you had a good life; even though you weren't telling your parents about it. I hoped that you had found someone to love you the way you should be loved; someone that you loved back. Someone who treated you the way you deserved to be treated; who could give you the things that I couldn't. It took me about four years to actually accept that."

I moved closer to her, but she still didn't turn around so I continued. "The past six years, I… I have been in the worst hell, Bella. During those fourteen years, I had a purpose, a mission. It was still all about you; about me trying to find you. I was miserable without you, but I was still hoping that I would somehow find you. The last six years, though, have been worse than what I imagine hell to be. I have had no reason to keep going. My only reason to keep going is you."

I needed Bella more than I had realized and without a reason to live, exclusively pertaining to her, I was truly lost.

Bella placed her hand on her head and whispered something so low that I barely caught it. Unfortunately it was; 'damnit, Edward.' _That's not a good sign._

I hurried to explain further. "Bella, I'm so sorry. I made the biggest mistake of my existence and I realized it too late. Please. I'm so sorry."

"Edward…" Bella turned around to face me; her arms were at her side and she looked into my eyes. I hadn't read her face in so long, but I knew that look; it meant that she was frustrated and… sad. "It took you six months to realize you made the biggest mistake that either of us has been a part of. Do you know how long it took me to realize it?" There was no right answer to that question. I knew it was a shorter time than it took me, but I knew no answer would help me in trying to explain my reasoning.

"Six seconds. Six seconds, after you walked away and I found myself trying to follow you only to fall on the ground and not get up, I knew that that was the worst thing I would _ever_ have to deal with. I knew that my heart would never recover from that 'mistake.' All the pain, all the fire I went through, doesn't even compare."

"Bella-" I took two steps, slowly, only to have her lift her hands slightly to halt my forward movements.

"Do you realize the things I gave up because of you; the things that I don't have, or have an opportunity for, because of you? I loved you; and you had sex with me and got me pregnant, Edward. I died because of it, or at least I would have if I hadn't been able to find the venom…"

It wasn't lost on me that I could've lost her. It wasn't lost on me that she chose Alice's venom either.

"Bella, I'm sorry-"

"No." Bella took a deep breath and looked back into my eyes. "Just… listen. I haven't seen my parents in twenty years because they can't see me like this. They have no idea that they are grandparents to the most wonderful girl in the world. They think I'm some wandering gypsy who is probably searching the world for her ex-boyfriend who left her. They think I don't care about them.

"I gave up my family and my friends. I gave up finishing high school in Forks and going to college. I gave up being human and growing old. I can't eat; I can't sleep. Do you know how much I miss sleep? Every night I watch Renesmee sleep and just wish I could feel that relief again. I can't go in public in the sunlight. I freakin' sparkle, Edward. And I can't cry. You have _no idea_ how much I wish I could cry; how much I want to cry right now!"

I could see the tears that would never come building in her eyes. She was barely keeping her voice from shaking with the emotion that she was giving off. I'm sure that if Jasper was in the room with us, he would have been on the floor by now.

"Bella, I'm sorry-" I had no idea what to say, but she didn't give me the chance to attempt to say anything either.

"No. Edward, you don't get it." _Oh, I understand; I ruined her life_. "I don't care that I gave that all up. I got the most wonderful thing in the world for it, Renesmee, and I wouldn't change it, _ever_. I always wanted this life, Edward. I knew it would be hard and I knew I'd have to give that stuff up, but I didn't get what I wanted by choosing it. The only reason I ever wanted to become a vampire, before her, was you. I wanted to spend my entire life, a thousand times over, with you. I got exactly what I wanted and something I didn't think to ask for, but I didn't get the reason I wanted it; I didn't get you."

No, apparently, I hadn't understood. "Bella…"

She walked over to me. We were maybe a foot apart and I wanted to reach out to her so much, but I was still unsure of where this conversation was headed. "I really want to cry right now and not just because I didn't get what I wanted, but because you were too late. If you had found me while you were searching… I know I would have forgiven you and ran right into your arms. But, you gave up on us, Edward." _No, I didn't. I just didn't know where to look!_ "And so did I. I held out hope for so long, but after so many years, my unbeating heart died, too. I'm sorry, Edward. I really am, but it's… it's just too late."

_Too late?_ I didn't know what to say. I could convince her that I made a mistake; that I was wrong, that I love her and want her. But I couldn't convince her to love me. I couldn't convince her to give us another chance if she was so set against it. I had nothing to bargain…

"I'm sorry, Edward."

"Bella…" I didn't know what to say. For the first time, I had no idea how to save the situation. I had no idea how to fix it. _I can't fix this…_

"I'm gonna go visit with everyone. I'll see you later, Edward." She walked around me and opened the door to leave. I couldn't turn to watch her leave; the irony was too much. I heard the door click as I stared out the window.

**BPOV (Bella)**

I followed Edward up the stairs and down the hallway. He held open the door for me as I walked in.

I walked across the room looking from side to side slyly; it was obviously his room. He had shelves full of music and books, along with a black leather couch in the corner. There was a large circular carpet with golden shag. It was nearly identical to his room in Forks.

_He just replaced everything._

I could tell that the stereo wasn't hooked up and that most of the CDs weren't even open. I couldn't decide if I wanted to laugh or cry. He got everything brand new and he hadn't even used any of it yet.

I stood in front of a double-paned window showcasing their backyard. I saw Esme and Rosalie walking inside with Renesmee; she looked so happy.

We stood for several minutes, with me staring outside and him leaning against the closed door. Even though I asked to talk to him, I couldn't think of what to say; so I started with the obvious.

"How long?"

"Fourteen years; give or take a few months."

_Oh my god…_ I gasped, disguising it as a deep breath. He spent fourteen years looking for me. How did he never find me?

"… When?"

"About six months after I left."

Six months… six months we were in South Dakota; Hartford to be more specific. I crossed my arms, trying to stay facing the window.

"… W-Where?"

I could hear Edward running his hands through his hair; I had to restrain myself from turning around to look at him. "Everywhere. I went back to Forks first and when I couldn't find you; I called Charlie."

"He never mentioned that…" I whispered. I had spoken to Charlie numerous times then and he never said anyone called about where I was. He mentioned that Mike had asked how I was doing, but that's it all.

"I didn't tell him that it was me… After that I went to Jacksonville. When I called your mom, she didn't know where you were either."

_So, it was him; he blew my secret_. He told my parents that I lied; I should have known… "You're the one who blew my cover; you told my parents that I wasn't with the other one."

"I'm sorry about that; it wasn't my intention to cause any problems-"

I interrupted him by raising my hand. "No, that wasn't your fault; it was mine." It didn't matter anymore. My parents never called the FBI to find me; though Renee threatened to.

"Yes, well, either way… I went to every state after that; searching nearly every city and town I could think of. I must have checked every state at least three times during then. I tracked down every relative I could find of yours. I found cousins you've never even heard of. When you told your parents you were attending University of Alaska I went there. I broke into the dean's office and searched through their files, but never found anyone with the last name Swan. I spend a week tracking down every other Isabella, or Bella, at that school. There were twenty three of them at the time. None of them were you."

_He went there?_ "I never actually went there."

"Yes, I figured that one out. After that, I continued to search. I went south, which took twice as long since I couldn't go out into the sun. I went to Mexico, but didn't search there long. I never thought you would actually go there, even to hide. After that I headed to Canada. I looked everywhere I could think of, Bella."

He searched everywhere. He _did_ look for me. But…

"Why'd you stop?" I fiddled with the hem of my top trying to distract myself.

Edward sighed. "At about the ten year mark, I started trying to convince myself that you didn't want to be found. That you had moved on; that you had a life. That you had a good life; even though you weren't telling your parents about it. I hoped that you had found someone to love you the way you should be loved; someone that you loved back. Someone who treated you the way you deserved to be treated; who could give you the things that I couldn't. It took me about four years to actually accept that."

I heard him approach, but I couldn't bring myself to face him yet. I just couldn't look into his eyes while he was saying this. He wanted me to have a _normal, human_ life, but that was the last thing I could have. He just didn't understand that I could never have that after him. I couldn't love someone else or be happy with someone else when I knew he had been mine once upon a time.

"The past six years, I… I have been in the worst hell, Bella. During those fourteen years, I had a purpose, a mission. It was still all about you; about me trying to find you. I was miserable without you, but I was still hoping that I would somehow find you. The last six years, though, have been worse than what I imagine hell to be. I have had no reason to keep going. My only reason to keep going is you."

"Damnit, Edward." I barely realized that I said it aloud; it was so quiet, but I knew he heard it.

"Bella, I'm so sorry. I made the biggest mistake of my existence and I realized it too late. Please, I'm so sorry."

He made a mistake. I _knew_ it was a mistake; why didn't he realize that earlier? Why couldn't he see that before? Why couldn't he just think about it for a few more days? I would have figured out I was pregnant earlier if I hadn't been distracted by him leaving me. He wouldn't have left then. Damnit…

"Edward…" I turned around to face him. I looked into his honey eyes and saw all the remorse he felt. But, it was too late. "It took you six months to realize you made the biggest mistake that either of us has been a part of. Do you know how long it took me to realize it?"

Edward looked at me, I could tell he wanted to reach for me, but I was glad that he resisted. I don't think I could keep going if he touched me.

"Six seconds. Six seconds, after you walked away and I found myself trying to follow you only to fall on the ground and not get up, I knew that that was the worst thing I would _ever_ have to deal with. I knew that my heart would never recover from that 'mistake.' All the pain, all the fire I went through, doesn't even compare."

"Bella-" I held up my hands to stop him from coming closer to me.

I couldn't let this go; I had to make him understand. I wasn't doing it to make him sad or angry; I just needed him to see why I felt this way. "Do you realize the things I gave up because of you, the things that I don't have, or have an opportunity for, because of you? I loved you, and you had sex with me and got me pregnant, Edward. I died because of it, or at least I would have if I hadn't been able to find the venom…"

I wanted so badly to tell him the truth. The truth about the venom, but he would misunderstand. He would think it meant something that it didn't. It wasn't by choice that his venom coursed through my heart; I hadn't done it on purpose. I didn't know what I was doing when I was in labor; I just knew I needed to save myself for Renesmee, that I needed to survive for her. I did it on instinct and here I was living with both Edward and Alice's venom coursing through my veins for eternity. No, I couldn't tell him.

"Bella, I'm sorry-"

"No. Just…" I took a deep breath. I just wanted him to listen; I just wanted him to understand. "Listen. I haven't seen my parents in twenty years because they can't see me like this. They have no idea that they are grandparents to the most wonderful girl in the world. They think I'm some wandering gypsy who is probably searching the world for her ex-boyfriend who left her. They think I don't care about them."

I had been lying to them for so long. I knew it was necessary, but I couldn't help regretting that. It wasn't because I was feeling guilty; it was because I didn't get the thing that I wanted to lie for.

"I gave up my family and my friends. I gave up finishing high school in Forks and going to college. I gave up being human and growing old. I can't eat; I can't sleep. Do you know how much I miss sleep? Every night I watch Renesmee sleep and just wish I could feel that relief again. I can't go in public in the sunlight. I freakin' sparkle, Edward. And I can't cry. You have _no idea_ how much I wish I could cry; how much I want to cry right now!"

"Bella, I'm sorry-" I saw his miscomprehension.

"No." I took another breath to steady the emotions I was feeling. I was near my breaking point and I was surprised I hadn't heard my voice crack more than it had already. "Edward, you don't get it. I don't care that I gave that all up. I got the most wonderful thing in the world for it, Renesmee, and I wouldn't change it, _ever_." I never regretted her and I would do it all over again for her; whether or not I survived.

"I always wanted this life, Edward. I knew it would be hard and I knew I'd have to give that stuff up, but I didn't get what I wanted by choosing it. The only reason I ever wanted to become a vampire, before her, was you. I wanted to spend my entire life, a thousand times over, with you. I got exactly what I wanted and something I didn't think to ask for, but I didn't get the reason I wanted it; I didn't get you."

_There I said it. God, I wanted him back. Damnit._

"Bella…"

I walked closer to Edward. I wanted to press my hand to his cheek. I saw the pain in his eyes and I wanted to take it away so badly, but I couldn't. I left my hands at my side and looked into his eyes, thanking every force on this Earth that he couldn't hear my mind.

"I really want to…" _I can't say it. I can't say it._ "…Cry right now and not just because I didn't get what I wanted, but because you were too late. If you had found me while you were searching… I know I would have forgiven you and ran right into your arms."

If I could cry, the tears would drown me right at this moment. "But, you gave up on us, Edward." I took another unnecessary breath and blinked back the unshed tears. "And so did I. I held out hope for so long, but after so many years, my unbeating heart died, too. I'm sorry, Edward. I really am, but it's… it's just too late."

His face contorted into something that I thought I'd never see; raw pain. It was certainly something I never wanted to cause. I knew he was at a loss for words; that was a relief because so was I.

"I'm sorry, Edward."

"Bella…" There was nothing either of us could say, we both knew it.

"I'm gonna go visit with everyone. I'll see you later, Edward."

I walked past him and opened the door. I looked back to his beautiful hair and body before walking out. I leaned against the opposite door from Edward's and fought to keep my body standing up straight. I wanted to cry more than any other time in my life; more than when I found out I was going to be a single mother, more than when I was being chased by James, more than when Edward left me. I couldn't control my emotions.

_What did I just do?_


	22. Cry

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or the songs I make reference to. If I did own Twilight, this story would be sold in stores everywhere with less grammar/spelling mistakes and I'd be rich… Damn :(**

_If anyone asks,  
I'll tell them we've both just moved on.  
When people all stare,  
I'll pretend that I don't hear them talk.  
Whenever I see you,  
I'll swallow my pride, and bite my tongue.  
Pretend I'm OK with it all,  
Act like there's nothing wrong at all._

_Is it over yet?  
Can I open my eyes?  
Is this as hard as it gets?  
Is this what it feels like to really cry?  
Cry_

_If anyone asks,  
I'll tell them we just grew apart.  
What do I care,  
If they believe me or not.  
Whenever I feel,  
Your memory is breaking my heart.  
I'll pretend I'm OK with it all,  
Act like there's nothing wrong._

Cry ~ Kelly Clarkson

**BPOV**

I stood there for several minutes against the door across from Edward's room. He hadn't made a noise since I shut the door. Unfortunately, I wasn't having the same success. I was futilely trying to calm down my unnecessary breathing. It was insane. I didn't even need to breathe, but here I was damn near hyperventilating.

I placed my hands over my silent heart, trying to breathe normally when the door behind me began to move backwards, ever so slowly. I turned in a flash to see who was witnessing my breakdown. _Please don't be Renesmee. Please don't be Renesmee._

Jasper.

"Come on in, Bella." He smiled and opened the door wide enough that I could see Alice sitting on a couch off to the side of room. It was placed off to the side in front of a set of double doors; a closet no doubt.

I walked in till I was dead-center in the room; equally far away from Jasper as I was from Alice. Neither made a move to get closer. "So… how much did you hear?" I knew the answer, come on, we're all vampires now. I knew their limitations and this was hardly outside of them.

"Actually, we didn't hear." I looked to Alice. _Oh, please._ She saw the disbelief and started again. "Bella, can you hear Edward now?" I shook my head. "Well, trust me, he moving and talking to himself. If Esme hadn't put some extra 'insulation' in these walls and doors, we would all be going nuts."

_What?_ "Huh?" I couldn't think of a better way to ask; my heart was still asking my brain what exactly I just did, and why.

"We're three couples and a distraught loner, we need the privacy. It took us _far too long_ to figure that out." Jasper laughed at Alice's statement.

Okay, that made sense. Who really wants to hear Rose and Emmett during the night anyways; or whenever they're alone…

"But just because we didn't hear, doesn't mean we don't know. I felt all the emotions coming from the both of you and Alice saw it all, slightly before it happened."

_Fan-freaking-tasic._ I was quiet several moments before Jasper decided to move closer and start commenting on that particular conversation.

"Bella, I know you don't want to talk about it; I can feel that." I looked at him without agreeing, or disagreeing. "But you know we're here for you. I can feel everything you're feeling; that's why I finally decided to open the door. You're feeling guilty and remorseful and repentant, but you're also feeling love. You still love him." None of it was formed into questions; they didn't have to be. He could feel all of my emotions and I knew it was making him uncomfortable as well.

"I'm sorry, Jasper."

"Why in the world are you apologizing? I'm the one who needs to do that."

I stared at him blankly; I was completely unsure why he needed to apologize. He read my confusion, sighed and continued. "First, I need to apologize for that conversation. I may have heightened the emotions a bit. You felt everything on your own, but I made them more… intense. You two needed for those things to be in the open."

I felt a moment of anger, but it passed on my own motivations. It's true; I needed to say all the things that I had told Edward. I was never screaming at him. I never felt rage or anger; in fact I was rather calm while I told him about my 'issues.' "It's okay. You're right; there's nothing to forgive."

"Maybe. You seem to be stronger than my abilities." _Huh?_ "You were keeping something from him, lying, and I tried to get you to reveal that, but you wouldn't." So he's the reason I wanted to tell Edward about the venom and wanting him back. Okay, now I was a bit mad.

"Don't do that again… please." I added the please because, again, I wasn't mad at Jasper. It wasn't his fault, but he still had a hand in it.

"I won't, but on to my next apology; I'm sorry for what I did on your birthday twenty-"

I interrupted him. "No. No, Jasper. That wasn't your fault. It was nobody's fault and I won't have you apologize for it." I'm sure he felt my conviction.

"Bella, we both know that my… attack set Edward's decision to leave. If I had had more control… we wouldn't have left, at least not then. We all would have found out that you were pregnant and it all would have been different. You and Edward would be together and we would have all watched Renesmee grow up. She would have known us for that last twenty years. Bella, you know it's true. I lost Edward for you and I lost the family for Renesmee."

I had just been thinking the same thing, but I blamed Edward. If he hadn't left, I would have figured it out and we _all_ would have been together. How could I blame Edward and not blame Jasper? It was a double standard. Damn.

"Jasper; that was _not_ your fault. I didn't blame you after it happened and I certainly didn't blame you when Edward left. Hell, I haven't blamed you once in the past twenty years and I never blamed you while it was happening. Believe me, I understand the thirst. I'm not going to accept your apology because it's not justified and as far as Renesmee is concerned; that's nothing as well. She would never blame you for something like that."

"You didn't tell her, did you?"

"No. There's no reason to." Jasper started to open his mouth, but I interrupted him. "Would you ever hurt her?" I knew the answer just as well as he did.

"No, of course not." He said it fiercely, protectively.

"See, then you don't owe me or her anything; not even an explanation. She loves the whole family, including you."

"But I'm the reason she hasn't had the family for twenty years."

"Don't even think about it, she'll tell you you're being ridiculous. She knows things happen and she knows better than anyone, aside from Alice, that things are meant to happen. There is _no one_ to blame for this." _Not even Edward._ I resigned and Jasper nodded.

"I've missed you, Bella." Jasper walked over to me with his arms opened wide. I fell right into the embrace.

"I've missed you, too, Jazz."

He laughed in my ear. "You've never called me that before."

"Well, we've never talked like this before." I laughed too.

Alice had been silent during the entire exchange, probably sensing that Jasper needed to clear the air with me as well. I heard a low 'aww, brother and sister' from her direction and laughed in Jasper's ear again.

He pulled away. "Alright, let me go pull Edward out of his mood; make sure he doesn't plan a trip to Italy or anything. We'll be downstairs when you two are done talking." Jasper smiled to Alice and left the room. I had no idea why Edward would go to Italy, but if he wasn't going then it wasn't important.

I walked over to Alice and sat on the other side of the couch. She smiled; it was the 'you have some explaining to do' smile. I braced myself for the interrogation and nodded.

"So, what did you lie about, Bella?" Her tone was pleasant and it took me a few seconds to remember what exactly I was lying about. _Oh… the venom._ Yeah, I didn't want to disclose that information right now, especially with Edward in the house.

"I can't Alice. Just.., not now, okay?"

"Fine, we'll start with an easier topic." I nodded my appreciation. "Why did you use my venom?"

_Seriously? Did she really just ask that?_ I couldn't help it. The reaction was just instinct. I started laughing hysterically. _She just asked the same question twice and she had no idea. She thought it was an 'easier' topic. Good God was she wrong_. I continued to laugh and Alice just stared at me. She went through several emotions and I was glad that Jasper had left the room; first she was confused, then frustrated, and then angry, seeing as I wasn't stopping in my laughing fit.

"Why the hell are you laughing?" She didn't scream, but her tone told me it was just the calm before the storm.

It took me a moment to regain my composure. "Because… it's the same topic." With that I laughed again.

It took her a few seconds to put it together. "You lied about using my venom?" The anger was gone; back to confusion.

I finally stopped laughing. This wasn't a laughing time, but laughter was helping me cope; although it was also making me look like a complete idiot. "Not exactly. Alice, you can't tell anyone, especially Edward." She nodded. "It's really complicated, but the short version is… I used both yours and Edward's."

"What?" She was completely motionless except for her eyes which were blinking with lightning speed.

"Okay, long version; after I found the venom I wasn't sure whose to use. I decided on yours, but I couldn't seem to put Edward's back. I 'logically'," _like rational logic had a lot to do with it_, "decided to keep two out in case I was in too bad of shape or something. I didn't know what to expect or if one would be enough. When I went into labor, I had Angela bring the two over. I never told her what they were or what to do. I passed out while Renesmee was coming out of my stomach and Angela injected one of the syringes into my leg out of panic. The fire woke me back up and as soon as she took Renesmee and left, I shot the other venom right into my heart. I didn't know whose it was at the time; all I could think was I needed to survive for Renesmee. I didn't know which was which till afterwards."

Alice was quiet as she processed my story, then she finally asked. "Whose venom went into your leg?"

I could tell it was a round-about question. She was just using deductive reasoning to see which venom went into my heart. "Yours. Yours went into my leg."

"So Edward's went into…" She didn't finish the statement.

"…my heart. Yeah." I looked down as the white carpeted floor.

"Why didn't you just say so? You were trying to survive."

"Because that's not how they'll see it. That's not how he'll see it. Everyone will think that it means something more that Edward's venom went straight into my heart. I mean, come on, you've got to see the metaphor there."

She nodded. "Yeah, but Bella, isn't it true? You _do _love him."

I sat there for several seconds, thinking of how to explain my own emotions; emotions that were confusing the hell out of me at the moment. "I do, God, of course I love him. But it's not the same as it was. I didn't do it on purpose. After it was done and I knew his venom was in me forever, not to mention, coursing through my heart, I was so angry. That's not why I kept his venom out."

"Then why?" It was an obvious question, but I didn't have an answer.

"I don't know. Honestly, for the past twenty years I have tried not to think about it. I pretty much convinced myself that it was only your venom that turned me." Alice placed her hand on my shoulder. "You want to know something?" I was trying to change the subject and whether she realized it or not, she smiled in encouragement. "Renesmee's middle name is Alice."

I didn't have time to react; Alice was across the couch hugging me for dear life, thanking me continuously. "Come on Alice, it was kind of a no-brainer. You helped me so much. She's alive because of you. Plus, you're my sister, I love you." I gripped her back. We were silently having a hugging war, testing my strength against hers.

***

We walked downstairs hand in hand. I'm pretty sure Alice thought I was gonna make a run for it when I saw the whole family and Edward with Renesmee.

As we walked into the kitchen, the vision in my head paled in comparison to what I saw. Renesmee was sitting at a large island in the middle of the kitchen; the island could have been a dining table for all the space it provided. She was seated on a barstool with Rosalie to her left and Emmett to her right. Edward had a hand on her shoulder while he stood behind her. Across from her, Esme and Jasper sat on matching barstools. I smiled despite myself.

She was happy. No, she was blissful. She was spending time with her Dad and family. That was all she ever wanted and now she had it. I didn't want to interrupt, but Alice pulled me along.

"Hi Mom. Hey Aunt Alice." She turned around to face me and I went to kiss her hair. I looked to Edward and he smiled weakly. Emmett stood up to give his seat, not that I needed it, and then leaned on the counter next to me.

Emmett smiled and looked to Esme as he spoke. "So _Grandma_ is asking Nes here all about the different things she will eat and drink, along with anything else she would like to have here when she visits. _Grandma's_ list is getting quite long." Emmett kept laughing, but no one else joined in. I was getting the feeling that he had been drilling this particular joke into the ground and everyone else was getting pretty tired of it.

"Esme, you don't have to do that." I looked to her and back to Renesmee. I knew it was just as much Esme's motherly pushing as it was Renesmee's spoiled side shining through. "She barely eats human food anyways and she doesn't need you to buy special things for her."

"Nonsense, she is my granddaughter and I will spoil her if I choose to." Everyone laughed and I just shook my head; there was no way I was winning this argument.

I looked to my watch, 7:14pm.

"Honey, we should probably get home, you have homework." I combed Renesmee's hair with my fingers and she began to frown.

"But, it'll take ten minutes for me to finish it. Can't we stay longer?" I was about to give in, it was her first time with the Cullens after all. I remembered what that was like.

Alice piped in then. "It's okay Renesmee, you need to get ahead in your school work because we're going shopping on Saturday and it'll be an all day experience. It's a girl's day. Right?" She looked to Rose and she nodded. "Right?" She looked to me; her glare started to become threatening.

"Fine, I'll go shopping." I huffed. It's not like I had a choice in the matter. Either I go or I stay at home all alone and risk a visit from Edward or one of his brothers. Alice had already threatened me upstairs declaring that if I didn't go she saw Edward coming over to talk followed by Emmett coming to tease me about being a vampire. I figured she was just trying to scare me, but knowing her she'd make it happen.

"Awesome, I can't wait!" Renesmee looked at me and had the biggest smile on her face so I smiled back.

"Come on, I'll drive you back home so Renesmee doesn't have to run." I nodded to Alice and got up to say my goodbyes.

I thanked Esme and hugged her along with Emmett and Jasper. I smiled at Rose and she smiled the most genuine smile back to me. There's a first. I walked towards the door where Edward had been holding it open. "Thanks Edward. I'll see you tomorrow." He nodded with a 'bye Bella.'

Renesmee gave him a hug and his whole body language changed. "I'll see you tomorrow, sweetie."

"Okay, Dad." Alice put her arm around her shoulders and ushered us to her Porsche.

"Come on, I need to pick out clothes for you two tomorrow. It'll be cloudy, but the whether won't be as cold." I smiled as sat in the passenger seat. She and Renesmee were going to drive me nuts on Saturday.

**A/N: Okay, chapter twenty one, YAY! I think this will be the last chapter that is really sad for a while. I have a fun mall trip mapped out for the girls. There will be a lot of Alice/Renesmee and Bella/Rosalie in the upcoming chapters.**

**Now for those of you who are worried about Edward. Don't worry, he's fine. Jasper and him talked and he knows Bella needs time, but he did not hear anything Bella said to Alice about her feelings or the venom. Also, I put in the whole Italy thing as joke, one of my reviewers said he was probably planning a trip and I thought it was so funny I decided to write it in.**

**Anyways, good news/bad news time again. Good news for me: I got a temp (3 months) job and am moving in the next few weeks. Bad news for you: I probably will become a bit worse about updating. I'm still going to at least update once a week (hopefully twice a week and whenever I can).**

**As always, Read, Review, Comment!**

**~ kmwhyte**


	23. Bad Influence

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or the songs I make reference to. If I did own Twilight, this story would be sold in stores everywhere with less grammar/spelling mistakes and I'd be rich… Damn :(**

**BPOV**

I wanted to strangle them.

I wanted to dismantle my sister and gag my daughter while we ran away from Alice while she was trying to reassemble herself. I could take out Rosalie if need be; hell she'd probably help me and distract Renesmee at this point. She was obviously just as bored as I was.

It had been five hours of nonstop shopping and I literally wanted to die standing in our _third_ store. Yeah, five hours and we had only been to three freaking stores. Did I mention that we had just arrived at the third store ten minutes ago? I am going to kill them.

They were feeding off each other. Renesmee would hold up a top to get Alice's opinion and Alice, in turn, would find twenty-something pairs of pants to accompany it. Then Alice would find a skirt she thought would go with Renesmee's complexion and they would have to design an entire outfit around it, complete with accessories.

I, however, stood off to the side hoping to go unnoticed by the shopping maniacs.

I would have never imagined that Alice could actually be worse to shop with, but when you add Renesmee… Let's just say, I was glad I was already dead. I was about ready to die of boredom.

"How long can Renesmee keep going?" Rosalie whispered to me; not that it mattered, both Alice and Renesmee were too focused to hear her.

"I don't know. I've never let her loose like this. Now that she has a partner in crime, she may not stop." I sounded sad, depressed even. My daughter had gone over to the dark side.

"The mall doesn't close till ten; we've got five more hours of this." Rosalie sounded desperate.

"What do you suggest?" I was willing to take a criminal partner of my own if it got me away from this horror movie.

"They won't notice if we're gone; they haven't asked an opinion of us for hours and they aren't even looking for clothes for us anymore. Why don't we find a more interesting store?"

"Sounds good." I was frantic to escape the shopping duo and we could easily catch up to them later.

***

Rosalie and I ended up in a local music store. I was flipping through older rock CDs at vampire speed since there were only a few customers and they were all scanning the new releases and top forty hits.

Rosalie stood across from me pretending to be interested in the CDs as well. I kept seeing her look up, open her mouth, and then return to her prior stance. She went through the motions several times before I couldn't take it anymore. She obviously had something to say; if I was human, I never would have seen the motions, but my senses were heightened enough now. Without looking up I asked, "what's on your mind, Rosalie?"

I watched from under my eyelids as she gaped at me. As I looked up, she recovered her poise. "What do you mean?"

"You want to say something; I can see you opening and closing your mouth." She looked at me, gaping again. "Vampire, now; remember?" I whispered.

Rosalie looked down and nodded her head slightly. "Right. Well, I wanted to talk to you."

_Yeah, I got that…_ "Okay, go ahead."

"Bella, I'm sorry." It came out in a rush and I barely caught it.

That's unexpected. I could see the effort she was putting in towards me and Renesmee, but here she was actually apologizing. _Did Emmett put her up to this?_ "Why are you sorry?"

She let out an exasperated breath and continued to look anywhere but at my eyes. "For all of it, Bella. I was a bitch to you and I didn't even have a good reason for it. You never did anything to me and I was still cruel to you. It wasn't fair and… I'm sorry."

_Wow. Rosalie just apologized to me._ _Where's the hidden camera?_

I was completely floored by her admission. "Thank you, Rose." She nodded. "I hate to ruin this, but… why now? Why apologize at all; I never held it against you?"

She finally met my eyes. "That's why." _Huh?_ "You never held my behavior against me. You could have, but you never did. You could have gotten Edward, or any of the rest of them, to threaten me or defend you, but you didn't. You could have told Renesmee I was an evil bitch and to ignore me if she ever met me, but you didn't. You told her wonderful things about me, things that are completely sugar-coated, when you didn't have to." She looked back to the CDs. "I wouldn't have been so kind," she added under her breath.

I thought back; I had never told Renesmee anything horrible about anyone of the Cullens. Why would I? They were completely wonderful and they were family. She deserved to make her own memories and experiences with them without my influence. Besides, I truly never held Rosalie's behavior against her; she was protecting her family. I could admire that, even more now.

"Can I ask you something, Bella?" Her voice pulled me from my thoughts and I merely nodded. "What's it like?"

"What's what like?"

She paused. "Being a mom?"

_Oh._ Suddenly it all made sense. It wasn't the fact that I was willing to give up my life to be with Edward when I was eighteen and human that made her mad; it was that I was willing to give up my humanity, or rather the ability to be a mother. She never got the chance for that. She resented me because of that.

"That's it, isn't it?" I phrased it as kindly and gently as I could. "That's why you acted the way you did towards me; because I was giving up the thing you wanted."

"Yeah," she looked down as she spoke. "I always wanted to be a mother. You didn't know what you were going to give up. You can't know what you'll want in ten or fifteen years when you're eighteen; you had your whole life ahead of you. But you were just going to give it up; I couldn't bear that."

I saw her point; I saw it from both sides.

As the human teenager completely in love with Edward, I wouldn't have thought twice about not having children. Until I realized I was pregnant, I never wanted to be a mother and if I hadn't been and Edward would have changed me; I probably would have never thought about it.

But as the vampire mother that I was…

I see her point completely. I love being a mother, but even more than that, I love being a mom to Renesmee. She is my world and I would never change anything that led to her being mine. Knowing what I know now, I wouldn't choose Edward and that life over her. I just wouldn't.

"I get that now. Back then I would have thought you were wrong about me, but now… I agree with you, Rose. I didn't know what I would be giving up. I probably wouldn't have missed it. But having it now, I would never give it up. I wouldn't give Renesmee up for anything, even Edward."

"It's that wonderful; being a mom?" She looked so sad.

"Yeah. It has its moments. Like now; I seriously wanted to strangle her back there with Alice. But… she's my daughter. Granted she grew too quickly and she is smarter than me, and has been for years, but she's my little girl. She's me; she came from me and I can barely fathom that." I shook my head. I still could barely wrap my head around the fact that I actually had a daughter; she was so surreal.

"What was it like being pregnant?" I could see how loaded that question was. Not only did Rose want to be a mom, but she wanted the whole experience.

"Honestly?" She nodded. "It kinda sucked. I mean feeling her move and knowing that she was mine was incredible. I already felt that connection, but it hurt like hell. She grew so quickly and it felt like I was carrying a sixty pound bowling ball in my abdomen. The morning sickness sucked, because it wasn't actually in the morning. It was all-freaking-day. And when she finally was about to be born, I felt like my spine had been severed by a hacksaw." She looked at me, completely shocked. Most women say it's the most wonderful experience in the world. Maybe it is for them and maybe it's just because my baby was half-vampire that I felt the weight of it, but honestly, I'm not buying that. It hurt and I imagined it hurt for everyone. They're all Liars "It's the final product, Rose. The pregnancy was the hard part, but for me it only lasted about a month."

She nodded again. "You mind if I ask you a question?" She smiled at me and nodded. "Actually, it's more of a favor?"

Rosalie's face shifted for a second before she smiled even more brightly. "What are sisters for?"

I laughed. "Well sister dear," she laughed at my response. "I was hoping you could be the sane aunt for Renesmee. Alice is great; you know I love her, but they're going to get in trouble shopping all the time and there are going to be times when she needs that more-mature person. They'll be close too, I'm sure, but you can relate better. You remember what it's like to be human and Alice doesn't. I know Renesmee already loves you and I can tell you love her back. I figured that out pretty quickly when you went outside with her the other day to make sure she was okay. I appreciated that more than you will ever know…" I looked to Rose, hoping that I didn't need to continue my explanation. She could be the kind of Aunt or friend that Renesmee never had. Someone that cared for her, but didn't discipline her or judge her. If anyone was capable of that, it was Rose.

Rose flew around the CD storage units to me. "I would be honored," she whispered as she hugged me tightly.

I had never hugged Rosalie before and it felt nice; like she was actually a sister.

Rose quickly disentangled herself from my arms. We may have bonded, but this was still Rosalie Hale, ice queen. "I gotta ask…" I nodded. I knew this was coming, but honestly, I though Emmett or Esme would be the culprit. "What's going on between you and Edward?"

I shook my head. "Nothing."

"And is that his decision, or yours?"

She knew; and she knew that I knew she knew. _Oh, good lord, did I just think that?_

I shook my head, clearing my thoughts. "Mine, Rose. I just… I don't know what to think about him anymore."

"Do you love him?" _Well, just start off with the easy questions, why don't ya?_

"I do, but I don't know in what regards anymore. I haven't let myself think of him as anything other than Renesmee's father for years now. I don't know how to work around that. I'm not sure I want to." I added the last sentence quietly, but it's not like she wouldn't hear it.

"You know he loves you and that he searched for you for god knows how many years."

"Yeah, I know." I just didn't know where to put that.

"I never thought I'd see this day," she mumbled.

"And what day is that?" I said, growing slightly irritated.

She laughed. "You pick; the day that Bella Swan dismisses Edward or the day that Edward doesn't get everything he wants."

I rolled my eyes; apparently both were true. "He left me Rose. He told me he didn't want me and that he didn't love me and then he just left me there in the woods. I don't know how to line that up with the fact that he searched for me and never stopped caring, along with the fact that he wants me back. I'm trying to make sense out of it, but I just don't know right now."

It was the most honest answer concerning my feelings for Edward that I had made in the last week. It was exactly how I felt, because truly I didn't know anything except the facts. But the facts weren't helping me with my emotions; they just caused them to conflict more.

Rosalie turned and grabbed my arm. "Wait. He told you he didn't love you?" she hissed

"Yeah, I believed it too." I didn't realize it wasn't common knowledge; granted it wasn't like I published the information for Renesmee.

"That bastard, I'll kill him." She was seeing red now and I was kind of scared for Edward. I had spent years being terrified of Rose; I still didn't want to end up on her bad side.

I rubbed her hand on my arm. "Rose. Calm down; I don't want Renesmee to know about how Edward treated me that day or why he left. It's just between us, right?"

She looked at me like I had three heads. "You're serious?"

"Yes, I am. I don't want her to know why he left me. She wouldn't see him the same. I know she wouldn't hold him, or even Jasper, accountable; she's far too understanding, but she would never forget that and I don't want her to know because of me. If Edward chooses to tell her, its fine. but I won't harm his relationship with her."

"Fine." She was pissed, but at least she wasn't pissed at me and she wasn't going to kill him. She might make things harder for him, but I could deal with that. What I couldn't deal with is if she made Renesmee question her family. She needed to have relationships without other's influence.

**A/N: Fantastic, another chapter! Hope you all like it, let me know. I think it has a good mix of fun and humor; it even gets a little sappy with them. I'm not sure where that came from but I love it.**

**It will probably be a little while before the next chapter but rest assured it will come. I'm moving next weekend and am packing all week so I won't have much time to write. If I do it will probably be in the missing moments.**

**For those of you who don't know; I added another story with is a companion to this one. It has missing moments and outtakes from Give Her Some Credit. Right now there's just a convo between Edward and Jasper but I plan to add more.**

**BTW; if you're missing me, head over to DementedEvilPixie* (I messed up the name, this one is correct, Sorry!) and read some of her stories. You'll get some crazy comic relief from her :)**

**As always; Read, Review, and Comment!**

**Kmwhyte**


	24. We Don't Care if we Cause Commotion

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or the songs I make reference to. If I did own Twilight, this story would be sold in stores everywhere with less grammar/spelling mistakes and I'd be rich… Damn :(**

**RPOV (Renesmee)**

I tossed a sheer royal blue blouse into the pile that Aunt Alice was gathering consisting of clothes to be tried on. The pile was up to my knee already and all the garments were laid flat on the floor; heaven forbid they are ruffled before we try them on.

I finished with the clothes rack I was searching and then looked around me. Mom was gone. Aunt Rosalie was gone. I hadn't noticed that they left.

"Aunt Alice, where'd Mom and Aunt Rose go?"

She didn't even look up from the rows and rows of jeans she was sorting. "They left about fifteen minutes ago. They're fine."

_Okay, that didn't really answer my question, but okay._

Realization dawned; this was my chance to get some answers. I watched as Aunt Alice walked over to the pile with, yet another, twenty five pairs of jeans, give or take, in various cuts and washes.

"Here; you take these and I'll grab those. Grab the last stall on the left; it's the largest and we can share." I followed her instructions. I didn't want to cause any more attention to my nearly five-foot aunt carrying, probably, eighty pounds worth of clothing.

Once the door shut, I figured it was now or never. _Answers; just get the answers, Renesmee. _

"Hey, Aunt Alice?"

"Hmm?" she mumbled as she pulled a white lace top over her head.

"I need to talk to you." She looked at me through the mirror and nodded for me to continue. "I have some questions I need to ask you, about Mom and Dad." Those last four words completely froze her. She just continued to stare. She didn't blink or even breathe. Granted I knew she didn't need to, but it would have made me feel better if she did. "Aunt Alice…"

Her head twitched. "Um, what do you want to know?"

I looked down as I pulled a pair of dark wash boot cut jeans up and fastened them. "Everything."

"You should ask your mom, Renesmee."

I should, but I couldn't. I wanted the truth and I knew she was hiding things about their relationship from me; I just knew it. "I want you to tell me."

"You should ask your dad then."

"Aunt Alice, I don't want to ruin it. I just got him back; I don't want to freak him out by asking all these questions. Besides, you won't lie to me," I pleaded with her. I was positive she wouldn't lie, maybe sugarcoat, but not lie.

She sighed deeply. "You mom is going to kill me; I'm sure of it."

"Do you know when she'll be back?" I could go with a cliff notes version if necessary.

"I have no idea. She probably hasn't made the decision of when she's coming back yet and either way, once she's with you, I won't see her." She sighed again. "We probably have an hour or so though, she won't come back willingly when there's shopping."

I nodded. "Go ahead, Renesmee. What do you want to know?"

"I want to know why he left her. She said he had to go because Grandpa got another job, but that's not true, is it?" She shook her head. "I figured that when I found your note."

"You found my note?" she asked suddenly.

"Yeah, I was snooping a while back when Mom was out. I found it then, along with everything else left in the trunk." She laughed at something I had obviously missed, but I continued. "So what really happened?"

"You can't just hear why he left without the back story, you know? What do you know about their relationship?"

_Nothing_. "Not much; I know they were in high school together in Forks. I know that they loved each other and that she was practically a part of the family. And they conceived me before he left. That's it."

She let out a short laugh. "All true, but my version is better." She patted the suede ottoman sitting in the middle of the larger-than-the-rest dressing room and I joined her. "Your mom came to Forks in the middle of the school year and she was the 'shiny new toy' according to one of her new classmates. Everyone was fascinated, but she was shy and didn't want the attention. She was curious about us all, of course, and we tried to see what she thought of us through Edward but-"

"He couldn't read her thoughts." I interrupted, smiling.

"Yes, he was so mad that she was immune. It was driving him insane, but he wouldn't admit it. Anyways, she ended up being in one of his classes and the moment she walked in he smelled her blood in a more concentrated form.

"You know what it feels like to smell human blood; you get thirsty just like we do, but you don't feel it as strongly I'm sure." I nodded. I was able to ignore it completely once I accepted that it was there. "Well, your mom's blood was more potent than others, especially to your dad. There are certain people in the world that just smell… better, more delectable than others. They call to us and it's nearly impossible to resist, and that's what it was like for them. I have no clue how he resisted during that hour, but he did." _Because he loved her, obviously._

"After school that day, he fled to Alaska to visit some friends of ours to avoid hurting her. After a while, he realized he couldn't do that anymore and he came back to face her. He tried treating her like any other human, but he started to become fascinated with her. Honestly, he was falling in love with her, he just didn't know it."

It was love at first sight, almost, whether he knew it or not. _That's sweet._

"Everything changed one morning though. Bella was standing at her truck before school and the roads were icy. One of the students lost control of his van and it slid. There was no way it would miss her and I saw that she wouldn't survive mere seconds before it happened.

"Edward just ran, at full speed, and stopped the van with his body. He moved her about three times because the van seemed to be destined for some purchase. The family panicked because of the risk of exposure and Edward decided to just convince her that she hadn't seen anything, but she wasn't having that. She never told anyone and Edward just ignored her."

_Poor Mom, she probably thought she was going crazy._

"That went on for a long time. She went with her friends one evening to Port Angeles and she ended up wandering off by herself. Your dad decided to follow her, just to keep her safe, but he lost her for a bit. She ended up in a bad part of the town and some guys started following her. Your mom is a magnet for danger; it's a wonder she wasn't drawing in all kinds of monsters with her luck.

"Anyways, your dad rescued her and that was it. They started spending more time together, getting to know each other, and when she finally confronted him about what he is; she didn't care."

He rescued her from a car crash and possible-rapists; how could she not love him?

"So what changed?" Something had to go bad for it all to end up like this…

"It wasn't just one thing, Nes. It was a lot of things, honestly. First of all, there was the whole James thing." I looked at her, clearly conveying my confusion. "You don't know about that either, figures. Okay, shortly after Edward brought Bella to meet us all, we all went out to play baseball."

I laughed; I couldn't help it. She just said it like it was nothing and I knew that it was anything but. Mom had told me about the 'Cullen Baseball League.' I knew the antics that ensued and the crazy regulations that they had adopted. "Sorry, continue."

She nodded, surely understanding that I was familiar with that part of the story. "Okay, so we were playing baseball and three nomads happened to hear us. We couldn't run, so we tried to hide Bella among us. At the time, it seemed like a good idea, we were a large enough coven and she was always kind of pale. But one of them, James, noticed the scent when a _damn_ wind came along and he was instantly intent on killing her; and purely for sport since we were determined to protect her."

I was speechless; danger magnet is an understatement.

"Jasper and I took her to Arizona to hide out while the others protected her dad and stayed to fight, but James ended up following us. The female that was with him stayed in Forks to confuse them and the third, another man, left all together.

"James ended up coercing Bella to him by telling her that he had her mom-"

I gasped; he took Grandma Renee? I knew she was fine, but oh my god.

"He didn't have her really; just a video tape that came in quite handy for him." She rubbed my back and continued. "Bella was trying to protect everyone though; her mom, Jasper and me, Edward; all of us.

"James bit her" _What?!_ "Calm down," she whispered as my heartbeat picked up. "We got there in time, obviously. Edward was able to suck out the venom; like a snake bite and we killed James. Bella was messed up pretty badly, but she was fine." I nodded.

"How was he able to do it? You said her blood was so strong for him; how could he just suck out the venom and not continue to drain her?" I was glad he did it, but it was mindboggling.

"I don't know how exactly; there isn't a real reason except that he loved her too much to lose her."

"But?" Here it comes; come on, bring it on.

She smiled. "There isn't a 'but,' Renesmee, there's just more. You need to know that Edward's greatest fear was something happening to Bella because of what we are. He was so afraid that one of us would hurt her or cause her to be hurt, or worse. And that's exactly what happened with James, but it wasn't the last time.

"On Bella's birthday, we had a party at our house for her. It was awesome; the decorations were perfect and I got a beautiful cake." _Yuck._ "Everything was perfect, but" _Here it comes…_ "Something happened that wasn't… expected." She stopped, deciding what to say and how to word it.

"I don't want you to think badly of him, because it wasn't his fault. Any one of us could have done it given the circumstances, but he was more susceptible." I waited for the explanation. _What did Dad do?_ "Your mom was opening her presents and she got a paper cut and everything happened very quickly, even by vampire standards."

"Dad attacked her?" _It would make sense; why he left, why she wasn't that happy to see him, and why she never told me._

"No, your Dad didn't… but Jasper did. His bloodlust has always been manageable, but compared to the others, it's slightly uncontrolled. He hadn't been practicing the diet for as long. His thirst took over and he regretted it the second it happened.

"Edward pushed Bella out of the way and pushed Jasper away so Emmett and Rose could get him out, but the damage was done. Edward had pushed her into a ton of glass plates and things and she was cut up pretty badly on her arms." I didn't know what to say, so I just let her continue. "We all had to leave the room, except for Carlisle who sewed her up.

"It was Edward's greatest fear come to life, yet again. But this time, the family was the only ones to blame; he couldn't deal with that and decided we weren't safe for Bella to be around anymore. He thought we were keeping her from her human life and that she needed a clean break from us; so we left and a few days later, he did too."

_Oh my god. How could he just leave her?_

I looked down; I was moments away from crying.

"There's more, and I really don't see why you shouldn't know it at this point. Your dad lied to her when we left. He was hoping to give her closure and help her move on faster, but he did it harshly. He told her he didn't want her anymore and she assumed he didn't love her either."

_Oh. My, God._ Now I was crying.

"Your letter? That's why you called him a 'dumbass.'"

She let out a quick laugh. "Yeah, I've spent the last twenty years making his life harder for your mom, because of what he did. But you got to know, he searched for her too; for fourteen years. He just realized the mistake too late."

Alice pulled me to her side as I cried. I couldn't believe it. They were meant for each other; they loved each other so deeply and they screwed it up. They let outside circumstances come in between them. He gave up on her and she let him go. Their story makes Romero and Juliet look like a calm, soothing comedy.

"Renesmee." That's all she could say. She had laid everything else on the table.

I had to ask. "Do you think they still love each other?"

"Yes." Her answer was immediate; no hesitation once so ever. "Your dad waited nearly eighty years to find someone like Bella. He never loved anyone before her and he will never love anyone else. As for your mom, she still loves him; more than she knows. She's just having a hard time. She hasn't thought of him as anything but your dad in so long that she has no idea what to do. She's spent twenty years thinking he didn't love her back and she found a way to cope with that; so now she's confused. But Renesmee, they are soul mates; each other's true love, they're meant to be together."

I nodded into her shoulder. I wanted them together. Mom deserved to be happy and loved; and so did he. They just need to get over their issues.

But I'm impatient. "Aunt Alice, we need to get them together."

She looked at me; shock written on her face. "Excuse me?"

I stood up and looked her in her eyes. "We are going to get my Mom and Dad back together. Mom doesn't call me 'mini-Alice' just because I love to shop. I also meddle. A lot. And mostly in her life."

She looked at me with huge eyes; shock written on her face. "She usually knows what's best for me, but she has no idea what's best for her. And what's best for her is being with Dad. She'll thank us for it."

It took a moment for Alice to respond. "Um, I agree. She needs to be with Edward; they both need each other more than they realize, but I can do it on my own Nes. You don't need to get involved."

_Does she really think she can make me sit out? Ha!_ "Aunt Alice; you need my help. I can manipulate her, trust me." She quirked an eyebrow. I laughed. "I can't believe you haven't figured it out yet…" I laughed again.

"Figured what out, Renesmee?" She pulled me back to the ottoman so we were eye level.

_Really, she didn't see it. _"The credit card." I answered simply.

She squinted at me; like she was trying to decipher the meaning of my statement. "Bella never used the credit card. No one did; ever."

"Nope, no one ever did." I laughed, but Aunt Alice didn't seem to find the humor so I quickly continued. "Aunt Alice, you put the card in Bella's name." She nodded. "All of her personal information was linked to that card." She nodded again. "It wasn't hard to call the company and pretend to be her. I got the billing address." I stated proudly.

"Okay, but that account is linked to a neutral address in New York…" She shook her head trying to figure out where I was going with this.

"Yep, but you have all of your mail sorted there and then sent to wherever you're living at the time. I called and explained that you owed twenty two thousand dollars to a collection agency and that you had given us a bogus number and address. They told me the four most recent forwarding addresses." I laughed. The guy that I had called totally freaked out and made me promise not to call again.

"I'm guessing you had already seen you were going to go to Ohio and made the forwarding change. I made Mom move here on really short notice. I knew we'd find you eventually, although I thought it might take a few tries. I got nervous when you didn't show up for the first few weeks. It was easy actually." I smiled at Aunt Alice, who looked like she was having an aneurysm.

"You tracked us… using human methods. I never thought we'd have to worry about that…" She stated quietly, and mostly to herself.

"You cannot tell Mom; she has no clue. But I wanted to meet and be with you all. Now, come on, are you going to help me or not?"

Aunt Alice looked at me again, closing her gaping mouth. "I'm in. What do you have in mind?"

I smiled before I jumped up and down into her arms. "I have a few ideas, but they won't get the job done. I'm still searching for inspiration."

"Well, we can get pretty much the entire family to help us. They all want Bella and Edward to get back together."

I pulled off the pair of jeans I had been wearing for the entire conversation and continued to try more clothes on. Alice continued as well.

***

**BPOV (Setting: All the girls are leaving the mall)**

I held twenty three bags in my arms. We were thankfully some of the last remaining customers left in the parking lot. I didn't want to draw any more attention to us.

Even the two associates that helped us in the last store had vacated the premises. Only the overnight staff was left in our area.

"Alice, do you think all of this will fit in the trunk?" I pushed the bags in as far as they would go and they still stuck out by about a foot.

"Of course! Come on Bella, use the vamp strength." I shook my head and both Rose and I crammed the bags in as Alice lowered the trunk hood.

We all climbed into the car. I laughed as Renesmee rested her head on my shoulder. "I warned you." I whispered.

She giggled. "It was fun," she sighed.

Alice put the key into the ignition. I expected the car to purr to life, but instead we heard a click. "What the hell? My car…" Alice whined. She repeated her actions three times before she gave up.

"Let me see if I can fix it, Alice." Rosalie opened her door but Alice just pulled her back in.

"No." We all looked at her; silently questioning her sanity. "I mean… its dark. I don't want to risk it getting worse or something. We'll just call the guys to pick us up."

"You want to leave your precious car; overnight; all alone in the mall parking lot?" Rosalie was waiting for the punch line. I hadn't realized she was so attached to the car. Renesmee yawned again.

"It'll be fine and we can come tomorrow before they open so nothing happens to it. Besides, Nes is tired. Let's just get her home." Alice smiled sweetly at Rose, but she looked like she was up to something. _And what is with the nick name for my daughter? What's wrong with 'Renesmee?'_

"Fine." Rose stated as Alice texted Jasper.

"They'll be here in ten minutes. That's when they disappear…" She sighed and we all waited. Renesmee nestled her way onto my lap and closed her eyes.

After about fifteen minutes, we saw _two_ cars. Rosalie's new model of her old BMW, I'm guessing she wasn't ready to let it go, and a Mercedes. As they pulled up, I saw Jasper and Edward riding in the Mercedes and Emmett sitting in the BMW. I also noticed that the BMW only had two seats. _This is suspicious…_

I glared at Alice, waiting for her plan to unfold. "Rose, you ride with Emmett and the rest of us can pile into the Mercedes. Oh, and I'm driving!" Before I could even lift Renesmee's sleeping form out of the car both Rose and Em were gone and Alice and Jasper had claimed the two front seats. _How convenient…_

I woke Renesmee enough so she could squeeze into the seat next to Edward, and me next to her. She yawned and tucked herself right into Edward. It was kind of cute. _Damn._

As the ride went on, Renesmee stretched. It wasn't long before she was being supported by Edward so she was lying up against his chest with her legs hung over my lap. I looked at her face, she was completely out.

As the ride went on, I started to waiver over the conclusion that it was all a set up. Nobody talked and seemed to just be eager to get home. My defenses must have been down.

"Thank you," I mouthed the words to Edward.

"For what?" He smiled brushing some hair out of Renesmee's face.

"For being a fantastic father to her. I always knew you would be; I'm just sorry it took so long for me to actually witness it." I smiled at the sight of them.

"You're a pretty incredible mother yourself."

I laughed and mouthed, "sure."

"Don't. Bella, you have made our daughter into the most amazing person. She's caring and loving, and strong. She's fearless and wonderful. She knows exactly who she is; she's comfortable in her skin and knows people intuitively. She's… she's so much like you."

I would have blushed if I could at that moment. I turned my head and caught Jasper's eyes in the rearview mirror. "Are you doing this?" I hissed.

He held both hands up in front of him in surrender. "No, this is all you two." He looked back out the windshield pretending he hadn't heard a thing.

I took a breath. "Thank you, Edward." I tried to convey all of the emotions I felt towards him in that moment; appreciation, gratitude, and forgiveness. It didn't fix_ us_, but we could at least be friends.

**A/N: Aww, some Edward and Bella fluff to hold you over…**

**Okay, I am nowhere near packed and I move Saturday, but I needed to write this chapter because it was just floating around in my head. I hadn't even realized Renesmee set this all up, hehe. Crazy girl!**

**Anyways, thanks to all of those who review both stories. You should check out DementedEvilPixie's stories. They're crazy awesome and add the comic relief that comes too rarely from my story.**

**I have some good news. I changed my plot… a 'happy ending' is coming sooner than I originally planned. It probably still won't happen as quickly as you want it, but it will happen. Please stop asking when; I don't have a definite answer. Once all is 'happy', I'll post an extra in the outtakes of what I planned originally. I still love that story line, but it didn't fit quite at well into my timeline. **

**As always, Read, Review, Comment!**

**~ kmwhyte**


	25. Happy Birthday

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or the songs I make reference to. If I did own Twilight, this story would be sold in stores everywhere with less grammar/spelling mistakes and I'd be rich… Damn :(**

**EPOV (Edward)**

"No," Bella said it simply, without emotion; to her it was simply a fact.

I paused, thinking of another alternative. "Okay, what about a car?"

"No." She continued to clean her kitchen at human pace. She had already washed the dishes and put them all away, now she was filling the sink to mop the floor. She was barely focused on the conversation at hand.

"What about college; I could pay for her tuition and all that college entails; books, board, food, entertainment…" I didn't want to add too much to the list; that wouldn't help my situation.

Bella turned off the sink and retrieved the yellow mop from her pantry calmly. "That is not a birthday gift, Edward."

_Does that mean I can pay for Renesmee's college someday?_ I'll explore that option later.

"How about a trip; maybe Europe, or Isle Esme?" I knew Renesmee wanted to see another beach and this is one where none of us had to hide.

She paused for the briefest second, probably at the mention of Isle Esme, but she recovered and turned to stare into my eyes. I got lost for a second before she spoke again. "No, think of something more realistic."

"A new computer?" Theirs was nearly seven years old and they weren't the first ones to own it.

"No!" Her annoyance was evident with her tone; I had pushed her too far. "Edward, she's twenty; she does not need to be spoiled with expensive, material things. I know you want to get her something special, but think of something else! You can get her something, but it will mean more if the gift isn't just something pretty, or expensive. She would rather spend the day with you than getting no-limit credit card."

She had a point; I suppose that suggestion was a bit rash. However, I intended to spend time with Renesmee on her birthday; and any other time that I could. Alice was already planning a family birthday party that night, but I still wanted to get her something she could unwrap.

"Alright, I get it, Bella; I really do, but… I want to get her _something_." She sighed while she dipped the mop into the sink to begin her cleaning. "What about a cell phone? It's a gift for you and I as much as her; we can get a hold her whenever she's not with us and if there's an emergency, she can get a hold of us, too."

I was running out of ideas. It's not like a CD or book would do. I had missed nineteen years of birthdays and other holidays; I wanted to make it up now.

Bella turned and glared in my direction, but didn't meet my eyes. "Fine, but… you better not get the most ridiculous one on the market. All she needs is to make phone calls and maybe text; that's it."

I nodded.

_She would also need to check her e-mail and access the internet. She would probably want to download music or TV shows too…_

_***_

**BPOV (Bella)**

The entire house was spotless. I had washed the floors, vacuumed, dusted, and scrubbed every surface in the house.

I was still stewing about giving in to Edward, but I had to admit… the cell phone was a smart idea. Out of all his options, it was the best alternative. _It was worlds more reasonable than his ideas about getting her a car or a new house. _

The only problem was that I still had no idea what I was going to get Renesmee for her birthday. We always did small things for our birthdays, but now with Edward and the Cullens, those days were gone.

For my birthday, Renesmee had given me a homemade scrapbook with pictures of us from the past twenty years. Last year, I had given her Florida 'snow globe.' I promised that we would go back there one day to see the beaches again. The year before that, I had given her a refurbished iPod; and she was grateful.

We didn't flaunt money and rarely used it to buy things for ourselves, or each other, except when it came to what was needed.

I looked at the calendar by the use-less refrigerator; two days. I had two days to find a gift worthy of the "Cullen competition."

I heard Renesmee open the front door and head my way. "Hi honey!" I called.

"Hey Mom, what you doing?"

"Just thinking; did you have fun with Alice?" I couldn't believe how often they were shopping. It had been two weeks since our first shopping trip and they had already been on five more on their own; Rose and I refused to accompany them until they became more reasonable about their shopping habits; i.e. the amount of time and money spent in each store and the number of stores visited in a trip.

"Yeah, we had fun. She got me some clothes for my birthday…"

"Yeah?" I bit my tongue not to ask how much she brought. I had already tried to rein in Alice, but anytime I attempted to argue my side she played the Angela card; or the credit card-card.

"Yup." Renesmee started to turn to head to her bedroom.

"Well, what do you want for your birthday, hun?" I usually didn't ask, but I was running short on time.

She halted her movements and slowly turned, which immediately made me tense. "I don't know if I want anything, but there's something I want to do…" She seemed nervous about asking me, which in turn made me nervous.

"Well, what is it, sweetie?" I smiled, letting her know we could do almost anything if she wanted to. She smiled sweetly in return; almost too sweetly. It must be something I'm not going to want to do. "Just say it, Renesmee." I laughed, trying to ease her nervousness; and hoping that she would just spit it out.

Renesmee giggled slightly before taking a deep breath. "I want us _all_ to go to… formal?" It came out as a question; she knew how much I hated dances, but she didn't know I had actually attended one before… with her father. And I was not going to reveal that little fact.

"Really?" I attempted to not sound unhappy, but it was difficult. I hated dancing, always had.

"Yeah," she said hesitantly. That's when I focused on her statement. Beyond the announcement of the formal, she had said 'all;' which I could only conceive to mean that the entire family would go; myself, Renesmee, Edward, Alice, Jasper, Rosalie, and Emmett.

_Oh my._

"All of us?" I asked.

"Well, yeah. I think it would be really nice for everyone to be together. And, David asked me to go…"

David.

He was a junior in our gym class and he blatantly stared at _my little girl_ nearly every day.

The vampire within was impending death to the boy who was pursuing my daughter, but my common sense was explaining the consequences of those actions. _Maybe Edward can listen to his mind a bit…_

"Mom?" I looked to her again, momentarily distracted from plans for the _high school boy_ who had asked out my daughter.

"What did you say?"

"I told him that I would check to make sure I could and let him know. I _really_ want to go. Mom; I like him. And I think it would be fun for everyone to go together. _Please?_" The pout was fully in place.

I fought it with everything I had, but I was sorely lacking in the resistance department. It was what she wanted for her birthday. And I had to admit that with the entire family there looking after her, especially Edward, Emmett, and Jasper; she would be protected if the _boy_ tried anything. Unfortunately for him, he would not be so protected.

"Okay, we'll go, but that's not a birthday present, Renesmee. The dance doesn't even fall on your birthday; it's nearly a month after."

She smiled brightly. "But that's what I want. I want the entire family to go and for us all to look amazing and have a wonderful time."

"That's not a gift." I wanted to give her something that was from me. If everyone went, it was a gift from everyone, not just me.

"Well, how about you convince everyone to go." She mumbled. "And I pick out your outfit…"

_Oh, I'm going to regret this…_

"Okay; happy birthday." I sighed, completely defeated. Renesmee squealed and threw her arms around me in a hug.

***

**Two days later, Renesmee's Birthday Party. (Still BPOV)**

Renesmee and I were headed over to the Cullens' for Renesmee's party. She was bouncing in the passenger seat and I had given up trying to calm her down. She wasn't excited about the food or the gifts, or even them fawning all over her. She was just excited to spend time with all of them again.

She had spent many shopping trips with Alice and saw Edward and Jasper everyday in classes. On top of that, we all 'had lunch' together at school. She also went over to their house at least a few times a week to visit with Esme and Carlisle.

I hadn't gone over since my last talk with Edward, but some of them had come to see me.

But she was overjoyed to spend the entire evening with everyone all together.

I, on the other hand, was nervous.

I know it's stupid, but there it is. I was nervous because everyone, including Carlisle and Esme, knew that Edward and I weren't together; and that there were no plans of that status changing. I was nervous because I had seen Alice with her scheming face on whenever she looked to me or Edward. I was nervous because Renesmee was having a birthday party, with the Cullens, and I distinctly remember my last birthday with them. I was also nervous at the various, and very extravagant, gifts she was sure to receive from everyone. _At least I was able to tame Edward's gift a bit…_

We pulled up to their _estate_ and were immediately greeted with Fuchsia and brown streamers surrounding their wraparound porch and nearly every surrounding tree. There were foil stars covering the windows and door.

I could only imagine the inside. _Alice._

Like she heard me call her, Alice appeared at the front door wearing a rather large smile, especially for my daughter and suddenly, I didn't care. _Spoil her, go ahead. _

Renesmee jumped from the car and ran inside with Alice. I, instead, walked casually to the front door to see Emmett waiting for me. "Bringing back memories?" he laughed.

"Kind of." I fell into the bear of a hug he was giving and just willed myself to relax.

Just like so many years ago, I saw the extravagance that they could go to for a simple occasion. There were more stars hanging from the ceiling and lying on every surface that was not covered in various wildflowers, which were Renesmee's favorite. Now upon, closer inspection, I realized the stars weren't foil, they were metal… but not just any metal, no, they appeared to be silver, possibly white gold. I banished the thought and continued to appraise Alice's work. She had gotten a large double decker cookie cake, with minimal frosting. There were also streamers draped over all of the banisters, one of which appeared to be brand new, and mantels.

There was an iPod playing music in the background and I recognized a song from Renesmee's playlist; although I didn't know the title or band that was playing it. Fuchsia Christmas lights were piled in clear vases and bowls, creating interesting lighting effects.

I did notice, however, that there were paper plates instead of glass. Even the vases and bowls appeared to be plastic. I laughed at the irony. I may be impenetrable to shards of glass, as is Renesmee, but the thought struck me as hilarious and… meaningful.

Emmett nudged me out of my reverie, "what's so funny?"

"Nothing." I simply shook my head as I greeted the rest of the Cullens.

"Okay," Alice began. "It's present time for my lovely niece. You already know what I got you, but here it is anyway." She handed Renesmee a gigantic box; nearly as tall as Emmett, and nearly as wide around.

"It's clothes, can we skip to something more interesting?" I thought Emmett would be slaughtered at that very moment from the look he was receiving from Alice. Both Rosalie and I stepped in front of him, providing a horrible excuse of coverage from her wrath.

"Don't ruin my fun, Emmett, or I'll ruin yours." Alice glared, while Emmett just nodded and continued to laugh and make comments to both Rose and me.

After what felt like an hour, Renesmee was handed her next gift from Jasper. "It's from me and Em."

Renesmee giggled as she slid the sadly tied ribbon from the golden box. It wasn't large, but actually pretty small, for which I was grateful, but then again, that didn't mean much. There could have been a platinum credit card in there, or thousand dollar necklace.

She flipped the top to where only the contents were known to her and the givers. "Oh my god, you're kidding! I wanted to go to this one so bad." She threw her arms around Jasper and kissed his cheek. He smiled as she ran around me to hug Emmett as well.

"What is it, hun?" I finally asked.

"Concert tickets… to U2 and Muse!" She was jumping up and down as she shoved the tickets in my face.

"It's this weekend, and it's just you, me, and Jazz. Some uncles and niece bonding time." Emmett declared proudly.

I wrapped my arm around Jasper, as he had made himself closer to me. He leaned in, to whisper in my ear, "We'll protect her from all the lowlifes."

"I know," I squeezed him around the waist showing my gratitude.

"Okay, Grandpa and I next." Everyone laughed as Esme presented Renesmee with her and Carlisle's gift. The box was larger than Jasper and Emmett's, looking to be the size of a briefcase, and more properly wrapped. The butterflies racked my stomach and Jasper sent me calming waves.

As she opened the wrapping, Renesmee's lips curled into a smile. She knew what she was getting; that much was obvious. As she pulled the paper away, I saw the emblem I had been fearing; Dell. A new computer; something I distinctly told Edward, he was _not _allowed to get her. But this was from Esme and Carlisle… I looked to Edward who was fighting a smile, but refusing to meet my eyes. I shook my head while releasing a warning growl; just for his ears.

_Way to get around the rules, Edward._

"This is perfect, thank you!" Renesmee hugged both Carlisle and Esme tightly and kissed both of their cheeks. "Mom, it's great, right?" Everyone looked to me, no doubt waiting for the shit to hit the fan. They all had heard the growl, except Renesmee, but chose to ignore it.

I rolled my eyes and produced the smile I knew Renesmee wanted. "Yes, it is honey. It's very generous." Everyone relaxed, as well as myself, thanks to Jazz.

"Here's a gift from me." Rosalie handed her a greenish, bluish box. I instantly recognized the color, and only because of Alice's shopping habits; even this store was out of Renesmee's preferences. It was from _Tiffany's_.

I took in a deep breath willing myself to calm.

_They're not doing anything wrong. Each of them has only gotten her one gift. It isn't outrageous. They've missed her previous 19 birthdays and Christmases; this _is_ okay._ I repeated the statements over and over within my mind, willing myself to believe wholeheartedly, instead of only half, as I was now.

Renesmee gasped when she saw the jewelry, which immediately caused me to tense. _I trusted Rose; please don't be a million dollar diamond necklace… please…_

I opened my eyes, not even realizing that they had closed, and saw Renesmee had turned to box for everyone to see. It was a silver charm bracelet with three stars dangling off of it. Two of the stars were carved from some sort of gemstone, while the third was molded from silver. It certainly was fancier than the leather bound charm bracelet I had given her, but it was completely Renesmee; it was beautiful.

Renesmee looked to me in approval, clearly hoping that she had it, since her smile was a mile wide. "That's incredibly beautiful, Rosalie. I _know_ she loves it." Renesmee smiled at me as she hugged Rose and then insisting that she help her put it on.

"Alright, I guess your Dad gets the honor of going last, huh?" Edward joked as he handed a medium sized box to her. It looked to be the size of a cell phone box so I calmed down without Jasper's help, which I'm sure, he appreciated.

I wasn't even aware Renesmee had opened the gift until I saw her jumping up and down in small circles. "You got me an iPhone! Oh, thanks Dad!"

_He what?!_ I glared into Edward's retreating figure. _Where the hell does he think he's going? _Jasper lost his grip on me and I chased after Edward's form heading through the kitchen entryway. "I said a basic phone, Edward," I hissed, trying not to catch Renesmee's attention. Thankfully, between the phone and the family, she was completely distracted.

"No, you said not to get her the 'most ridiculous one on the market,' and this isn't. It's a newer model of a phone that came out years ago. There are many other phones that do more ridiculous functions that I immediately crossed out per your instructions."

_Oh, the tone is so not helping you…_

"Don't talk to me like that." I growled.

He sighed. "I'm sorry; I didn't mean to talk down to you. But… look how happy she is. I know she'd be happy with any old phone; although possibly not now since she has this one. But just look; _I_ did that. _I_ made her that happy. That's all I wanted to do."

_Damnit._

I didn't want to relent, but what choice did I have? How the hell can I really argue with that? Oh, right… I can't.

"Okay, just… don't blindside me like that, okay?" He nodded his head, smiling that damn crooked smile. It made me want to melt.

"So what did you get her?" He asked, while leaning up against the kitchen counter.

I took a seat on the closest bar stool, getting comfortable for the conversation; such a human and unnecessary thing to do. "I didn't really get her something, rather I promised her something."

"Which was?" He looked at me hopefully.

"She wants to go to the formal next month. And she wants us all to go with her." He nodded, smiling widely. "I swear if you laugh…" He knew how much I didn't want to go; past experiences should make that obvious.

"Sorry, I won't laugh," he mumbled as he bit his lip. "You really agreed to that?"

I rolled my eyes at his failed attempt to convey a calm, neutral stance on the subject. "Unfortunately, she's never been to a dance and she wants to go. And I want to make her happy." He nodded at the sentiment.

"Well, I believe that all can be arranged; Alice will be thrilled." He smiled that damn smile again.

"Yeah, probably." I sighed, dreading what I had to do next. "I need a favor…" He looked up expectantly. "I need you to listen in on David Sander's thoughts for me; about Renesmee."

His eyes darkened a few shades. "Why?" His voice was menacing; good.

"He asked Renesmee to the dance and I want to make sure I don't need to kill him prior to then."

"Excuse me? He did what?" The rage was evident as he gripped the granite counter top; creating dust in the wake of former stone.

"Esme will be pissed," I muttered, pointing to his hands. He instantly stopped and brushed away the powder he had created. "Look, I don't like it any more than you do. And I know this is all new to you, but we can't cage her up."

"Why not?" I laughed at his serious response.

"Because she's good at sneaking out." He gaped at me. "No, seriously, she's twenty years old and has had a boyfriend or two; boyfriends which I scared silly. They were never problem though and it's good for her to have someone to be around that isn't family. Someone that she can just be with. Remember, I'm playing a sister here, you're not even family in our little back story; just do the research, I'll take of it." He looked to me, completely dejected. "I'm sorry," I whispered. "Next time it will be different, but this time… that's how it has to be."

I left the kitchen to return to the party. It took several seconds for the words to click in my brain. _Did I just say 'next time?'_

**A/N: Okay, if I ever made it sound like Renesmee was already 20, I'm sorry, but now she is. Got it? Good. **

**I hope you all like where the story is going and maybe you can guess as to what is developing here. Or maybe not, I'm trying hard not to give anything away so I may just be confusing you. :)**

**In case you haven't seen the "Extras and Outtakes" for this story, check them out. I have added two mini-chapters. One is between Rose and Edward/Emmett and the other is between Edward and Carlisle. There will be more coming to that "story" soon.**

**Also, I want to thank everyone for reading and reviewing. I cannot tell you how happy I am to have nearly 1100 reviews. I have officially been shocked to the point where I'm speechless. You all rock and I hope you all continue to review and let me know what you think about the story. I hope to not wait so long to update again, it was just a very crazy week.**

**I also want to thank everyone who wished me good luck on my job and my move. I am moved in to my apartment now (it's wonderful). I am not-so-patiently waiting for my job to start, it should be any day now, but who knows… I'm waiting for the other person who I'm taking over for to go on maternity leave and she's being stubborn.**

**As always, Read, Review, Comment!**

**~ kmwhyte**


	26. Whatcha Say

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or the songs I make reference to. If I did own Twilight, this story would be sold in stores everywhere with less grammar/spelling mistakes and I'd be rich… Damn :(**

_So no I know I should of treated you better  
But me and you were meant to last forever_

_So let me in, give me another chance  
To really be your man  
Cause when the roof caved in and the truth came out  
I just didn´t know what to do  
But when I become a star we´ll be living so large_

_Mmmm whatcha say  
Ooh that you only meant well?  
Well of course you did  
Mmmm whatcha say  
Mmmm that it´s all for the best?  
Because it is  
Mmmm whatcha say  
Ooh that you only meant well?  
Well of course you did  
Mmmm whatcha say  
Whatcha say  
wha- wha- wha- wha- what did you say?_

_How could I live with myself  
Knowing that I let our love go  
And ooh when I do with one chance  
I just gotta let you know  
I know what I did wasn´t clever  
But me and you we´re meant to be together_

Whatcha Say by Jason Derulo

**A/N: This song is perfect for both Edward and Bella. The chorus is Bella's POV and the verses belong to Edward. **

**I want to apologize that this chapter is so late. If you want to know why, here's the excuse (if you don't, then skip to the next paragraph): I ended up getting a permanent job at the same school, in the same grade and started Monday (the 2****nd****). I ended up being bombarded with lessons, grades, papers, classroom designs, etc. Let's just say I was severely overwhelmed. But I have gotten to a point where I can update.**

**I have written another chapter since the last update, but it won't happen for a while… I had a great idea and had to write it down, it will probably come here in about three chapters or so… after the reunion :)**

**Thank you to all of you that has commented, reviewed, and added me or my story to your favorites. I love you all!!! You're the reason I try to update often, I promise I'll try to be better!**

**Shout outs: DementedEvilPixie, EmeraldStar73, and Content1! I love these girls and their stories. I'm so behind on reading their stories right now, but I fully intend to catch up soon when I have more time. Show some love and read their stories!!! They're awesome :)**

**Read, Review, and Comment/Question if you have them!**

**~kmwhyte**

**EPOV (Edward)**

It had been five hours, twenty three minutes, and eighteen seconds of complete shopping torture.

We had all been forced to go shopping for our formal attire together; all seven of us.

Now, as much as I love spending time with my daughter, and Bella, this was not my idea of the way to do that. I swear this is some sort of punishment; concocted by my annoyingly hyper pixie sister. She's scheming… but I'm not sure to what point…

Her thoughts were completely focused on the wardrobe selection. Jasper, Emmett, and I would be dressed to the nines in Armani. That was the easy part; the girls on the other hand… That was a whole other story. I was not envious of them.

I knew that Renesmee was enjoying herself. Not only had Bella allowed our daughter to pick out her outfit, but Rose had also eagerly agreed to the idea. Unfortunately for her, now she was regretting that promise.

Rosalie and Bella had become very close over the past few weeks; not best friends, but definitely allies. This was not a comfort to me since Rosalie was barely speaking to me and would glare anytime I entered a room. I had the feeling that she was starting to influence Bella in avoiding me.

_Just my luck…_

During Renesmee birthday, Bella had softened. Not to the extent that I would have liked, but still we were working on becoming friends. It was at least a direction that I favored.

Rose and Bella came out in their forty-third dress selection, each. Renesmee and Alice sat on a round couch in front of several mirrors in deep thought as they appraised both of the selections.

After several minutes, Renesmee spoke up. "I don't think so… it's not right…" she confessed, clearly enjoying the power.

"Nope, not right." Alice agreed, smiling proudly at Renesmee.

Bella turned to return to the dressing room in a huff, but Renesmee spoke again. "Mom, can you take in that rack with you, I bet one of those will work." Bella gawked at Renesmee, but she had already turned to talk to Alice about what worked and what was downright unfashionable.

"I bet I'm going to ground her after all of this…" Bella seethed as she pulled the rack containing probably fifty dresses behind her.

Jasper, Emmett, and I were lined against the wall directly behind Renesmee and Alice, barely understanding why we were being forced to stay for the girls' fittings.

We had been talking all morning, but at this point we were shunned into silence. Alice had had enough of our comments and I quote, "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all… and if you do, expect to feel my wrath." Emmett was up for the challenge, until he saw Renesmee shake her head in agreement with her dictating aunt.

Emmett had come to fear Renesmee. He hadn't revealed why, but it was obvious that something had happened during the concert that made him more than a little fearful.

So, here we stood, quiet and still as statues.

"I'm going to ground her for eternity; she is driving me up the damn wall…" Bella hissed from the fitting room. Alice and Renesmee were too involved in their conversation to hear, but the boys were all ears.

"I never thought anyone would be worse to shop with more than Alice, but your daughter? Good God, I was wrong." Rosalie growled.

"I swear if I hadn't agreed to this, I would be running right now. I knew I'd regret this."

"Then why did you agree; you at least knew what you were getting into, I didn't." Rosalie pouted while Emmett began shaking with laughter next to me. _"She has no idea what our precious niece is capable of, this is only the beginning."_

"Ugh, I don't know… I should've said no, but this was all she wanted. I don't know, I suppose it could be worse, but I am losing my temper here." She had calmed some, but calm or not, I was beginning to fear for my daughter if she didn't agree on a dress in the next twenty minutes.

"What could be worse than this?"

"… Um…" she paused and her voiced lowered significantly. The silence forced me to listen to Rosalie's thoughts to hear her response. "It's a formal dance, Rosalie… and everyone will have a date, including Renesmee, except for Edward and myself. I didn't want her getting any ideas. This, at least, distracts her."

_Wow, she really didn't want us being together._ I looked to Jasper and Emmett, who were both silently counting the seconds until we would be released.

"Bella, do you really not want to be with Edward anymore… honestly?" Rose wasn't as quiet and both Jasper and Emmett looked to watch my face; either I'd be overjoyed or completely devastated. They were still sure of the love that we had shared, but they doubted Bella's ability to be honest with Rosalie about the topic.

Bella was silent, so I decided to tune into Rose's mind once again; a habit I loathed that was forming. Bella had just slipped a beautiful blue one shoulder dress on that flowed down her form to the floor. She appeared to be floating; she was a goddess. She smoothed her hands down the material, taking a good look at herself before shaking her head 'no.'

"I kind of figured that; you're not that good of an actress, Bella. Why are you being so stubborn? Just go with him to the dance." Rosalie said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world; she was bored of the topic.

I held my breath waiting for her response, for her reasoning. _I would dance with her forever, if she'd let me. Preferably in that dress._

"Because… I'm terrified, Rose. It's not just me anymore." She sighed, turning back to Rosalie.

"Renesmee is a big girl, Bella. You need to go after what you want; come on, he'll never leave you."

"He did once." She turned to face the mirror again, looking into her tearful eyes. I knew the tears would never fall, as did she, but it was heartbreaking to know that I caused them. "I can't help it; I just feel like he'll do it again if something goes wrong." Rosalie walked the two steps over to Bella and pulled her into a hug. I was as shocked as Bella.

From Rosalie's thoughts, it hadn't been the first hug, but apparently it was more sincere and genuine. It wasn't her thanking Bella, or being grateful to Bella; no, it was her comforting Bella. She wanted her to trust; to trust herself; her own feelings. She wanted Bella to be happy and to feel wanted, just as Rosalie always wanted.

Rosalie was near sobs at that moment. She was actually very choked up. Bella had everything Rose had wanted; a child, a man to love, and a family; but her life wasn't perfect. She kept me at arm's length, never letting herself be vulnerable with me, and felt out of place in the family. Rosalie couldn't take it; she felt for Bella.

"You deserve to be happy, Bella. And you'd be happy if you just let yourself be with him." Rosalie whispered in Bella's ear and then abruptly left the embrace and came out for Alice and Renesmee's criticism.

"I like it, it's perfect." Alice gushed as she walked around Rose twice, looking appraisingly at her sister.

"I love the cut, but maybe the color is… I don't know, I'm not convinced." Alice nodded at Renesmee's opinion and ran out of the room to speak to the sales woman that had the good sense to hide from this area for the last two and a half hours.

Bella came out in the beautiful blue dress Rosalie had unknowingly shown me in her mind. She looked gorgeous, and I ached to tell her so. She slumped against the wall, holding her left arm across her stomach, waiting for Renesmee to speak her mind. It was obvious she expected to return to the dressing room to try on yet another dress.

"_Oh my god, she's so pretty. Oh, it's prefect; it looks similar, but even more elegant. Mom looks stunning." _Renesmee thought; her smile growing ever so slightly so not to reveal her decision. _"What do you think, Dad?_"

I looked at her in question. _"Oh come on, does she look beautiful or not?"_ I looked to the ceiling and then down again; adopting my visual cues that Alice and I had used so often to communicate. _"I thought as much."_

"That's the one, Mom. Go change, and now shoes!" Renesmee squealed at the last two words; not letting Bella know how much she liked the dress.

_Both she and Alice are scheming… hmmm._ I decided it was in my best interest to stay out of it until I had more facts, so I let the thought drift away.

***

Seven hours, fourteen minutes, and eleven seconds.

The time was stretching on and the weariness of the group was ever-increasing. If it had just been Alice, this day would have ended hours ago, but no one wanted to disappoint Renesmee.

The shoes were purchased. I hadn't imagined all the possible options. I was actually feeling relief for Bella that she would not be feeling the pain of her stiletto heels during the formal.

Alice insisted that Jasper, Emmett, and Rosalie were needed to help finalize the remaining arrangements for the formal.

"Me? Why?" Emmett whined, clearly his resistance was futile, but his petulance was ever present.

"Uncle Emmett, I wish you would stop complaining. It's close to being over, but only if you stop distracting us from the task at hand." Renesmee looked into Emmett's eyes while holding a hand to his cheek. His eyes grew large at what she showed him. Apparently, she had dirt that she was holding over his head until the formal was over. She didn't reveal the evidence; knowing full well that I was watching. But she lightly smacked his cheek after the images had passed. "Thank you, Uncle Em." She smiled sweetly, looking all too innocent. I couldn't fight my smile.

Emmett walked behind Alice in the opposite direction with Rosalie and Jasper both walking behind him, asking "what the hell that was all about." He only shook his head while still staring at the floor.

I looked to Bella, as Renesmee giggled at the rest of the family heading off to arrange god knows what, and saw her concern. "Renesmee, what did you do your uncle?" she asked, sounding extremely motherly, while I fought another smile.

"Nothing," she smirked, but wouldn't meet our eyes. "Come on, I'm hungry; I saw some ice cream in the food court."

Bella and I followed Renesmee; before I had a chance to pull out my wallet; Bella gave Renesmee a folded twenty dollar bill. "Get us all something, honey."

Renesmee skipped off, looking completely innocent, calling back to us, "Get a table."

"She's an evil mastermind," I said to no one in particular.

"Tell me about it…" Bella agreed. She followed me as I found a round booth, half hidden by a short wall that served as the booth's back rest. No one was seated in the area, which would make it considerably easier to hide the fact that we would not be eating the ice cream.

I paused looking to see if Renesmee had ordered yet, but I couldn't see her. _Here's my chance, tell her… something. _"Bella, the dress she picked out looked lovely on you."

"Thank you, Edward." Her answer was dry, monotone. She was trying not to appear emotionally affected by my compliment. If she was still human, her blush or heartbeat would have given her away, I'm sure. But without them, I wouldn't have been so sure if not for the fact that she admitted to Rosalie that she still she wanted to be with me.

"Are you looking forward to the formal?" I asked, hoping to ease her into the conversation.

"Somewhat." She wasn't mean, but still cold. Hoping that I would remain quiet until Renesmee came back to join our table and undoubtedly occupy the conversation.

"Bella…" I couldn't say what I wanted to. _Bella, I want to be with you, more than anything and I know you want that too. I heard you! Please, give me another chance; I'll spend forever making it up to you, please? Just stop this hot and cold shit, please? Bella, be with me, now and forever. Go to formal with me, marry me, spend forever in my arms; I'll protect you from everything! _I could go on and on telling her how much I wanted her and how much she was frustrating me to no end with her avoidance and, then sudden, alliance.

"Oh for the love of god," she seethed as she rose from her seat. I looked up; ready to defend myself and speak my mind when I noticed it was not me that she was angry with. Over on the other side of the food court sat Renesmee, with David Sanders… _the _boy_ wanting to date my daughter._

They sat there laughing, eating their ice cream, completely oblivious to Bella and me staring; waiting for a reason to intervene. "What is he thinking?" Bella asked; no doubt hoping that it was propane so she could scare him out of his mind.

"_She's so beautiful when she smiles. I am so lucky she didn't have a date yet; every guy in school wanted to go with her. But she said yes to me… damn, I'm lucky. She's perfect." _He smiled as he swept a fallen curl from her forehead, tucking it behind her ear; much like I used to do with Bella. I looked to Bella, and she stared in confusion.

"Well…" she hissed.

"He thinks he's lucky to be with her; he thinks she's beautiful." I frowned at the statement; this was the second time we had spied on him, hoping that he would reveal ulterior motives that were worthy of physical harm; delivered from either of us.

"Damn," Bella breathed as she reclaimed her seat.

"Yeah." I agreed. How can you seek out revenge on the boy dating your daughter, when his intentions are pure? I was still searching for an answer; one that would hopefully come sooner than later.


	27. You're Not Sorry

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or the songs I make reference to. If I did own Twilight, this story would be sold in stores everywhere with less grammar/spelling mistakes and I'd be rich… Damn :(**

**BPOV (Bella)**

"_All this time I was wasting; hoping you would come around. I've been giving out chances every time and all you do is let me down. And it's taken me this long; baby but I figured you out. And you're thinking we'll be fine again, but not this time around. You don't have to call anymore; I won't pick up the phone. This is the last straw; don't wanna hurt anymore. And you can say that you're sorry, but I don't believe you, baby, like I did before; you're not sorry, no, no, no, no."_

The song was on its third rotation; it just seemed to pop back into the mix that Renesmee had selected for my cleaning streak before she insisted on heading over to see Alice prior to the torturous day of beautifying ourselves before the dance.

I wanted to shatter the damn speakers! The song was good; don't get me wrong. It was catchy and sung beautifully, but god damnit if it didn't make my silent heart want to shatter every time I heard it.

_"Looking so innocent; I might believe you if I didn't know. Could've loved you all my life if you hadn't left me waiting in the cold."_

_Yup, there it was._ That's the line that just seemed to bash me down each time I heard it.

The song was obviously about a man who broke a girl's heart; most likely by cheating on her or lying constantly. And I know that Edward never did cheat on me; or even would cheat on me, but the words still apply.

He looks too sweet and trustworthy _every_ time I see him; but two minutes later when I've escaped his beauty… I remember the words he said to me in the woods. I remember him saying he didn't want me and all I hear is 'I don't love you.'

It's irrational; I know. He didn't actually say that; not in words… but his eyes said it; very convincingly.

_"And you got your share of secrets and I'm tired of being last to know. And now you're asking me to listen 'cause it's worked each time before. But you don't have to call anymore; I won't pick up the phone. This is the last straw; don't wanna hurt anymore. And you can tell me that you're sorry, but I don't believe you, baby, like I did before. You're not sorry, no, no, oh; you're not sorry, no, no, oh."_

I know his secrets; hell I share his secrets.

I know he's sorry; that's not what this song represents for me; no it represents trust, or lack thereof. That's the real problem; _trust_.

_"You had me falling for you honey and it never would've gone away, no. You used to shine so bright, but I watched all of it fade. So you don't have to call anymore; I won't pick up the phone. This is the last straw; there's nothing left to beg for. And you can tell me that you're sorry, but I don't believe you, baby, like I did before. You're not sorry, no, no, oh; you're not sorry, no, no, oh."_

Every time I see him… his whole body screams for me to embrace. I want his arms around my back; holding me to his chest. I want his fingers playing with ends of my hair while my lips mold to his… but they won't; not anymore. We're both stone; cold stone.

I wanted this life; I _want_ this life, but there's always a part of me that regrets the fact that he wasn't there for the transition. He wasn't there to comfort me during the fire, or take me hunting. He wasn't there to hold me back from attacking anyone; although I did that on my own… I still wanted him there. He wasn't there to take care of me and as much as I complained about it; I wanted it more. I wanted him. I _want _him.

Damnit, I hate that song!

"Bella…"

I looked up; at some point I had slid down the wall, in the corner of the living room. I regained control of my body and hoisted myself up once my eyes landed on Jasper.

"Hey Jazz; what's up?" I attempted to play it off; pretending that I was just dusting under a table, but who am I kidding? I am Bella; world's worst actress trying to fool the only empath I know. That battle was already lost.

He stared at me for a minute; never attempting to speak or even break eye contact. I felt a slight pressure on my heart. "Stop, Jazz." I was breathless, and not because I was a vampire, but because he was amplifying my heartache. "Please?" It was a plea for him to stop, but he didn't.

Jasper walked a few steps over to my side and I collapsed into him. He, of course, caught me before I even tilted more than twenty degrees; no doubt falling on my ass if he hadn't been there. "You need this, Bella."

"No… I need… for you… to stop, please?" My emotions were heavy; resembling boulders striking me from all sides. I felt them ease a bit, but only barely.

"Talk through it, Bella. You know I feel it; might as well talk about it." He had a point. He knew exactly what I was feeling. What was the difference between him knowing that much and knowing all of it?

"It hurts."

"I know."

"It hurts so much, Jazz." He merely nodded that time; encouraging me to continue on to more descriptive explanations.

"I'm trying to figure it out; make… sense of it." _Like there was sense where Edward and I was concerned…_

"And what have to come up with so far?" I refused to answer that question. Truth was; I had no clue. I was stumped still trying to find out how I had ended up at this point. Me; with Edward's child, coming back into his life after twenty years; it was surreal.

Jasper attempted to crack through my wall again; adding more weight to my emotions. "What needs to be figured out, Bella? What questions are at the top of the list?"

I took a few steadying, yet unnecessary, breaths. "I need to figure out what I am to him and what he's to me. I need to figure out how this affects Renesmee and I need to figure out what I…" I couldn't continue. _That _statement was so ludicrous. It was easy to answer, which was why I made it difficult to state. If I couldn't say it, or think it, then I could deny it.

Unfortunately, for me, Jasper understood all too well. "You need to figure out what you want, right?" Although he formed it as a question, I knew he knew the answer. Hell, if I knew it, then the empath sure as hell did.

I nodded once, hoping for him to drop it. If he sensed my hope, he either misinterpreted it, or ignored it. "Bella, you know what you want; him. Just tell him; he'll never let you go."

"But he did once…" It came out in a whisper, barely audible to my own ears.

"He learned his lesson the hard way; trust me." Jasper's voice was fierce. "His conviction to be with you is strong, but you pushing him away is causing his hope to waiver. He's scared to death that he hurt you too much, Bella. But you're strong and you have already forgiven him; why can't you let yourself try?" The question was gentle, as if he really wanted to help. And with it being Jasper, I knew he did.

"Because I'm scared too, but not just for me." I was scared for Renesmee; what if she lost her Dad because of our relationship, or if I lost her? I couldn't lose her; she was the only other thing that held that amount of importance along with Edward.

"I wouldn't worry about your daughter too much; I think she can… take care of herself." He laughed, no doubt thinking of her standing up to several members of the family over the last few days concerning the dance. He had raced for a video camera when she had taken Alice on.

"I'm not worried about her getting hurt as much as Edward or me getting hurt because we hurt her… did that make sense?" My brain was jumbled from the emotions.

"You're afraid she'll choose one of you over the other if it ends badly." It wasn't a question, but I nodded anyways. "Give her some credit, Bella, Renesmee is capable of a lot of things and trust me… she forgives everyone… for everything. Is that all that worries you when it comes to you and Edward?"

"No, it's everything, Jazz." I leaned into his chest, tucking my head under his chin, seeking the brotherly embrace and advice. "I don't know how to go back…"

"What do you mean?"

I shrugged, not quite sure how to form my answer. "When we were together, I was human and fragile and naïve…"

"Yeah, we all remember that."

I smacked his chest and with my strength, he actually winced. "Let me finish; he was the dominant personality. He took charge of us; he took care of me because I needed him too. And while I need him still in that way… somehow; he needs to be with the present-me now, as well. And I don't know if he'll want that… I'm different, Jazz. I'm not the same Bella that I was twenty years ago… but he's the same Edward." It sounded stupid; I knew that the minute I uttered the explanation. It was pure crap. What it all came down to was that I was afraid that we weren't compatible anymore; that we just didn't belong together anymore. My sugarcoating was my attempt at deflecting that fear.

Jasper squeezed my shoulders and kissed the top of my head. "You may be an immortal mother now, but you're still Bella. Just… stronger; more independent, but that's because you had to be. Trust me when I say, Edward is even more in love with you now. His emotions go into overload when he sees you standing up for yourself or Renesmee. He nearly jumped you in the department store last weekend, you know? He's ready to just kiss you; he can't hold out much longer, Bella. You need to make a decision, and soon."

I nodded. I knew a decision was undeniable, but I was hoping to put it off for a few weeks, or months, or years. Whatever.

"Want to go for a hunt? Big dance tonight; lots of tempting humans; might as well take the edge off…" Jasper laughed to lighten the mood. How strange that I would find it a bit funny even without his laughter?

"Are you sure it's fair to take out my emotions on the poor, unsuspecting animals?" I laughed as we walked out the door.

"They'd die by the hands of one of our family members anyways… at least you'll make it quick with your frustration." I laughed as I smacked the side of his head.

We ran for a minute before I realized this whole afternoon was supposed to be me cleaning and stalling; completely avoiding Alice and Renesmee prior to the dance for as long as possible. "Hey Jazz, what brought you over?" _I smell a scheme_.

"Alice wanted me out of the house; Renesmee was driving everyone crazy and I might have had a _bit_ to do with that." I looked over at him with a raised eyebrow. "I just heighted her emotions a bit; made her feel out of control. She was ordering everyone around, barking orders and demands, even to Esme…" He laughed loudly then; truly enjoying messing with his niece to annoy his siblings. "Alice told me I'd be better off messing with your emotions, so here I am." I took off after him again before I lost myself in the hunt; Jasper following soon after.

***

After three hours and four deer, Jasper and I started heading back to his house.

I was "told" to be in Alice's bathroom by two thirty, and not a second later. Apparently since I was a vampire, I now was not allowed the excuse to be late.

I heaved a sigh as Jasper opened the door. I wasn't looking forward to the dance, but even more than that, I wasn't looking forward to the next five hours being tortured by my sisters and daughter.

I knew it wouldn't actually be painful, but it would be horrific. Alice was right back into playing "Bella Barbie," but now she didn't even bother in feigning the kindness. She just got right down to business; disguised torture be damned.

"Be strong, Bella." Jasper whispered as he reached the couch.

I reached Alice's bathroom at exactly two thirty; I had timed it perfectly so that I wouldn't have to stand for any extra time in their confines.

They went right to work; not so much as a 'hi mom' or a 'have a seat Bella." Nope, they simply slammed me down into the seat and began to mess with my hair and face.

I tried to think of other things; things that would distract me from this fiasco.

I thought about my parents; they were in their late fifties, early sixties, now. I couldn't help but wonder what they look like.

I thought about Renesmee as a baby; she was adorable… all the cuteness of a baby with the personality of a child. _She was my unique little girl… now she was my teenage captor. Ugh!_

_Okay, happy thoughts… happy thoughts._

I don't know what brought me to the memory, but it's like shutting the gates on a flood; it's already halfway through so you might as well let it flow.

***Flashback***

I had slept for a few hours. I knew that much. It was still dark outside and I knew Edward was there. His arms encircled me; holding me as I lay across his chest.

I refused to open my eyes; to burst my perfect bubble. But I knew that he had to know that I was awake. Even with my calmed breathing it wasn't close enough to the deep breaths I took while sleeping. He knew.

I attempted to stay still; as still as him. After a few minutes he spoke, "Bella… you know that you're a terrible actress."

I stayed still, refusing to give up so easily. "Bella, honestly, just say something." He was laughing slightly, hoping that I could be coerced into answering him. Again, I stayed as still as was possible for me.

Then he began to rub tiny circles on my hip; my bare hip.

It all rushed back to me then. We made love last night. _Wow_. We actually did that. I began to laugh for lack of a better reaction as I began to realize the coldness of his skin against mine was the reason that I had woken up. "What's so funny, love?"

"Nothing… everything… I don't know." I squeezed my arms around him tighter and he laughed. "I love you, Edward." I couldn't form my thoughts into actual explanations at the moment, but at least I could let him know the reason for my giggles.

"I should hope so, Bella. We did make love not five hours ago." He kept rubbing the circles on my hip; not in a lustful, 'let's go another round' way, but in an 'I'll love you forever if you let me' way.

"Yes. Yes we did." I muttered, clearly blushing. "Is Charlie here yet?" The thought came out of nowhere and now I was sitting straight up in bed praying that my father wouldn't come in to check on me and then find me naked in bed with my boyfriend of eight months. _That would end beautifully._

"He's working the overnight shift, remember. He'll be back at six and it's only four thirty." Edward kissed my hair. "Don't worry, I won't let him see either of us in… this condition."

Relieved, I nuzzled back into Edward's neck. I was safe there; loved there. "I told you that you wouldn't hurt me." I spoke softly, gently.

"Yes, you did, but I do wish you wouldn't have attacked me so." He laughed to show he wasn't actually mad at me.

"Whatever, I believe I made my point. It's you and me, Edward… always." We had started last night in an argument. _I know, cliché. _I had attempted to seduce him; if you can even call what I did seducing; which he apparently did. I told him that if we were going to spend our lives together, however that may be, we needed to move on physically in the relationship. He was unresponsive, but the heat rose with us and somehow… we just fell into each other. Completely spontaneous; and completely amazing.

He moved his hand from my hip up to my ribcage; again in a purely loving way. I winced when he reached the midpoint between my chest and belly button. "What?!" Edward was as far away from me as the bed allowed as he pulled the quilt from my body.

He gasped as I touched the purplish bruise forming just over my ribs. Edward reached out slowly, allowing his hand to mask the mark completely. As he pulled away, without touching me, I noticed that the mark was in the shape of a hand; his hand. "Edward…" I worried that he'd feel guilty, or try and leave me.

His eyes stayed fixed on the mark for several minutes before his mouth moved. "I'm so sorry, Bella. I… I…" He couldn't finish his statement.

I tried to caress his face, but he backed away from me and was now on the floor next to the bed. "Edward, it's okay. It really doesn't-"

"It's okay that I did that to you? That I bruised you; that I hurt you?" He was calmer than I expected, but still the anger was evident.

"You didn't mean to; I know that."

"Just like I didn't mean to do _that_ or _that_ either, right?" He pointed to my left hip and right shoulder quickly. There were matching handprints on both spots. I looked to his face and his head hung in shame.

I pulled the quilt up and over my one shoulder to mask the marks while I spoke. "It's sore, but I only winced because it was unexpected. I didn't feel pain, Edward. I had no idea I even had bruises."

Edward scoffed at me. "Stop! Listen to me." He looked into my eyes, but I could see his reluctance. "I never felt pain last night; except for the expected. _You _didn't hurt me. I wanted you to hold me and you did, but it was never painful. You know me, I bruise easily. Please Edward, don't ruin this by feeling regretful. Please." He looked at me for several minutes, but never spoke. I was at a loss. "I'm sorry Edward."

He moved quickly; so quickly that I didn't see him. "Why are you sorry?"

I couldn't help the slow tears that fell as I leaned into Edward's chest. "I'm sorry I'm human. I'm sorry that I'm weak and that I bruise and that you are feeling guilty about it. I'm sorry for… I'm just sorry."

"Oh Bella…" He began to rub my back and while I felt another bruise being touched I resisted the urge to wince. Thankfully his cold touch seemed to be soothing it now. "I'm sorry that I upset you. I'm sorry I'm upset. It wasn't my intention to make you cry or feel this way. I should have known better though; I should've had more restraint." He was fierce in the end of his statement. He really was mad at himself.

"Stop it, please, Edward. Just stop blaming yourself. It was perfect. So what if I got a few bruises? It's not like it's uncommon on my body."

"True."

"Please, can we just go back to before we saw the bruises; back to that happy bubble we were in?" I was desperate to go back to then.

"No, we can't go back." I sighed, feeling the disappointment as he continued. "But I can let it go. I can push it away for the time being."

It was probably the best deal I could hope for, but still, I couldn't settle for it. I turned to face him and held his face in my hands. "I want you to push it away; all the blame, all the guilt, all the moodiness. I just want you here with me. I don't want you dwelling on it forever; I don't want you dwelling on it at all. Edward, last night was perfect and beautiful and all together mind-blowing. Please don't have second thoughts about us. You would never hurt me on purpose and you didn't. I wanted you to hold me and I was _so_ happy when you did. Edward, I love you." I kissed his lips while he soaked up my words.

After a second, he responded and kissed me with more passion. It didn't last long, and I wasn't surprised when he broke the kiss. He tucked the quilt around my body a bit more, since I was still naked, and stroked my cheek.

"Bella, I'm sorry. I'm ruining this for you; for myself. I'm ruining the most important and most wonderful night of my existence. Forgive me, my love."

_Did he just say most wonderful? _"Of course."

"I won't hurt you like that again." He said it more for himself, I'm sure, but I chimed in as well.

"I know you won't, but don't think we won't be repeating last night's activities."

He laughed and pulled me closer. "I didn't even consider that, love."

"Good."

"By the way, happy birthday, Bella." He kissed my head and I fell asleep soon after.

***End Flashback***

I wasn't sure why the memory came back to me, but I was relieved when it passed. It wasn't a fond memory, mostly because it was the beginning of the end. I hadn't thought back to it in years.

I looked into the mirror that Renesmee had placed me in front of during my trip down memory lane. My hair was done, my makeup finished, and my dress hugged my skin. I looked good; fine even, but it was just a dress and some product that enhanced the vampire beauty.

Alice was getting ready, along with Renesmee, in the other room. Rose walked in as I stared into the mirror.

"You've been in here for like ten minutes, you okay?"

_Ten minutes? I guess I got a little lost in my thoughts._

"Yeah, I'm fine. You look beautiful, Rose."

"You do, too, Bella." She came to stand by me and looked into the mirror with me. "It's gonna be a good night." She squeezed my shoulder and then walked back into Alice's bedroom.

"A good night…" I whispered; unsure.

**A/N: I suck, I know! It was emotional and then happy bonding, then happy fluff, followed by typical brooding and then happy, and then solemn. It wasn't what I planned at all, but I can't change it… somehow it's completely perfect. **

**During the break, I am going to work on my extras, so keep a look out for that. I'm not going to post any new chapters in the actual story until those are done because I'm already behind.**

**With that being said, I'm planning on the formal to be two chapters long and it will make an appearance probably mid-December… maybe sooner, maybe later. **

**Thank you for your support, reviews, comments, and luck. I love my readers!!!**

**Keep up the comments and reviews; you know I love them :)**

**~kmwhyte**


	28. Cinderella's Got To Go

**Things I own: A brand-new Garmin GPS and a 2009 Nikon Coolpix Camera.**

**Things I don't own: Twilight, it's characters, and the songs I make reference to.**

**A/N: After the first Emmett POV, Rose's and Emmett's POVs shift a lot because they happen simultaneously. It should be clear by the dialogue but just in case…**

**EmPOV (Emmett)**

This ride is awkward. No, this ride totally sucks.

Alice insisted that we take a limo to the formal to give Nes a "traditional" formal experience. _That part is fine._ Unfortunately, after the countless pictures and poses that we all had to stand in at our home, then we had to go pick up _Dave_, or whatever the hell his name is. _Stupid teenage dumbass._

Alice insisted, yet again, that those two should get the captain seats near the door. And because they would be at one end of the limo, Bella, Edward, and myself would be at the other.

Apparently we have been deemed the most "embarrassing" and "intimidating." _I prefer the term protective, thank you._

So here I freaking sit, in between Edward and Bella. They won't talk to each other and I'm supposed to make them seem normal to the human. _Oh, and I'm not allowed to rip his head off if he touches Nes._

Ugh!

***

**RoPOV (Rosalie)**

_Alright, here it goes… swallow the pride and suck it up…_

I walked over to Edward, allowing only remorse to enter my mind. I had a part to play; whether or not I wanted to play it was still being debated… but honestly if it made Renesmee happy, I'd do it. _I'm a good aunt. _I smiled to myself; refocusing on the task at hand.

Edward hadn't noticed me yet; he was too focused on watching Bella at the table across from him. She was chatting with Jasper.

Edward seemed… wistful.

"Come dance, Edward?" He looked to me like I had instantly grown four extra arms sprouting from my head of all places.

"Not arms; I was thinking you grew a heart…" He mumbled, while I resisted the urge to rip his ears off his body. _That wouldn't make too much of a scene, right? _I smiled as threateningly as possible. "Why?" He responded.

"Because." It wasn't a good enough answer for him. "Because you don't have a dance partner and this is a dance, Edward. Now get off your ass and dance with me." I rushed to finish the statement.

He looked at me questioningly, "Dance with Emmett."

"He's got a dance partner." I pointed to Emmett escorting Bella out to the floor. "This could work in your favor, Edward." I pointed out sweetly.

"Fine." Edward took my hand and walked out to the opposite side of the dance floor from Emmett and Bella.

"_Yeah, this'll work, Edward. Could you be any further away…" _

***

**EmPOV (Emmett)**

I waited for Jasper to leave Bella's side. We all had a part to play here; and I needed to wait for my cue.

"Hey Bells, wanna dance with the best dressed man here?" She laughed at my humor. I must admit, I still miss the blush. _Damn, it always made it even funnier…_

"No thanks, Emmett. You know how well dancing and I get along…" She didn't need to elaborate any further; she was clumsiness turned human… when she was human.

"Oh please; you're one of _us _now. You could join the ballet if you wanted to. Come on, baby sister, dance with your big brother." _How could she resist me; I mean really?_

"I'm gonna have to say no, Emmett; no offense." I gave her the puppy dog eyes; _Rose had a hard time resisting those…_ "Why don't you ask Rose, Emmett?"

"She's busy." Bella looked at me curiously.

"Isn't she usually _busy _with you?" I nodded, fighting a smile. _She made a good point._

"Bella, Bella. Come on, I'll be your first dance of the night." She hesitated; I knew I was winning her over. "One dance?" I smiled sheepishly at her for effect.

She huffed as she relented, taking my hand. "You win. But it would actually be my first dance in over twenty years." She laughed without humor as she settled into my arms.

I know people think I'm slow, but it didn't take me long to figure out the last time she had danced, or with whom. "Well, then it's… an honor, little sister." She laughed again, relaxing her arms and gliding with me like a pro. "So the last time you danced was…" I didn't finish my thought; I didn't want to shorten her fuse any more than it was due to being a vampire mother. _Her temper sure was something from what I've heard from Alice and Edward… granted it wasn't what I would classify as a temper, but it definitely wasn't mousy little Bella. _

"Since prom, yeah." She sighed, obviously reminiscing.

I looked past her, seeing Edward dancing with Rosalie; although he was barely hiding the fact that he was listening in. "Better or worse than this dance?" I asked her, pulling her from her thoughts.

"… Different, can't really compare it, Emmett." I nodded in agreement. It was different. Then they were together and we all had varying theories of how this all would end up; and by no means did we think Renesmee (my darling, devious niece) would pop into the mix.

***

**RoPOV (Rosalie)**

"What ya looking at, Eddie?" He was staring, quite obviously, at Emmett and Bella.

"Nothing." _Dismissive… wonder why? What's she saying to him?_ I couldn't hear them through the crowd and with the combined distance, but he wasn't quite as hindered as me with his ability. "This is her first dance since prom… over twenty years ago," he whispered.

"And, what do you think about that? Cause, I'd rather a guess that she holds that memory closer to her heart since she hasn't tried to replace it." It wasn't very discreet, but honestly, who am I trying to fool? Edward knows me well enough that I never do anything nice without a reason. I hummed along with the music, masking my thoughts.

Edward looked to me then, catching on to some part of the scheme; although without any real proof or ideas. "What are you playing at? Why'd you ask me to dance?"

I sighed, thinking only one thing. _Retribution. _"It's me making amends, Edward, just deal with it." I sighed again, seeing that he wasn't convinced. "I don't take back the things I said, but I know both of you would be happier together and so would Renesmee. If it was only for you, then I wouldn't bother, but I love Renesmee. And Bella's my sister. It took me too long to figure that all out."

"Rosalie…" _Wow, stunned into speechlessness… there's a first._ I smiled at his expense.

"Come on, why don't we switch partners?" I smiled, hoping he'd get my point.

***

**EmPOV (Emmett)**

"What ya thinking, Bells?" She had been quiet for a few moments, completely lost in thought.

"Nothing," she smiled; although I wasn't convinced.

"What's the matter?" I spun her around once; one and a half rotations so she couldn't see Edward and Rosalie who were still staring in our direction.

"Nothing, really, just thinking… about the past." _Hmm, wonder _who_ she's thinking about? I got a guess._

"Oh, could you be thinking about Edward by any chance?" She actually gasped when I said his name. _Almost as good as a blush._ I had to laugh.

"Emmett… not now, okay… not here." I could tell by how her eyes were shifting that she was looking for him; that she was sure he was listening in from somewhere. Fortunately, Edward seemed to be distracted from us at the moment.

"Alright, sorry, Bell." I saw the mist in her eyes, I pushed too far. _Stupid Emmett…_ I pulled her head to my chest and rubbed her back. "Sorry, sis." She sighed as I comforted her.

I held my little sister for a few minutes till I sensed Rosalie approaching. _I can't describe the way I feel when she gets close to me. Even without sight I could _feel _her there._ I tapped Bella on the back to signal that we had company. Whether she liked it or not, Edward was here.

"I do believe that's my husband you're cozying up to Bella." Rosalie acted all… well, Rose-like and Bella turned to stare at her. "Mind if I take him back?" They both smiled at each other as I felt Bella squeeze me before pushing me towards my charming wife.

Rose wasted no time ushering me away to the corner of the dance floor that she has previously occupied with Edward. "Have fun, you two." She mumbled.

***

**EdPOV (Edward)**

She looked beautiful, no, she looked gorgeous.

No, even that word couldn't compare to her; I don't think any word could. But, still she was sad; her eyes were misty and she looked to be… remembering something, a distinct memory. _What I wouldn't give to see what she's thinking…_

"_Ask her to dance, dumbass!"_ Emmett's mind alerted me to the fact that I was still staring as her. She watched as Rosalie and Emmett walked away from us and right before she turned away from me, I spoke.

"Dance with me?" _Smooth, very charming…_ I chastised myself for the incredibly awkward look I had been rewarded with for the cavalier way I asked her to dance.

She bit her lip, just like old times and I ached to touch her lips. To simply pull the lip from the pressure she was cruelly delivering. Although it didn't matter, she was durable now; her skin could take it. And no blood would be split over the action. "I don't… I don't think that's a good idea, Edward."

I grabbed her wrist as she turned away from me. I know she felt the electricity; she had to have felt it. She looked at my hand on her wrist; the hand that was splayed upon the mark that, although faded, was still present from her time with James. Her face rose to meet mine and I lost myself in her golden eyes for moment; the burnt butterscotch, molten in her eyes. "Just a dance; for old time's sake. Please?" _I'll beg; hell, I'll do anything just to touch her again._

She hesitated, looking to my hand on her again. Sighing, she resigned. "Alright, one dance…" I twisted her hand until it fit comfortably into my own. I placed my hand on her lower back; although I was quickly removed from that destination with my hand placed higher. She placed her hand on my shoulder and I didn't try to fight the smirk that escaped because of her actions.

We swayed in silence for a few moments. I tried to focus on the lyrics; voices were lost while I held Bella in my arms.

"_Hoping for the best, but expecting the worst. Are you gonna drop the bomb or not? Let us die young or let us live forever. We don't have the power, but we never say never…"_

Never were truer lyrics…

"Renesmee seems to be having a good time." I smiled as I turned Bella around so she could see what I was seeing; Renesmee giggling, nestled in David's chest. _Not where I wanted her, but I would seem like a bit of a hypocrite at this very moment._

"Yeah; she'll always remember it forever. Thanks." I smiled as she watched our daughter.

"For what?"

"For coming; for agreeing to come and for getting everyone here for her." I looked to her for more clarity. "I don't know." She looked down at her feet, probably thinking the same thing I was at that moment; the last time we danced, she was on my feet.

"You look so beautiful tonight, Bella." I lowered my hand to the small of her back as I said it.

Bella stiffened in my arms. "God. Why'd you have to say that?" She tried to pull away from me, but I held on tight.

"Why? I can't pay you a compliment now?"

She shook her head, looking away from me. "You don't mean it as _just a compliment_. And I… I can't… I can't do this." She pulled away again, but still I held onto her.

I couldn't take it anymore. I had to ask her. I had to put it all on the table. "Do you love me?"

Her golden eyes jolted to mine. "What?" It was a whisper, barely audible to humans, although none were focused on us at a moment from what I could tell.

"Do. You. Love. Me? Are you in love with me, Bella? Like I'm in love with you?" Bella's breathing hitched as I spoke the words out loud. I had been holding them in for months now; and now they were pouring out without a filter.

She stared into my eyes for an immeasurable amount of time before breaking the stare between us and searching frantically around us for an escape. She was panicked, overwhelmed. But I couldn't force myself to feel guilty about it.

Suddenly, her eyes stopped searching; she had found something to hold her attention. I looked to where were sight was focused. Alice, Jasper, Rose, Emmett, and Renesmee all stood in the corner staring at us; watching for the fireworks. _Their thoughts, not mine._

Suddenly, I felt Bella stiffen and rip herself from my grasp. She stared into my eyes; eyes that were begging her to understand and wait for an explanation. But she didn't. After a mumbled curse, she was gone. She flew nearly at an inhuman speed; almost blowing our cover.

Within a second, I tuned into all of their thoughts. All thoughts in different tones and dialects, but still all shouting the same command at me; _"go after her!"_

Renesmee came up behind me, touching my shoulder lightly. "Go get her, Daddy." With my confusion boiling under the surface, I ran.

**A/N: *Hides between her couch and coffee table* Sorry, really sorry. I know, it totally sucks to lead all the way up to that point and then stop. I know, I totally get how frustrating it is to end on a cliffhanger, but really I didn't have a choice. I'll start the next chapter soon.**

**BTW, I told you all earlier that I was changing the plot to make a happy ending happen sooner and I meant it. Happiness coming soon; just over the horizon. After the next chapter, look to the extras for the alternate way it was gonna end in my original plot line. I love it, but it is a little on the corny side and it would have made you all wait so much longer for the happy times. **

**Also, check out the extras; there's nine of them now and I gotta say, I like them a lot. They fit the story, but aren't necessary for the plot to be complete. Just a little more flavor for your fanfiction craving :)**

**Thanks for the lovely reviews… they make me happy :)**

**Keep up the comments and reviews; you know I love them :)**

**~kmwhyte**


	29. Halfway Gone

**Things I own: Twilight Scene It for Wii and a New Moon Calendar.**

**Things I don't own: Twilight, its characters, and the songs I make reference to.**

**A/N: Okay, here is the chapter! Truth be told, this was easy to write but very tedious to work through. I can't bring myself to add what's going on inside the school with the rest of the family. Edward will shine some light but I think it takes away from Bella and Edward. Be warned, it's not terribly long, but it's what most of you have been waiting for.**

**With that, Enjoy!**

Give me a word you can keep  
Cause I'm halfway gone and I'm on way  
And I'm feeling, feelin feelin this way  
Cause you're halfway in but don't take too long  
Cause I'm halfway gone, I'm halfway gone

_Halfway Gone by Lifehouse_

**BPOV (Bella)**

"_Do you love me?"_ He had said.

"_Do. You. Love. Me? Are you in love with me, Bella? Like I'm in love with you?" _He meant it, I saw his eyes; he truly meant it.

But, as much as I wanted to smile and tell him 'yes', I just couldn't. I panicked. I can't explain why. I lost my nerve and began looking for an escape.

As much as I don't need oxygen, I couldn't seem to remember that fact when he touched me and said those words.

Then… then I saw them. All of them. Alice and Renesmee, I could understand. But Jasper, Emmett and Rosalie? I thought they were on my side. They had let me talk about my issues; at least in my vague ways. But, there they were watching as he bombarded me with those beautiful words that I pray are true.

_Confusion was first. I didn't understand anything for a brief moment. Then anger; how could they set me up? _

Yet, it was the third emotion that set me in motion.

_Wonder_.

_Was he a part of this? Did he use them to set me up? Was I just a pawn; a pitiful Bella being manipulated?_

That's when I ran. I ripped myself from his grip and ran as fast as I could. There were too many people and too much pressure. Did they really think that would sway me to taking that chance then? To admit my fears and feelings and hope that everything goes smoothly? I may not be human, but I'm still susceptible to those insecurities.

_Besides… he can't love me anymore. I'm not the same Bella._

Once I was out of the gym, I turned right. I planned to head to the opposite side and then just keep going. Hell, I could run to Canada… hell, I could swim to China. I didn't have a plan; but I had no desire to stay there. I needed a true escape; from all of them.

But then, the rational side decided to speak and I thought about Renesmee. My beautiful, thoughtful, manipulating, meddling, inconsiderate daughter that will be grounded for the next twenty years because of her involvement.

As angry as I was, I couldn't leave her. What kind of impression would that leave?

I'd be like him. Just when things get too hard, I leave; just like him.

I ended up stopping about a mile away; straight in front of my exit. The trees were huddled together and, at the very least, made me feel like I was escaping everything.

I bent my knees slowly, slower than humanly possible, and sunk to the ground. I leaned against a large oak which was as wide as two Emmetts. I nestled my hands in my lap. My dress; a mess with tattered seams lining the forest floor. I couldn't seem to care as my hair fell from the up-do when my head rested upon the trunk. I couldn't place who I was angrier at. I couldn't place who I felt did the least damage to my trust. I couldn't decide how to even attempt to repair the damage. _Were Esme and Carlisle in on it, as well?_

My head fell into my hands as the thoughts clouded my mind. Then I heard it; one voice calling for me. "Bella! Bella?" It was him and although he would find my easily since I was not moving, I called back after his, painfully, mumbled 'please.'

"Over here." _Short. Simple. To the point. But what else do I say?_

"Oh thank God; I thought you'd be in another state by now…" He ran to my side before bending down to my level. I held my hand out to him; a signal for him to stop. I couldn't allow him to touch me.

"Bella, please, just let me explain-" I shook my head, cutting his thoughts off. I looked into his eyes and saw the regret, but I couldn't decipher where it was stemming from.

After a breath, I asked, "Were you a part of it? Was it your plan?"

He sighed, as he scooted to my side. "No. I had no idea that this all was just a scheme of theirs. I didn't even realize till you saw them. I wasn't focusing on their thoughts at the time and they've been very good about shutting me out lately." I chanced a look into his eyes again, and saw the hope; hoping that I believed, that I understood. "Bella, please believe me. I wouldn't have pursued you like that, if I had known; I would have…"

He didn't finish, and although I had a fairly good idea what he was alluding to, I had to know. "You would have what?" I whispered.

"I wouldn't have allowed it. I would have told you some other time and been honest with you about all of this." He words rang in my ears. _He would have been honest. Honesty… He was being honest about his feelings…_

I took his hand in mine. It felt so different from the last time that I remember; although those memories were fuzzy. He squeezed my hand and I knew that he wouldn't let me go this time. He would sooner rip off his own hand then release it.

And truth be told, I'd rather he tear mine from me than let it go from his warm, loving grasp.

"You didn't answer me back there. I know you got distracted, but…" He whispered softly. His head getting closer to my face all the while. I put my other hand on his cheek and he leaned into it, closing his eyes.

"I don't…" His eyes snapped open, fearful for my answer. I smiled, hoping to reassure him. "I don't know how to give you an easy answer. And I don't want to explain myself halfway. We have to be honest, about everything this time. Listen?" He nodded, and smiled at me words. The nervousness was still there, but was lessened.

"I love you. I've always loved you; there isn't anyone else for me. There never was." He smiled, moving closer to me; our lips only inches apart. I moved my hand from his cheek to his chest, halting his movement; which only made him look to me in confusion.

"You have to listen to everything." I smiled, and ran my hand over his furrowed brow. "I forgive you for lying to me. I forgave you a long time ago, but I'm scared."

"I won't leave again, _ever_." He hissed, like he couldn't believe that I was still unclear on that fact.

"I know you don't want to and that you truly believe that you won't. But I'm not scared because of that. I know you aren't lying to placate me." I ran my hand from his cheek to his neck and into his hair, nearly forgetting the fact that I was speaking. "But, when you left, you left human Bella. And I'm not her anymore. I'm not naïve or ignorant or weak. I'm a mom and I'm scared that you won't see me the same anymore."

He opened his mouth to deter me, but I stopped him by placing my hand over his supple lips. "You promised to listen and you've interrupted me three times now. Stop it!" I removed my hand, only to receive his beautiful, dazzling smirk. He nodded and I continued.

"You're the same person, Edward. You're exactly who I feel in love with. But I'm not." I took a deep breath. "What if you don't love me as much anymore? All I can think of is what will happen if that is true. What am I supposed to do when you tell me one morning that it's not the same? I can't just stay with you all for Renesmee's sake. I can't watch as you find another mate. I can't go through that heartbreak again. I can't survive that again, and I can't lose Renesmee. I'm scared that you won't want me now; now that I'm not who you fell in love with so long ago."

The tears were burning my eyes, seeking the impossible release. I looked into his eyes and saw the question. He wanted to talk, but wasn't about to interrupt me again. I look a deep breath again, willing the tears to dissipate. "I can't lose you again, Edward." I leaned into his chest, tucking my head under his chin.

"Oh, Bella." He sighed. "Can I talk now?" I chuckled, holding on to dear life, and nodded my head.

"Bella, you're not getting rid of me. I'm not leaving you, ever. I'm glad you told me why you're afraid. It makes sense now, but honestly that is the worst theory you have _ever_ come up with. I think radioactive spiders were better." I laughed into his chest, praying that he wouldn't let me go.

"You don't realize how much I love you, do you? Bella, it's not whether you're a human or a vampire, or if you're a young eighteen year old or a nearly forty year old, trapped in an eighteen year old's body. It's your heart, your soul, that I love. And honestly, you haven't changed as much as you think you have."

"I thought we didn't have souls…" I mumbled. While I still believed as I did when I was human, I was anxious for him to yield to my point of view.

"Should have seen that coming…" he mumbled right back. "How could I question whether we have souls when we created our daughter? Bella you're still you; you're just… more durable and a little more… independent." He kissed my hair and began to rub my back.

I attempted to pull back. There was one thing left I needed to do. My explanation was incomplete. But he refused to let me budge. "Edward, could you let me move?"

"No. I'm _not_ letting you go, Bella. You're not getting away from me this time." He whispered into my hair, laughing all the while.

"Okay, that's fine. But I was really hoping to kiss you; is that not allowed?" He jerked at my words and suddenly I was released. I smiled at his reaction and leaned into his lips. They weren't hard stone anymore; but soft, like mine used to be. There wasn't such a contrast now. His lips parted; never in my time with him had his lips done that. I tasted him; his honey, Edward taste. His tongue touched mine and the electricity that I felt on the dance floor increased ten-fold.

And then, I reacted the same way that I had all those years ago. I attacked him. I flipped my body onto his lap and secured my hands into his hair. This time, though, he didn't stop me. This time, his hands found my waist, only to have him encircling my waist in his arms after a brief moment.

With neither of us needing air, we continued for… well _I'm not sure how long, but a while._

After several short pecks, he began to laugh. "What's so funny?" I encouraged as I pulled his face to look at me, a move that wouldn't have been possible so long ago.

"Nothing, just… they'll all wondering where we are and what happened, but they're all too scared to come find out. They are terrified of you and apparently Alice has seen at least one vision of me verbally and physically assaulting the lot of them." He chuckled once more as I relaxed.

"Do they know?" I didn't need to expand, not with him. He knew me well enough to guess at what I was thinking.

"Not at all. Renesmee is screwing up her ability. Every time Renesmee makes a different decision, all the visions alter. And because Renesmee wants to find us, she has no clue in what state we'll be found." I raised my eyebrow. "Relationship-wise," he laughed again, kissing my lips lightly.

"Do we have to tell them?" I uttered the words before thinking it out; without a proper explanation formed.

Edward looked at me curiously. "What do you mean? They're bound to emerge eventually and then they'll know. No second thoughts?" He hands held on to my sides just a bit tighter as the words left his lips.

I leaned into him, whispering in his ear. "Not at all." I pulled back and cradled his face in my hands. "But, I want _this_ to ourselves; for a while. And… I kind of want to teach them a lesson. I don't like the fact that they think they can manipulate us."

"Technically, they did." He stated.

I hit his chest; and for once, I felt no pain from the action. "They don't need to know that. At least, not yet. I say we let them think it blew up in their faces."

"Bella, I don't know." He looked to be in pain as he spoke the words, so I stroked his face, hoping to calm him. "I don't want to be away from you. And we'd have to be, to keep Alice's visions blocked."

"It'll just be for a little while. I don't want to be away from you for too long either. My heart couldn't take it." I whispered, knowing the truth in the statement.

"You're not that good of an actress…" He mumbled, trying, uselessly, to deter me from my plan.

I pulled myself back. I gripped his hands and pulled us both up effortlessly. "Excuse me? I have been acting like an emancipated minor and sister for nearly fourteen years now."

"And I follow a story similar to that as well. You observed the technique. I'm sure many found some of your lies less than believable. How often do you actually eat the food that you're pretending to consume?" He smirked, holding onto my hands like they were a lifeline.

"No fair… turn my anger towards you and you won't be nearly as happy, Edward." I warned.

"I'm just saying that you'd probably unearth your own plan while lying." He smiled, dazzling me momentarily before I regained my determination.

"You wanna bet? I bet that I'll keep the secret better than you; in fact, I bet that you'll blow it before I do." I smiled, knowing how he was just as much a sucker for bets as Emmett.

The glare was proof enough that he was on board, but he still tried to speak to me as if it wasn't an option. "Is this a punishment for them or me?"

I stepped closer, tracing his lapels and tie as I spoke. "It's a _point _that I'm trying to make to them and favor that I want you to help me with."

"What are your terms?"

He relented. _Knew it!_ "If you lose, we take this slow. I need slow, Edward. I can't jump back into us too quickly; hence the bet…" I admitted.

Edward sighed, knowing he was playing this game whether he liked it or not. "Okay, deal. But if you lose, then we go to Isle Esme and take it slow there, alone." I lifted my eyebrow. "We'll take it slow, I promise. But we'll stay there for the duration; even if it takes years." He winked.

"Deal." I kissed his lips. _So soft and sweet._ "Alright, I'm off… and you didn't catch me." I said before running off into the woods.

**A/N: 1360 review… *squeals like a twelve year old* By, the way... next chapter is my newest baby and has been half written for two months :) I expect many more reviews for that kind of delivery... ****My one request; tell me what you liked in your review… those kinds of reviews really make me happy and I reply to any questions… which by the way:**

**How much did Edward really know about the scheme? **

**He knew exactly what he told Bella; he's not going to lie to her anymore. He won't risk it.**

**Was Rosalie, Emmett, and Jasper really in on everything? What was their motivation?**

**They want Bella, Edward, and Renesmee to be happy. Jasper, as I've had him admit, just does what Alice wants to at a certain point. Rosalie will do anything for Nes and does hope that Bella is happy. And Emmett, well as much as he cares for Bella and Edward; he's just terrified of Nes ;) **

**Keep up the comments and reviews; you know I love them :)**

**I hope to have a new chapter out soon but I do have the promised "extra/alternate ending" to do first… and I'm hoping that will be done within the week (School is starting again, sorry real life awaits… at least no cliffs to hold you over this time)**

**~kmwhyte**


	30. I Run to You

**Disclaimer: I own NOTHING, but I really wish I did since I love to manipulate the characters ;)**

**BPOV (Bella)**

It had been two days.

Two days since formal; two days since Edward and I decided to be us again; two days since we convinced the rest of the family we never would be and that we were angry with them; two days since I had kissed Edward; two days since I had seen, or spoken, to Edward.

It had been a very long two days.

I hadn't heard exactly what happened when Edward went back to _them. _I know they hadn't figured it out and that they believed we were unfixable.

I'm not sure how Edward convinced them, but he did. I was thankful and regretful at the same time. I wanted to be with him, but I also wanted to win.

I couldn't think of anything to do to distract myself. Ultimately I ended up in my room, while Renesmee slept the night away, lying in my bed just thinking about Edward. We couldn't be around each other if we wanted to teach them all to mind their own business. And as much as I was regretting that decision right now, I had to admit that both Alice and Renesmee needed to learn this lesson.

I closed my eyes thinking about how happy Edward looked when I finally let go of all my issues; he is so gorgeous when he smiles…

There was a loud tapping at my window, followed by the window being creaked open.

I didn't open my eyes; I knew it was Edward. Although he was usually quieter. His scent struck my senses and I was immediately at peace again. "What are you doing here?" I whispered.

"Renesmee's asleep and the rest of the family is hunting… and I missed you," he confessed.

I felt my smile grow larger. "…I missed you, too, Edward. Come here." I patted the space beside me, so he could lie down as well. Before a full ten seconds passed; I was encased in his arms with my head tucked into the crook of his shoulder. _God, I've missed this…_

"I've really missed _this_." His words echoing my thoughts.

"Me too." We laid in silence for a few minutes before I felt the need to ask him a question. "What are you thinking about?"

He chuckled; causing my arm that had been placed over his chest to shake slightly. "That used to be my line."

"Well, if you tell me, maybe you'll be granted the same courtesy," I stupidly promised.

"That is tempting…" He made me wait several minutes before he continued; no doubt making me feel how he had so many years ago when I would hold out on him. "I was just thinking about how much I missed this, and how I made every mistake to not have it again. I should've never left you; I should've come back sooner; I should've found you-"

"Edward, stop." I placed two fingers over his perfect lips to interrupt his apologies. They weren't needed anymore; I had already forgiven him. "Don't start that. I know you feel guilty, but I don't want to hear it anymore. I forgave you a long time ago, before I even told you that I did. I wish you had stayed a few more days because then you would have known about the little gift you left growing inside of me, but honestly, I'm glad it worked out this way. I got time with her and now we'll be a family forever."

It sounded more heartless than I meant for it too. I truly wished he had been with Renesmee and me for the past twenty years, but I liked how my life had progressed to this point. I had a beautiful daughter, a wonderful family, and a perfect mate; I got what I wanted. I couldn't bring myself to regret the way it happened since everything had worked out to our favor.

"I'm still _so _sorry, Bella." He held me tighter; like he was afraid I'd evaporate in his arms.

"Fine, but stop apologizing, or I'm kicking your ass out that window." I glared at him, playfully, hoping he would just relax and enjoy the moment with me.

"Okay… I was also thinking that I wanted to kiss you." _There's the Edward I love._

"Now, that's what I wanted to hear…"

I pulled his face to mine and took over his lips with my own. He sighed and… actually purred as our tongues danced. I pulled away after a few minutes before it could go any farther than I wanted at the moment.

"Now what were you thinking about?" he whispered into my hair.

"Damn, how are you not distracted?" I looked into his eyes, looking for an answer.

"Practice."

"Sure." I playfully pushed him into the pillow and resumed my spot in the crook of his shoulder. "You honestly want to know?"

"I do."

"I was wondering if you missed it." I confessed.

"Missed… what?"

I sighed, wishing I didn't have to explain it. "I'm here in your arms; the best place in the world, ever. But I was wondering if you missed how it used to be when I was human. You know; my breathing, my heartbeat, my softness, my blush, my sleep talking…"

He tucked a lock of my hair behind my ear, stopping my rambling. "You are still just as absurd, you know that. You think I miss those things… you really want to know?"

"Yes." I willed myself to be strong, expecting the worst.

"You still breathe, Bella, and it still feels amazing when your breath washes over my face, but I definitely don't miss you requiring regular breaths. For instance, now I can kiss you without worrying about you passing out on me."

He turned my head to softly kiss my lips. "Stop distracting me…" I mumbled through my haze.

"Sorry…" He laughed. "Where was I… the heartbeat?" I nodded, hoping he would continue. "I have your former heartbeat, and all frenzied variations, completely immersed in my memory. It got me through the twenty years without you but… no, I don't miss it. I can tune it in whenever I want."

I smiled, faintly remembering my embarrassment when my heart rate picked up. I quickly changed the subject. "And my blush?"

"While you always looked incredibly cute and… sexy when you blushed," he whispered. It would have done the trick if I was human. "I do not miss the blood that caused it to form. Do you remember the first human you smelled after your transformation?" Of course I remembered. I was frightened of killing Angela for so long. "Multiply that by fifty and then imagine kissing it. Do you really think I miss that? I wouldn't be nearly as comfortable _here_ if that was still a factor." I nodded, soaking in his words.

"As for your softness; you are soft, Bella. You're just more durable. Now I don't have to worry about wrapping my arms around you and accidently crushing your bones in my fervor." I chuckled when he pulled me into his hard chest.

"How'd you do it? Not kill me when we were _together_, I mean." I had smashed so many computers, cell phones, and other meaningless objects in a hasty situation. I had ruined books by turning a page too quickly. How did he not rip me in two while having sex with me?

"As I'm sure you recall there were several casualties; your pillows, your bottom bed sheet and a chunk of your headboard if I remember correctly." He smirked his dazzling crooked smile at me. "I was just happy that you made it through with only a few bruises. It took all I had."

"I love you." There was nothing left to say.

"I love you, too; more than anything."

It was quiet for several minutes before I remembered I had asked him more. "Hmm, what about my sleep talking?"

He chuckled. "That may be the only thing I actually miss. I _loved_ holding you in my arms and watching you sleep. The fact that you whispered what was going on inside your head every night, and the fact that you voiced your feelings about me uninhibited, was a truly wonderful bonus. But _this_… you and me here like this with my arms around you, talking like this… no contest, Bella. I have the time that I spent with you as a human in my memories and that is more than enough to make the way we are now completely blissful and without regret. I wouldn't change you back for anything."

I turned, sitting up. "You're good." I leaned down and kissed him in a deep, full of love kiss. "You're really, _really_ good."

**A/N: I hope you enjoy the bedtime fluff! I thought you all deserved it. Next chapter will resume the angst, promise. **

**Honestly, I was really concerned about the bet and if I was going to OOC, but you all encouraged it and I'm so thankful. **

**Not much to say, thanks for the reviews as always. You all are too kind and I hope you continue to be ;)**

**Read, Review and Comment – You know I love it!**

**-kmwhyte**


	31. Vertigo

**I own : an awesome Ron Jon Purse and eleven instant apple cider packets, Yum!**

**I don't own : Twilight (any of it) or the music I make reference to (well, I do have it on iTunes and some on CDs, but I don't think that's what they're talking about…)**

**EPOV (Edward)**

She turned in my arms. _My arms_; she was in _my arms, finally_. "You're good." She leaned down and kissed me; a kiss that was far from the innocent pecks I forced her to indulge me with when she was human. "You're really, _really_ good."

I twisted my hand into her hair; knotting it, I'm sure. She brushed her hand along the nape of my neck before pulling back to unlock my hand from her hair. "Slow," she whispered against my lips.

"You started that one…" I smirked, hoping that she would be forgiving. Even though she was still Bella, she had gained a bit of a temper and I wasn't ready to test it. Soon, but not yet. I'm sure of her want to stay, but, as much as it pained me, she wasn't sure of mine.

She grinned at me, stroking my cheek. "I know." I turned my head quickly to kiss her palm. "What happened, when you went back to the dance?"

"Didn't Renesmee tell you? Or Alice? Or Jasper?" I laughed as I named off a few family members. "Did the rest of them make an appearance yet? They've all been considering it."

She giggled as she settled into her former position, laying her head in the crook of my shoulder. _I could not be happier at this very moment…_

"I refused to talk to them; only Alice and Jasper came to see me. And Renesmee wouldn't look at me the first night and yesterday she wouldn't come near me. She's convinced that I'm furious with her, and I'm not exactly arguing with that theory right now." She sighed. "But honestly, I couldn't let Jasper in the house. My emotions have been all over the place the last two days."

I stroked her arms; lightly, lovingly. "I am elated that we're… _us_. I'm sad that we're apart for the time being. I'm livid with Renesmee and Alice; disappointed in Emmett, Rose, and Jasper. I'm concerned about Esme and Carlisle. I've been lonely the last few days, and I've felt guilty. But I also feel love… and a little bit of lust. I don't think I can be around Jasper till this bet is other with." She laughed as she concluded her thoughts. "I'm all over the place and I still can't help but feel okay with how things are turning out." She took my right arm and wrapped it around her waist; to which I gladly gripped to.

_This is where I wanted to be._

"Practice helps… but only so much. I'm having the same problem, love." Her breathing hitched when I called her that. And I would be lying if I didn't admit I was a little smug because of that. "I held it together when I had to run back to the formal. I pulled off the pained, rejected man very well, I believe." _Hell, I've had years of practice at this point._Bella scratched her nails lightly over my arm, still wrapped around her waist, allowing me the time to continue. "Alice and Renesmee were the only vocal ones. The others were too shocked to say anything, but still the only things they could ask were, 'what happened' and 'where were you.' They knew that you weren't coming back but they couldn't bring it in themselves to realize they failed." _Although they actually hadn't._

"What else?" she whispered, although I knew she didn't really want to know. As much as she wanted them to suffer for their meddling, she was still feeling guilty over it.

"I yelled, at everyone. Even Renesmee, she looked so heartbroken and I know Jasper felt my remorse for that, but he didn't feel anything else. I left them there and ran home. Once there, I ran straight to my room, past Esme and Carlisle; they were completely in the dark from the plan. One by one, they came to apologize but I turned them away. Rose and Jasper are innocent except for wanting you and me to be happy. And Emmett is still scared of Renesmee. It was all Alice and our daughter; they were the masterminds."

"I'm not surprised. I figured as much." She mumbled, closing her eyes as she thought through my words.

We lay there for hours, till the sun began to creep up over the horizon. "Bella."

"Hmm?" she was afraid, of course, but basking in our position left her with very few coherent thoughts. _I'd still give anything to hear them._

"We have school in a few hours. The family will be home shortly and Renesmee will wake soon; I have to go." I regretted ever agreeing to the bet, if I hadn't we could just skip school and no one would care. _Although that wouldn't be a very good model for Renesmee._

"I know," she sighed, holding my arm over her waist just a bit tighter.

"I don't want to go," I confessed.

"But you have to," she finished.

"I love you, that doesn't change. We'll play the roles you want, teach them a lesson about minding their own business, and then… we'll be off to Isle Esme." I teased.

She pushed me off the bed quickly, but I caught myself before causing a crash to wake Renesmee. "We'll see, Edward." She closed in on me as I backed away. "Hold still," she pleaded.

I immediately halted my movements to be rewarded with a kiss. A kiss that would have to last the next 18 hours, at least. _Who knows when I'll be able to sneak out again?_

"I'll have to avoid you as much as possible, you know?" She whispered into my ear as she held herself to me.

"I know," I mumbled in her hair. "I'll miss you."

She pulled back, stroking my cheek. "We have biology and none of them are with us." She smiled. "I have a surprise for you." She pecked a chaste kiss on each corner of my mouth.

"Can't I just have it now?" I begged, not wanting to leave this perfect bubble.

She giggled; much like a teenager in love. "No, it'll be more enjoyable then, I promise. Now go, I need to get ready before Renesmee wakes up."

I sighed and kissed her forehead once more. "Goodbye for now, love."

"Bye, Edward," she whispered; her voice shaking.

**BPOV (Bella)**

I smelled like him and as much as it pained me, I had to wash him away if only to fool Renesmee and the rest of the family.

His scent would linger in my bed, for which I was grateful. _I'll need to be downstairs before Renesmee wakes so she doesn't detect anything._ I wasn't sure if she would, but I couldn't afford to take the chance.

I hopped in the shower, enjoying the warmth that was entirely too hot for a human. I lavished myself in the strawberry body wash, hoping Edward would appreciate it throughout the day. Even in passing, I wanted him to know I cared; that I was all in this.

A voice interrupted my thoughts about my lovely night with Edward. "Mom?" Her voice was tentative, almost shaky.

I dipped my back under the spray, washing away the soap. "Yes?" I replied, no overly enthusiastic. She had manipulated me, after all.

"Can I talk to you, Mommy?" There it is. She felt guilty; she was resorting to "mommy." Anytime she wanted something or felt she was in trouble, she used that name.

I attempted to sway her away. "Can it wait?"

"No, it really can't." She paused and I let her continue. "Mommy, I'm _so_ sorry. I shouldn't have gone behind your back. I really thought it would help you both. And I just wanted us to be happy, especially you and Dad. It was all my fault, and I'm so sorry, Mom." Her words were rushed and they caused my heart to sputter. I had to swallow the words back in my throat versus telling her everything was fine and that all was forgiven. She hadn't learned anything yet. And Alice needed to understand the lesson just as much.

I sighed heavily. "I understand you're sorry, honey. And I'm glad you are and that you know it wasn't right, but it's not that simple."

"But it could be, Mom. Dad didn't know a thing about the plan, I swear. Can't you just forgive him and be with him?"

I shut off the water, grabbing the towel a second later. "It's just not that simple, Renesmee. You need to let what happens, happen. And right now… nothing is happening with your father and me." I wrapped the towel around myself and opened the curtain. "Now go and get ready, we need to leave soon."

Renesmee wiped a tear away and I nearly lost it. _Think of the bet. Edward called you a bad actress. _I continued to berate myself into not giving her a hug and confessing everything, but honestly, I didn't care if Edward thought I was a bad actress as long as he stayed with me. It wasn't about the bet, but about the lesson I wanted Alice and Renesmee to learn. _One down, one to go…_

"Okay." She walked down the hall, as I walked to my room, breathing in the scent of him, one more time before school.

**A/N: Happy Valentine's Day! Here's your gift from me to you…**

**Now, here's the deal… the shower gel isn't Edward's surprise and most of you might guess what it will be… but let me know what you think it will be… I'm curious how it comes across.**

**FYI, I got a new puppy yesterday and I might as well have a child, so bear with me when it comes to updating, I will keep this story going till it's over… promise.**

**Read, Review and Comment – You know I love it!**

**-kmwhyte**


	32. Your Love is a Song

**I own: my Boxer puppy, Lyric and a ton of new dog toys.**

**I don't own : Twilight (any of it) or the music I make reference to (well, I do have it on iTunes and some on CDs, but I don't think that's what they're talking about…)**

**EPOV (Edward)**

Her scent lingered on me, and not just my clothes. I breathed in the aroma before stepping into the shower. I couldn't allow the bet to be lost over such a simple, yet important, thing.

Truly I didn't care about the bet, but having Bella to myself, alone on Isle Esme, definitely had its benefits. _Honestly it was a glorious list that only seemed to get longer the more I thought about it…_

I heard the family's approach as I pulled on my fresh clothing. All their thoughts were centered on Bella and me… and what a mess it had become, because of them. Alice's thoughts, in particular, had become quite self-loathing. _Guilt was the overpowering emotion for her… very fitting considering I almost lost Bella forever because of her._

I stashed my "Bella clothes" in my bathroom and then went to my couch to "sulk." The irony was not lost on me, but it did seem like it was coming full circle.

I heard Jasper's thoughts as Alice approached my door. _"Have mercy on her, Edward. She feels awful; she almost didn't come back from the hunt…"_ I felt bad for a split second before I realized that she would get a reprieve; eventually.

"Edward?" She spoke aloud before thinking the rest of her statement to me. _"Can I please talk to you before we go to school?"_

"If you must." Jasper felt my defiance and assumed that I was still furious with her because Bella had turned me away.

Alice walked in slowly before shutting the door and leaning her tiny, pixie body against it. "You know I'm sorry." She whispered. When I didn't respond she continued on. "You also know that I didn't mean for it to turn out like this. I thought everything would go back to how it used to be, except with Renesmee added to the family." I continued to ignore her, hoping that she would continue to feel the guilt for her manipulation. "Edward, please speak to me! I just wanted you two to be happy, like you both should be… together. She loves you, I'm _sure_ of it." She said fiercely, as if she was convincing herself as well as me.

I looked up from my stoic pose, showing nothing but sadness. _I hoped I was convincing enough._ "Alice. Thank you." Alice smiled, but it was short-lived as she saw what I was about to say. "But it doesn't change a thing. You caused Bella to make up her mind about us. And you caused her to give up on me. She thinks I betrayed her, and now…" I swallowed, unnecessarily, before I uttered the next words. "… Now she doesn't want me. And that is thanks to you. I'm going to need time before I can forgive you for that, Alice."

I rose to my feet and walked towards her. She moved out of my way, seeing that I was headed to school. "You all can ride in Emmett's truck today. I think it would be best." _If only for my emotional sanity. _

***

The morning passed at an exceedingly slow pace. I honestly wasn't sure if I was coming or going during the day. I counted the minutes, hell the seconds, till biology with Bella.

Having no classes in the morning with the rest of the family besides Renesmee was a plus in this situation, considering I didn't need to hide my feelings or conceal the dopey look in my eyes.

Renesmee had avoided me until the end of class. Clearly she was still upset with the fact that I had scolded her. _Actually it was more of a yelling guilt-trip, but she seemed to favor the first classification. _

After Mr. Haschal dismissed class, Renesmee approached me. "Dad?" She mumbled. I looked at her and gave her a heartbroken smile. "Daddy, I'm so sorry." She felt horrible, that much I could sense from her thoughts.

I pushed her hair behind her ear. To anyone else, it might look romantic, but here was my daughter feeling horrible and even though this was the idea, I wanted to comfort her. "I know you're sorry, Nes. But… what's done is done. Learn from this… I am." I pressed a soft kiss to her forehead and left the room. "I'll talk to you soon, baby."

***

Biology.

Praise the lord that gave me my beautiful Bella and daughter; biology was _finally_ here.

Last week our seats had been changed and now Bella sat with her lab partner, Jeremy, next to me with my lab partner, Kaitlin.

Originally I had been jealous of Jeremy, and in all honesty, I had sincerely considered scaring him into ditching on more than one occasion when he looked at specific parts of Bella's body for longer than I liked. But once Kaitlin had moved to Englewood, he was smitten. And my hatred for him lessened, but only minimally.

Bella came to sit by myself and Jeremy. She smiled, passing me a note.

_I'm writing this while Renesmee and I are in gym. I know we can't talk. If this doesn't work, I'm sorry and I'll explain some other time. If it does, keep the reaction low key._

It was simple and could possibly be taken in several different ways. No doubt she was hoping that Alice wouldn't see the note because she had been with Renesmee when she wrote it, but was covering her bases just in case.

I looked to Bella and nodded slightly. The corner of her beautiful mouth turned up before she scurried to write notes concerning mitosis; the topic we were studying. After a moment, she held her pen still over the half page of notes and her eyes closed slightly.

To anyone else, she appeared to be paying attention to the lecture, but I knew better.

After a few moments, I began to wonder what she had planned and if she was even trying to surprise me anymore.

And then it happened.

"_Edward?"_ I jolted back in my seat and she hid her giggle before the other students noticed. _"I take it you can hear me…"_

I whispered a 'yes' so low no one else would hear.

She smiled before continuing in concentration. _"I didn't know if it would work, but I have been practicing with the shield, but without a test dummy I wasn't sure if I was actually making any progress."_

Well this is definitely progress!

"_I'm pretty positive that Alice cannot see us having a silent conversation so please do not talk back."_ I nodded slightly to show I understood; however if she stopped, I may not follow those instructions.

After another smile, she continued. _"I miss you already, Edward. I'm sorry this is hard on us. I almost lost it this morning with Renesmee, but apparently I am a _good_ actress after all because she was none the wiser."_ I sighed at her teasing, knowing it was all in a joking manner. _"I do believe we will be staying locally when this is all said and done." _She couldn't contain the laugh, but covered it up with a cough within a second.

"_I love you for coming to see me last night. I take it they didn't suspect anything…"_ I didn't need to ask who she meant as I could see them all in her mind. I shook my head briefly, allowing no one else to notice our signals.

"_That's good, no need to let Alice and Renesmee off so easy. You know it brought back memories when you came through my window."_ She showed me the fuzzy memories from her human time with me. The memories where I spent the night holding her and comforting her when she was sad, sick, or having nightmares. _"They're wonderful memories, Edward. Thank you."_

After that she showed me more memories from our past; several that I had ingrained within my own memory for safe-keeping. Times that I used to reflect upon as my happiest moments in my long existence. It was fantastic knowing these were her favorite moments as well.

With ten minutes left in our class period, Bella paused. I looked to her fully, forgetting our current "relationship status." _"Edward, Alice." _I turned quickly, resuming our former positions.

"_Edward, I need to tell you something… something that I lied about… something important… and I need to tell you before we go any further. I don't want you turning away from me because of it and if you do… I won't be able to take it." _I nearly grasped her in my arms and whispered how that would never happen.

Instead, I whispered a 'go ahead.'

Bella took an unnecessary breath. _"When I told you about how I was transformed, I didn't tell you everything. I had pulled two syringes of venom out before Angela came over. When I went into labor, I told her to bring both over, but I didn't tell her what they were or what they were for." _She showed me the memory, although it was hard to decipher because of her pain and anxiety as human. _"I tried to justify it to myself. That I didn't know how much venom was needed to change or that if one didn't work I'd have a back-up. The truth was I just couldn't decide which to use."_

"_Alice seemed like the right decision. She helped me through the toughest of times without even knowing it. She was, is, my best friend. It seemed fitting. But…" _I held my breath, expecting what was coming, but fearful still._ "But I couldn't put yours back. I couldn't let you go."_

She loved me then, even when I didn't give her a reason to, even when she was going through hell because of me. Even then, she loved me… Incredible…

"_When Angela brought the venom over, I passed out. I don't think she knew what she was doing; she probably just hoped it would help in some way." _She sighed and continued to think about that painful time._ "I woke when she plunged one of the syringes into my leg. Once she took Renesmee away, I plunged the other into my heart and then began the… change."_

She hesitated, unable to put into words the answer to the question we both recognized. I longed to stroke her hand and if we had been alone, I may not have been able to resist; Alice be damned.

"_Edward,"_ she began. _"It was yours. It was your venom that went into my heart; that flows through my heart. You're a part of me; emotionally, physically, and in every other way."_

I couldn't breathe. It might not have been her intent, but she had a part of me pulsing through her for eternity. I began to think of all the other things we shared; a family, a daughter, and, hopefully, a long life.

As if she was reading my reading my thoughts, she continued._ "I used to think it was just a coincidence; an accident that ended up linking you and me together forever, whether I wanted it or not."_ She paused and twirled her pen absentmindedly. _"But now I know, it was meant to be that way, always. And I wouldn't have it any other way."_

I couldn't even pretend to breathe. I couldn't function with the new information and I certainly lacked the ability to control what I was doing and what I wanted to do.

"_Edward?"_

**A/N: Drama, drama, drama.**

**It will be at least a week or two till the next chapter… I just happened to get on a roll with this chapter and it was all I could think about while walking Lyric.**

**I hope you like it and that it doesn't get too sappy. I think I'm done with sappy after this, it's almost too much for me. **

**Thanks so much for those who review. I still try to comment on each one, but I have been in a hurry more than once and deleted them before replying… Either way, nearly 1600 reviews is just inconceivable to me and way more (like 1500 more) than I expected :)**

**Read, Review and Comment – You know I love it!**

**-kmwhyte**


	33. Follow Me Down

**I own: A brand-new 2010 Kia Soul.**

**I don't own : Twilight (any of it) or the music I make reference to (well, I do have it on iTunes and some on CDs, but I don't think that's what they're talking about…)**

**BPOV (Bella)**

_Edward, it was yours. It was your venom that went into my heart; that flows through my heart. You're a part of me; emotionally, physically, and in every other way. _

I took a breath to regain some strength. This would be the most important and difficult hurdle. If he could forgive me for this, then… well, then we'd be okay...

At least, I think we will be…

_I used to think it was just a coincidence; an accident that ended up linking you and I together forever, whether I wanted it or not. _How do I justify this? My brain never worked right… and it seems it still doesn't.

_But now I know, it was meant to be that way, always. And I wouldn't have it any other way._

I couldn't turn my eyes to face him, although I could tell that he hadn't moved. He must have been lost in thought.

_Edward?_

No answer, no movement. I turned to face him, mostly out of fear. He was still as stone, but his mouth was tightly clenched, like he was fighting against something and I could feel the nervousness rise in me.

_Edward?_

In a flash, he was pulling me from my seat and holding my face. I was too panicked to do anything but allow him his actions. He stared into my eyes for what felt like forever, however it was just long enough to gain the attention of everyone in class including the teacher.

Then a smile broke out on his beautiful face. I couldn't help but return it. His smile turned smug but I didn't mind. "I love you, Bella, so much." He leaned down to me and before I could even consider the repercussions of his actions, I kissed him.

If I hadn't, he would have so why waste time. I needed to feel his lips.

The caress of his arms around my waist and his lips upon mine comforted me; let me know it would all work out. It made me feel as if we were alone… but we were anything but.

The entire classroom was silent except for a cat call here and there. I'm sure Edward could hear other comments, but then again, he was probably a bit distracted with our previous conversation and thoughts.

After a moment, Edward pulled back. I expected to see horror or shock or even an "Oh crap, what'd I do?" look, but he just looked… happy and still a bit smug.

I shook my head at him for a few reasons. One, his dopey grin was just too sexy and sly to resist. Two, he blew it; and I totally won the bet. Third, I needed to relay a message away from our audience.

_I'm going to storm off to get out of here. Play the rejected guy _one_ more time and meet me by the Volvo._

I emphasized the "one" to let him know it would be the very last time. I was tired of the games; of hiding. His eyes looked down, then up, to show me he understood and with that I yelled. "Jesus, we're in a classroom and you just attack me. Get away from me!" I mumbled an exiting line for good measure, and for my own pleasure. "Just because it's a boring class doesn't mean you have to provide your own excitement." I slammed the door and ran to the parking lot, avoiding both the east and south halls which held the rest of the family scattered among classrooms.

I considered picking the lock on the Volvo, but ultimately decided against it; I really didn't need Edward upset about me hurting his car after a kiss like that. I wanted no distractions since I intended to repeat that kind of kiss over and over again before the day was through.

"Is that the only reason you won't mess with my car?" Edward pulled my back against his chest while winding his arms around my waist and I immediately relaxed. I turned my head to kiss is neck and he purred; which was unexpected, but strangely electrifying.

"That; and now that you're here; we can go… so no grand theft auto for me." I twisted further and kissed his lips before pulling away and racing over to the passenger side. "Does she know?"

Edward laughed as we simultaneously entered the car and sped off down the street. "Of course she knows and she's speechless. As I ran through the front doors she was recounting all her previous visions looking for answers… she's got none." He pulled my hand over with his and refused to let go; not that I minded in the least.

"So… where to?" I whispered in his ear as I leaned onto his side of the car to kiss behind his ear.

Edward held my hand tightly as he groaned, trying to focus on the road. "Well in the long run; Isle Esme… but immediately… I believe you can decide." _Wait, what?_

"I won, Edward; so no Isle Esme." Maybe someday, but not now.

Laughing, Edward spoke again. "No my sweet, _you_ kissed _me._ I won, so whenever I can whisk you off, we'll be gone to the island… alone and together." He turned quickly to kiss my lips, stopping all train of thought for a brief moment.

By the time I collected my brain cells and put them back in a reasonable order, he was focused back on the road. I thought about the bet; and his actions… no, he broke the charade first by running to me and pulling from my seat… I won. "No, Edward, you grabbed me from my seat and told me you loved me, you broke the ruse. I won, and I decided to give you a consolation prize for your efforts." I stroked his hair with my fingertips which caused his head to lean back and a purr to rise in his throat, again. I smiled at my efforts and apparent success. I whispered, "Sorry you misunderstood…"

The car swerved onto the shoulder and the Volvo's engine was cut before I realized his foot had shifted to the brake. _Damn, he was a bit faster…_ Then I was pulled from my seat and placed on his lap with both his arms linked to the steering wheel, effectively restraining my waist. _Okay, a lot faster…_

His head ducked to my neck and he began to slide his nose up to just below my hair line and in direct contract with my ear. "Bella… love. I do not want to fight… however; I will tie you to my back and swim to Isle Esme." I smiled at his threat. "I'll hold you hostage till you get over this nonsense and _take it slow_ with me." I gulped; a non-existent, human habit that I apparently still committed when nervous. _Who knew?_

I pulled his head up to my own and pressed my forehead against his. "Okay, maybe a truce would be better…" Edward glared but nodded for me to continue. "I may have jumped a bit too soon and you may have led me to my actions." Edward released the wheel, but simply moved his hands to move up and down my back. "I think we need to spend some time together, alone." His eyes rose and I swear they twinkled. "But… I don't want to disappear for months, or years, and we will if we go _there._" I knew myself. I knew that a secluded beach with a glittering, doting Edward was not something I would give up easily.

"Bella…" Edward sighed, dropping his head in defeat to my shoulder. He was like a four-year old that just got told his trip to Disney was put off till next summer. I giggled as I stroked my fingers through his hair a few times.

I bent my lips next to his ear. "Edward…" I whispered. He sighed again, but began to softly kiss my shoulder in response. I laughed loudly and began to finish my earlier point. "We still need to talk… and just spend some time together alone. Why not a weekend away? Starting now?"

His eyes rose to mine and the sly smile returned. "It's Monday…"

"Okay; a week away." I giggled as his smile grew. "But still slow… but maybe a bit faster than previously discussed."

"Why?" He was suspicious and grateful all at once.

"Because you understand and you forgave me for holding out on you. And… I have to believe that that means something… more for us." I confessed as I looked at the roof of the Volvo as if it was an approaching storm cloud.

"It does… it means everything." He whispered into my hair as he hugged me close.

**A/N: Damn and I promised no more sap… oh well. All of you said you didn't mind. **

**I know I'm probably not your favorite person right now since it's been forever since my last update and this one was not very long. I am sorry for that. But it didn't feel right to drag it out. **

**I've been very busy lately; old car died, got new car, my students had FCAT (Florida State-wide Testing), and now I'm ending my Spring Break with lesson plans and fanfiction updates.**

**In case you missed it, I added a new story about a month ago (maybe less but I have lost track of time). It's called **_**And I Need You Now**_** and is based off of the song Need You Now but the comparison ends pretty early. It's only two chapters in but I will update as soon as the next chapter is done and it's about halfway (I'm planning for Emmett to be a big role… you know I love him).**

**I hope you check it out and review. **

**Thanks so much for those who review. Read, Review and Comment – You know I love it!**

**-kmwhyte**


	34. Into Your Arms

**I own: a nylon muzzle for my lovely, but destructive puppy.**

**I don't own : Twilight (any of it) or the music I make reference to (well, I do have it on iTunes and some on CDs, but I don't think that's what they're talking about…)**

**BPOV (Bella)**

We had been driving for… a long time.

I wasn't sure how long we had been driving, but it was dark now. I was still having a hard time pulling myself away from where I was.

I had been nestled into Edward's side since we agreed on taking the week away from the family. I had nuzzled my head into the crook of his neck and studied his arm that was wrapped around my shoulders; looking at all the various patterns I could imagine and ingraining each and every hair, freckle, and other anonymous mark into my vampire memory.

I was safe here. I was loved here.

And… he wasn't going to leave me here.

He wasn't going to leave _ever_. I had a hard time making myself say it, even though I did believe it. I used to say 'forever' in high school and it ended up ending after only a few months. It just seemed cruel and naïve to believe it so easily now.

But, somehow I did.

I shifted for the first time in hours and lifted my lips up to graze his neck before planting an open mouth kiss there. He sighed while leaning his head back against the headrest. "Ahh…" he groaned. "You cannot do that if you want to get where we're going…"

I giggled as I kissed his neck again… and again. "It doesn't matter where we go, Edward." And I truly believed that; we could go across the world to the most desolate or breathtaking place and I wouldn't even notice, if Edward was with me.

Edward groaned once more before sliding me to the opposite side of the car. I tried to discourage this, hell I would have jumped into his lap if not for the damage it would cause the car if we had crashed because of my actions. "Don't give me that look." He smiled as he stroked down my forehead to my cheek. "You'll like where we're going, I promise."

I couldn't argue with the light shining in his eyes. He was excited and I couldn't take that away. Instead I took the opportunity to place my feet in his lap and lean against the door, getting comfortable.

He laughed as I glanced at the clock, 9:23 pm. There were barely any cars on the road and since I hadn't paid any previous attention to our road trip, I had no idea where we were headed. "Where are you taking me?"

Edward's sidelong smirk reappeared. "It's a surprise, love."

I leaned forward and placed my pouting face on his arm, now holding onto the steering wheel. "Hint. _Please?_" I said it verbally, as well as mentally. And as much as it gave me joy to see the smirk turn into a full-blown smile, he still shook his damn head 'no.'

***

**EPOV (Edward)**

She had been silent for hours. She continued to stare me down; hoping, no doubt, that I would reveal our destination.

But, I refused to cave. She would appreciate where we were headed, although I _was _disappointed she hadn't figured it out yet.

We had been driving since we left biology and now it was just after four in the morning. We were close; we had passed the Washington state line already and I could practically see the city limit sign in front of us on the road.

I distracted myself by rubbing Bella's legs that were currently draped over my lap.

She giggled, although I knew it wasn't because I was tickling her. "I'm content, don't get me wrong," she started as I turned to face her. "But… I am _dying_ to know where in the world you are taking me, Edward."

I smiled, but didn't say a thing because; honestly… we would be seeing that 'Welcome to Forks' sign any moment now.

Eighty six seconds later, she gasped and straightened in her seat. "… Edward…" she whispered. "Oh, Edward."

She saw it, but she was silent after that.

_Did she like the surprise? Was she happy coming back to Forks? Was she angry? Was she afraid? Did she hate it here now? Did I do something terribly stupid?_

I turned and saw the tears welling in her eyes, but ultimately not falling. Again, I panicked as I pulled the car over. "Bella? What? Please tell me what you're thinking… _please?_"

She wouldn't look at me; instead she was completely engrossed in looking at the forest around us. _"I cannot believe you brought us here." _She spoke through her mind.

I hesitated, trying to decipher her indecipherable tone. "Is… is it okay?"

She turned to me then. "It's fine. This is… wonderful, Edward."

I sighed in relief, even with a slight hesitation, as she flung her arms around me and tucked her head under my chin. She stayed there for a long time and I had no intention of letting her go.

***

We approached the door slowly; even if we were humans, slowly. I headed for the electronic keypad, but then saw Bella bend down to the long-dead Poinsettia plant and dig a bit in the dirt.

I tilted my head, wondering what she was doing, but then I saw the dull silver key. "That's how you got in? When I wasn't here… you used the spare Esme left?"

She nodded her head as she looked down to put the key into the lock.

Once we were through the door, Bella froze and I nearly crashed into her. "Love?" I whispered after a moment, slipping my arms over her own and encasing her shoulders.

She kept her eyes gazing over everything still within the house. "I… I haven't been here in 18 years. And… and you haven't been here with me since… since you…" She didn't finish her statement, but I knew what she meant. _Since I left her._

I placed my chin on her shoulder and leaned in to whisper in her ear. "I'm sorry, Bella. Do you want to… do you want to leave?"

She turned to face me, quicker that I expected. "No!" She leaned up to kiss me. "No, I just… this is weird for some reason, you know?"

I nodded my head as she continued to look around the living room. After a moment she gripped my hand and led me to the stairs. "I want to show you something."

We passed by several bedrooms before stopping in front of Carlisle's former study. She turned to face me, then kiss me, before opening the door and pulling me inside.

Immediately, I knew what she was showing me. This is the place.

The place where she gave birth to our baby.

The place where she burned.

The place where she died.

She walked to the window and after touching the glass briefly she leaned against it and we locked eyes. "This is it." I didn't phrase it as a question and she didn't answer it either. "You disposed of it all." That she nodded to.

The scent of her human blood was faint, but still lingered even after 20 years. "Are you okay?" I hadn't realized that she was the one who spoke. It easily could have been me asking her that very same thing, but here _I was being consoled by her where she had burned_.

"You _died _here." I whispered, barely understanding the words I had spoken.

Bella walked over slowly, and then grasped both of my hands. "No. No, I _changed _here, Edward. There's a difference. If I had died, you and I wouldn't be together now." She pushed both of her hands through me hair, scratching at my scalp to put me at ease. "Come here."

She led the way and although I knew exactly where we were going, I stayed silent.

Bella opened the door to my old bedroom and then eased me through the door and down onto the couch. She didn't waste a second before curling up next to me. I smiled as she looked at me critically. "Sorry, old habits…" I mumbled.

"I know." She whispered in my ear before changing her position to straddling my lap. "I'm not dead though, Edward. I'm just… like you."

"And I'm thrilled about that, don't get-" I tried to explain. But she silenced me by holding her hand over my mouth.

"Are you happy? You're not mad at me at all? If you are, it's okay… I just need to know. No secrets, you know? You're okay with what I told you?" I should have interrupted her, but I was too dumbstruck to understand why she was saying those ridiculous questions, to me of all people…

"What?"

She looked to the ceiling and I saw the tears again. She gasped from taking in such a large breath. "You're not mad?"

"What for?" I couldn't fathom a reason I would be upset with her. She was perfect and she took me back. There would never be a reason for me to be mad at her.

"For lying to you. For hiding from you… " She spoke as if it was obvious, but I was shocked.

I held her face in my hands until her eyes focused in on mine. "Never!" I spoke fiercely. "I could _never_ be mad at you, Bella. And absolutely not for those reasons. You protected yourself and Renesmee, I can't be mad at that."

Bella sighed before looking at me with determination. She kissed my lips before drifting to my cheeks, forehead, chin, nose, and then down to my neck. I hummed under her touch, but stiffened when she began unbuttoning my shirt. "What… what are you doing?"

It was a _stupid _question. I knew what she was doing and I wanted it. I wanted it badly, more than anything else in this world. I wanted _her _more than anything else in this world.

_I wanted her_!

Bella laughed, but didn't stop until my shirt was completely open and her hands slipped underneath and then up onto my bare shoulders. "I thought it was obvious, Edward."

I hesitated, not knowing how to approach the situation.

Again, she surprised me. "Its okay, Edward." She looked me in the eyes again. "Its more than okay. I love you, and this is… perfect. You're perfect. And for some unknown reason you want me and I want you just as much if not more than that." She kissed me again and pulled my shirt away before lifting her own shirt over her head.

"Tell me this is a beginning…" she whispered, her voice cracking.

I paused, longer than I should have, I know. But I was trying to think of the prefect thing to say. I needed a comment that would stand up next to hers.

I pulled her right bra strap down and planted a line of kisses where it had lain. "No, it's not. We had an interlude… an intermission, but now… now it's continuing on…" I kissed her glorious lips. "… Forever."

She sighed happily as I repeated the process on her left shoulder as well.

**A/N: It's not done, I swear!!! Although there's only probably two chapters left from here on out. **

**You all wanted an M rating or a lemon… well, actually you all wanted many, many lemons but I'm not ready to add that stuff to my writing and not to this story at all…**

**I hope you liked it… let me know which part was your favorite.**

**AND READ my other story PLEASE!!!! 6 Chapters and still more to come.**

**Thanks so much for those who review. Read, Review and Comment – You know I love it!**

**-kmwhyte**


	35. Sorry

**I own: a pile of books that I have no idea when I'll read them…**

**I don't own : Twilight (any of it) or the music I make reference to (well, I do have it on iTunes and some on CDs, but I don't think that's what they're talking about…)**

**BPOV (Bella)… Hours later ;)**

We lay on the floor next to the couch…_ it proved to be inconvenient after a while to stay on the small surface…_

The sun had risen early and now it was fading away again.

We hadn't talked since we had shed our clothes; at least about nothing of consequence…

We weren't tired and probably didn't need to stop, but lying next to Edward was nearly as good as making love to him. He held me to his chest and stroked my back. Sometime during the day, he had brought out a blanket and it was now lying over us while I traced patterns on his chest.

Occasionally he would sigh and I would feel him shift to smell my hair before kissing my forehead. We hadn't looked each other in the eye for the longest time. I knew the silence wouldn't last forever, and by no means did I want it to, but I somehow found it hard to speak and ruin the bubble we were currently basking in.

"You're far too quiet, Bella. What are you thinking?" He was nervous for some reason, but then again so was I.

"I love you." I spoke without changing my position at all. I had said it countless times over the past hours, but I couldn't think of anything else to say. I couldn't bear to ruin everything.

"Are you… are you okay… happy, I mean?" My brain felt like goo for a moment. _How could I not be happy?_ I hadn't realized I projected the thought till he let out a sigh of relief. "Oh, thank God…"

I shifted then, pulling the blanket to cover myself while still leaving enough for him as well. "Do you really have to ask that?"

"It's been a long time… I wish I could say that I can read you just as well, but I can't. You seemed nervous." There it was… he read me fine, but he assumed the wrong cause of my nerves.

"You do read me well, Edward. I'm nervous, but not because of this." I gestured to us still naked within a blanket. "You said I _died_. Do you really feel that way?" I barely got the words out before he grasped my face that I had apparently turned away from him to look into his eyes.

"Bella… you know that isn't true. I flashed back for a split second, to when, to how I felt before. I'm selfish enough to want you forever, but I always thought you were too good for this life." I nodded, but dropped my eyes from him. "You could have died so easily. You could have figured it out too late and been sent to a hospital and they would have had no idea how to save you. You could have been alone when you went into labor. You could have not found the venom, or passed out before you could have used it. Angela could have not guessed correctly in helping you. Hell, it could have been too late to change you…" He rushed through the various outcomes before I looked up and begin running my fingers through his hair. I hoped to calm him with my actions and words, but he begged me with his eyes to stop. "I could have lost you so easily, Bella, and not even known it. And not known about Renesmee. I should've been there. I should've taken care of you like I promised; both of you."

I kept running my fingers up and down his scalp, but I could see the tears in his eyes. "Okay… okay, Edward. It's okay."

"I don't feel that you died... but you could have, Bella and I can't bear that thought at all. I love you too goddamn much." I was shocked by his language, but I couldn't disagree.

"Right back at you." I said as I kissed his eyelids. I held my arms around him for a long time and he didn't stray from laying his head on my shoulder. Every few minutes he would kiss where my neck meets my shoulder and on the thirty-third pass, I laughed, interrupting his actions. "Sorry, sorry."

"It's fine." He leaned back to look at me. The blanket had shifted during our conversation and we were now pressed together without it. He stroked up and down my back. "I think we've both said that enough, though, don't you?"

"Absolutely." I pressed my lips to his before lifting myself up and beginning to redress.

"What in the hell are you doing getting dressed?" For a moment, I was scared. He actually seemed upset in his voice, but when I turned, he was smiling.

I sighed in relief before pulling on my panties and clasping my bra. "We have a week, Edward and the sun is about to set." I threw his boxers in his face and he grinned evilly at me. "We have some people to check up on." He nodded before dressing quickly.

**EPOV (Esme!)**

I tried not to laugh as Alice paced in front of the couch. Renesmee snuggled into my side as Alice continued her rant.

"I cannot believe them! They lied to us! How dare they…" She turned around and continued to pace. "How long have they been lying? My god, they purposely were trying to make us feel guilty… Oh, I'm going to kill them when they come back… if they ever finish what they're doing… ugh!"

It was incredibly difficult to not laugh. She wasn't paying attention to any of us. I looked to Jasper who was sitting next to Rosalie and Emmett smiling slightly at his wife. I nodded my head towards her and he got up.

"Alice, relax." She looked at him as if he cut her credit cards up right in front of her. "I know, I know you're mad, but look at it from their point of view."

Again, she looked at him as if he had banned her from every mall in a 10,000 mile radius. "Are you kidding me right now, Jazz? You cannot be serious."

He sighed while holding her by her shoulders. "I am and deep down, you know I'm right. I'm sure it was lesson that they hoped you would learn." I felt Renesmee still beside me; completely ridden with guilt. "Let's go hunting, you'll think more rationally afterwards."

She glared at him, but relented… although she did shy away from his touch.

Once they were gone, everyone laughed. Emmett and Carlisle barely contained themselves. I looked over at Renesmee and she was the only one not laughing. "What's wrong, Sweet One?" I whispered as I combed her hair back with my fingers.

"Mom's never lied to me before," she mumbled.

Carlisle leaned towards us and lifted her chin. "Bella's your mom, but she's still Bella. As much time as you've spent with her, you still don't know every side of her. Neither do we. She loves you and nothing will change that." Renesmee nodded and laid her head on my shoulder. "With that being said… you cannot manipulate her." He laughed to show he wasn't mad and she smiled while nodding once again.

Emmett coughed, which was a sure sign of something since vampires never need to cough. Rosalie looked to him as he begged her to speak. She sighed, nearly giggling. "Renesmee." She looked over to her aunt. "You shouldn't manipulate anybody, really. It's not the most… attractive trait, even though we all do it to some degree." Renemsee looked confused until Rose tilted her head towards her husband.

Renesmee looked scared for a second before standing up and walking over to Emmett. I nearly laughed out loud when he flinched away from her touch. _He was terrified of his 20 year old, one hundred and twelve pound niece. _She sighed, exhausted from the commotion of the day, and simply placed her hand to his cheek.

They were both silent for a moment, but when she pulled away he nodded and pulled her in for a hug. Rosalie laughed. "So what did she have on you, Emmett?"

Emmett froze, looking at Renesmee with desperate eyes. "I promised him I'd never tell," Renesmee laughed.

"Damn." Carlisle muttered. All eyes focused on him. "What? I was curious…"

Renesmee laughed and held out her hand for me. "What, Sweet One?"

"Can you sit with me until I fall asleep?" She looked sheepish, which I attributed to her being fully grown asking for her grandma to tuck her in, but I had no intention of letting her take back the request. I had missed too much time and would gladly sit with her every night if she liked.

"Of course." I pulled her to my side and walked with her upstairs to the room Alice had so _discretely _decorated for her whenever she stayed over.

**A/N: I love you all!!! Its short I know, but I think both parts were a necessity in this story. I'm tired of them saying sorry and I love the fact that they're naked while discussing that aspect. LOL! Maybe two more chapters now, I want to wrap up Forks and then let them get back to the family… we'll see ;)**

**I hope you liked it… let me know which part was your favorite.**

**AND READ my other story PLEASE!!!! 6 Chapters and still more to come as soon as this is done.**

**Thanks so much for those who review. Read, Review and Comment – You know I love it!**

**-kmwhyte**


	36. Way Back Home

**I own: A new dress and accessories for one of my best friend's wedding this upcoming Saturday.**

**I don't own : Twilight (any of it) or the music I make reference to (well, I do have it on iTunes and some on CDs, but I don't think that's what they're talking about…)**

**BPOV (Bella)**

"Where to first?" Edward questioned as he begin swerving through the trees back to the main road.

I looked out the window, knowing the list of people I wanted to see. Actually, there were only two people that I wanted to see, _needed_ to see. I debated with myself, over and over for the next forty-five seconds, weighing the options and risks for visiting each, even from afar, when the sun had only just set.

I took a deep breath. "Charlie," I whispered.

Edward nodded and took the next turn necessary to lead us to my father's house. His hand came to rest on mine as I tried to regain the ability to breathe regularly, however unnecessarily.

Eleven minutes later, we were parked three blocks from Charlie's house. "How close are we getting, Bella?" I thought for a moment, but I came up with no answer.

Edward didn't wait for my answer, after a moment he was opening my side of the car and holding out his hand for mine. "We'll take it slow and decide when you know." I nodded, kissing his cheek as I passed him.

We blended into the trees, easily covered by the greenery that I had despised twenty years ago. Within seconds, I could see the lights shining from Charlie's kitchen. I held Edward's hand behind my back as I inched closer. I could see a woman busying herself with the production of dinner. "Hey, are you sure you're okay with just a salad?" She called towards the doorway.

My enhanced hearing caught the huff that came from the back of Charlie's throat before he called back to her. "Of course, Sue."

Edward laughed lightly behind me, leaning his mouth close to my ear. "He's not happy about the salad. He's thinking about sneaking out later for some fast food and telling her he got a call that he had to check something out near the high school to buy some time." I giggled, knowing that Charlie had not changed much after all.

It had been months since I had talked to him, nearly as long as Edward had come back into my life. I was well aware that Charlie had remarried; he had been seeing Sue for about sixteen years and they had married seven years ago. He had begged me to come home for the wedding. It wasn't going to be anything big, but he wanted me to meet my step-siblings and his new wife.

I wanted to come back of course, but how could I?

I had never aged and I couldn't leave Renemsee alone.

"You haven't called him in a long time…" Edward whispered in my ear and I instantly felt guilty. "He misses you, so much."

"He's thinking about me?" I knew the answer before Edward confirmed it by nodding into my shoulder. I grasped his hand tighter, as I moved away from watching Sue in her domestic glory and on to the side of the house where I could see into the living room.

My breathing halted as I looked into my former home at Charlie, my_ dad_. He was withered, but strong. His wavy hair was peppered with gray and was combed back in his traditional, official fashion. He was wearing a navy blue button up shirt with a pocket on each side of his chest, both pockets completely filled with pens, paper, badge, and other things I could not decipher from my location. His pants were regulation from the police department, that much I was sure of.

He leaned back in the same recliner that he had when I had lived with him. There were patches over frayed material long since deteriorated.

His right hand held the remote control up searching for a decent game to watch either before or during dinner with Sue. He grinned as he found a Seahawks game from 1984 on ESPN. "I remember that one…" He mumbled as he leaned back and placed the remote next to his right leg in between the cushions.

I smiled, nearly shedding tears at the sight of my _dad_ acting in his normal fashion. It was as if time had barely changed, except it had completely.

He was married. And he was twenty years older.

"He's still thinking about you, though." Edward whispered, sensing my heartache like only he could.

"What's he thinking?" I whispered, not sure if I wanted to know.

Edward pulled me back into his chest, holding me securely around my waist as if he expected me to fall any second from the revelation. "He's counting the days since you last called him."

"97." I mumbled.

Edward nodded into my shoulder. "Yes. He's wondering how you've changed, if you look like Renee since you're twenty years older." I laughed without humor. "He's also wondering if you're happy, if you've found someone that makes you happy or at least friends that you trust. He worries that you're all alone, Bella." I sighed, leaning back into Edward completely.

"I want to talk to him." Edward shifted me in his arms, fishing out his cell phone, but I halted his movements with my own. "No, not on the phone. I want to talk to him in person. I want to walk in through the front door and tell him that I'm happy with you, and our daughter. I want to tell him that even though I can't tell him everything and that even though I can't communicate with him except with a phone for his safety, that I think of him so much and I miss him. I want to assure him that I didn't have a choice in abandoning him and that I love him."

I felt the sobs as I finished my rant. Edward turned me around so I could sink into his chest. He didn't say a word as I completely fell apart.

I shifted as a growl sounded behind Edward. I was immediately placed behind him as he sunk into a couch. "Bella, go, please…"

"Not a chance." As I spoke the source of the growl came from between several trees into our view. The creature appeared to be a wolf, but it was massive, roughly the size of a horse. _A muscular, fur covered horse._

"It's not what you think." I was about to respond, until Edward held up a hand and continued to speak. "We didn't come to fight or attack. We just came to check up on him." The wolf growled again, loudly, and I realized Edward wasn't speaking to me.

I heard Sue drop a plastic bowl before telling Charlie she was going out to get something from the car. She sounded rushed, frazzled maybe?

"I _am_ Edward Cullen. Please, let me explain." Edward tried to push me behind him more, but I refused to budge, wrapping my arms around his waist.

Sue broke through the brush, glaring at Edward and me before turning to the wolf and speaking. "Leah, go. They're fine. You knew they'd come sooner or later." The wolf, my apparent step-sister, shifted before bolting through the woods and ultimately disappearing.

"Bella." It wasn't a question, a statement of fact, if anything. I nodded. "I guess I was right." She sighed.

Edward turned to pull me behind him, yet again, but I pushed him back to take a step closer to Sue. She watched my approach, but didn't move an inch. "You know what I am, don't you?"

"Of course, I do." She smiled, but it didn't reach the eyes. "Why are you back, though?"

"I wanted to see how he was. How long have you known what I am?" I couldn't help, but ask. Obviously, some legends were truer than I knew, werewolves included, but how could she know I was a vampire.

"Since I began seeing your father. It wasn't hard to figure out. You were a part of the Cullens for so long and you disappeared so soon after them, it seemed obvious to me." I nodded before asking if Charlie knew. "Of course not. He wouldn't know what to do with the information; he's perceptive, annoying so…" She whispered under her breath and I immediately was on guard.

Edward spoke, just for me to hear then. "You misunderstand, Bella. He's suspicious about the wolves and specifically her children, Leah and Seth. But she loves him more than anything; she meant nothing else by that remark." I nodded, felling slightly better about the comment.

"He can't handle seeing you, Bella." Sue spoke again. "You haven't changed from the last picture he has of you on our mantle." I shifted back to Edward's arms; it seemed I was meant to stay there. "But, Bella…" She hesitated and her voice shifted to… a maternal tone, almost. "Call him more. He misses you so much. He doesn't tell me often, he pretends he understands more than he does, but it kills him that you're away and never visit. Whether you chose this or not, you owe him that."

I nodded and she began to walk away, back to the house.

I stepped forward, earning a growl from who I assumed was Leah watching me from the woods. "Sue." She turned slowly, giving me a sad smile. "Thank you for taking care of him. I wish… I wish I could have known you as a step mother under different circumstances."

She laughed slyly. "If only we lived outside of myths and fairytales. I feel the same, Bella." And with that, she returned to the house, calling to Charlie that she was adding chicken to the salad.

**A/N: This was not what I planned at all. I had intended for the both them to go check on some Forks' residents, but then the wolves and Sue just had to show me they had other plans. It seriously took me by surprise and I hope you like it. There will be one more chapter in Forks and then a final chapter. This time I promise… only two more chapters.**

**I toyed with the idea of a sequel, but honestly, I don't think it will happen because I am rewriting the Forks history that would have set it up for the sequel. **

**Please let me know what you think, I left Sue kind of cold, but I think that Sue would act that way. She is protective of Charlie, but she knows she doesn't have to fear Bella or the Cullens.**

**Anyways, here's the deal. I have two and half weeks of school left and I am not writing until I'm out. I need to focus on my lovely, and sometimes evil children. **

**Thanks so much for those who review. Read, Review and Comment – You know I love it!**

**-kmwhyte**


	37. You Wanna Make It Right, We Can Make It

**I own: Some beautiful flowers and a Build-A-Bear Monkey from my students.**

**I don't own : Twilight (any of it) or the music I make reference to (well, I do have it on iTunes and some on CDs, but I don't think that's what they're talking about…)**

**EPOV (Edward)**

_If only we lived outside of myths and fairytales…_

I would have agreed with Sue Clearwater long ago, twenty years ago actually. But now... Never would I trade the life I was thrilled to be living with Bella and our daughter and our family. This actuality was more than I could ever hope to have.

But watching Bella gaze back at her former home with her father so close as we escaped through the forest made me want for it again, for her sake.

I swore I heard her sob once as she skirted in front of me to the car. She swept her hair back over one shoulder and leaned against the Volvo taking heavy, deep breaths. I approached her and pulled her into my side to which she molded herself into. "Bella." I had no idea what I was intending to speak so I simply closed my mouth and held her tighter.

She nodded into my chest and sighed before finally speaking again. "Thank you."

I laughed, not out of humor, but confusion. "For what, love?"

"For being you, for being here with me." I nodded, stroking her hair.

"Of course, I love you. I'm always with you." She nodded and pulled herself away from my grasp.

"One more stop," she whispered as she slipped into the driver's side of the Volvo.

We hadn't driven far, but it seemed that way since we were silent and she had obeyed the traffic laws with an unhealthily obsession. _Must be the return to Forks…_

She pulled up to a white two-story house, maybe four bedrooms if the owners were fond of small living quarters. The landscaping with sparse and easily maintained because of that fact. Bella turned off the car and handed me the keys, she then pulled her legs up into her chest and blankly stared at the house's one lit window in the left, top story.

I had a good idea of whose house we were at, and when I spotted the name on the mailbox, Cheney, I was positive where we were. Still, I asked. "Bella, who are we here to see?"

"Angela." The answer was exactly as I expected, quiet, yet bold. She wanted to actually _talk_ to Angela.

"How did you know this is where she lived?"

Bella didn't hesitate in answering. "I always kept tabs on her just in case she ever needed my help. She took care of me when no one… and she cared so much for Renesmee. If she ever needed me, I wanted to be able to return the favor." Bella turned to face me, giving me a sad smile. "I didn't earn her friendship, but she gave it anyways."

I nodded, although I wanted to dispute the fact that she didn't deserve a friend such as Angela. She smiled, a bit more brightly and continued. "She married Ben two years after high school and a year later, they had their first child, Noah. Soon after, they had Jeffery and then Isabel." I smiled, sure that the name was tribute to Bella in some way. "They moved into this house about… ten and a half years ago. Angela's an assistant attorney and Ben's in the computer engineering field, mainly dealing with software development."

Bella quirked an eyebrow as I chuckled under my breath, but of course, she heard it. "Have something to say?" She asked, not entirely pleased.

"No, I was merely thinking that you could possibly be the most caring…" I fumbled for a word that wouldn't offend, but she beat me to the punch.

"Stalker?" She smiled at me as I sheepishly nodded my head. "Thanks, Edward. That's such a sweet thing to say about the person you claim to love more than anything."

I stared at her fingers as I grasped them tightly. "It speaks volumes about how far we've come, don't you think?" She nodded, smiling without fear of me fleeing. "So…" I paused, waiting for her eyes to meet mine. When they finally did, I continued. "How do you want to proceed?"

_Now, she hesitates._

I watched her war with herself. Finally she spoke. "She knows that something was… different about Renesmee… and us. She never asked for an explanation and I don't intend to give one, but…"

I continued where she trailed off. "But, you want to tell her how much it meant to you, how much she helped you. In person." She nodded. "Ben and the kids; they can't know Bella." She nodded, but she looked hopefully up to the window.

I listened to the quiet house. Somewhere there were two children snoring lightly. There was muttering about 'stupid bio homework' from none other than 'ancient Mr. Banner.' _The man must be in his early eighties by now, poor Noah…_

Listening closely, I also heard Ben's thoughts. He was dreaming about his family… in a video game. It was sweet, in a slightly odd way. Near him, I could hear Angela's thoughts and the occasional "hmmm." She was studying a case file, looking for loopholes for her supervisor. It would have been done earlier, but she had been helping Isabel pick out an outfit for school the next day. Apparently picture day was a huge deal in a 13 year old's life. I sighed thinking about Renesmee.

"Angela and Noah are the only ones awake. Now's the best time, otherwise you'll have to wake her." She nodded, but didn't make an effort to move. "Bella?"

Her eyes focused back to mine. "Yeah." Neither a statement nor a question according to her tone.

I kissed Bella's knuckles, before opening the car door for myself. "I'll be back. I actually have some things I'd like to say to Angela as well."

I sighed, looking at my watch, noting the lateness of our visit. Slowly I knocked once, twice.

"_Really, one in the morning someone knocks…" _Angela's thoughts were suspicious, but not threatened. I smiled remembering she is a Forks native through and through. Noah didn't even acknowledge the sound in the slightest.

Angela came down the stairs, slowly, finally starting to feel uneasy about answering her front door at one in the morning without her husband at her side. I turned to see how Bella was doing, but her eyes went past me straight to the door being opened.

"Wow." It was hushed, quiet in volume, but loud in acknowledgement. Her thoughts were rushed and I nearly couldn't keep up with the theories she was confirming and denying with the discovery that I had not aged over the last twenty years.

"Angela." She quickly regained her composure and shut the door as she came outside to face me.

"It's really you." Her thoughts were more verbal, more astounding, and more… expletive. "Bella, she had your… you know right? You must know…" I nodded, smiling slightly.

"That's why we're here. I wanted to thank you, Angela. You have… no idea the gratitude I feel for what you did for them. I could have lost them and not even known it. I can't put into words what it means to me. If you ever need anything, I will find a way to help you."

She smiled, before speaking. "I did it because Bella needed me and she's my friend, or was." She whispered the last words. "I would do it all over again."

With those words, the memories started. I saw the whole thing through Angela's human eyes; the scream from Bella, the office set up for the birth, the syringes which were completely confusing to her, the blank face from Bella when the pain caused her to pass out, the shot into her leg, the shock from Bella when she realized the venom was injected, the ripping of Bella's stomach, the bloody baby that was my daughter, the helplessness in Bella's eyes begging Angela to leave her and take Renesmee with her.

I stumbled, grasping the pillar on Angela's porch. "You didn't have to do it, thank you so much, Angela." I muttered, still reeling from her memories.

"Like I said, I would do it again, Edward." She paused, looking to the Volvo behind me. "She's with you," she whispered. Bella ran from the car, barely controlling the speed of her approach before hugging Angela tightly, yet softly.

I watched as sobs rocked Bella's body. She chanted a low 'thank you, thank you' in Angela's ear. After several minutes, they pulled apart. "I can't explain everything," Bella spoke.

"You haven't changed, at all."

Bella nodded. "I can't explain that. I would if I could."

"You two are together," Angela smiled, nodding that she understood that explanations couldn't be shared.

"Yes." Bella wrapped her arm that wasn't holding on to Angela around my waist.

"What about Renesmee?" Angela's smile faltered for a second, wondering if this was the bad news part of the conversation.

Bella pulled my wallet from my back pocket, stealing the picture she had given to me and giving it over to Angela. "Wow, she looks so much like how I pictured; a perfect combination." Angela whispered, lightly fingering the photograph. "She's twenty, now, right?"

"Yes, she's wonderful, determined," Bella smiled at the comment.

"I knew that when she was born." Angela nodded. "You all have to leave, don't you?" Both Bella and I nodded. "I'm not surprised. I am glad you finally found each other and that I got to see you again." She held up the photo to give back to Bella. "And her."

Bella hugged Angela again. "Keep it. She's your goddaughter; you need a picture of her." Angela whispered a 'thank you' fighting back tears. "Goodbye."

"Goodbye."

I reached over Bella, gaining Angela's attention. "I mean it. If you ever need or want anything. All you have to do it ask." She nodded, although I could tell she would never ask for anything. _A hefty scholarship for Noah, Jeffery, and Isabel may be some sort of repayment…_

I opened the car door for Bella and then sprinted to the other side. "Back to the house?" I questioned.

"No." I turned to face Bella as we drove. "I know I said a week, but… Let's go home."

I smiled, and pulled her hand to my lips to kiss. "Home."

**A/N: It's not like they could really get into the vampire history and Angela would never pry. She's incredibly happy with her life, her family. This was the closure both her and Bella needed, and in a way Edward as well. **

**There is one more chapter left! Wow, I nearly have been at this story for a year and I sincerely loved every review, comment, and PM I received about it. I have felt inspired and motivated. You all made it totally worth it! I hope you all continue on with me with "And I Need You Now." **

**I plan on finishing this story within the next week or so, hopefully before Eclipse comes out! And then I'll attempt to update AINYN about once a week throughout the summer.**

**After that, I just want to write more. But my ideas are not there. PM me with requests… storylines or prompts, please!**

**Thanks so much for those who review. Read, Review and Comment – You know I love it!**

**-kmwhyte**


	38. The Only Exception

**I own: Twilight Puzzle from Books-A-Million for 7 bucks, hell yeah!**

**I don't own : Twilight (any of it) or the music I make reference to (well, I do have it on iTunes and some on CDs, but I don't think that's what they're talking about…)**

**BPOV (Bella)**

I nearly wanted to sleep; it would have made the trip that much faster. Once I had decided that my unfinished business in Forks was, well for lack of a better word, finished; I just wanted to go home with Edward to our family.

I don't know what I expected when I moved to Ohio months ago, but this wasn't it. I never expected to be with Edward again and I never expected for my daughter to become a scheming mastermind. I never thought that I missed them all so much; absence from them seemed to cloud those already fuzzy memories, I suppose.

I could find no part of me that regretted anything that had happened in my life. Nothing at all.

It was true that I missed time with Edward and the rest of them, and I couldn't deny that I wish they had been with me to watch Renesmee grow and help me with the change, but still…. There was no part of me that regretted how it played out because the end result was so beautiful and perfectly fitted to who we had all become.

I hadn't changed as much as I thought I had; Edward was right. I changed because I grew up, which would have happened with or without him, and with or without changing into a vampire. And just as I was wrong about that, I was wrong about Edward not changing at all. He changed by becoming the man I always knew he was. The man who believed he was a monster without a soul was gone and I couldn't be more thankful. He was truly Edward now.

I couldn't wipe the smile from my face for the entire time we rode back and I had a strong assumption that Edward was beaming because of that. Every now and then he would chuckle and kiss my hand or rub my thigh in comfort, not that I complained.

"What is so funny?" I leaned over to kiss his cheek.

He chuckled again. "Nothing, I just love to see you happy."

"Well, I love the fact that you're the one making me happy." I turned his face to kiss him quickly.

He sighed, turning back to face the road. "You can't keep doing that, as much I like it. I'll have to pull over before long and we're almost home."

I sighed. "Then maybe you _should_ pull over." He turned and I winked. He groaned, before pulling off into a secluded spot. _Good thing, it's dark out…_

After not too long, we were resuming our trip after our brief, but fulfilling, detour.

It didn't take long to get to the Cullens' house. Before we even turned off the engine, Esme, Carlisle, Emmett, Rosalie, and Jasper were in the yard smiling. Edward smiled at me, before kissing me quickly and then speeding over to my door to help me out. I took his hand and brought him over to Esme and Carlisle. They both embraced us. "Thank you for taking care of Renesmee," I whispered to Esme.

She pulled back, sweeping the hair from my face. "You never have to thank me for taking care of my granddaughter, dear." I smiled, as she embraced me again. She then whispered in my ear. "After all, I expect to be doing it whenever you and Edward escape again. You may leave her with us whenever you need to, Bella." The way she spoke, I nearly wanted to blush at what I could have sworn she insinuated.

Carlisle hugged me as well, before Emmett grabbed me and swung me around as if I was a ragdoll. I heard Edward let a warning growl erupt, but I merely laughed. "It's nice not having to be careful, right Bella? No fear of breaking tends to make the sex better, am I right?" He raised his eyebrows up and down, and I nearly thought he was waiting for an answer.

"Whatever, Emmett." I shook my head, looking at Edward's smug expression. "Really? Not what I expected, Edward." I expected a verbal smack down if anything, but it seemed that Edward was proud of the assumption Emmett made.

"Ignore them. I'm glad this all worked out for you, Bella." I whispered a thanks as Rose swatted her husband away to embrace me quickly.

Jasper was standing off to the side. I walked over and smiled. "Don't I get a hug?" I asked, and before I could even pout, he had me in his arms.

"Of course you do." He whispered in my ear.

"Aww, Jazz, such an emotional homecoming…" I laughed. I looked to all of them as Jasper released me and Edward wrapped an arm around my waist. "I'm sorry."

While Emmett, Rose, and Jasper just nodded, Esme looked confused. "What for, dear?"

"For making most of you feel guilty about your interference at the dance, you were just trying to help. And I know you were up against a pair of masterminds. You didn't really have a choice."

"No kidding." Emmett muttered.

I laughed, but then I heard a tiny squeal of excitement. When I turned around, Renesmee was staring at Edward and me locked together. She looked thrilled, but hesitant. I sighed, looking at Edward, who only smiled back. "Oh, come here, baby."

She ran right into my arms. No one would ever believe she was my daughter, sisters maybe, but we looked the same age and size. "I'm sorry, but…" she whispered quietly.

"I know." I stroked her hair before pulling her back to look at me. I lifted her chin to look into her eyes. "I'm sorry, too. But you understand why I left, right?" She nodded. "I'm the mother, Renesmee, and you don't get to manipulate me because things aren't going your way, but I won't leave you again like that. I'm sorry, baby."

"Yeah, me too." She nodded again, clearly embarrassed.

Edward leaned into me. "You never lied to her before. That left an impression apparently." I sighed, still stroking her hair.

"I see." Renesmee evaded my eye contact after that. I looked around to see that everyone else had disappeared, leaving us alone, as a family. "I'm sorry I lied, Renesmee. I won't do that again, ever, but neither can you. Things worked out this time, but not because of what you did, but because your father and I wanted it that way. There's a difference between helping and coercion." I smiled, trying to stay light.

Edward tilted Renesmee's chin so he could look at her. "Your aunt isn't always the best role model and you're old enough to know the difference." She nodded looking down. "With that being said, I'm not upset." He smirked while we both looked up in disbelief. He laughed. "I'm sorry, Bella, but her heart was in the right place, and that does count for something. She just wanted all of us to be a family…" He looked into Renesmee's eyes again. "And now we will be, forever." He pulled us both into his arms and I kissed him while Renesmee buried her head into his chest.

I whispered over her head. "You're a good father." He beamed with pride and kissed me again.

We sat outside for a bit, just the three of us, telling Renesmee about what we did during our trip. _Well, the majority of our trip…_ She was happy we were able to talk through everything, at least the important things, the immediate things. The things that would tear us apart from each other. All that was behind us.

She wasn't thrilled that she missed out on seeing Angela again, but Edward told her about his masterful plan to support her children in college. _Maybe Renesmee didn't get her scheming ways from Alice after all…_ Of course, Renesmee was thrilled and offered to help setting up anything he needed help with.

I hesitated telling Renesmee about Charlie, simply because I wasn't sure how I felt about it yet. I felt like I still needed to _see_ him. And I longed to be honest with him, just enough to let him know I was taken care of and that I was loved. And I really, _really_ wished I could have told him that he was a grandfather.

While I over thought the situation, Edward admitted to it all. "We also went to see Charlie…" He trailed off, seeing my face freeze. He looked like a deer caught in the headlights, or caught by a Cullen…

I sighed, shaking my head. "_Grandpa_ Charlie?" Renesmee asked, staring into my eyes.

I nodded, sitting her in between Edward and me on the hood of the Volvo. He looked horrified as Renesmee and I both pulled our feet up, but I quickly rid our shoes before Edward had a vampire version of a heart attack. "We just saw him from afar. He wouldn't be able… I can't bring him into this." I moved some of her curls back behind her ear. "You've always known that, right? That we can't have Charlie in on any of this?"

Renesmee nodded. "But you miss him so much, Mom. How could you go so close and not _see_ him."

I shook my head, knowing if he had been alone and had Edward not been with me, I probably would have approached Charlie… and he would have probably had a heart attack. "It's not fair to my dad to let him get close to me again and then put him in danger or just up and leave…"

Edward reached over to clasp my hand in his. Renesmee looked at our hands over her lap and smiled. Edward squeezed my hand and I looked up. "Bella, maybe… maybe we can find a way…" I shook my head.

"No, it's not right to tempt fate, or the wolves." I smiled, trying desperately to assure him, but it seemed that I was failing.

"Wolves?" Renesmee asked, trying to hide her smile.

Edward explained the situation to her and hearing it from his point of view, seeing as how he knew that history better than me, made me feel a bit better about having my step siblings be werewolves. Or at least it made me feel better knowing that they could take care of Charlie…

"Wow." Renesmee looked completely shocked, but intrigued. _Great, she always had a thing for the mythical…_ "I gotta go talk to Rose about this…"

As Renesmee ran inside, Edward pulled me over and onto his lap. I rested my head on his shoulder as he played with my fingers. After a few moments of silence, comfortable silence, he spoke. "You know, we could figure something out… Maybe we could figure out a way for Charlie to be in your life more without seeing you in person. There's technology now that could-"

I interrupted him by pulling his lips to mine. After I pulled away, I turned in his arms to hold his face with both hands. "You… are wonderful," I sighed, and he smiled. "But I don't think so, at least, not yet. I need to just _talk_ to him more first, see if he can handle anything more than that. I want to tell him about you and Renesmee, but I'm not sure if he can handle either of those bombshells." I laughed.

He pulled my hand away and concentrated on playing with my fingers again. "Because I left you twenty years ago, knocked up, even though I had no idea. And you never told him you had a twenty year old daughter, who's immortal, even though he probably doesn't need to know that." I nodded, laughing. "Why are you laughing?" He began to laugh, too.

"Because, who the hell could even make this stuff up?" He continued to laugh, pulling me closer. "We have such a ridiculous life… but I love it."

Edward whispered in my hair. "Good, because it's never going to change."I sighed. _Good, _I thought for him to hear. "Hmmm," he sighed, nuzzling my neck.

"What?" I muttered, running my fingers through his silky hair.

He pulled his face back from my hair and smirked. "I really want to stay like this, but someone is waiting for us to make an appearance." He looked to the house.

"Alice."

"Alice." He agreed, while I shook my head. "She expects us to apologize."

I felt my mouth drop. "Excuse me?"

"Apparently, she believes that we were more deceitful than her, and now she's pouting." He shook his head.

"No, I'm not!" We both turned to see Alice looking at us with her hands on her hips. I looked up to see Jasper shaking his head while looking at the open window that she must have jumped from. He looked away, but I saw the hint of a smile on his face.

I sighed, knowing this could either go one of two ways and I was all for the easiest and quickest route. "Hi Alice, I missed you, too." I smiled.

"Don't you dare. I know that you hid from my visions and lied. How'd you do it?" She threw her hands up in defeat, and both Edward and I attempted not to chuckle at her behavior. "Don't you dare laugh at me," she pointed a finger at the both of us.

I looked to Edward. _Just go with it, okay?_ I thought and he nodded. "Alice, we're sorry. We may have been a bit… bitter for your liking, but being manipulated isn't something either of us accepts well, especially when you involve our daughter." Alice started to smirk, as Edward wrapped his arms tight around my waist, nodding into my shoulder. "Can you see where we were coming from? You weren't even going off a vision, you were scheming blind, Alice."

Alice continued to stare, while I traced Edward's knuckles with my finger tips. "Oh fine, I get it." I laughed, pulling away from Edward so I could go hug Alice. "I'm sorry," she said with maybe the least bit of remorse she could muster.

"It's okay, Alice." I pulled back to look into her face. "But if you do it again, whether you involve our daughter or not, I will kick your tiny, pixie butt."

I think I may have finally caught her by surprise as she looked disbelievingly at me. She collected herself quickly, smiling slowly. We began to walk inside, until she turned around. "You know, I wasn't completely blind." I shook my head, trying to drop the subject, but she continued. "I saw all of us living together in the next town we move to, and the next, and the next, and eventually we'll get back to Forks…" She trailed off, flitting back into the house.

Edward pulled me back and wrapped his arms around me. I stood on the first step of the porch so I was eye level with him. "Where it all began…" He whispered.

"Seems fitting," I sighed, running my hands up his arms to his shoulders.

He pulled me in for a kiss, before we walked in to be with our family, together.

**A/N: Wow. It's done… I got to say, I'm rather sad it's over. This is my first fan fiction and even though it has grown by leaps and bounds considering the expectations I had for it… I just can't say how proud I am of it. **

**I cannot thank you all enough for the support you all have given me. There are too many of you to name here and I would hate to forget a single person. But…**

**Those of you that have followed and favorited, I can't thank you enough. **

**Those of you that have reviewed, you rock my socks off. **

**And those that have reviewed and given me comments, praise, suggestions, and everything else I've asked for, I love you, ALL of you!**

**I hope you continue to read my stories, especially **_**And I Need You Now**_** because it needs some love. I'm starting to get really inspired with that one and plan on it being a bit more sarcastic, but of course drama-heavy. **

**Sequel News: I know I leave it open for a sequel, but I have no plans for a sequel at this time, but I'm not saying that I never will, so keep checking back. I loved this story and even if I don't do a sequel, I may do an outtake or two from their lives in the future so make sure you follow or favorite both this story and the outtakes. I will be posted the playlist as a new chapter, so don't get too excited… sorry ;)**

**Hope you enjoyed the ride with me and that you'll review, even if you have never reviewed before or if you're reading this two years after I posted it. I'll always want to know what you liked ;)**

**-kmwhyte**


	39. Playlist

Enjoy the Music that I used while writing ;)

Music References for Give Her Some Credit

Playlist on YouTube: www(dot)youtube(dot)com/my_playlists?pi=0&ps=20&sf=&sa=0&sq=&dm=0&p=D2FBE9AA4879F4DD

Chapter One: I'll Love you Forever, But Now It's Over (Lyric from Lovedrunk by Boys Like Girls)

Chapter Two: You're in Ruins (Lyric from 21 Guns by Green Day)

Chapter Three: World Spins Madly On (Song by The Weepies)

Chapter Four: Wish You Were (Song by Kate Voegele)

Chapter Five: Nothing Ever Hurt Like You (Song by James Morrison)

Chapter Six: What Can I Say (Song by Brandi Carlile)

Chapter Seven: Lightning Crashes (Song by Live)

Chapter Eight: Pack up, I'm a Stray (Lyric from Maps by Yeah, Yeah, Yeahs)

Chapter Nine: Closer (Song by Kings of Leon)

Chapter Ten: Give Me Back my Point of View (Lyric from Look What You've Done by Jet)

Chapter Eleven: Walking with a Ghost (Song by Tegan and Sara)

Chapter Twelve: Clouds with that Sweet Silver Lining (Lyric from Sweet Silver Lining by Kate Voegele)

Ch12 Renesmee's Playlist: Pink (Song by Aerosmith) Wikked Li'l Grrrls (Song by Esthero) La La Lie (Song by Jack's Manaquinn) Funny Little Feeling (Song by Rock 'N' Roll Soldiers)

Chapter Thirteen: Can't Breathe Without You, But I Have To (Lyric from Breathe by Taylor Swift)

Chapter Fourteen: Stay (Song by SafetySuit)

Ch14 Renesmee's Thoughts: The Future Freaks Me Out (Motion City Soundtrack)

Chapter Fifteen: You Can Be The Light (Song by Brandon Young) (FYI: I can't find the song on YouTube, he's not well-known, actually he's a friend of a friend but he's album is on iTunes.)

Chapter Sixteen: This Boy (Song by James Morrison)

Chapter Seventeen: Missing You (Song by Tyler Hilton)

Ch17 Alice's Thoughts: I Wanna (All-American Rejects)

Chapter Eighteen: How Did We Get Here? (Lyric from Decode by Paramore)

Chapter Nineteen: Caught in the Middle of Crossfire (Lyric from Sink or Swim by Tyrone Wells)

Chapter Twenty: Everything's Gonna be A'Okay, A'Okay (Lyric from Do It Alone by Sugarcult)

Chapter Twenty One: Already Gone (Song by Kelly Clarkson)

Chapter Twenty Two: Cry (Song by Kelly Clarkson)

Chapter Twenty Three: Bad Influence (Song by P!nk)

Chapter Twenty Four: We Don't Care if we Cause Commotion (Lyric from Sick by Just Kait)

Chapter Twenty Five: Happy Birthday (Song by The Click Five)

Chapter Twenty Six: Whatcha Say (Song by Jason DeRulo)

Chapter Twenty Seven: You're Not Sorry (Taylor Swift)

Chapter Twenty Eight: Cinderella's Got to Go (Lyric from Cinderella by Britney Spears)

Song Playing at the Formal: Forever Young by Youth Group

Chapter Twenty Nine: Halfway Gone (Song by Lifehouse)

Chapter Thirty: I Run to You (Song by Lady Antebellum)

Chapter Thirty One: Vertigo (Song by Anya Marina)

Chapter Thirty Two: Your Love is a Song (Song by Switchfoot)

Chapter Thirty Three: Follow Me Down (Song by 3Oh!3)

Chapter Thirty Four: Into Your Arms (Song by The Maine)

Chapter Thirty Five: Sorry (Song by Buckcherry)

Chapter Thirty Six: Way Back Home (Song by The Wreckers)

Chapter Thirty Seven: You Want to Make It Right, We Can Make It (Lyric from Come On by The Gree River Ordiance)

Chapter Thirty Eight: The Only Exception (Song by Paramore)


	40. Sequel

I have now added the the start of the sequel to Give Her Some Credit; Where Credit is Due.

Head over and Enjoy!

~kmwhyte


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